(Lila's P.O.V)

"Sure."

Derek grinned and I was surprised at the manner in which it transformed his face. The tense lines in his handsome face melted away and something in me liked that I could make him feel at ease.

It was strange.

And annoying.

Everything associated with Derek Greyson was annoying.

But what could I, a super nice girl and neighbor, do after all?

I could be his distraction if he wanted and I was actually pleased that he didn't smoke but instead called me out.

Granted, I was planning on ignoring him but something in me wanted to see Derek's face after all despite my previous claims of being glad I didn't run into him today.

I hummed in response and decided that prying his secret of why he was agitated would have to wait.

I was no longer uninterested in Derek. I mean not in that way, ugh. Just....I wanted to know who he was.

So instead of questioning him, I brought up a topic I knew he would enjoy talking about. "Why have you been gone in the evenings so frequently this month?"

Dark hair fell over his forehead, the sides cropped short as Derek's full lips twisted up in amusement. His copper eyes looked a dark brown in the night with the street light so dim. But it didn't make him look any less appealing.

My eyes dipped to the straining shirt he wore, his muscles definitely more defined and bunched than they were a month ago.

Damn Diego and the workout sessions he put him through.

"Why? You miss me, Kitkat?" He rose a brow suggestively and I snickered.

"More like enjoy your absence but you can delude yourself. Go right ahead." I jerked my chin in a 'go ahead' motion and he gave me a look of mock hurt that I easily brushed off.

"Still. You asked. Meaning you noticed." Derek pointed out, smirking.

I smacked myself mentally for agreeing to be his distraction.

You're no Mother Teresa, Lila. You shouldn't be so self sacrificing.

And as far as noticing went, of course I noticed. I wasn't dumb and we were basically in the same place while at Blue so of course I knew! But I suppressed the desire to throw a lamp at his handsome smirking face and smiled blandly.

"So what have you been doing?" I ignored the direction he was steering the conversation in and rose a brow.

His dimple slightly visible, the tattoo over his neck and shoulder shifting with his movements, Derek replied. "That's a secret. I don't think I can tell you."

I sighed like he was being a bother but shrugged. "Okay."

He blinked and then frowned. "Okay?"

I bit back my smile and nodded casually. "Yeah. Okay. Keep your secrets, I don't care."

Derek stared at me and I kept my face expressionless.

I'd just done the opposite of what Derek expected me to do and it was easy to figure out that this reaction would guarantee me a good enough answer.

Act uninterested in something he wanted me to know and he'd not only tell me himself but the hit to his pride would be misinterpreted inside that haughty brain as amusement at my uncommon rebuttal.

A reader is so knowledgeable. And being an avid one myself, I could tell Derek was the kind of guy fitting a somewhat loose reputation of a bad boy. But he was unlike the many male characters I'd read about and that was what made handling him difficult at times.

Sure some things were the same.

The arrogance, the leather, the tattoos, the smirks, the looks, the easy flirting and even some personality traits.

But Derek was also a contradiction in himself because of that very reason.

His easy smiles, the playful persona, the sometimes kind gestures, the easygoing gait, the persistence, the expressiveness.

These were the traits a bad-boy wasn't supposed to have.

Where was the broody face, the scowls, the danger, the self dependency?

"Damn. Smart girl. You know I'll tell you now." Narrowed copper eyes met mine and I finally smirked.

But he too had a faint smile on his lips and his voice was carrying no heat. He enjoyed it just as much as he enjoyed bantering with me.

"Smart boy. You figured it out." My words were laced with unspoken tethers and hooks meant to ensnare him.

And like a fish, he fell prey to them, following me into the orbit where I'd wrench the answers of my many questions out of his stubborn distracting lips.

Sighing forlornly, he watched the flames of his lighter and answered me. "I've just been...." He met my eyes with serious intentions. "Body building."

We stared at each other, silent and moody before I blurted out, "What the fuck?"

He cracked up and I felt my mouth drop open.

"Seriously? Body building?" I gave him an incredulous look and he chuckled, his eyes noting the features of my face intently.

"You were ogling me before so I'm sure you noticed."

Damn, he was obviously more in tune with his surroundings than I had suspected initially. "Well, one should appreciate good muscles." I shrugged.

A hearty laugh escaped his lips, the darkness of his copper eyes overshadowed by the distracting banter he welcomed. I sighed heavily.

"What's the history behind the lighter then?" I wasn't about to give up so quickly today. I planned on gleaning some good pieces of information at the very least.

Derek's laughter had died down and as he met my stare, he again clicked his lighter on and off. Like a habit.

I didn't expect him to reply but he did. "You could say it was a gift." His eyes flicked down to the lighter and his thumb rubbed the intricate designs on it.

