"Kailan ang alis mo?"

"Today. After we... after we talk," alanganing sagot ni Mia kay Chino bago muling itinuon ang kanyang mga mata sa madilim pa beach ng Emerald Paradise Resort kung saan sila naroon.

Kaka-alas-singko pa lamang ng madaling araw. Ngunit nang i-text niya Chino may isang oras na ang nakararaan, agad siya nitong pinuntahan doon. Kung sabagay, noon pa man, hindi niya ito mahirap pakiusapan.

Matalik na magkakaibigan ang kanilang mga magulang kaya lumaki din silang malapit sa isa't-isa ni Chino. Noong nabubuhay pa ang Mama niya, madalas silang mag-picnic sa mismong beach na 'yon tuwing weekend. Favorite nilang gawin ni Chino doon ang gumawa ng sand castles o kaya naman ang pagkolekta ng seashells. Pero ang pinakapaborito niya siguro ay 'yong nag-camping sila doon at nanood ng meteor shower. Mapait siyang ngumiti nang maalala na lahat ng magagandang alaalang iyon ng kanyang kabataan, naroon si Chino. At lalo siyang na-guilty sa ginagawa niya ngayon sa kababata dahil hindi nito deserve ang masaktan. All the more that the pain is coming from her.

She just told him that she'll be leaving for Chicago to establish herself there and learn to live on her own. Away from the mocking and disappointed eyes of her family who had been too hard on her ever since her mother passed away two years ago. She grieved too hard and lost her sense of direction. She quit med school and had quit on four jobs in a span of two years. She's a mess. Has been a mess even more when Lucas, her boyfriend of two years, dumped her six months ago for another woman.

"Is it because of Lucas?" Nihimigan niya ang hinanakit sa tinig nito. "May sinabi ba siya sa 'yo? Bakit ba-"

"It's not about him, Chino," putol niya sa kababata. Nagbuga siya ng hininga at marahang inihagod ang kamay sa kanyang buhok. "I really want to be away for a while. To reassess my life. To start anew. To be away from... from everything that bothers me."

"To be away from me?"

"O-of course, not you. God! Of all people not you. But-"

"Nakita ko kayong nag-uusap noong isang araw sa parking lot ng mall," deklara nito. His sad questioning eyes were looking at her.

"Y-you're there?" bulong niya.

Marahan itong tumango. "I was there the whole time."

Nataranta siya. "S-sabi mo masama ang pakiramdam mo? B-bakit hindi mo 'ko nilapitan? Sana-"

"Ayaw ko kayong istorbohin. I knew, he's been meaning to talk to you, ayaw mo lang. But when you left crying after you talked, alam ko nang hindi ka na sisipot sa date night natin. That's why I texted you I can't make it para hindi mo na ako alalahanin."

"Chino..." Hindi na niya alam kung ano ang dapat niyang sabihin. Lalong lang bumigat ang dibdib niya sa nalaman. How can a messed up woman like her deserve a boyfriend like Chino?

Napahagulgol na siya sa sobrang kalituhan. Just a little over two months ago, Chino admitted his feelings towards her and asked her to try loving him.

"I won't ask you anything. Just let me love you the way you should be loved." That's what he told her.

A rebound relationship, that's what she gave Andrius Chino Abrera, her bestfriend of 25 years. She knew it was unfair for Chino. But in the end, she agreed.

The past two months with Chino was a bliss. They traveled together. They've dated almost every day. They even enrolled to an art class together, a thing she had been meaning to do for years now. With Chino, she didn't need to pretend. She can be herself and he'd embrace her fully- flaws, imperfections and everything in between. For the past two months, she lived and breathed easy. Not until Lucas came to her the other night and wanted her back. Then, the confusion started again. Pulling her back to where she was once was six months ago. Back to that deep yet miserable quest for acceptance. Back to that intense you-and-me-against-the-world love she had felt for Lucas. Back to all the crazy. Back to all the mess.

"Tell me, Mia. Siya pa rin ba? Si Lucas pa rin ba ang mahal mo?"

