RECAP:

"Sam, I'm sorry!" he cried desperately. I'm not going to lie, I felt a bit bad, still.

"Trey stop. Just stop." I said.

"Shanae man. Please-"

"I'm gone, Trey."

"No." he held my hand as he cried.

"Let me go."

"I don't want to, I love you man." he kissed my hand. I sighed.

"Don't forget your big brothers."

"But I'm not your sister, you said so yourself." I pushed him and closed the door.

"Drive." I said to Patrice once she sat down. She stared at me. "Patrice please! I just want to get out of here!" I cried. She nodded slowly and started the car.

END OF RECAP

We arrived at the house and I got out hastily. I stayed silent, walking from the garage to my room. I stopped walking when I reached the living room. DDK members filled the room and their attention diverted to me as my ankle boots 'click-clacking' on the floor came to a halt. I sighed and pushed through the crowd of boys to get to the staircase. I ignored their stares and wolf whistles.

"Shanae." a familiar voice called. I ignored it and started to walk up the stairs. "Shanae, wait." the same voice said. A hand gently grabbed my wrist and I tensed angrily. What is it with people grabbing my fucking wrists? I whipped around to be faced with Jake.

"What?" I asked rudely. He looked slightly shocked but kept his composure.

"I never knew James was your dad."

"Well, he is." I replied flatly. He stood there staring at me.

"What?"

"Um, I just wanted to know if you were okay." he stuttered slightly.

"No, I am not okay." I replied turning back around and walking up more.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked, looking at me with a concerned expression on his face.

"No! If I wanted to fucking talk to you, I would have fucking called you, alright?"

"Okay, well when you're ready to talk, you can call me. I'll always be there to listen to you."

"We're not friends Jake! I'm a South Souljas girl, you're in DDK! This won't work! Just leave me alone!" I shouted.

"Woah, what's going on?" said James, walking into the room.

"Nothing." I said quietly. I looked at Jake.

"I can't believe you." I whispered.

"What did I do?"

"You know what you did."

"I really don't. But if I've hurt you in any way, I'm sorry."

"Oh, spare me your apologies Jake." I rolled my eyes. "This friendship was never real, you were using me to get information." I talked low enough so only he could hear what I was saying.

"What? No. I was being a genuine friend, I wasn't using you."

"I heard James telling all you guys how I was a liability, and how you can use me."

"What? When?"

"Like a week ago."

"Where?"

"Here."

"Well, I've not been told. This is my first time in his house, I missed the last meeting."

"Ugh, whatever. I'm going to sleep." I walked hastily up the stairs.

"Shanae!" he called. I threw up the peace sign and walked to my room.

The next day

I was going to visit Reuben today. I woke up, brushed my teeth, took a shower, and got dressed in baby blue jeans, and a black top. I put on my black huaraches and swung my black pouch over my body. I combed my hair down and went downstairs. I had Curiously Cinnamon for breakfast and walked out the house, putting my earphones in.

I hugged him when he let me in. "Hi Rubes."

"Hey babe. You alright?" he asked, his morning voice made me smile. I nodded. He was only wearing black trainer socks and his blue boxers. His silver rosary glistened as sunlight reflected off it. I stared at his pecks and abs, having the urge to run my fingers on them.

"Like what you see?" he laughed. I giggled.

"Of course." I wrapped my arms around his neck. "And I'm glad it's all mine." I stared into his eyes.

"Yeah." he kissed my lips gently. "You're not off the hook you know." I let go of him and frowned.

"Off the hook? I didn't do anything."

"Sharnell? How can you beat her up like that?" he shook his head. I stared at him in disbelief.

"Not you too! I didn't beat her up!"

"I saw her face."

"I didn't do it!"

"Really Shanae? I'm sick of your lies."

"I didn't come here to argue Reuben." he looked down at me and sighed pulling me into a hug.

"I know. I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

I walked into the living room and plugged my phone into the speakers. I smiled at Reuben who stood leaning on the doorway.

"Do you remember this song?" I pressed play and turned up the volume, blasting Addictive - Bad Girl (Champion Remix) through his speakers. His eyes lit up.

"Oh my days, I ain't heard this in time!" he exclaimed. I laughed and attempted skanking, looking up at the ceiling. Reuben laughed loudly and ran upstairs. I continued and he came back down with a camera. "This is how crazy your mum is young one." he was recording me and I rocked my shoulders and hips, skanking faster. He laughed louder and more uncontrollably. "If you turn out to be crazy, know you didn't get it from me, you got it from your mama." he said. I giggled and walled towards him. I looked in the camera lens.

