RECAP:

"Give me another chance to make things right between us. Our friendship means the world to me." He muzzled into my neck.

"Evidently it doesn't."

"It does Shanae, it does. You mean so much to me, I can't bare to lose you." He spoke into my neck.

"You can't lose something you never had right?" I swallowed. He let out a sob.

"Don't do this."

"I have to."

"No."

"Tashard, get off me." I struggled to pull his arms from around me.

"Tashard." I tried again, successful this time. I made the mistake of looking at his face and it's like my heart shattered. He was absolutely broken. His face was wet with tears, his eyes full of regret and his expression showing a great deal of pain.

I felt my eyes get teary again and I looked down.

"You're crying because you know we're meant to be friends." He held my hands. I shook my head.

"No. I'm crying because I see what you've become. And I don't want that. Please leave." I tore my hands from his and wiped my tears.

"Don't do this."

"Please leave."

"I need you."

"But I don't need you. Get out." I spoke more harshly.

"This is crazy, we're meant to be friends."

"Tashard, please." I stared at him. God, I missed this fool. He stared back, looking down at my belly for a while before nodding.

"Can I at least get a proper hug?" His eyes searched mine. I nodded. He opened his arms for me and I wrapped my arms around him. He pulled me close and sighed.

"I'm sorry it had to come to this." I whispered. We hugged for a long time before he let me go. I allowed him to fix himself before walking him to the door.

"I really do regret what I did and said Shanae. I would take it back in a heartbeat if I could." He looked down at me. I just nodded.

"Goodbye Tashard." I whispered, closing the door as he stepped out.

END OF RECAP

I hadn't been feeling good since the other day when Tashard came to see me. Him suddenly popping up after I hadn't seen him since the beginning of my pregnancy had stressed me out.

I had been super moody the past couple of days and the pain I was feeling the day Tashard came to visit had intensified.

"Bye, Sam. See you after work." Trey poked his head in my bedroom. I glared at him.

"Don't say bye, just go!" I snapped.

"Okay, fine." He turned to leave.

"What? So you're gonna leave without saying bye?"

"You just said-"

"Bye, Trey." I rolled my eyes and turned around.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked.

"What's wrong with you?" I retorted turning back to face him. He stared at me confused before closing my door.

I was meant to be going out with Jake and Courtnee today but I really wasn't feeling up for it. The baby was being super active lately, last night especially so I didn't get a good night's sleep and I was beyond exhausted. It was 7:30 so I should have been getting ready but I decided to have a lie in instead. I was sure Jake and Courtnee would understand.

When I woke up again, Jake and Courtnee were in my room getting out clothes from my wardrobe. I stared at them as they argued about what I would wear. I groaned as I lay on my back gaining their attention. Courtnee smiled at me brightly.

"Hey girl! I hope you're excited for today. Jake and I were just sorting you an outfit."

It had been a little while since I had seen Courtnee and I missed her loads.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"12:15." Jake replied.

"We thought we'd let you sleep a bit more. You looked so peaceful." Jake laughed.

"Thanks." I smiled.

I helped them get me an outfit. We settled on a floral pleated chiffon maxi skirt, a coral bodysuit and black sandals. I allowed Jake to help me get out of bed before I went to go and shower.

I used the toilet and brushed my teeth. As I was in the shower I noticed that the heat from the water was alleviating some of the pain I had been feeling, causing me to stay in there for longer. There was a knock on the bathroom door before it opened slowly.

"Are you alright?" Courtnee asked.

"Yeah, I'm good." I replied.

"Are you sure? You've been in there for nearly half an hour." Damn. I didn't realise I had taken that long.

"I'm nearly done. I'll be out soon." I called, turning the water off.

I creamed my body and got dressed then made my way downstairs.

"Aww you look so cute." Courtnee cooed as I entered the living room. I gave her a small smile and she stood up and hugged me. We were running late so I ate a little bit of toast and had some apple juice. I grabbed my small navy satchel placing in all of my essentials.

"Are you okay?" Jake asked, placing his hand on my lower back.

"Yeah I'm fine." I nodded, ignoring the cramp-like pains.

"You don't seem fine."

"I am. Really." I persisted.

"Let's just go." I opened the front door.

We left the house and made our way to Jake's car.

I sat in the front passenger seat and Jake put my seatbelt on for me.

"Thanks." I whispered. He looked at me.

"Are you sure you're okay? If you don't feel like going out, we don't have to. We could get takeaway or something." He suggested.

"No, I want us to go out." I sighed.

He drove us to Nando's in Colliers Wood where his friend worked.

"Ay Ricky!" He greeted the olive skinned guy walking towards us. Ricky smiled wide and they bumped fists and hugged.

"Who are these lovely ladies?" Ricky glanced at us.

"This is Shanae, this is Courtnee, my friends. Girls this is Ricky." He introduced us. I smiled and waved politely.

"Jake, you didn't say he was hot." Courtnee spoke, twirling a piece of hair in her fingers. I looked up at her astounded.

"Oh my gosh." I muttered. She was such a flirt. He escorted us to a booth on the side of the restaurant.

"So what have you been up to lately? It's been a long time since I've seen you, mate." He spoke to Jake. I sat and watched them talk to each other. I sighed and looked around the restaurant. My eyes landed on this small family of three. I watched as the father played with his son and the mother took pictures. They looked so happy. I wished I could have a family like that but I knew Reuben was too much trouble. It could never work with the way Reuben was.

"Shanae." Courtnee nudged me.

"Hm?" I faced her.

"Are you alright? You seem kinda upset."

"I'm cool." I nodded.

"Shanae."

"What?"

"You're lying."

"I'm not. I'm fine."

