I Promise I'll Stop

For silverflyer

WARNING: this does have actions of self-harm and suicidal thoughts. If this will affect you badly please don't read! I don't want any of you to get hurt!

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You are both 16

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You stared at a special floor board in your room. You haven't opened it in two days, but it was driving you crazy. You were trying to stop something very bad that you did on a daily basis.

Cutting.

Nobody knew your secret. Not even your beloved boyfriend, Hiccup, and you didn't plan on telling him either. Or anybody else for that matter.

He almost found out your secret, two days ago, which is why you decided to stop for a while, but it was a bad addiction that you were used to doing daily.

With a audible sigh, you finally gave up, walking to the loose floor board and prying it open. A shiny sharp knife and beautiful sapphire necklace reviled themselves.

The necklace belonged to your late mother, who had died a year ago in a nasty pirate raid. Your entire village burned down in the dancing flames, teasing you as you sailed away from your old island.

The horrid memories rarely ever went away... until something else made it.

You slowly picked up the knife and stared at it for a long minute. But at long last, the memories were to painful and to be rid of them was your deepest desire. You pulled the long sleeve of your brown shirt up, revealing the hundreds of cuts on one arm.

As the knife pressed into your soft flesh, you took a deep breath and slowly move the blade up your arm. The physical pain making the memories and emotional pain disappear. The physical pain coming to the front of your mind.

You slowly made one more cut up your arm, right next to the other one.

You squeezed your eyes closed as the pain crept up your arm, but continued cutting.

You were so caught up in your little 'activity' you didn't realize that someone had knocked on your door, or that they had walked into your room until they took the knife out of your hand and gently picked you up and moving you to the medicine, which you kept in a basket in the kitchen.

When they finally set you down on a chair you saw who had stopped you.

Hiccup.

He didn't say anything, he just cleaned your self- inflicted wounds. You didn't object or try to stop him, knowing it was probably make him angrier. Oh, how angry he must be.

Once he was done with that arm he pulled up your other sleeve, worry and sadness- not anger though- filled his emerald green eyes as he cleaned those wounds as well. In a matter of minutes he finished.

"Is there anywhere else?" he asked, sadly, not looking into your eyes. You took this as a bad sign.

You didn't say anything, just lifted your shirt a bit to show the cuts on your stomach. He gasped before cleaning them. Whatever he was cleaning your wounds with burned but you knew it would be pointless to try and stop him. He was the chief's son and was going to be chief someday in the future as well. But since he was only sixteen he didn't have to worry about that for a few years.

Once he was done you put your shirt back. He looked into your (E/C) eyes with green, sad, worried ones.

Thinking he wanted an explanation you started, "Hiccup I-"

"Hush, now. It isn't your fault. It's mine for not noticing sooner." He blamed this on himself, for that you felt even more guilty.

"It isn't your fault, Hiccup. I'm the one who did it. I just can't stand the memories and-"

Hey, important author's note at the end of this. Please read. You can go back to the story now~

"I understand," he interrupted, gently, his voice almost breaking as sobs almost consumed him. This wasn't the time for him to break down though, he needed to be strong. For you. "And I'm going to help you. I know it won't be easy, but I will help you. We will overcome this together. I love you, (Y/N). Just please, stop doing this to yourself," he begged, his beautiful emerald green eyes threatened to spill tears.

"I'm sorry, Hiccup," you cried. He quickly wrapped his arms around you and allowed you to cry on his shoulder, ruining his green shirt. He didn't mind though, you knew that. He just wanted you safe and happy. And, even though it was hard work for both of you, he did. "I promise I'll stop," you managed to tell him through your crying.

*** 6 years later ***

You smiled at the sight of your husband and child playing together.

Hiccup had you move in with him the day after he found out your secret, that way he could be by your side all the time.

Although you slipped a few times, after 4 long months you were cut free and Hiccup couldn't be prouder of you.

Now your held you beautiful baby girl in your arms. She was just weeks old and had her father's beautiful emerald green eyes.

Your two year old son ran up to you, followed by your loving husband, Hiccup. He was now chief of Berk but had taken the day off to spend time with his growing family. He struggled with being chief at first but quickly got the hang of things.

"Hey, beautiful," he said with your favorite grin. He placed a gentle kiss on your cheek, then one on the beautiful baby girl in your arms. "Y'all are both beautiful. My two beautiful girls," he said.

"Mine too!" your son said, hands on your knees.

"Of course!" you said, happy to see the smile on his adorable and slightly chubby face.

You laughed, enjoying the rare warm, sunny day on Berk. You looked around the cove- where Hiccup had taken y'all- and watched as your husband and son played in the shallow area of the pond, splashing each other. Oh, how you loved this sight.

You closed your eyes and tilted your head up, feeling the sun's warm your skin. Suddenly you couldn't feel the sun, or see it under your eyelids. Frowning you open your eyes to see someone grinning at you from above, making you smile once again.

"Hey, sweet girl," he said.

"Hey, handsome," you said back.

He placed a gentle kiss upon your lips then pulled back, chuckling. "You're so beautiful." He got lost in your (E/C) eyes and you got lost in his emerald green ones.

"Mommy, look!" your son said, pulling you both back to reality. He held a flower in his small, little hand. "It's for you."

"Aw, thank you!" you said, taking it. "Ah, it's so pretty. I love it!"

After an awesome day, you all walked back home.

Once you put the kids to bed you laid down in bed, using Hiccup as a pillow.

He lifted up your arm and pulled up the sleeve. He traced the light scars that covered your arms and stomach.

He frowned at the memory then placed a gentle kiss on your wrist before smiling at you.

"Thank you," you told him, once again.

He knew what you meant. "You have nothing to thank me for."

"Yes I do. If you hadn't stopped me I probably would have ended it all, not being able to take all the pain," you said, looking at your arm.

He frowned again, before putting a finger under your chin and making you look into his beautiful eyes. "Please don't think that. I hate to think of what could have happened if I hadn't..." He trailed off, searching for the right word.

"Caught me?"

"No. Helped you," he corrected, placing a kiss on the tip of your nose, then another on your lips.

"Thank you," you repeated.

"Anytime, my beautiful, sweet girl." You started to drift off to sleep, but not before you heard, "I love you, (Y/N). Always have, always will. Forever and always."

You fell asleep in the love of your life arms, smiling and happy.

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