Muli siyang napahikbi. "I... I don't know, Chino."

Marahan nitong ginagap ang kamay niya. "What about me? Have you... have you love me yet?"

She felt his pain more than she heard it. She can't answer the question. There will be more confusion if she tries. "Please, Chino..." Muli siyang napahagulgol.

Maya-maya pa, marahan siya nitong kinabig payakap. Itinuloy niya ang pag-iyak sa dibdib nito habang masuyo nitong hinahaplos ang kanyang likod.

"I-I don't deserve you Chino."

"That's not for you to decide." Masuyong tinuyo ng kamay nito ang kanyang luha. "I don't want to see you cry, Mia. If you can't answer my question now, I'm fine with it. If you want to leave, hindi rin kita pipigilan. Whatever you want to do after this, I won't say a word. Just promise me one thing, kapag handa ka nang sagutin ang tanong ko, kapag sigurado ka na sa sagot mo, you'll come back to me and tell me."

Alanganin niya itong tiningala. "C-Chino..."

"Whether it's a yes or a no, just come back to me and tell me."

Maya-maya pa, kinuha nito ang kamay niya at may inilagay doon. Nang buksan niya ang palad niya, naroon ang hugis pagong na keychain na gawa sa seashells. She saw one of those when they traveled together to Hundred Islands last month. One of her best memories of summer.

"I will wait here, Mia. I won't go away."

Ni hindi niya nagawang sumagot. Isang hikbi at mahigpit na yakap, iyon lang iniwan niya kay Chino bago siya tuluyang umalis nang araw na iyon.

_____________

"Graceful pa rin talagang sumayaw si Mrs. Abrera."

"She's a natural born dancer, even before. Siguro paglabas ng baby niya, magaling din sumayaw."

Napakagat-labi si Mia nang marinig ang pag-uusap na 'yon ng mga bisita sa hall sa kinaroroonan niya. Late siyang nakarating sa event, kaya nasa bandang likuran na siya pumuwesto.

Nang muli niyang ibaling ang mga mata sa dancefloor, hindi na niya napigilan pa ang mapaluha. Nasa dancefloor si Chino, masuyong kasayaw si Chelsea, ang Mrs. Abrera na tinutukoy ng mga kasama niyang bisita at ex-girlfriend ni Chino noong college.

Hindi niya lubos akalain na sa dalawang taon niyang paninirahan sa Chicago, ito ang madaratnan niya sa wedding reception na iyon ng common friend nila ni Chino.

Her homecoming was supposed to be a surprise for her family and friends. Ni isa wala siyang pinagsabihan. In fact, mula sa airport ay dumiretso siya sa Emerald Paradise, kung saan ginaganap ang event. Tumawag siya sa bahay ng mga Abrera, ang mommy ni Chino ang sumagot. Sabi nito naroon na raw ito sa reception. Ni hindi pa nga siya umuuwi sa kanila. She just changed her dress and fixed herself inside her rented car. She was so excited to see Chino. Dalawang taon din niyang tinikis ang sarili na 'wag mag-reply sa mga messages o tawagan ito man lang. Baka kasi kapag narinig niya ang boses nito, mag-alsa-balutan na naman siya sa Chicago at umuwi na lang sa Pilipinas. Ayaw niyang bumalik kay Chino na hindi pa siya buo at puno pa ang buhay niya ng 'siguro'. Chino loved her at her worst, but that doesn't mean he can't have her at her best. So, she focused on her healing and self-rediscovery. She soon found her comfort and solace in the arts. She's now an art curator in a gallery in Chicago.

Pero mukhang masyadong matagal bago niya na-achieve ang gusto niyang pagbabago sa sarili niya. Late na 'ata ang kanyang pagbabalik. Because now, Chino was all smiles slow-dancing with Chelsea who is very much pregnant.

Chino has moved on... happily, without her.

Nagbuga siya ng hininga bago umalis sa reception hall. Tinungo niya ang shore, on the very same spot where he left Chino brokenhearted two years ago.