"I ain't even crazy fam! Just know your mums hardbody." I put my mouth close to the camera lens. "I'm haaaaardbody fam." I said, breathing on the camera. Reuben wiped the lens with a tissue and I continued skanking. He screeched in laughter.

"Eeer! Who still says hardbody?" he laughed. I watched as tears started seeping from his eyes.

"Looool, don't watch that, don't watch that." I said quickly, causing him to laugh more. He watched me skank.

"You ain't doin' it right." laughed Reuben. I screwed him playfully.

"What? You think you can do a better job?" I challenged.

"You dun'knoe! Man's a beast out 'ere fam!" he exclaimed. I walked over and took his position as cameraman. I recorded him skanking and was grinning from ear to ear. Tribal Magz ft KG - Feeling Funky came on and Reuben went buck wild!

"OH MY DAYS! THIS IS A TUUUUNE!" he screamed. I laughed and recorded him turning the volume all the way up. He jumped on the sofa and skanked hard! I couldn't stop laughing. The bass rocked through the flat and I was happy. I put the camera down where Reubens pictures were so it was still recording. I pulled him off the sofa and we started skanking together. We were doing that body rolling skank, where you're body rolling but you have guns up with your fingers. Lol! We were grinding on each other when the front door opened. Courtnee walked in and stared at us.

"So you lot are having a two man shubz, and you didn't invite me nah?" she must have been shouting bare loud cos we could hear her clearly over the music. "Lets turn this into a three man shubz yeah? Alright! That's how I like iiit!!!" she screeched. She joined us and we were all skanking to my funky house playlist. I loved these two, they were amazing people, always finding a way to make me laugh.

Courtz went back to her flat after we chilled for a bit. Reuben and I were in the living room, watching Maury and eating popcorn. My head rested on his bare chest and I looked up at him.

"Guess what babe." I said, my mouth filled with popcorn.

"What?" asked Reuben, his eyes fixed on the screen.

"James was having a meeting yesterday."

"And what?"

"All of DDK was there."

"Well of course they were babe. Like you said, he was having a meeting." he laughed.

"Yeah, well, I bumped into Jake."

"Who's that?"

"The guy that didn't touch me when the rest of them were."

"The white guy?"

"Well actually he's not white, he's from Turkey."

"Okay, well, what about him?"

"He faked our friendship to get information." I said. He looked down at me.

"What friendship?"

"Oh. Uh, we were friends for a while."

"A long while?"

"Uh well, I don't know."

"Since when were you friends?"

"Since he helped me."

"Shan, that's a good 2 months or so."

"Well I didn't plan on becoming his friend." I took my head off his smooth chest and sat next to him in an upright position.

"What have you told him?"

"Nothing."

"Don't lie to me."

"I'm not!" I replied defensively.

"Yes you are, what have you told him?" he shouted angrily.

"I already said, nothing!" I looked at him, taken aback by his sudden outburst of anger.

"I want you to tell me everything you've said to him."

"Well I can't remember! It was 2 months ago. I can't remember what I said!"

"Well think then."

"It's not in my memory, I don't remember it!"

"Ahh, for fuck sake Shanae." he groaned, running his hands through his hair. He looked at me. "How could you be so stupid?" he moaned.

"Stupid?" I looked at him in disbelief.

"How can you go and give information-"

"I told you I didn't give him any information!"

"But you were still friends with him."

"What? So I can't have friends now?"

"Did I say that?"

"You were implying it."

"No, I was implying that it was stupid of you to be friends with a member of DDK, actually." he said. I huffed and we sat silently.

"Well we're not friends anymore." I said quietly. He nodded.

"Good." he chirped. I sighed. "Did you enjoy you lots friendship?" He asked. I stayed silent. I didn't know what to say! He'd be mad if I said yes, but I'd be lying if I said no.

"Uh, not really."

Not really isn't an option. Yes or no?"

"Well, not really is my answer-"

"YES," he shouted. "or no?" he said calmly. I nodded.

"Yes." I whispered, looking up into his eyes.

"Yeah." he nodded his head.

"Look Reuben, I'm sorry yeah? It was stupid of me to befriend the enemy."

"It really was." he agreed. I rolled my eyes.

"Rubes, are you okay? Like, what's wrong? You keep switching on me."

"I'm fine." he stared at the TV and put some popcorn in his mouth.

"You sure?"

"I'm fine."

