Enrique wanted us to have lunch at Orient Café again. I knew it wasn't the best idea, but I accepted. We hadn't brought up the almost kiss, and it was time we talked about it. I couldn't lead him on, and I had to set some boundaries with him.

        The car ride there was in silence, and when we were seated at the small restaurant, more silence ensued.

        "Okay," I started, "we need to talk."

        "I agree," he said while bringing the spoon down from eating his egg drop soup.

        "Enrique," I said, "I know about our history and all, but you can't go around trying to kiss me. I have a partner. One who I love and am loyal to."

        I should have told Gyan about what happened, but at the same time, there was nothing to worry about. I was dealing with the situation. I didn't need him freaking out over nothing.

        "I don't regret it," Enrique said to my shock. "I'll try to kiss you again if I could."

        "Enrique..."

        "I know you're taken," he said. "I know I should respect that, but I can't. I can't respect a toxic relationship, and I can't respect a toxic man like Gyan."

        I narrowed my eyes. "Excuse me?"

        Toxic?

        "You heard me," he said. "Your relationship and partner are both toxic."

        "You know nothing," I said, "not about Gyan or our relationship."

        He had no right. He didn't know all that we'd been through. He only saw the tip of the iceberg with us.

        "You deserve better than Gyan," Enrique said. "He's marrying a woman, for God's sake."

        "He's going to call it off."

        "When?" he asked. "Haven't you and him been singing that same song for months now? But nothing's happening. I bet he'll tell you that he'll call it off the day of the wedding."

        "This is ridiculous."

        "You know it's true," Enrique said. "It doesn't matter if he's with you. It doesn't matter if you're the one he loves. The world doesn't know that. His family doesn't know that, and they matter. He obviously doesn't love you enough to claim you. To tell the world that you're the one he loves. He doesn't love you enough to stand up to his father."

        "I never should have told you any of this."

        Our food arrived, but neither one of us paid it any attention, focusing on each other.

        "I'm glad you did." He pushed his soup to the side. "He's not calling off the wedding. Deep down, you and him both know that. He doesn't have the guts."

        I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.

        What could I say?

        "You're going to remain on the side," he went on. "Who knows how long? Years, maybe? Do you want to stay unmarried for the rest of your life? Choosing to be the man who Gyan runs to when he wants to get away from his wife. He wants to have his cake and eat it, too. Having the wife the world can see who'll please his father while having you to go back to. He wins in this situation while you lose."

        "Who'll want this?" I asked. "Who'll want to live a lie?"

        "Gyan."

        "How's that winning?"

        "You'll be surprised," Enrique said. "Not everyone is out and proud like you. I wouldn't want to come out to Gyan's father either from what you've told me. Maybe a part of him does love you, Gabriel, but he also loves his father. Do you really think he has it in him to risk losing his dad? The man who's been there before he knew you existed? You left him for more than five years."

        "Stop."

        "You've proven to him you can be unreliable."

        "That's not true."

        "I'm not saying it is," he said. "But he may think so. You left him once. What's to stop you from doing it again? Why would he risk it all for something that isn't guaranteed?"

        "For him," I said. "He should do it for himself, not me."

        "You'll be surprised how long some people will stay in the closet."

        Marry an Indian woman. Have some kids, with a gay lover or two on the side.

        Gyan's words.

        "People like Gyan wouldn't mind living a lie," he continued. "The only reason he may confess is because of you. Until he wants to do it for himself, he probably won't. He's just stringing you along."

        "You don't know what you're talking about."

        "I'm speaking the truth," he said with a sad smile. "I know I'm being an ass for being honest, but you have to hear it. Someone has to tell you. Gyan isn't good for you. All he does is bring drama. Since you've been back, what's happened?"

        Drama.

        "Life is dramatic."

        "Especially when Gyan is involved," Enrique said. "I don't come with that. I'm a simple guy, just like you. Me and you have more in common than you and Gyan ever could."

        "We work," I told him. "Gyan and I have worked for four years."

        "Stop bringing up the past," he said. "It's the past. It isn't the present, and it definitely isn't the future. You've both changed, and you're grown men now. Does it work now?"

        "I love him."

        "Just because you love someone doesn't mean you should be with them," he said. "Abuse victims love their abusers."

        "Gyan isn't abusing me."