I silently leaned my cheek on my palm as I listened and cataloged.

"I want to get rid of it sometimes but I've got a little bit of an attachment issue." He flashed me a grin but I could see it didn't replicate his signature genuineness. "In the end, I guess the good memories weighed more than the bad ones."

I slowly nodded because I understood. I got that.

It was similar to how I kept the pictures and the trinkets and most importantly that brand.

I involuntarily clenched my teeth.

Even the thought of it sent fire licking up my spine and I took a deep breath to calm myself. This wasn't about me.

I tuned back and watched as Derek's eyes drank me in, narrowed inconspicuously.

Did he see my face shrouded in shadows and my eyes that of sharp cutting steel?

I didn't get to ask him because he spoke first, "Did you have a good time with your parents?"

I rose a brow but nodded. "Yeah."

I'd already deduced he had issues with his family but what exactly they were, I couldn't know. Unless he told me himself that is.

"Hey, Looney Tunes?" Derek tilted his head as he responded to my call. "Why do you need a distraction?"

He gulped.

I stared.

And then he broke the eye contact, the copper of his eyes dimmed till it looked like a flame ready to burn out.

"You're still lucky, you know." His words were weighted and I gave him time to contemplate his options of whether he would divulge any information after all or not.

In the end he deemed me good enough.

"I know a secret. One that could tear my family apart. I was 14 when I found out by complete accident and God, did it ruin me."

Derek tipped his head back to look at the sky, the stars visible in Ladenhill's clear sky. I watched as he swallowed, his throat moving.

His words struck me and I licked my lips, resorting to questioning myself. "What secret is it?"

Derek didn't meet my eyes but a sad smile tilted his lips upwards and I didn't like it.

"A not-so-big-bad-one for others maybe. But to me it's detrimental." His eyes locked onto mine and the swirling emotions in them took me aback slightly.

"Remember when I asked you what was the most important thing in the world?"

Derek's question reminded me of the similar deep talk we'd had two months ago.

"Do you know what's the most important thing in the world, Lila?"

"For everyone it's a different thing. But if we're gonna go by the trends then I'll humor you by saying 'love'."

He shot me a grin. "Quite right. But what kind of love?"

I rose a brow, tilting my head at him. "What kind?"

"Family kind." He spoke softly and clenched and unclenched his jaw. "They're the reason we're even here. Parents. And theirs is the first kind of love we experience

"Yeah, of course." I was curious as to why Derek was mentioning that and he answered my question soon after.

Derek sighed deeply. "I thought we had a good enough family if not perfect." He blinked, "You know how my mother is a photographer right? She does model shoots for magazines at times too."

I nodded once more.

"My father still.mangaed to take out time to spend with me and my sister but my mother was busy almost always." He chuckled humorlessly. "It wasn't like my dad was any less successful but we were his priority."

He glanced at me, "We were supposed to go for a family outing after months. Desiree and I were looking forward to it and so was our Dad."

I smiled encouragingly at him when I saw the hesitancy on his face.

I sure as hell hadn't been expecting him to open up to me but now that it seemed like we were headed that way, I wouldn't be aversed to knowing more of his story.

He closed his eyes and then continued, "We were going to pick my Mom up directly from the shoot she had that day but unfortunately halfway there it was apparent I had a bad fever." He chuckled wrly. "I'd know I was sick but I couldn't bear bear loose out on the outing."

"Sounds like Looney Tunes alright." I mused and Derek gave me a small smile.

"Anyways, Dad drove us back and my Mom had texted us that she wouldn't be able to make it for the outing. My dad texted her about me but she didn't respond. He called but again, there was no response. He figured she must be either busy or her phone dies or something."

I had a feeling about where this was headed and it made me feel awful but I didn't say anything except wait as Derek gathered his thoughts.

"Well.....I remember it was raining hard. And Desiree still wanted to go to the beach house. She actually had a fashion competition to attend there so we'd thought it would be like killing two birds with one stone. Plus we should'veleft already or we wouldn't make it."

"Dad was reluctant about leaving me what with my fever but then suddenly he received a voice message from Mom saying she'd be at home soon. It seemed like she hadn't checked any of our messages and thought we were all on our way to the beach. Dad finally left with Desi after giving me medicine and making sure I was fine. He had to go because of Desi's competition anyways."

"Your Dad sounds amazing." I gave him a wide smile and Derek nodded, a fond look adoring his face and I couldn't tear my eyes away from the joyous expression.

"Yeah, he is. I love him to bits." He grinned at me.

But then the expression dimmed until it was wiped away and all that remained was uncanny eerie silence and shadows that even the light of his flaming lighter couldn't chase away.

I dreaded what was to come.

