(Lila's P.O.V)

"She was a fake nice girl who deserved it. Every single second of the pain she could've felt—"

I didn't realize when I snapped—or maybe I did—but all I could think of was punching Veronica.

I was internally fuming.

Yet all I did was slap her. Hard.

From the moment she started to goad me, I'd done my best to keep calm.

And when she started to cross the line with her words, I only retorted aptly. With words and not my hands, fisted and itching to break her jaw.

I hoped all those calming and anger controlling exercises Diego forced me to learn wouldn't be in vain.

But alas!

Of course, Veronica was on a mission to see how far she could push me and that, I believe, is justification enough for my actions in retaliation.

The red handprint on Veronica's cheek gave me a twisted sense of glee but it did nothing to calm my whirlwind of emotions.

I'd never hit anyone outside of the ring and this could be considered a fatal mistake on my own part.

However, hearing Veronica belittle my best friend and the pain she went through made my hold on my self-control slip.

My blood was boiling and my jaw was clenched tightly. But my outward appearance would look calm. It was something I'd worked on so as to hide my feelings.

With a serene exterior, I didn't spare anyone a glance as I walked out of the quiet library. The eyes everyone had on me made me feel like ants were crawling over my skin but I didn't show my discomfort.

I'd felt the same way two years ago when Mellisa died but I rather take this than that.

Now all I needed was to get some punches in and hit flesh to relieve my anger.

I swiftly grabbed my bag and books from my locker before making my way out.

There was no way I could spend the rest if of day in school. And I also needed updates on what had happened straight from the source.

It wasn't Mr Serdano who was first on our hit list. However, after some last minute deliberation with Diego, we had arrived at the conclusion that Mayor Welsh should be left for the last considering his crimes and position.

Although guilt pinched me because Michael was my friend, it wasn't enough to make me rethink my plans. Some things needed to be done and this was one of them. Micahel was just unfortunate enough to have a father who took part in crimes like forging medical reports and eventually ruining lives.

The school grounds were sparsely populated as I left the school gates, the clouds a dark grey in the sky as if rain would greet us any time now.

No one followed me.

And I'm not sure whether I felt disappointed or relieved that Derek hadn't pursued me like the last time. I hadn't been able to properly relieve my stress and anger back then when Veronica had brought up Mellisa but I won't lie by saying he didn't end up helping me in his own way.

The thought gave me pause before I shook my head.

No, this was better. Much better.

•♤•

"What the hell, why are you so pissed off!"

I snickered as my opponent, Jay, panted. He glared at me playfully, and I shrugged with my mask on.

Although it wasn't know who the Wildcat was, I did have closer sparring relationships with some of the trusted and frequent trainees or fighters at Black & Blue.

Jay was one of them and he was a good opponent. Although the anchor, he was no ordinary person either.

Sometimes I wondered how I had learnt to fight in two years and turned out good enough to be an even match for someone like Diego Morales.

Despite my fit physique and interest in arts of fighting since I was young, I'd never had any proper guidance and YouTube videos can only do so much for a 15 year old girl just going through adolescence.

Diego claims it was my grit, determination, rioting emotions and a little bit of innate talent.

I can't refute much of that.

Jay flopped down and I unwrapped my knuckles, breathing heavily. "Your left hook has gotten better."

Jay opened one eye and looked at me from his position on the ring floor. "Thanks." He groaned dramatically.

I rolled my eyes and bit back the snapping retort building up inside me from my own issues.

I twisted my neck both ways, still not satisfied enough to call it quits today.

Anxiousness washed over me and I wished to hurt someone seriously. Without abandon. Without considerations like I had with my official fights at Blue.

Still, I suppose I was lucky Veronica had pissed me off on a Friday night because I was scheduled to have fights tonight.

Including with the Leopard and I really need that right about now.

Of course, that reminded me that Michael had made Blue our meeting point tonight which meant he probably had plans on challenging either me or the Leopard.

It would probably help him too if he was having emotional trouble. Teenagers at Ladenhill had made sparring with me and the Leopard a stress reliever for themselves as well so it wasn't too hard to speculate.

To be honest I'd rather he spar with me. Because although I couldn't unravel the truth to him or confess that I was a reason for his falling out with his father today, I could at least let him hit me once or twice.

"Wildcat." The dark skinned man that operated Blue called out to me and I glanced towards him.

He gestured, "Come down."

Diego hadn't been here when I'd arrived an hour ago and I knew if he came back I wouldn't be allowed to spar.

So of course I took advantage of his absence and made Jay spar with me. Not that it helped much.

One flashback was all it took to make me grind my teeth.

Veronica had made fun of and disregarded Mellisa's pain.

My pain.

And that stung me like a thousand bee stings. It made my heart twist with invisible thorns and my mind go blank with rage and pain.

