I was almost in tears by the time Jake returned. From my facial expression I think he could tell that my water just broke. His eyes widened and he rushed to my side.

"Hey, hey, hey. It's okay, breathe. Focus on your breathing, I'll do it with you." He grabbed my hand and urged me to breathe.

He kissed my forehead and told me that I was doing great. I let out a hard breath as the contraction passed.

They were becoming too frequent and really hard for me to talk through. He helped me to change out of my wet skirt and underwear, giving me a fresh pair and a maxi pad. I changed into a black dress as he cleaned up the couch.

I got through my most ferocious contraction and knew it was time.

"Hospital. Now." I spoke. Jake nodded and rushed upstairs to tell my brothers and grab my hospital bag. Courtnee came down with my phone charger and some essentials.

It took almost 15 minutes to get me out of the house and into the car. My contractions hurt so bad and it was like every movement I made caused them to hurt more.

"Call Reuben please. Tell him what's going on." I gave Jake my phone.

I listened as Jake told him and watched him screw up his face.

"What about 'she's in labour' do you not understand bruv? She wants you there." He said.

He turned to me and it was clear that he was fuming. "He said he's at work."

"Give me the phone." I didn't have any patience.

"Reuben I'm in labour!"

"I'm at work, Shanae."

"This is your child you know! You did this to me; you got me pregnant! I want you there for the birth of our child, Reuben. I need you there." I was so frustrated I was almost in tears.

"You've got that faggot with you, clearly you don't need shit from me."

"What?" I honestly didn't know what to say.

"Even after I told you to stop talking to him, you still did and you still are. Don't come to me with that 'you need me' bullshit. You've got a different man now. So you know what, do it without me." He hung up.

I sat with my phone to my ear, shocked by his words.

"Shanae?" Jake looked at me. I dropped the phone in my lap and just burst into tears.

"He's not coming." I sobbed. Neither Courtnee or Jake knew what to say.

I know Reuben and I weren't together but I still wanted him there. This was the birth of his first child, my first child. This was a special moment in both our lives but he didn't want to be apart of it. He'd rather be at 'work' than be there for the birth of his child. Like seriously. What an arse.

I felt like it had taken us 2 hours to get to the hospital. There had been a crazy accident so roads were blocked off and the traffic was absolutely insane. I tried to ignore what I was feeling but I couldn't deny it any longer.

"The baby's coming!" I hadn't pushed at all, I just let my body do the work but I could feel the baby getting lower.

Courtnee and Jake shared a worried glance while I sat there trying to get my breathing under control.

I really wasn't trying to give birth in his car. We were at the hospital but I felt like I couldn't stand up, the pain I was in was so great. I groaned as another contraction started. My door was open and Courtnee and Jake were out but I couldn't get up.

"You need to get out of the car babes." Jake undid my seatbelt as Courtnee rushed into the hospital to get help.

"I can't." I cried.

"Yes, you can." His tone was firm yet calm and reassuring. I nodded and forced myself out. I leaned on him when I got out and felt I needed to sit back down again. Luckily, a nurse was right behind me with a wheelchair.

I was being wheeled down a corridor when I felt it. I swung my leg over the arm of the wheelchair.

"He's coming out!" I exclaimed.

"No, don't push." The young nurse spoke with a heavy polish accent.

"I'm not but he's coming!"

"You have to wait till we get to the delivery room." Courtnee rubbed my shoulder.

"My body can't wait!" I declared.

"He's right there, I swear he's right there." I ripped off my underwear and groaned as another contraction began to claim my body.

I wasn't paying much attention and didn't realise we had made it to the delivery room. I climbed onto the bed and yelped as I pushed slightly. I couldn't stop myself. My body was just telling me to. The ring of fire I had been told about was no joke. I hitched my dress up and felt between my legs. His head was out.

"Oh no!" I sat back and pushed hard as the next contraction started. I screamed. It was like he flew out. As soon as he was out, I picked him up and put him on my chest. They didn't even get a chance to put my IV in or monitor me before he was out.

He was so small. The nurse was moving around the room frantically, I think this was her first birth.

He began to cry and I did too as realisation set in. I had just given birth.

"Definitely a boy." Jake spoke. I looked up at him and Courtnee. They both had tears in their eyes. He kissed my forehead.

"You did so well." He whispered, stroking my head with his thumb.

"Yeah, Shanae. You were fantastic." Courtnee approached the bed to get a closer look.

The nurse returned with a blanket and a midwife also came in with some other things. I didn't pay much attention. I was mesmerised by my little boy. I allowed the nurse to clean my baby a little but didn't allow her to scrub off the vernix. She handed him back to me before asking if Jake wanted to cut the cord.

