I woke up and turned to my side to see the ruffled up blankets next to me. Did I do that? I didn't know I was that restless in my sleep. I sat up in my bed and looked around. This is not the room I fell asleep last night. Yet, it felt familiar. I pulled the covers off of me, swung my legs of the bed and stood up. I looked down at myself. I was older. I was taller, my hips were wider and I certainly wasn't as flat chested as I used to be. I spun around and looked in a nearby mirror. My hair was longer, and the pink color was slightly faded. I frowned at my image. I look thirty years old, last time I checked I was fourteen. I shook my head and turned and exited the bedroom. As soon as I closed the door behind me a little girl came running up to me with a piece of paper in her hands. She looked three or four and looked just like...Kid...

"Mommy! Mommy! Look at the picture I made!" I didn't know who this girl was but yet, I did. I picked her up and the looked at the drawing she made. All I could see was a square and a triangle but I knew it was an attempted drawing of a house. "See mom! I drew our house!"

"Yes, I see that, darling, it looks beautiful!" I said. The little girl beamed. She looked so proud. "Have you showed this to your father yet?" She shook her head. "Well, let's go find him, shall we?" I smiled back at the girl and called out her father's name. Kid's name.

"In here!" A voice called from another room. I walked towards where I heard Kid's voice and opened the door to see him sitting in a chair feeding a little baby boy. "Hey beautiful, what's up?" He said gazing at me the way he always used too.

"You have to see the drawing your daughter made!" I showed him the houses drawn on the piece of paper and he smiled at the little girl I was carrying in my arms.

"Looks like we have ourselves an artist in the family!" The girl giggled continuing to smile. "Hey who wants to go out for breakfast today?" The little girl cheered. "Well before we go you have to go get yourself dressed and ready." She squirmed out of my grip and ran down the hall to a room I assumed was her own. The raven haired boy stood up giggling and put the infant boy in a playpen and walked over to me. He leaned in and kissed me sweetly. "Morning, princess."

I woke up bawling.

That was my-  no. That was a future I could never have.

It's impossible for him to come back.

I keep trying to tell myself that. I keep forcing myself to think about other things, attempt to move on. There's this huge percentage of my brain that somehow believes it's possible for him to stand before me breathing, living. Maybe I can move past that today. See the reality. After all it is the day of his funeral. The last time I'll see him bruised face. I'll watch him be lowered six feet underground. Dirt thrown on top of his casket...it might be too much to bare.

What time is it...?

I looked over at the clock sitting on Kid's desk.

Dammit!

I sprung up out of bed and ran to the closet. I yanked out my only black dress and tossed it onto the bed. I grabbed my back of simple make-up off his desk and ran to the bathroom to quickly touch myself up. Covering up my few spots of acne and the deep dark circles under my eyes. I sprinted back to Kid's room sliding around on the wooden floor as I ran and slipped off my pajamas and slid on the dress. I quickly brushed my greasy hair and pulled it back into a ponytail.

I'm gonna be late!!! I can't be late!!!

It was noon. Kids funeral started at twelve-thirty exactly. It's going to take at least fifteen minutes to get there and there's going to be all these people I have to deal with. I don't know how to deal with people!

I slipped on some black combat boots and grabbed one of Kid's black zip up jackets and opened the door to reveal the school nurse standing in front of me.

"Hello Crona. I figured since we were both showing up to Death the Kid's funeral that I would give you a ride." She said to me with a small smirk on her face. Quite creepy to be honest. 

"H-how d-did you k-know I w-w-w-was here?"

"The school has your address, honey."

"I-I-I only j-just started l-l-living here..."

"The school is pretty on top of things. We know where someone had moved too only about three or four days after they moved."

"O-o-okay..."

"So, would you like to get a ride with me?"

"I-I uh g-guess..."

"Great! My car is out front, come child!" I nodded and trailed behind her as she headed for her car. I normally wouldn't catch a ride with others, but if I walked I would've been late.

"So Crona," She attempted conversation at me as soon as I got buckled up "I never got your last name."

"I u-uh d-don't know m-m-my last n-name m-ma'am."

"Oh well that's a shame. You always call me nurse or ma'am. Tell me Crona, what is with that?"

"I-I'm s-s-sorry ma'am, n-nurse, s-sir...I-I-I don't k-know y-your name..."

"That's alright, dear. You can call me Nurse Gorgon." I nodded and looked out the car window trying to avoid anymore conversation.

Every time a minute passed my throat burned up and I felt the brim of my eyes tearing up, but they never fell. Every minutes passed, was a another minute closer to my passed Kid. I really thought we had something going on between us. He told me he cared. He told me he loved me. He told me he would lie, he told me lots of things. Things it would still believe if he were alive. The only lie he told was that he'd never leave me. Of course, that couldn't be helped in the end.

"We've arrived!" Nurse Gorgon chimed.

Why are you so damn happy on a day like this?

I got out of the car and looked around.

"Nurse G-gorgon, a-a-are you sure t-this is the r-right p-place..? There a-aren't any c-c-cars..."

"What? You knew Kid had no friends. Of course no one else is here." I shot her a nasty glare. It was true he had no friends. But how rude was it that she has to point it out. "Anyway, his casket should be right thru those doors. I'll be there in a minute, I need to grab my purse."

"O-okay..." I shuffled towards the door and opened it walking in. Keeping my head down. Avoiding looking at the casket to keep from crying my eyes out. I knew it was going to be open casket...I'm not quite ready to see him again. See him for the last.
-----------------------------------------------
Eventually, the funeral came to an end. Everyone went home. Or...nurse Gorgon went home, being the only other person to show up. I watched them lower him into a pre-digged hole, bury him, put the grave up.

Here lies,
Death the Kid.
One without family,
But one with a loveing friend.
R.I.P
2001-2015

I didn't have any say in the quote on his grave. All I did was full out a sheet with questions on it. How he died, any relatives, friends. The quote could've been better. Maybe a bit longer. A bit more respectuful. A bit more memorable...

It was about five in the evening and I was still crying in front of his grave. I was most likely going to end up falling asleep next to his grave. Yes, it was only five, but being this depressed, crying this hard, really takes a toll on a body.

"Girl, you should head home. Crying ain't gonna get you nowhere." I turned around to see the scruffy man talking to me. "Did you hear me girly? Crying ain't gonna do you any good. Go home, no one should be at a cemetery this late by themselves." I didn't want to leave Kid, but it seems as if the cemetery owner was right. Staying here and crying won't do me any good. I should probably head home and get some sleep in an actual bed.

"A-a-a-a-a-a-alright s-sir..." I stood up then fell back down due to my weak knees.

"Seriously girl, you're crying yourself sick." He grabbed my arm and helped me up. "Now go home."

I shuffled my way out of the cemetery with no words. I shuffled down sidewalks and roads, around buildings and corners. I shuffled several blocks, dragging my feet.

The walk home was a blur. I don't remember dragging myself into the apartment complex. Or into the elevator. Or entering the apartment itself. I just remember plopping down in Kids bed and curling up in a ball and sleeping restlessly.

All I clearly remember is waking up with a pair of arms around me.