"I was home alone. It was pouring outside. I wasn't completely asleep but with my head pouring and the medication working slowly, I felt drowsy."

I cringed slightly, knowing how that felt since I'd been alone quite a few times when I was sick and I hated it.

"Well, guess what happened?"

I shrugged, "You tell me, Derek."

He pursed his lips, a straight thin line that drew my eyes before the words snapped me back to reality. "Mom came home."

He looked me Dea din the eyes. "But she didn't come alone."

I sucked in a subtle breath and the puzzle pieces fell into place. Although I'd guessed it vaguely, the confirmation left a bitter taste in my mouth.

Derek kept his eyes on me as he reminisced, "I woke up when the door was slammed shut and the moans and frantic noises reached me." The walls he kept up were down for a few mere seconds and I saw the pain Derek hid well reflect in his copper eyes. "I was still so...drowsy and sick but she didn't come to me. I doubted she even knew. Or she wouldn't have come home with the model and fuck him right next door to me."

His expression was twisted with rage and pain and it made me want to comfort him however I could.

But he wasn't done. "All night long  Lila. They fucked all night long and I was right in the next room, in pain and sick and listening to my Mom cheating on my wonderful Dad with some one-night stand model."

He was breathing hard, his eyes a little crazed.

I masked my emotions and gave him the look he would best appreciate.

Blankness.

He closed his eyes in pain I could feel like a palpable thread reaching out to me.

I didn't say anything. I knew he wouldn't want me to either. All he wanted was to lighten his heart and if I could be that person for him, I would be honored.

I guess I understood him a little more now.

"You're so damn strong, badboy." I whispered and his eyes snapped to mine.

Searching.

And I let him.

I let my lips curl upwards as I told him the words no one probably had. Or even if they had, it would be different from what we both were sharing right now.

It wasn't sympathy he would find in my eyes. Or pity, loathing, disgust and above all, judgement. No.

He'd find acceptance.

Because it was what I looked for when I emptied out my heart to people like Diego and Cameron.

His eyes were intent on me and I had to swallow fown the lump in my throat at the tension that had built up.

"Thanks." His voice was hoarse but his eyes thankful for real.

That made my heart swell.

Could I be the same to him in some sense as Diego and Cam had been to me? A friend? A confidante?

Despite our differences....that really didn't sound so awful.

In fact.....it made me feel good to be there for him.

Derek wasn't so bad.

But then I always knew that. This wouldn't change his approach with me. I knew we'd be back to our usual selves within moments at best. But what would change would be the underlying sense of bonding.

And I realized...I didn't exactly dislike the fact that we seemed to have grown closer.

Derek had more secrets. I knew that but this was probably the start of it all. Those shadows in his eyes weren't inherent. They were induced by the actions of his mother.

The pressure of choosing to tell the truth and tear his family apart or choosing to stay a silent spectator and let it be a secret must have filled him with guilt that would feel crushing.

So he too would have, much like me, needed an escape.

And I was inclined to believe we both went for the same escape.

Using our fists and inflicting damage on others.

But thing was, I was almost sure Derek's escape led him down a rabbit hole beckoning him towards more of the damming darkness while mine opened me up to possibilities for revenge and people willing to pull me out if I went in a little too deep.

We had been silent for a while now but Derek looked.....confused.

Why.....I could only hazard a guess.

Derek took out a cig and played with it.

"Don't light it." I reminded him instinctively and he nodded with a dry smile.

"Yeah, I'll just be Augustus Waters with the cigarettes for the sake of it. Won't light them up." He grinned darkly.

I was a little surprised he could make the reference which would have to mean he had read The Fault In Our Stars.

Knowing that somehow made my heart skip a beat.

Guess I'm a sucker for men who know their books. Heh.

"You can be my Hazel if you want." And with Derek flirting with me using that line, I couldn't help my chuckle.

Guess the annoying Looney tunes was slowly clawing his way back up.

But what my chuckle hid was the way my heart poundeed a staccato beat and the heat that rose to my cheeks.

"Smooth, Greyson. Real smooth."

"Like butter." He smirked.

And I laughed. "BTS reference too?"

He simply shrugged, copper eyes blinking innocently.

I shook my head, "You're a lunatic."

"And you're my Kitkat." He winked and his smirk grew when his eyes spotted the way my cheeks flamed for unknown reasons.

•♤•

A/N

I hope you all enjoyed this light and heavy mix of a chapter. I sure loved writing it!

What are your thoughts on Derek now? And how about his chemistry with Lila? And the references and banter? I'd love to hear!

Anyways, don't forget to vote and comment please! I really appreciate it, you guys! And I have to work hard to finish this book before the next Wattys so hehe. You can be sure it'll be completed.

Till next time then, take care everyone!

~Skyler