"I will wait here, Mia. I won't go away."

Muling tumulo ang luha niya nang maalala ang pangako ni Chino. Tumingala siya sa madilim na kalangitan. Siguro parusa na 'yon ng langit sa kanya. For being too selfish. For hurting Chino.

"What are you doing here? The party's inside."

Napasinghap siya at nilingon ang nagsalita. It was Chino, looking at her intently, displaying his warm smile.

She bit her lip. Oh how she missed him. She wanted so much to ran to him and bury herself to the warmth of his embrace. But she can't do that now. She had lost that right two years ago. Pinagmasdan niya ito habang unti-unti itong naglakad palapit sa kanya. She felt her heart hitched when he finally settled himself beside her. Seeing him that close, made her long for him more.

"Hindi ka na sumagot. Are you okay?" untag nito sa kanya maya-maya.

"H-ha?" She cleared her throat and blinked her tears away. "I-I'm okay," aniya bago alanganing umatras. "W-we better go back inside. Hindi magandang nakikita ng iba na tayo lang dalawa-."

"How are you, Mia," anito na parang 'di narinig ang sinabi niya.

"I'm... I'm doing good," aniya sa pinasayang tinig. She wanted to sound casual, as if her heart was not grieving. "I-Ikaw? K-kumusta ka? Congratulations to you and C-Chelsea. W-who'd ever thought kayo rin pala sa huli. Crazy right? H-how far along is she?" Hindi agad ito sumagot at tumitig lang sa kanya. Nailang siya sa pagtitig nito kaya ibinalik niya ang tingin sa madilim na dagat.

"I don't know. Six or seven months, I guess. I'm not sure. Hayaan mo tatanungin ko kay Simon pag-uwi niya from Davao."

Kunot-noo siyang bumaling dito."Simon Abrera? 'Yong pinsan mo?"

Tumango ito. "Yes, Simon, my cousin married Chelsea two years ago."

Natigilan siya sa rebelasyon nito. "Y-you mean..."

"I'm not married, Mia if that's what you're thinking. Ibinilin lang ni Simon sa akin si Chelsea kasi wala siyang kasama tonight." Ngumiti ito. "Kaya ka ba malungkot dahil akala mo asawa ko si Chelsea?"

Marahan siyang tumango bago hinayang malaglag ang kanyang mga luha. "I thought... I thought... I'm too late."

Inabot nito ang kanyang pisngi bago masuyong pinalis ang kanyang luha. "The dress looks good on you. Naibinigay din pala ni Auntie Nena sa 'yo. I hope the handbag reached you too."

Napasinghap siya. "The gifts for my past birthdays came from you?"

"I told your aunt not to tell you it's from me."

Napuno ng tuwa ang dibdib niya. Gaya niya, hindi rin pala ito nakalimot sa loob ng dalawang taong magkahiwalay sila.

"It's been two years, Mia." Alanganin itong ngumiti bago siya pinakatitigan. "So... have you love me yet?"

Naluluha niyang kinuha mula sa kanyang purse ang pagong na keychain na ibinigay nito sa kanya bago siya umalis. Kinuha niya ang kamay nito at nilagay doon ang keychain.

"It took me a while... but I did get there," humihikbing pahayag niya bago siya nag-angat ng tingin. "I always thought that love is an effort. An effort to be in your best form at all times. That love vanishes when flaws appear and take-over. But with you, I never need to hide nor pretend. You've loved me just the same even if I'm a mess. You showed me that love never demands for everything but rejoices in something, even in the few, and in the little. You showed me that love is easy. That it doesn't need to be great. It just needed to be true. And now I am sure, I love only you, Engr. Andrius Chino Abrera."

In one swift move, Chino claimed her lips for a kiss. The kiss tasted of love and happy tomorrows.

"Thank you for coming back, Mia," anito nang matapos ang halik.

Muli siyang napaluha. "Thank you for waiting for me, Chino."

Mabilis nitong kinintalan ng halik ang kanyang labi. "Love made the waiting easy. I love you, my Karamia. Always and forever." ###