"It's just that I've never seen you like this before, and it's worrying me-"

"I'm, fine." he demanded.

"Really Reuben? If you have something on your mind or if you're stressed out about something, I'm here. I mean, I am here for a reason you know. I'm here for you. I'm your girlfriend and if anything's bugging you, you can tell me-" he stood up at an inhumane speed and stood in front of me. Without warning, he punched me square in the nose. My hands flew up to my nose as pain riddled through it.

"I said I'm fucking fine!" he grabbed my hair. "For fuck sake!" he pulled my hands from my nose and punched me in the cheek. "If anything is wrong, it's the fact that you were friends with a member of fucking DDK!" he yelled, punching me four more times when he said "fucking DDK". He breathed heavily, and watched me as I slowly raised a shaky hand to my face. I let out a little yelp, feeling my cheek already starting to swell. He released my hair and stood back, watching me cautiously. He put his hands up to his face covering his nose and mouth as he realised what he had done. He ran his hands through his hair and his mouth opened and closed numerous times before he could get a sound out. My eyes filled with tears.

" Shanae-" he breathed quietly and I let out a cry as the first tear rolled down my cheek. "Shanae, I'm so sor-" he started. I hastily got off the couch and took my phone out the speakers. I ran to the door and Reuben followed. I fiddled with the lock on the door, being pulled back by Reuben who had his arms around my waist.

"Get off me!" I screamed.

"Shanae I'm so sorry! I'm so, I'm so sorry."

"Yeah, I know you are!" I shouted. I opened the front door and stormed out of the flat. I wiped the tears that had wet my face and walked down the stairs of the tower block. I decided to walk back to my parents house. If I got the bus, I wouldn't have anything to do and would think of it too much.

When I got in, I rushed off to my room, ignoring James, who was sitting on the couch watching TV. He saw me and paused the TV.

"Shan, where'd you go? What happened to your face?" he asked. His voice dripped with concern. I closed my bedroom door softly behind me and collapsed on my bed. There was a soft knock on the door and James walked in. He was wearing a black T-shirt, black basketball shorts, and socks and sandals. He sat at the end of my bed and pat the space next to him. I slid myself down the bed and sat up. I looked at the floor.

"Shan?" he softly lifted my head and I looked at him. His light brown eyes searched my face and he stared at my cheek and furrowed his eyebrows. He looked me in my eyes and spoke. "Shan." he said. I sniffed and looked away. My eyesight became blurry as tears filled my eyes. I broke down and turned to him. I wrapped my arms around his large frame and clutched onto him. He soothingly hugged me. "Oh Pumpkin." he said. I cried into his chest as he rubbed my back gently. See, this is what dads are for. He took off my huaraches and hugged me again. We ended up laying down and I had my head rested on his hard chest. I didn't realise I had fallen asleep until I woke up and my room was dark, and James's chest wasn't under me. I looked at my watch to see it was 20:08. I got up and crept out of the room.

I went to the kitchen and got out some ice cream from the freezer. Ben and Jerry's Cookie Dough was the one for me! I sat in the dark eating out the ice cream when the light turned on. I turned around and Patrice walked towards me. She had her red silk robe wrapped around her. She smiled warmly at me and kissed my forehead when she reached me. She walked to the freezer and got out the peas. She held it to my cheek and nose as I indulged in the ice cream.

"Your dad said you were crying." she said. I nodded. "Which means I'm failing you." I looked at her confused. "Remember what I said, I don't want to see that my daughter is crying and is hurting. I should be able to protect you from that, and if I don't, I'm not doing my job right am I?"

I nodded.

"D'you wanna talk about it?" she asked. I shook my head.

"Nah thanks. I'm just gonna go back to sleep. And don't allow Reuben in this house again please. It's best for us all." I stood up and threw the tub in the bin. I washed the spoon and made my way back to my room. The alarm went off and I stopped in the corridor, watching Patrice shut it off.

"I'm gonna check the camera's yeah?" she said. I nodded and walked to my room. The light was still off, but a little bit of light came in from the street lamps. I felt a presence in the room and uneasily lay in my bed. I looked to my still broken window, reminiscing what happened. I sighed and scanned my room. Out from the corner of my eye, I saw something move. I froze and turned to where I saw movement by the window. Unfortunately, that corner was completely back and I couldn't see anything. Out from it stepped a shadowy figure, causing me to gasp. It pulled down it's hood and I screwed. He smiled at me. I stood up.

"Reuben get out." I commanded. He stepped towards me and I backed up, shaking.

