Aa'yat's POV

She welcomed my question with a warm smile as she began.

Handling sexual urge before marriage.
If a person cannot marry soon after becoming sexually and mentally mature, then how should he or she handle sexual urge??? She asked with a smile as silenced filled everywhere.

We have three ways which are;
1) Immoral ways
2) Lawful temporary ways
And lastly marriage.

Firstly,
1) Immoral ways
A. Pre-Marital sex
         Pre-Marital sex is forbidden in Islam, no matter whether it is with a girlfriend or a prostitute. Pre-Marital sex is forbidden. (Zina).
It is also an irresponsible sexual behavior, there is no responsibility involved in such relationships. The most vulnerable person in such relationships is the woman.

I read on an Islamic blog once that;
A twenty-four year old lady wrote the following in a letter to Ann Landers;
...... The teenager said she knew lots of girls her age who had several partners ' just for the fun of it'. I found that odd because I was having sex at 16 and it was no fun at all. Sleeping with guys wasn't exciting or thrilling, it was degrading. It made me feel lonelier and emptier than ever. I also worried from month to month about being pregnant. That could be a real hell. I would love to tell all the young girls out there that teenage sex doesn't solve problems, it creates more. It doesn't make a girl feel loved, it makes her feel cheap. I'd let them know that it doesn't make a girl more of a woman but less of one.
Having said that,

Allah says;
     Do not go near adultery, surely it is an indecency, and an evil way of fulfilling sexual urge. (17:32)

Fornication and adultery have severely been condemned in the saying of the prophet and Imams.

Pre-Marital sex is a sin punishable by the Islamic court. If an unmarried man and an unmarried woman are found guilty of formication in an Islamic court, their punishment will be as the following:
  The woman and the man who fornicate scourge each of them a hundred whips; and let no tenderness of them seize you if you believe in God and the last day, and let a party of believers witness their punishment. (24:2)

If the unmarried man or woman commit fornication more than once, then they will be punished three times by hundred wipes, and if they are proven guilty for the fourth time, then they will be put to death.

(As for adultery, it's punishment is even severe because married persons have no excuse whatsoever, to commit adultery.
The shariah says that married persons guilty of adultery should be stoned to death.

Therefore, Pre-Marital sex is out of the question as s means of fulfilling sexual urge.

B) Masturbation.
     In Islamic terminology, masturbation (Istimna) means self-stimulation of the sexual organ till one achieves emission of semen or orgasm. Masturbation in form of self_stimulation is forbidden.
     "The believers are those who protect their sexual organs except from their spouses. Therefore, whosoever seeks more beyond that (In sexual gratification), then they are transgressors."
(23:5-6)

Masturbation is a sin for which a person can also be punished by the Islamic court. Of course, the nature of the punishment is upon the judge's discretion.

Once a person was caught masturbating and was brought to Imam 'Ali. The Imam punished him by beating his hands until it turned red, then he made arrangements for his marriage on government expenses.

These days some scientists are telling us that there is no harm in masturbation, rather it is a natural act. To prove that it is natural, they give examples of some wild animals, like monkeys. Actually they represent those who have gone to other extreme of sexual morality. They have degraded human being to the level of wild animals, and then justify their deeds by finding examples in the animal world. They are, in Quranic expression,
      "Like cattle, nay they are may astray; they are the heedless ones".
(7:179)

The irony is that when Muslims talk about following Islam which came just 1400 years ago, they are labelled as 'anti-progress' those who want to turn the clock backwards. And now these very people are going millions of years back and following the wild animals or the primitive societies to determine what is natural and what is not natural!
Subhanallah............
Masturbation is also out of options.

C) Homosexuality
One way of fulfilling the sexual urge which is now becoming acceptable in the western world is sexual relations between members of the same sex: homosexuality (which definition includes lesbianism). By saying that it is becoming acceptable in liberal societies I do not mean to say that homoseyis a 21st century phenomenon; no, not at all.

But there is a big difference between the past and the present: in the past, Homosexuality was considered a perverted sexual behavior whereas now it is being labeled as 'natural' and as a result of 'inborn tendency'!

It has been clearly condemned in the Bible and the Qur'an.
Explaining the details of the punishment, Allah says;
"So when our punishment came upon the people of lut, we turned the city upside down and showered them with stones of baked clay, one after another.
(11:82)

So we see that as far as the Qur'an is concerned, homosexuality is an "Indecency" and that Allah had destroyed a whole nation because of this indecent sexual behavior.

In the Islamic legal system, homosexuality is a punishable crime against the law of God.
"In the case of homosexuality between two males, the active partner is to be lashed a hundred times if he is unmarried and killed if he is married. Whereas the passive partner is to be killed regardless of his marital status."

In the case of two females (i.e lesbianism), the sinners are to be lashed a hundred times of they are unmarried and stoned to death if they are married.

Someone would want to ask why is Islam so severe in matters of fornication, homosexuality and lesbianism??
If the Islamic system had not allowed the gratification of the sexual urge by lawful means (without even associating guilt with it), then it would be right to say that Islam is very severe. But since it is allowed to be fulfilment of sexual instincts by lawful means, it is not prepared to tolerate any perverted behavior.

2) Lawful Temporary ways
If a Muslim cannot marry soon after puberty, then he or she just has two options: temporary abstinence or temporary marriage.

A) Temporary Abstinence.
  Islam has allowed marriage as soon as a person becomes physically mature , and it is also strongly recommends that at least during the early years of marriage to adopt a simple life-style so that the lack of paucity of financial resources does not obstruct a happy life.

But if a person decides, for whatever reason, not to marry soon after he or she physically mature, then the only way is to adopt temporary abstinence.
After strongly recommending the marriage of single people, the Qur'an says,
"And those who cannot marry should practice restrain or Abstinence till Allah enriches them out of His bounty." (24:33).

