KHUSHI

"I missed you so much." He said as he broke the hug and cupped my face looking me into the eyes, and just staring at me as if he hadn't seen me for ages.

I wanted to tell him that I had missed him too and that there wasn't a day that had passed by without me thinking of him but I dint want to make a joke out of myself in case whatever he wanted to talk to me about was going to hurt me again.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" I asked.

"About us. I wanted to apologize for the way I acted, I know I might have hurt you but I ... I just needed time to figure things out Khushi, I really wished you had just given that to me... anyway that's all in the past... all this while I've been trying to talk to you so that I could tell you that you are the one for me, you are the one I want to be with and you are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I love you Khushi, I really do, and I am so sorry I wasn't able to tell you that when you needed to hear it the most but I am saying it now and I mean it, I really do."

Okay, this was a dream right? I mean, how? When? It dint make any sense, I had given up on my homes, I had literally begged him to love me and... I just thought it was never going to happen and now he was here telling me he loved me, it all felt so unreal.

"Khushi. Say something please."

"I... I don't know how to believe this."

"Hey... look at me, I mean it, I promise I really mean it, I love you and I am so sorry it took me so long to realize it but I love you so much... I wanted to come tell you about it the moment I realized it, I tried calling you and texting you and you wouldn't talk to me, I even came here but Manvi wouldn't let me in, I tried so much to explain to her that I wanted to talk to you but she wouldn't listen to me."

"When did you realize it?"

"The time I started texting you and calling you so that you could talk to me for once, I didn't want to say it over a text. I just... when you stopped talking to me completely, it broke my heart, I couldn't do without talking to you or seeing it, I felt some sort of ache in my heart and I just knew, if I couldn't go even a week without seeing you or talking to you then how was I going to spend my whole life without you? That's what made me realize that whatever I felt for you was too deep, I couldn't give it any other name apart from love.

I know after everything that happened it must be hard for you to believe me, and it might sound unreal but please believe me, I really do love you Khushi."

I looked at him silently, my eyes were so moist I was going to end up crying anytime now, I had been dying to hear these words for him, and today he had said them, I was so overwhelmed that a part of me just dint want to believe that this could be real, but seeing him here and him assuring me repeatedly that it was real made me want to believe it.

This was our chance, to be together once again, to not just date and see where it goes but to date because we were in love and because we saw a future with each other... I wanted this, I begged him for this and now that it was actually happening, I dint know how to react to it.

"But... you chose Sonakshi over me Arnav..." That's all I could think of, he was in love with me but he kept her first, it was like she was always going to come first to him.

"I didn't Khushi and you know that, you are the one that asked me to make a choice, I wasn't even willing to break up with you, all I asked for was time, to clear my head out, I even told her that I had a girlfriend, if I chose her why would I tell her I have a girlfriend Khushi?

If I chose her, I would have broken up with you, I didn't. if I chose her I would have told you that in clear words, I didn't. I never chose her Khushi.

"Yeah, but you didn't choose me either."

"I chose you, over and over again, I chose only you. I might have not acted like it or told you that but me not willing to break up with you was a clear sign that I chose you wasn't it? I know I messed up, I wish I wouldn't have but I can't go back it time and change things, I can apologize for it and here I am, doing that, I am sorry for hurting you, you know that was never my intention.

When Sonakshi came back, everything fell apart, it was like I lost my ability to think, I just needed time to digest everything and think clearly." He said.

He was right to a point, it wasn't just his mistake, it was mine too but I was so scared, when Sonakshi showed up and everyone acted like I didn't exist, I got scared, for me that was it, I thought I had lost him forever and so I forced him to choose between her and me.

"Khushi, please love me?" He went down on his knees, held my hands and just looked at me making a puppy face.

"I am scared Arnav." I said as finally the tears I had been holding back came rolling down, all this was just so overwhelming.

"Scared of what?" he asked.

"Everything that happened recently, it was the worst kind of pain I felt, I've never felt anything like it before and it scares me that you have so much power over me, it scares me that if I give you that chance again and you hurt me again, I won't be able to survive it."

"Please don't say that... I can't promise not to hurt you, I am a human being I know I'll make mistakes that might end up hurting you but I can promise never to hurt you this much. I am really sorry, I didn't do it on purpose, please forgive me for it, please give me one more chance? I really do love you and I know you love me too, and we've both been miserable this whole time without each other so why can't we just choose to be happy with each other instead of being like this?"

"You are right, we can choose to be happy and I am willing to choose our happiness and choose us and like you said, you can't promise not to hurt me and I get that, I know I might do things to hurt you too but you have to understand this is way deeper for me. If you really want us to be together, you will have to make a promise to me and keep it."

"Anything." He said immediately.

"You have to promise me that no matter what, you will not let Sonakshi come between us, ever again. I know you have grown up with her, she's your best friend and your families are connected but if you ever let her come in between us, that would be the end of us. I don't want to feel like I'm competing with her in this relationship."