"Look, I said I'm sorry." he defended.

"I don't care, get out!" I said harshly. He advanced towards me and I backed up.

"I didn't mean to hurt you, I promise."

"Don't make promises you can't fucking keep, Reuben." I told him.

"I haven't."

"You haven't? Are you trying to make me angry? You promised to never hurt me again. And what the fuck did you do?" my voice became shaky as a lump formed in my throat. Tears threatened to fall from my eyes.

"Babe, I'm sorry!"

"I don't care! You said you weren't going to and you still did!" I cried.

"Yeah, well you're a traitor!"

"What? How did we get onto that subject? And I'm not a traitor!"

"Yes you are. You befriended the enemy! Who fucking does that?" he shouted.

"Well at least he cared about me and gave a shit about me when you were too busy fucking Sharnell!" I yelled. He looked down, staring me in my eyes. He stood still and I backed up, nervous about his next move.

"Oh, give me a break." he sighed. Where'd you hear that?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes it matters."

"Well it doesn't matter to me! I know where you were when you weren't by my side when I got beaten up!" I shouted. He glared at me.

"Yeah! I know about that!" I added. "After all the bullshit you've put me through, I'm still with you! I think I might just be in a one sided relationship, cos it seems I'm the only one willing to love here."

"Uh, you hurt my feelings by saying that."

"YOU DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT MY FEELINGS, SO FUCK YOURS!" I screamed.

"STOP YELLING!" he screamed back, silencing me. The anger on his face made my mouth dry, and my body shake in fear. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I'm tired of fearing these guys. I'm sick of being afraid. It's time for me to stand up for my own damn self.

"I will do what I damn well please, thank you very fucking much!" I shouted. He shook his head. "Yeah! I will!" I yelled. "D'you know what? I regret staying with your messed up arse! I should have broken this relationship off at the start. I know you paid Tashard to beat me up! I know you've been fucking Sharnell from before then! You fucking raped me, and got me pregnant! You caused DDK to come up in my yard, and trash the motherfucking place! I should have left you for Jake time ago! At least he really cares about me, like proper, cares. At least I know he'd never hurt me. And maybe, just maybe I would have given him my virginity, so he wouldn't have to steal it from me, like you did!" I yelled. He lunged for me and grabbed my hair, dragging me to the floor. He straddled me.

"No!" I pleaded. He pounded his fists into me as I cried heavily. "I'm sorry!" I cried, putting my hands in front of my face, protecting it. He pulled them away from my face and continued to pummel me. Every part of my face felt broken as he continued to release his anger on me.

"Don't ever fucking say shit like that to me again!" he grabbed my hair and slammed the back of my head on the floor, causing me to yelp. The gash at the back of my head still hadn't fully healed and a searing pain was released as my cut made contact with the floor. "Do you understand?" he yelled. I felt the blood escaping my nose. He punched me hard in the ribs numerous times. "I WILL FUCKING END YOU! YOU BELONG TO ME, BITCH! YOU'RE MY BITCH!" he screamed.

"Shanae! Shanae! Don't go into your bedroom! Reuben's in there!" I could hear Patrice say from the corridor. He punched me 3 more times before getting off me. "You're mine." he muttered. He booted me in the stomach before glancing at me and leaving my room via the broken window. I heard my door open and footsteps. A gasp followed soon after.

"Shanae?" Patrice said. I stirred, feeling myself lose consciousness. "Oh God, Shanae! Shanae!" I felt her crouch down. She held my hand and smoothed my hair. "Shanae! Oh my gosh, James! JAMES! CALL AN AMBULANCE!" she screamed, crying. "Everything's gonna be okay Nae. I'm here okay?" she soothed. "Oh God!" she cried. "James, hurry!" Soon after, James walked in. I looked up lazily at him with my one eye that wasn't swollen shut.

"Oh shit!" He gasped. He had the phone up to his ear. "Ambulance. I-i-i-i don't know what happened." He stuttered. "Shanae Kelsey, 15." He said to the operator.

"Erm yeah. but she's breathing real hard. And she's bleeding a lot. From her nose and, and head it seems." My eyelid became increasingly heavy and I felt myself go weak, I couldn't clutch Patrice's hand anymore.

"Shanae, stay with me okay?" Was the last thing I heard.

..................................................................................................................................................................

I slowly opened my eyes and looked around. I sighed and kissed my teeth. This hospital's becoming a fucking second home to me man. I was in the room alone and my pain had subsided a bit. The familiar beeping beside me kept me awake. My door opened and Reuben walked in. I gasped and felt myself shake in fear.