We waited for a little over 5 minutes; not just so the blood would stop pumping but because I wanted to give Reuben a chance to get here if he wanted. He was the father so it was only right that he cut the cord. Courtnee did call him to tell him I had the baby so I knew he didn't really have an excuse to not come.

He didn't show and I allowed Jake to cut it. I loved my son. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever set my eyes on.

Midwives checked the baby, weighing and measuring him before putting a nappy on him and the clothes I had brought which consisted of a onesie, mittens and a hat. They gave him to Jake as I delivered the placenta.

I was ecstatic. He was perfectly healthy despite what I had been through in my pregnancy.

Courtnee and Jake hadn't spent long holding him before I wanted him back.

I stroked his tiny hand as I cradled him to my chest. I remembered my midwife telling me previously that the first time I held my baby would be a good time to start breastfeeding, so that's what I did.

"What's his name?" Courtnee asked. I thought for a second.

"Malachi. Malachi TJ Suarez." I smiled.

"Aww that's cute." She cooed.

"Where does the TJ come from?"

"Well, they are the initials for two people I hold close to my heart."

"That's sweet."

"Yeah. It's Trey. And you." I looked up at him.

"You named him after me?" His eyes were wide.

"It wouldn't feel right if I didn't."

"Come here." He hugged me the best he could while I was nursing TJ.

The boys came in soon after and took turns holding Malachi after he was done eating. I had never seen them be so gentle before, especially because they were so big.

"Sam, I can't believe you did this." Sean commented.

"Word. No painkillers or anything." Trey agreed. I giggled. Painkillers.

It was around 21:15 and I has just finished feeding TJ again. I handed him to Jake and tried to get some sleep while he drifted off, as the midwives suggested.

I could hear Jake speaking to TJ quietly and the slight noise was soothing to my ears, helping me to drift off.

"Get your hands off my fucking baby." His voice woke me right up. Jake was sitting in the rocking chair with TJ.

"Reuben." I whispered. I didn't even want him here anymore. He missed everything. He wasn't there for me at all, he wasn't there for his son.

Seeing him just made me so angry. I hadn't seen him since I was about 3 months pregnant I think. I can't remember, pregnancy brain made me forgetful. I didn't feel the same towards him anymore, especially after today.

He didn't even look the same to me anymore. What was once a beauty I thought I was lucky to have was now nothing. He was nothing.

"Why is he holding my kid? That's my fucking kid." His voice was loud.

"Shut up! You're going to wake him up." I scolded as quietly as I could.

"We had a boy? Oh my days, come here junior." He had his arms out in front of him, waiting for Jake to pass him over.

Jake looked at me for confirmation but I shook my head.

"Why are you shaking your head? I want to hold Junior."

"He's not your junior."

"What do you mean?"

"Be quiet, you'll wake him-"

"Nah, I'll be as loud as I fucking want. Why isn't he my junior?" He raised his voice. I could see Malachi start to wake up.

"I didn't name him after you, sit down and be quiet." He was pissing me off. He hovered over Jake and I told Jake to bring TJ to me.

I felt better once I had TJ in my arms.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why didn't you give him my name?" He asked. I screwed him.

"Don't you ever ask me that. You know why." I cut my eyes at him.

"I'm baffled."

"Don't act clueless, Reuben, don't you dare. You know exactly why. I don't want to have this conversation right now, I'll end up swearing and shouting and I don't want to do that around him." My eyes began to tear up.

I wasn't going to name my son after a father who has done nothing for him. He hadn't bought him anything, didn't check up on me to see if I was alright. He didn't ask me if I needed anything. He chose drugs and money over the birth of his child, over me. What father in their right mind would ever do that? My child didn't deserve to be named after that low life.

I could never forgive him for that. I needed him and he wasn't there.

"Baby-"

"Don't 'baby' me. Everytime you do something wrong you expect me to forgive you. Stop doing that. The day for me to forgive you has long gone. This is your son we're talking about, not just me. And he deserves better than what you're offering. My son doesn't come second place to money or drugs. He has got to be your priority, he's certainly mine. If you weren't going to do anything for him I would have given him up for adoption to make sure he has both parents in his life. I thought we were going to be a family unit but boy was I wrong. If you can't be here for the first hurdle how can I expect you to be there for the rest? You know what, talk to me another time. I'm too busy looking after the child you refuse to be a father to. Goodnight." I wiped my eyes.

"Baby girl-"

"Goodnight Reuben." My tone was harsher.

I never took my eyes off of my son. I was doing this for him. Reuben needed to know that his son comes first; always.

Sooo there's the second upload. Why did I cry writing this plz lolol. I swear Reuben just angers me soooo much. Anywaz, I apologise again for the super long wait. I might even upload again in the next week, you never know...

Love Samantha
Xxx