Laughing and moving on was so much harder than it should've been. Even so, life continued. Ms. Raven was kind enough to not tell my parents, saying she knew I wouldn't burst out again. The other people in class moved on quicker than I did. Within a week, the incident was forgotten.

I rolled my pencil back and forth across my side of the table. The edges scratched my palm and a sound much like a hamster on its wheel sounded quietly. Isabelle's gray eyes sparkled with interest.

"You know," she said, "You could dent the table." By the way her eyes continued to glow, I knew she didn't care. It was her trying to be angry at me for ruining Avani's life. Ever since the incident, Isabelle refused to talk to me unless the topic was related to school. So far, she failed three times. I kind of liked the fails, it helped me forget everything that had happened and feel less lonely.

"Okay," Ms. Isola said. She stood next to a large question in red on the board. "Take out your Reading Notebooks and answer this question: how far would you go to save a friend?"

If I even had any friends. I stopped my pencil and reached under my chair for my five subject notebook. The rough cover met my fingertips and I pulled it up onto the desk. I flipped through the sections divided by translucent black pages.

When I looked up I saw Avani twisted around in her chair, looking at me. Her brown eyes flitted away from my blue and she ducked her head down to her desk. The purple strands of her headband flapped as she moved. We hadn't spoken since my outburst and I doubted we ever would. We no longer waited to walk with one another. I was sure she went with Leila. I would check with Isabelle, but she had been avoiding me, too. Avani looked so sad all the time. I didn't know why.

I directed my attention back to the lined paper in front of me. I didn't know how to answer. I knew the right answer, but I also knew what I would do from my experience not too long ago. I looked at Isabelle's nearly complete page. Arya was on her second page already. I sighed with relief when I saw Mckenzie staring blankly at his paper. I wasn't the only one clueless.

"Okay, I think that was enough time." Without waiting for hands, Ms. Isola pointed to Mckenzie. "What did you write?"

Mckenzie smiled at the teacher. "I never got around to the actual writing. I was too busy planning."

"So what was your plan?" Ms. Isola's dark eyes sparkled in the light.

Mckenzie shrugged. "It depends on what the danger is. If my friend was stuck in a box, I would find a super-duper sharp sword and stab it open. If my friend was depressed, I would make him laugh."

Ms. Isola nodded. "Good point. Next time write it down. Lucia?"

Uh, oh. I looked down at my blank paper in embarrassment. The light blue lines blurred in my eyes and the red vertical streak mocked me. I looked back at my teacher. Her disappointed eyes looked down at me and her head shook with dismay. "Same with you, Lucia. Instead of daydreaming, write down your thoughts."

My cheeks burned and I felt like a train slammed into me. An awful pause followed my embarrassing moment. I could feel Isabelle's eyes boring into my head and I was sure my classmates were ready to laugh.

"Heimo, what did you write?"

The glances and the heat fluttered away and I breathed with relief. The attention was off me for now.

~~~

I looked around the cafeteria from the doorway. The boys took over the table on the far left, while the girls spread over the other three tables. Lots of space, even between two classes. I glanced behind me at the last few fifth graders buying their lunches at the silver counter. None of them I knew well.

"Lucia." I whirled back around to face Izet.

"Oh, hi," I said. I took a good look at him. He wore skinny jeans and an oversized gray shirt with "Buchtton" written on it in big letters. His eyes were bright and comforting. Maybe he hadn't heard about what I said to Avani.

"I heard about what you said to Avani." His eyes darkened. I avoided his gaze and looked past him at the boy's table. There was Pavel sitting beside Celio. We met eyes for a second and he waved. I looked away.

I must have blushed because Izet raised an eyebrow. "Is everything okay, Lucia?"

I nodded. "Everything is fine. Thank you very much." I hadn't meant to sound harsh and I felt worried I offended the boy.

Izet gave no signs of being wounded. He straightened his shirt. "I just want to make sure you're okay because I've noticed you've been by yourself during recess and lunch."

His concern surprised me. After he sided with Avani in November, I hadn't expected him to care about my welfare. I smiled and fiddled with my lunch box's strap. "I actually have been a little lonely. Would like to sit with me at lunch?" What was I thinking? This boy I barely knew would never want to sit with me.

"I would love to, but I promised Aziza I would sit with her. You're welcome to sit with us."

I looked at their table made of people like Summer and Kaya, the smart people who knew how to make and keep friends. "That's okay. Thank you."

"If you're sure ... See you...," Izet turned away and headed for Aziza and their group.

I hesitated for a moment before making my way to the second table. As I passed the first table, I could hear Avani's dreamy voice rising over the others and the recognizable sound of Isabelle laughing. Avani didn't sound as happy as I would've expected. I felt a pang of regret. Why did I say those things to Avani? I slid down on the corner seat farthest from my former friends. I had begun to unzip my bag when Amy slid in in front of me. Her loose bun bounced up and down as she moved. Surprise sparked in my chest.

"Hello," she said, smiling. "How are you?"

I smiled at her, grateful for her company. "Fine. You?" I was not expecting to be joined by someone, least of all Amy. I only knew her from school.

"I know how it feels to be lonely, so I decided I should give you company."

"Thank you." I wasn't sure what else to say. I hadn't had a direct conversation with Amy before.

"So what are you doing for February vacation?"

I had forgotten about the upcoming break. I shrugged. "Read, watch movies, sleep. You?"

"Same, but I'll probably work on my book. I'm writing a soccer book." Her eyes shone with pride.

"I can't wait to see it featured on Goodreads." How was I so comfortable talking to her?

"You know, Lucia, you need to talk to Avani. You can't avoid her forever."

I looked down at the table. Little crumbs left over from the grades before sprinkled the brown top. Amy's just trying to help. I swallowed hard before saying, "You're right, but Avani probably doesn't want me."

"You can believe that and you may be right, but I think you should still try."

I looked up and met Amy's gaze. From the way her bright blue eyes blazed with determination, I knew she meant it. I smiled. For some reason, I liked the girl.