"Reuben get out." I whispered.

"But babe-"

"No, Reuben. Get out and leave me the FUCK alone!" I said, raising my voice. He shook his head, chuckling. He walked towards me and I pressed myself into the bed.

"You know I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Bullshit! You had every intention of hurting me."

"No I did-"

"Cut the crap, Reuben. How do you manage to lay your hands on me twice in one day? I didn't even do anything wrong!"

"You were talking shit."

"I wasn't talking shit you arsehole."

"Yes you were." He laughed. I glared at him. "Come on Shanae! You couldn't have meant what you said. You were talking about getting together with Jack-"

"His name is Jake." I held his gaze.

"Same difference. You must have been off your head to be saying shit like that." he looked at his feet.

"Well I wasn't. I meant it." I retaliated.  His head snapped up and I watched as the anger rose in him. I licked my lips nervously as he approached the bed. He sat next to me and looked down at my face.

"Oh babe." he stroked my face lightly and I gulped. "You're just confused, I know you are. When you heal up, you'll see you were just angry. You didn't mean it. Did you?" he stared at me longingly. He was worming his way through my head, and I don't know how he did it, but I shook my head. "Yeah I know you didn't." I heard voices outside the room and Reuben looked to the door. "Okay I gotta go now, okay? I'll come by another time." he said still looking at the door. He stood up and I grabbed his hand. "What's wrong?" he furrowed his eyebrows. I smiled as tears formed in my eyes.

"I love you." I whispered. He chuckled and leant down. His soft lips crashed into mine and he put his hand at my waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck, my fingers raking through his hair. He bit my lower lip and forced his tongue in my mouth. He was kissing me with such passion, I could feel myself get hot.

"What the?" I heard a voice say before Reuben was dragged off me. I watched as James held onto Reuben's collar, pinning him on the wall.

"James!" I gasped.

"You wanna put your hands on my daughter? You wanna put your hands on my daughter ay?" he shouted. Reuben smirked.

"It's not like you've never done it." he said coolly. James's face fell. "All them times you beat her up and you're having a go at me? Have a go at yourself mate. I'm not the only one in the wrong." he said. James screwed.

"What do you think you're playing at?" asked James.

"Playing? I'm not playing. Unlike you." Reuben smirked. I looked on, confused. "Admit it. You can't keep this 'Good Dad' act up for long. I know what you're trying to do and it's not going to work. Shanae is a South Souljas girl, and a South Souljas girl only. No matter what, she will always be mine."

"First of all, I am not putting on an act, I am trying to be a better father-" Reuben scoffed, cutting off James.

"Yeah right." he stared at James who rolled his eyes.

"Don't you dare judge me as a parent. You know nothing about being a dad, so don't act like you do."

"Oh come on! You're not a dad! You're just a sperm donor. You've never been there for Shanae, never had any respect for her. You see, your daughter is the toughest person I know. If you acted like the dad you were supposed to be, you would have known that." Tears pricked my eyes as Reuben spoke. James let out a hollow laugh.

"And how well does your dad know you?" he smirked, watching Reubens crushed expression.

"Don't you dare talk about my dad." Reuben clenched his jaw angrily.

"He was a curious soul." James continued.

"James stop." I pleaded helplessly. He looked back, shushing me.

"This isn't your war Shanae." he said. He turned his attention back to Reuben. "Now, your father, he was a player. Had bitches and baby mothers all over the place. And your mum was one of them. Your dad was weak."

"Stop it." said Reuben through clenched teeth.

"He became settled too young. He retired too quickly, you see in this life there's no time to retire. Your dad was too dumb to know that."

"I'm warning you." Reuben balled up his fists.

"Everything he had done had caught up with him, and his stupidity dug his grave. If he hadn't retired, he would be alive today, and own South. He fucked up his own life, and in the end he deserved to die." I cried at James's words of cruelty. Reuben lashed out at him, knocking him to the ground. They wrestled for a little while before Patrice broke it up.

"Don't say shit about my dad again! Fuck with me, you're dead." he fumed.

"I think you should leave." said Patrice. I watched Reuben storm out, flinging the door open, and disappearing from my sight. I leaned back and cried, shocked by the behaviour I had just witnessed. Why does everything have to be so complicated?

UGGGHHH #CRINGE Oh my days this chapter's DISGUSTING, like this chapter just annoys me ugggh lol bye