"Shanae."

"Please stop." I felt my eyes water and kissed my teeth. I hated how emotional this pregnancy had made me.

"What's wrong?" She exclaimed. Jake looked at me.

"Excuse us." He stood up, grabbed my hand and walked us outside the restaurant.

We sat in the back of his car in silence for a few seconds.

"Talk to me." He instructed.

"Jake-"

"We're gonna talk. Stop telling me you're fine when you're not. Talk to me." He cared so much. I wiped my eyes and sighed.

"I'm not gonna get the family I want. Reuben, the baby and I. It's never going to happen. No matter how much I want it to happen or wish for it to happen I won't get that. Not with how Reuben is and what he does. A family unit is not possible."

"Hey don't say that. You never know, maybe when the baby is born he'll see that he can't be so involved with this gang beef."

"I'm on the verge of giving birth, Jake.  He's had 9 months to clean up his act and he doesn't care."

"I'm sure he does."

"He doesn't. He doesn't even want this baby, he said so himself."

"He didn't mean it."

"He did. He hasn't done a thing for us since we found out. I wasn't allowed a baby shower. We never went shopping. He hit me even though I was carrying his child. You've done more for this baby than he has."

"I was just filling the gaps."

"There shouldn't have been any gaps for you to fill, that's my point. You shouldn't have had to buy all the stuff the baby needed, that's Reuben's job and he didn't fulfill that." I turned to him.

"Why are you defending him anyway? You hate him."

"No, I don't like him, he hates me, there's a difference." He laughed.

I felt another sharp pain and sucked in air.

"You alright?" He looked at me concerned.

"Yeah."

"You look like you're in pain."

"I'm not." I lied. "The baby is just moving a lot."

"Maybe he's just reminding his mummy that she's got him by her side. Always will." He placed his hand on my belly.

I smiled after the pain subsided. "What makes you think it's a boy?"

"I just have a feeling." He grinned. I laughed.

"You know what, I have that same feeling." I admitted.

"You know, if Reuben doesn't step up and help you raise this child, I'll always be there for you." He rubbed my stomach and I placed my had atop his.

"I know you will." I smiled.

"We should go back." He suggested. I agreed.

We ordered our food, I got a quarter chicken with chips and garlic bread but I couldn't enjoy the meal properly because I kept on getting these cramp like pains which I had been feeling for a day or two. I never thought anything of it until yesterday but it had been getting worse and I couldn't ignore it now.

I pushed my food away and rest my head on the table.

"Are you not hungry anymore?" Courtnee asked. I shook my head and I heard my plate being scraped on the table towards her.

"Can I have it?" She asked. I shook my head again and raised it of of the table.

"I want to go home." I moaned.

"You haven't finished eating." Jake said, finishing his own food.

"I'm not hungry. Put it in a takeaway bag, I just want to go." I snapped. Within a few minutes we were in the car. I closed my eyes and rubbed my stomach.

"What's wrong? Are you in pain? Should I take you to the hospital?" Jake asked, worried.

"No, just take me home." I commanded.

"You're in labour aren't you? This is so exciting!" Courtnee giggled.

"I'm not, stop saying that." I kissed my teeth. I'm always snappy when I'm in pain.

"Why? Are you scared? You don't need to be, you're gonna be just fine."

"Yeah, yeah." I waved my hand dismissively. I was exhausted.

I opened my eyes as a surge of pain shot through my lower back.

"Ohhh fuck!" I placed my hands on the dashboard.

"What's wrong?"

"It hurts!" I exhaled, finally telling them I was in pain.

"That's it, we're going to the hospital." Jake said.

"No! They're gonna tell me to go home, just take me home please!" I panted. He didn't argue with me anymore and drove off.

By the time we got home, my brothers had already finished work and were in the kitchen.

Trey spotted me first and immediately knew something was up.

"Hey, what happened?" He stepped into the hallway and Sean followed.

"Contractions." Courtnee answered. Shock was etched onto Sean's face while an excited smile stretched on Trey's.

"It's not proper contractions. Probably just braxton hicks." I brushed off the situation.

"No. Definitely not. These are proper contractions. The time to have my niece or nephew is upon us!" Courtnee raised her hands in the air.

"Shut up please." I didn't mean to be rude but honestly all I wanted was for everyone to stop talking.

I laid on the couch and slipped off my sandals.

"I think it's really happening, man." Jake said to the boys.

For the next hour or so, the boys and Courtnee left me alone, only Jake was with me. I switched my position, allowing Jake to rub my back to alleviate the pain.

"Is it helping?" He asked. I nodded, breathing deeply.

"I'm sorry it's hurting you, darling. It'll be over soon and you'll have your little one." He kissed my shoulder.

It was like everyone was excited about this birth apart from me. I didn't think I was ready to deal with it. I wasn't ready to take on this adult responsibility, I was only 16.

I felt a gush of warmth between my legs and gasped.

"What?" Jake asked worried.

"I think I just peed myself." I whispered.

"Don't worry, I'll get some towels to clean up." He replied. I thanked him silently. He stood up to leave and that's when the pain got really intense.

I squeezed my eyes shut. Shit. This was really happening. I hadn't wet myself at all; my waters broke.

Guyyyys I'm so sorry I haven't updated in 1 2 3 4 months. I'm in uni now hooray so you can imagine my workload. That's not even an excuse cos I've hardly touched my work but I've been mad lazy and I love my bed innit so...

Shanae's gone into labour homagawsh, Lord take the wheel!

Ermmm I feel bad about my timing so I'm gonna try and upload twice today as a treat for you faithful readers. I appreciate every single one of you xx

Love Samantha
Xxx