No one would understand that entirely because everyone's struggles and pains are their own.

But she didn't need to be so insensitive when she didn't even know one-tenth of the truth that was buried with Mellisa's death.

I exhaled sharply through my nose as Diego shut the door to his office and I plopped down on the sofa.

He stared at me but I only grabbed a bottle of mineral water from the cooler next to the sofa before taking a sip from it.

"Are you ignoring me?"

I gulped down a mouthful of the cold water and prayed it would cool down my head as well.

Nope, sorry. I guess it's the day where all my mantras are ineffective.

Huh.

New experiences everyday, I guess.

"Lila."

I raised my gaze to look at Diego with his arms folded. "What?" I snapped.

"I heard what happened." His tone softened and I looked away.

I didn't know how to deal with Diego when he was understanding or caring.

Well, I'd didn't know how to deal with someone being like that to me in general.

I could deal with the way Derek would irritate me or distract me by annoying me or being a nuisance.

We're not going to focus on why that lunatic popped up into my head right now.

But gentle and emotional talks made me feel like the biggest awkward potato in the world.

This character trait could definitely be a result of my lack of communication with my parents. And though Grace tried, she and I had a dynamic where she was the one breaking down and asking me for advice and not the other way round.

I swallowed thickly and when I didn't respond to him, Diego grunted before sitting down next to me.

"That was wrong of Veronica to do—",

"This was why our plan had the first person to be taken down as Mayor Welsh." I hissed.

I was angry at him too.

Diego sighed, "I'm aware, Lila. But you and I both know that wasn't the better and smarter choice."

I remained mum because yes, I knew he was right.

Would I let him know that he was right?

Yeah, no way in the seven rings if hell.

"I know you think I played you but Lila," He continued explaining, "Letting you think Veronica's Dad would be the first one going down gave you an immeasurable peace of mind and I couldn't take that away. It was going to be Mr Serdano from the start. You just didn't pick up on that."

I clenched my jaw and my hands tightened around the water bottle. The plastic crinkled and I felt my muscles lock up as well.

Yeah, I didn't have the forethought at that time and maybe I still don't. That's what Diego does for me. Tasha helps me with. Because I'm not smart and calm when it comes to Mellisa.

Her tragedy wasn't hers alone. It was mine as well.

I was lucky enough to survive.

She.....

She wasn't.

Emotion clogged up my throat and I wanted Derek's helmet just so I could feel like I was hidden from the world and proceed to cry a little.

It was a strange sense of reassurance that being in Derek's silent presence had provided me with yesterday.

For a mere second, I'd even contemplated telling him all my secrets and the urge had been overwhelming.

But then I remembered the consequences knowing my secrets would entail for him and that was it.

"I'm surprised Derek didn't tag along."

I rolled my eyes, "Maybe he's realized I'm high maintenance."

"Good thing I belive he's cut out for high maintenance girls." Diego smirked at me and I rolled my eyes.

"Why even should he have tagged along?" I questioned, genuinely baffled.

He shrugged, "Didn't he bring you to punch out your stress last time?"

I glared at him and he bit his lip.

I knew Diego was teasing me from the mocking tone and it almost worked but I was reminded of why I'd come here in a fit of rage the last time.

I appreciated Diego's attempt at consolation this way but I was a little too occupied with replays of present Veronica's words and my past memories.

The clash was horrific and the smile that had started inching up my face slipped like shadows into shade.

It wasn't just survivor's guilt that haunted me but every action I'd witnessed and gone through myself until her death.

I'd never been much of a crier and I still wasn't but...

I don't know.

Letting it all out yesterday had been both embarrassing and consoling.

Nevermind the fact that I'd willingly opened up to Derek Greyson more than I had with anyone except Diego and Cameron.

It weighed greatly on my mind but since it provided me comfort for the time being, I let the constant thoughts of Derek take the backseat.

I lowered my eyes further as I set the bottle aside. I heard Diego's groan as he realized his failure at cheering me up.

"Lila Adele Smith."

I brought up my knees to hug to my chest.

"I know." I acknowledged Diego softly. "I know but it hurt Michael too and he is innocent."

"And his father hurt countless others including you and Mellisa who were completely innocent too." He countered.

I grit my teeth, "Fine. You're right. I know that but that doesn't make accepting it any easier."

"It's not supposed to be." He nodded to himself. "Sometimes we all want to just hide away from the truth and it's alright to do so." He glanced at me. "You're just a kid too, Lila."

No. No, I wasn't. Maybe in terms of age. But mentally I wasn't.

There were many regrets I had and there were decisions I made every day, wondering if they were the right choice or not.

As if reading my mind, Diego's words contradicted everything I thought.