However, Abstinence from all the forbidden ways of fulfilling the sexual urge is not easy.
Therefore, a few guidelines would not be out of place.
Once a man came to the prophet and said,"I do not have the financial ability to marry, therefore I have come to complain about my singleness.

The prophet advised him how to control his sexual urge by saying, "leave the hair of your body and fast continuously". By saying that "leave the hair of your body", the prophet is asking not to remove the hair which grows on pubic area, chest etc, by sharing or using lotion/wax, rather one should just trim the hair.

This Hadith is indicating that removing the excessive hair increases one's sexual urge. ( Probably, that is why the shariah has recommended the men to shave the excessive hair every forty days, and the women to remove the excessive hair by lotion of cream every twenty days).

In retrospect, it means that not removing the hair will decrease the sexual desire and help the person in abstinence.

Imam 'Ali says;
     "Whenever a person's hair increases, his sexual desires have also decreased."

The other method of decreasing the sexual urge is fasting. It is obvious that one of the greatest benefits of fasting is the strengthening of one's will power. And no doubt, abstinence in the sexual context mostly depends on the will-power of the person. So fasting will strengthen the will power of the person and make it easier for him or her to restrain the sexual feelings.

B) Temporary marriage (Mut'a)
If a person does not marry soon after maturing and finds it difficult to control his or her sexual desire, than the only way to fulfil the sexual desire is Mut'a.

Marriage is of two types: da'im (permanent) and Munqati (temporary). The Munqati is also known as Mut'a.

The main difference between the two types of marriage is that in permanent, Islam has clearly defined the duties and obligations between the spouses. For example, it is the duty of the husband to provide the basic necessities of live for his wife and the wife is expected to not refuse sexual relationships without any religious or medical reason.

But in temporary marriage, Islam has given the prospective spouses the right of working out their own duties and expectations plans. For example, husband is not obliged to maintain his wife unless it has been so stipulated in the marriage contract. Likewise, the wife can put a condition in the marriage contract that there will be no sexual relations. Such conditions are invalid in a permanent married but allowed in temporary marriage.

I cannot overemphasize the Temporary marriage of Mut'a. The message of Islam is quite clear; Marry on permanent basis, if that is not possible, only then use the Mut'a marriage.

And Lastly, Marriage which is the best solution of all. She concluded.

And with that, my question has been answered.

We chorused the Takbeer as we all smiled in satisfaction.

Jazakillahu khair sis. We added.

Finally, I have a response for habiba. I smiled happily within me as the other sisters asked their questions.

We rounded up an hour later and headed back to our various rooms.

I typed my response to habiba as I waited for her reply. She already left me a message saying she wouldn't be attending the class later and I should fill in for her.

What is she up to now? I sighed.

____________________________________

After Juma'at prayer, I thought of changing my outfit to one of my favorite Abayas but hesitated. I received a lot of comments today regarding how beautiful I looked on hijab.

I can't let it go this way, Junaid has to see it. I thought.

I went to the class alone as I always did whenever Habiba was absent.

By Allah, I could sense their gazes fixed on me filled with surprise and amazement. I could even hear some underground comments as I walked past my way.

I got somewhere to sit and closely eye scanned for Junaid as I sat but all to no avail.
The class was super filled and it wouldn't be easy.
It's tests period what was I expecting.

I saw Inayat and Sabeerah siting close to each other and I smiled.
Sabeerah whispered a "you look so beautiful" and I blushed.

Inayat gestured for me to come sit close to them but I was too late. Just as I stood, a lady already filled in.

We chuckled in defeat as we just kept to our various seats.

The class began minutes later and ended around 4pm. It was Boty 327 ( Bryophyta, pteridophyta and Gymnospermae).

We all stormed out and as usual, I waited for Junaid outside the department.

Mansur came out first and Ma sha Allah, he looked so dashing that I almost drooled.
Never noticed he was as cute as that. I guess I have always had my gaze fixed on Junaid that was why.

We said our salaams and of course, he also commented on my looks.
Ma Sha Allah Aa'yat, you look so pretty. He complimented as he turned his gaze almost immediately.

Just as I wanted asking where Junaid was, he came approaching in a Royal blue kaftan.
Tabarakallah... How could I be the only one whose gaze is so fixed on him???
What am I saying, I am sure every single lady in that department must also be crushing on him.
But he is mine!!! My subconscious assured.

I kept staring at him as he walked his way through his gaze fixed slightly low as he walked.

He met with Mansur steps away from me not noticing I was the one standing almost beside them.

Junaid! I called as he turned to look at me. I can swear he was caught off guard and he wasn't expecting to see me that way.

Aa'yat, waw Ma Sha Allah... I am just speechless. He finally mustered the courage to say.

Mansur walked forward as usual as we walked steps behind.

So what's up with the new look?
Less I forget, you look so cute Aa'yat, I told you hijab was going to suit you better. He smiled

Thank you. I smiled as I tried to keep up with his steps.

I decided to join the Islamiyah and Haddah session at out hostel masjid, I mean not yet, but I am willing to. I said

That is so nice sis, I am happy for you. He smiled in response

We walked silently for a while and I broke the silence as I asked.
Junaid, Do you like my new look?

Of course. He nodded in response.

Then let's just get married. Will you marry me? I asked jokingly.

He laughed so hard that he almost choked on his saliva. This is the first time I have seen him that way, my joke must have been so funny.

What? Marry you? He asked with a smile.

Yes, is there anything wrong with that? I queried in suspense.

No, nothing. You just reminded me of someone. He said out.

And who is that??? I asked.

My twin. He answered calmly.

Are you a twin??? OMG! I asked shockingly as he kept mute.

See you next time Allah's willing❤️💕😍

Yhu_so_shy