𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗠𝗜𝗖𝗞𝗘𝗬 𝗠𝗢𝗨𝗦𝗘 𝗖𝗟𝗨𝗕𝗛𝗢𝗨𝗦𝗘!

skeeter – goofy
chris – mickey
scott – donald
bambi - minnie 

mickey sent a photo! 

goofy
she's so cute 🥰

donald 
chris, you married up, buddy 

mickey 
i know 😩

sometimes i cry myself to sleep just by the thought that i'm married to HER

goofy
she's cute but wtf is that hoodie? 

mickey
hey that's MY hoodie!!!

goofy
both of you are worth millions and you couldn't get a hoodie that didn't have holes?? 🤔

minnie
it's chris' COMFY hoodie

donald
jesus christ i keep forgetting she's an evans now 

well,, WELCOME TO THE FAMILY BAMBI GRAY-EVANS 

mickey

brb i need to compose myself because me and my WIFE need to get some lunch 

donald
is that a euphemism 

minnie
what 

goofy
doN'T SCARE HER AWAY, SCOTT!! 

donald
no worries bambi practically sees me as her brother 🤭

minnie
i've always wanted siblings!!!! 

mickey 
yeah but u don't want scott and skeeter as siblings, hon, trust me 

goofy
pardon?

i think that turks and caicos heat might be damaging your brain or something christopher 

minnie
did u know chris got really bad sunburn because he was too excited to jump into the beach

donald
*sighs* disappointed but not surprised 

mickey
i needed some fUN IN THE SUN 

goofy
ew

mickey
not a euphemism!! 

minnie 
is this groupchat just full of dirty jokes or something

donald
no 

goofy
yes 

minnie
. . .and "fun in the sun" is supposedly a euphemism?

WEAK 

i've heard worse from christopher 

mickey
i saved all my dirtiest jokes for you, honey 😚

minnie

══════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ══════

The two sat in comfortable silence as they stared at the menu of the lavish restaurant. When Chris and Bambi went out, they took advantage of their hefty bank accont and always looked for a restaurant that had strict rules about taking pictures of guests along with exclusive membership. Not everyone had that type of privilege but  ─ to be fair ─ not everyone was getting constantly hounded by the paparazzi or had people dig their noses into their relationship. 

"Can we get the chocolate cake?" Chris queried, eyes darting over to hers. 

Bambi clicked her tongue. "It's lunch, babe, not dessert." 

"Chocolate cake it is!"

"You're going to get sick."

"We're going to get sick. You are helping me finish it, right?" 

"Nah. You're on your own for this one, buddy."

Before he could reply, their waitress arrived ─ smiling and bouncing on the tip of her toes. Eventually, Chris decided to get a proper meal with a promise of something for his sweet tooth. 

The waitress turned to Bambi and said, "You look like an American singer." 

All Bambi could do was smile sweetly at her as she left with their orders. 

"That was bold of her." Chris said, his hand finding it's place on her thigh. 

Bambi chuckled, propping her elbow on the table, chin in the palm of her hand. "I can't help it if I'm popular." She ran her fingers through his brown hair, "In our three years, you never told me your favorite song."

"It's Bad Blood."

"Shut up!" 

Their laughter was interrupted by the incessant vibration of Bambi's phone perched on the table. Chris grumbled and muttered how he would have to throw that thing away if the notification was another exclusive about their relationship. He honestly was just flattered that she wrote songs about him and their relationship because those were the facts ─ not those splayed on every entertainment channel. 

When he saw that the color from her face had drained, Chris nudged his foot with hers. "Hey, honey, is everything alright?"

Bambi gulped and ran her hands over her face. She timidly placed her phone back to the table and turned to face him, evident fear in her eyes. "Scooter Braun just bought Big Machine Records." When he remained quiet, she continued. "That means one of the people who were assholes to me own my work which are basically songs I've written on the floor of my bedroom. I just ─ this is ─ "

His hand left her thigh found it's way to her back, running up and down in smoothing motions. "Hey, hey. Breathe, Bams."

"I just ─ I don't know what to say. No one told me about this."

"Can't you buy your masters?" 

Bambi shrugged, laying her head on his shoulder. "I don't know. I have to schedule a meeting with Tree and. . .can we just enjoy our lunch?"

"Are you sure? We can always order room service."

She smiled and leaned over to kiss his cheek, soothing her fingers over the scruffy beard. "Yes, yes. It's our honeymoon. Let's ─ uh ─ talk about your movie or something. Tell me who becomes Captain America." 

"No."

"Chris!"