        "Not the point," he said. "There's this rhetoric of following your heart, but sometimes, your heart is wrong. You need a person like me, not him. Me and you actually work."

        "You need someone who loves you," I said, "only you."

        "What makes you think you won't be able to love me, too?"

        "I love Gyan," I repeated. "I care about you. I think you're an attractive bloke, and you're a wonderful person."

        "Gyan is the only thing holding you back right now," he said. "There's no other reason for us not to be together. I'm not in the closet. I don't come with the drama. Gyan doesn't get you like I do. You'll be so much happier with me."

        Gyan and I could be happier.

        In a world with no Anushka. One without his father's bigotry or Gyan's fear of coming out.

        We had the potential for that happiness.

        "You know you will," he finished off. "You deserve what you put up with, and I want you to deserve more."

        "You are being an ass," I said. "This isn't like you."

        "I'm tired of holding my tongue," he said. "Call me an ass. Hate me for a little bit, but you need to know the truth. You need to hear it. Someone has to be honest with you, no matter how much it hurts."

        It did hurt. Gyan gave me so much joy, but then there was the pain. No one could hurt me the way he could. And he'd hurt me. But I'd hurt him, too.

        Maybe I was the problem, too.

        "We used to work," I said. "We weren't perfect, but it was real. It made sense, and it worked."

        Enrique reached for my hand on the table. "I know. Just think about it. Do you want this?"

        "It's not all about what I want."

        "It's all about Gyan." He chuckled humorlessly. "That's what pisses me off. It's always about Gyan. You can't keep pushing this off. The wedding is coming. It doesn't matter if you don't want it to."

        That photo shoot was awful. Seeing their families and Gyan and Anushka together. I'd never seen them interact before, but when they talked, they were at ease with each other. Gyan was gay, and I had no reason to be jealous. At the same time, she was his fiancé.

        Not me.

        That photo shoot was the final thing I needed to realize the truth. I would never fit into Gyan's world. It didn't matter how much we both wanted me to.

        I fit in Enrique's. It was natural. It was easy. There was no drama or hurt. Being with him made sense.

        Sometimes, Gyan and I didn't.

        "I'm sorry for being harsh," he said, "but I can't see this ending well for you. It's better to cut your losses now and spare yourself the hurt."

        "He could call it off."

        "But will he?" he asked. "You've been waiting for months now."

        "He came out to his sister."

        "His sister isn't his dad," Enrique pointed out.

        "It's something."

        Enrique sighed. "I'm going to give you a choice. We can't keep doing this, and I need to know. I want you to look deep within yourself and think about what you need. Tonight, I want you to meet me at the soccer field in Shirley Town Center, around seven. I want to know if you'll stick to what you know or what's best for you. I'll be waiting at the field, and if you come, I'll know you'll be willing to give me a chance. We can go slow and figure things out as we go, but at least, you'll be free from Gyan."

        "Enrique."

        "Let me finish," he interjected. "If you don't come, I'll know you're choosing him. You're choosing him again, even though he isn't choosing you. If you choose him, I'm done."

        I grabbed my head in my hands, resting my elbows on the table. "Don't do this to me."

        "You have to make choices in life," he said. "Some good, some bad. Either way, we have to live with them. Whatever you choose, you'll have to deal with it."

        Everything he said was true. I didn't want to admit it, but it was. There was drama, pain and a whole lot of nonsense when it came to Gyan. I knew this in my head, but my heart wouldn't let me entertain it. My heart was with a man who was someone else's.

        "Gyan is just a spoiled kid who's in the closet and too much of a coward to stand up to his father," Enrique said. "If you want to deal with that for the rest of your life, that's your call. Or you can give me a chance. Give me a chance to show you what you can have. What it's like to be with someone without it feeling like some dirty secret. Having someone be proud of you and your relationship. Someone who wouldn't mind the whole world knowing. I can be yours completely." I met his gaze. "Can Gyan be yours?"

        I didn't know. I should have, but I didn't. That was the problem.

        I stood up. "I have to go."

        He stood up as well. "Let's head out together."

        We didn't even touch our food. "No," I said. "I'll get an Uber. I need some space."

        "Gyan should really get you a car," he said before I could turn to leave. "That's one thing he's good for." We maintained eye contact. "Money."