"Don't beat yourself up over it all. It's not that you're dumb or lack insight, Lila. You were going through a rough time and handing countless emotions and a double life. It's alright for you to want to be selfish and you did nothing wrong. Mr Serdano deserves to be put behind bars."

That was true and completely irrefutable.

"Yeah. But I'm also greedy and impatient for their pain. I want to hurt them all ten times–no hundred time more." I chuckled sardonically.

Diego lay a hand on my shoulder comfortingly and when I glanced at him, he grinned at me savagely.

"That's exactly what you'll do. Don't forget; we've already begun and there's no going back now."

He was right.

Again.

•♤•

Unfamiliar rap music blasted through the speakers once more and disco lights went around lighting up the makeshift arena/stadium in their signature yellow and purples.

I swiped my phone and was met with a few texts from everyone regarding today's fiasco.

Warren was asking me if I'd come to Blue and Nora had a similar question.

I was suddenly a little thankful for what had happened today morning because if not for that, I'd have to brainstorm solid excuses for getting out of coming here tonight.

It was a close call.

But after my showdown with Veronica in the morning, no one would push me to accompany them despite the magnitude of Michael's problem.

I scrolled down further.

Looney Tunes: You were so cool earlier that I fell for you all over again.

Ps: I got added into Laden High's official group. Now I'll be in the loop too, Kitkat.

That was it.

But somehow, the cheesy, nonsensical line made my lips tip upwards in the beginnings of a smile.

And the Ps made me snort internally.

I deliberated how much longer it would take for Derek to truly weasel his way into my life because I already found myself losing to his bad-boy, annoying neighbor charms.

Or maybe that was just me being emotional and thinking a meltdown in front of Greyson made us grow closer.

Shaking my head, I exited the app. I was about to close the phone but a text from Cameron came in.

I bit my lip, unwilling to open but curious to see what he had texted me. In the end, curiosity won.

Cam: I'm sorry, Lila. Are you okay?

I let out a breath at the message and glanced up to check my hair in the mirror once more.

"Tsk. Why are you being so self-conscious today?" Tasha swatted away my hand from pulling out a pin I thought useless in my hair.

I grunted, focusing again on Cameron's message as I replied curtly.

Me: I'm mad at you.

Cam: I know. But Veronica's Dad can't  be the first to go. The bigger ones go last.

As much as I hated to admit it, the verity of his claims was undeniable. Although I'm sure, in his hearts of hearts, he was glad that Veronica was alright.

And that pissed me off again because Cam didn't know what she'd done this morning.

Maybe if I sent him one of the many videos from today's altercation circulation on the internet to him, he'd change his mind about liking Veronica.

A guy like Cam liking her.....she'd never realize how lucky she was. But she really didn't deserve him or an ounce of his affections.

With that thought in mind, I quickly forwarded the video my annoying neighbor had sent right after his message to Cam with hopes of a response along the lines of She's-awful-and-I-don't-like-her-anymore.

Ah. I guess that's too much to wish for though.

I bit my lip, adjusting the purple mask and making sure my eyes looked a shade of blue far away from my normal metal grey.

"Didn't you hear what happened today at Laden High?" I questioned.

She sighed, her fluffed up curly hair bouncing with her movements as she prattled around with her makeup and hair accessories. "I did and you did amazing by slapping Veronica." She grinned at me in the mirror and I involuntarily grinned back.

Truth be told, I really, really felt good that I'd slapped her.

I smiled up at Tasha slightly, "Thanks. I needed that."

She nodded in response and ushered me to get up. "Now off you go. It's time to start today's event. Everyone is hyped and I have a feeling one of your opponents may end up being the Serdano kid."

With those ominous words, she left me to go attend to The Leopard and my stomach did flips at the reminder.

I felt queasy unlike never before and that threw me off-kilter.

All at once, my name was announced and I walked out onto the customary stage.

It was perhaps fate or more likely bad luck that my eyes met a pair of copper ones the very instant I swept my gaze over the crowd.

Spotting my entire friend group with a Michael that looked hyped up and unlike his comfortable self, I cursed the gods for the disaster they'd turned my life into.

Even Shakespeare would applaud the tragic play my life had turned into.

But all I could do was wait my turn with Michael and ponder over how to curb the mix of guilt and sick satisfaction inside of me.

I was a really shitty friend, bringing misfortune to everyone.

My eyes dimmed.

I guess Veronica wasn't entirely wrong.

A/N

Heya! Hope you've all been well, guys!

How was this chapter and the little tit bits of information? What do you think about Lila's internal thoughts and her feelings regarding Michael? What about her being kept in the dark about some of the stuff? And her changing dynamics with Derek? Anything else?

Hope you really enjoyed and keep reading! Don't forget to vote and comment please! I appreciate it!

Till next time then!

~Skyler