"I promise, if you ever feel something like that is happening, talk to me and I promise to make you feel secure in all ways possible. Look, Sonakshi will always be a part of my life but she would just be like a friend, I promise she wouldn't mean anything more than that to me. You are my everything now Khushi."

"Okay." I nodded.

"So... is everything fine between us now? If there's anything still bothering you, you can tell me."

"Nothing that I can think of... just please don't hurt me like this again." I pouted.

"I won't." He assured me.

We both stood there awkwardly staring at each other, we had just solved all the issues between us and now neither of us really knew how to act about it. It was just a bit awkward.

Sometime back if someone would have told me that I would have forgiven Arnav so easily, I wouldn't have believed them, I had been so hurt but with time, things just started to fall in place, and after everything that NK said last night, I realized that it wasn't only Arnav's fault, but mine too.

I wouldn't blame this whole situation just on him, but I wouldn't blame myself for reacting the way I did, I loved him and I reacted that way because I was scared to lose him and I felt like I was going to lose him.

"So... can I take you out for a date tonight?"

"So quick huh?" I laughed.

"I just... I can't explain but I'm sure you know it because you went through the same thing. It was just so hard to be without you, I didn't know I had gotten so attached to you, it took you going away from me for me to realize it but I don't want to feel like that anymore, I want to be with you every chance possible. I want to make everything right between us so we can go back to how we were before."

"Okay, fine. Date tonight." I nodded in agreement.

He just stood there staring at me for a while, I had agreed to go on a date with him now, I wondered what he was still thinking about.

"What?" I asked.

"I... I just can't believe you forgave me so easily, I had hurt you pretty bad, I came here thinking you would throw me out or punch me in the face or something like that." He said.

"I am just tired Arnav... I really don't have the energy to drag this on, we are both hurt enough for me to drag this on and keep hurting us. The fact remains to be that I still love you and you love me and we are doing this, but just because I forgave you easily doesn't mean it's going to be all easy.

The whole problem between us was Sonakshi and as long as you've promised me that she won't be a problem between us again, I am good. If she becomes a problem again, I would leave and no amount of convincing will bring me back."

"Wow, my girlfriend is threatening me." He pouted.

"I am not, I am just looking out for myself, this is your second chance, I don't do third chances. So it's now or never, don't mess it up just because I forgave you easily."

"I won't. Can we please now stop being so serious? Life has been too serious for quite a while now, I just need some peace and fun. Can I meet the Khushi that talks nonstop about random things that make her happy tonight? I promise I will even listen to how much you love Darshan Raval on repeat." He laughed making me laugh too.

Oh how I missed obsessing over Darshan Raval, I had been in so much pain I had forgotten about a lot of things that made me happy, I don't remember the last time I had talked like my usual self, after everything that happened, I had become so silent, but I was glad that everything was finally getting back to normal.

I couldn't wait for it to go back to the way it was before, just him and me, on our stupid romantic dates, me talking nonstop and him listening to me and looking fascinated.

"Okay, now go to work and don't get drunk, I don't like drunk Arnav." I said as I looked at the watch, I also had to get going to work, I had weddings to plan.

"You haven't even met drunk Arnav." He rolled his eyes.

"But I talked to him over the phone last night and I figured I wouldn't want to meet him." I joked.

"Just say you were worried as to why I was so drunk, it's okay, we are back together, you can be worried about me."

"Fine, don't overdrink, it was stupid."

"Oh yeah? What about the time you did it at the club? That was very clever."

"Shut up and go away." I laughed. We both had been so stupid but what can I say, pain makes people stupid, or we just trying to not feel the pain and do whatever we can to stop feeling it, in both our cases, it looked like it was getting drunk.

"Okay, I'm going. I'll see you tonight." He smiled as he headed towards the door, he took a few steps towards it then stopped and turned around and then came rushing back to me immediately, it happened so fast the only thing I realized was when his lips touched mine.

Oh... the way he kissed me, with his tongue exploring all corners of my mouth and him biting my lips lightly, it was so full of love and passion and it really showed how much he had missed me and I had missed him too. I tugged on his hair and kissed him back with the same passion.

A few moments later, he pulled apart and looked at me nervously.

"I'm sorry, I didn't even know if you wanted it, you might have wanted to wait after everything but... I couldn't. I just needed this to be sure we were okay." He said.

"We are Arnav... it's just a kiss, relax, it's normal. But everything else is going to be slow." I said, just to warn him so he wouldn't get any other ideas, I know before Sonakshi came back we were at a point where we were ready to be with each other so intimately, but after everything that happened, I had to look out for myself and I knew it was going to take long before I got back there.

"I know, I just missed you. Anyway, I'll get going, see you tonight." He said nervously as he walked away immediately.

Things were going to be awkward for a while I guess, but I was sure they were going to get better with time.