        I needed to get out of here. "See you at work. I'll Venmo you for the food."

        I hurried out, appreciating the outside air once I walked out. I got my Uber, needing to get away from here as fast as possible. When the Uber passed by Shirley Town Center, that was when I remembered what Enrique said. It pissed me off that he was giving me an ultimatum, but at the same time, I needed to figure things out. Time was running out, and I couldn't keep pretending things weren't coming up.

        The rest of work was spent with Enrique and I keeping our distance. Well, I did. I needed to think about all of this. Even when I entered the flat later, there was no clarity. Gyan walked out of the hall in his swim trunks.

        "Hey." He kissed me, but I pulled away after a second. He frowned. "What's wrong?"

        "Heading for a swim?"

        He grabbed my arm when I was about to walk away. "What's going on with you?"

        We faced each other. "What do you mean?"

        He slit his eyes. "You've been weird lately."

        I scoffed. "You noticed. You actually care."

        "What the hell's that supposed to mean?"

        "Exactly what it means." I took a step forward. "I felt like a stranger in your house. Then again, I don't know if I've ever belonged."

        He released a breath. "It's about the photo shoot."

        "Not only that," I made sure to clarify. "You were too busy talking to Anushka and pleasing your dad."

        "I brought you with me," he said. "If it was up to my dad, you wouldn't have been there."

        "Maybe, I shouldn't have gone at all," I said. "What's the point of doing things halfway? You bring me to your house, but you don't take a picture with me. You say you love you, and you're with me in every way possible. Then you're engaged to a woman."

        His features relaxed. "It's about this again."

        "What are you waiting for?" I asked. "I've been so patient, Gyan, but I don't know how long I can wait."

        "You don't know how much is on the line." He rubbed his forehead. "It's not just me. It's my dad, too."

        I threw my arms up. "Of course, it is. It's all about your dad. You're weak when it comes to him."

        He glared at me. "Okay, you need to calm this shit down."

        "I'm not calming anything," I stood my ground. "When are you going to call off this wedding? At your sangeet ceremony? At the alter in front of everyone? Maybe, on your honeymoon. Are you going to call it off, at all? I don't know anymore, Gyan."

        "I have to come out to my dad," he said. "You don't get it. I have to risk everything with him."

        "I get it."

        "No, you don't!" he hollered. "You keep saying you do when you don't know shit!"

        I flinched. "I'm trying to. You don't know how patient I'm being, Gyan."

       "You may think I'm a coward," he said, "but I don't give a damn. This is my life. My reality. You think I'm so privileged compared to you. Maybe, I am, but there's shit I have to deal with that you'll never have to worry about."

        "He's your dad," I said. "I hate that I feel like I'm competing with your dad, and I'm losing to him."

        "Stop seeing it like that."

        "He's your dad!" I yelled. "How can I win?!"

        "This isn't a competition," he said just as loudly.

        "It feels like it is," I said, "and I'm the loser. I'm losing to your dad. I'm losing to Anushka." I pressed my lips together to stop myself from crying. "I'm losing you."

        His eyes softened. "You're not."

        "You're not going to call off the wedding," I stated.

        "I will."

        "You're not coming out to your dad any time soon," I said.

        "You're just assuming shit now."

        "It's the truth," I said. "I've been in denial, but it's true. This isn't going to end well for us."

        We may not work anymore.

        "Gabriel," he said while grabbing my arms. "Stop this. Take a breath and calm down."

        He didn't see it. To him, this would work out. His ignorance was scarier than the truth. How could he fix something he wasn't aware of?

        "Go swim." I removed myself from his grasp. "We need some space from each other."

        "Gabriel, come on."

        "Go!"

        He hesitated, but he grabbed his stuff and walked out the door. I sat at the island, running my hand through my hair as my mind raced. The Steven incident distracted me from the whole wedding situation. Now, it was at the forefront of my mind, and I couldn't feel at ease if I wanted to.

        After an hour, fifteen minutes before seven, I got an Uber. I had to make a decision, and I couldn't do it here. Gyan was back, but he was in his room, us not talking since he left for a swim. I needed more space.

        With that, I walked out of the flat, heading for my Uber.

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* What do you guys think about that ending? I'm so excited for the next couple chapters. Gyan and Gabriel are in for it.