an hour walking less weight
than the talking
long did the words scrape
dragging long my self hate
after the pause of drama's wake

I felt the confluence
of stress strewed
to the back halls
of my mind's room
the drip and drool
of trust misused
coloring conversations
in tar apprehension
didn't curb my enthused

drive to be sweaty
and ask for rides
to eat from pity
racking debt inside

for the bond
that was won
with the fun
and the bicker
was bigger than any self shame
thicker than blood or name

and even when the rat king
stood upon a wobbly dias
I charmed honest like Wolfie
ignoring Salieri's jealous decrees
watching smoke lies
wafted aside by hearts inoculized
by fam and philautia

in those bonds of party jeers
among songs off key and clear
we grew strong and lent ears
in a friendship that lasted years

even Sirius blinks
in the northern squalor
of cities thick with lonely
and friends still drove
over an hour to holler
makin time for homies