♪This can't be happening to me. This is just a dream...♪

It was a week after the day of the terrorist attacks in Paris. I was all dressed in black, going to school that week. High schoolers looked at me weirdly and teased me being emo or goth, but I didn't care. Most of my friends are gone... My best friend is missing. Her boyfriend is missing. And the man I loved before was also missing.

I wish it was all just a dream...

My close friends in class were concerned and when they realized what was going on with my new sense of style and they tried to comfort me. No matter how much they told me they'll be okay and everything else, I knew that they were lying.

"Tiffany, I'm so sorry," Kristen sadly apologized and hugged me tight.

"They'll be okay. We have faith in them," Brittany smiled sadly, trying to comfort me.

"Are you okay? Oh dear, I can't believe this is happening to you," Camilla said as she patted my hand gently.

"I'm so sorry for your loss Tiff, but there's hope Natalie will be out there," Kayla softly smiled and hugged me close, stroking my head.

"Stay strong for them," Anna said, looking at me sadly.

As they continued to try and comfort me, I just sat there, blankly and motionless. Most people called me emotionless when seeing me like this and it was the first time they ever saw me in this state. All I could ever think about with Natalie, Alex, and Kyle. They were a part of me...

If they were go- no. They're out there somewhere. But where?

Three days in school has pasted and my grades were dropping slowly. Ever since that devastating day, it affected my education. My fellow classmates were surprised and my teachers were concerned, so during Spanish class, my teacher told me to go to the guidance. I didn't want to talk to them about my situation, but under her pleadings and worries, I went.

I met up with my guidance counselor and looking at the woman in front of me, I knew that she got a hunch on everything I'm going through. As I enter her office, she sat down in her chair as I sat right across from her, trying to be strong so I can go back to class.

"Tiffany," she started. "I heard from many of your teachers that your grades are dropping."

I simply just looked at her. I knew my grades were different, but only because I couldn't concentrate.

"Learning this from your teachers, I talked with some of your peers about what's going on with you," she said looked at me.

"I..."

Tears were forming in my eyes as all the memories of my friends in Paris that had passed ran through my mind.

"Tiffany? Are you okay?"

"My best friend might be dead," I cried. My voice cracked and tears streamed down my face.

I swear that I looked terrible and disgusting, but that wasn't the concern.

"I heard. May I asked how?" the counselor asked.

"You know the terrorist attacks in Paris, right?" I said, stuttering my words. "Most of my friends are dead. My best friend is missing. Her brother is missing. And her boyfriend is missing."

"Oh my. I can see why you're so upset and distracted."

"I'm just scared that they might be dead. I don't want them to be."

"Well, have you confirmed any of your friends and their names?"

"No, but I heard it from a close friend of mine and my best friend's two oldest brothers."

"Hmm. I see. I don't know since there's a lot of bodies to identify and there's not the official documentation of the victims list. However, I'm sure that they're out there somewhere."

"I don't know. My best friend, Natalie and her boyfriend, Alex had plans after being at the restaurant for their date. I'm not sure if they left before the attacks. Her brother, Kyle, on the other hand, left for a walk on that morning and never came back."

"Oh... Well I'm with you on that, but maybe if you have faith and have hope that they are alive, then they might show up."

"You think so?"

The lady nodded. "Yes. In fact, I recommend if you write down your thoughts and feelings on a piece of paper and read it to her brothers. I'm sure they're in pain just like you."

I wiped my tears. "I'll try and do that."

"Good." She looked up at the clock. "I'm afraid we have to end this, since I have a meeting in two minutes."

"That's fine."

"You're taking Honors classes, right?"

"Yes."

"Hmm. Well I hope my advice will help a bit and hopefully you can try and concentrate better in your classes."

"Thank you."

"I'll write a pass for you to see me tomorrow, ok? Try and keep me updated with the situation."

After that, I try to focus in Geometry, but all I could think of was Kyle. It was strange since I would've think about either Natalie or Chris, but Kyle...

I hope you're okay.

"Thoughts & Feelings on Natalie"

"Natalie Rose Lin Taylor wasn't just an ordinary girl. She was someone special to the world. Special to her school. Special to her family. Special to her pets. And special to me. She's the youngest heir for the Taylor business her father left for his children before he passed away. People may think of her as a popular, girl, rich, beautiful, amazing, perfect, intelligent, lovable, clueless, caring, a guy magnet, cat lover, teacher's pet, artist, captain of the cheerleaders, player, and other things that many will describe her, but that's not how I think of her. She's my twin sister that God send down for me. She's my guardian angel. She's my best friend. She's my other half. She's my spiritual sister. She's my partner. She's my everything. God made us seek each other and I was very, very, very blessed to have met her. She's the best human being I've ever met. There would be no one that could ever replace her from my heart. And in truth, I love her more than my family and friends here. Why? She's was my other half. She was what my heart wants and I felt like her other half to Natalie too. She was just like me and I was just like her. We understand each other like no one ever knows. We were similar... We were twins by God. Our love and bond as spiritual sisters didn't stop us from contact by our families, friends and the long distance between us. We were strong as one. Even if we were single or dating, we would always be together through our lives. Even if we were busy and the time zones were different, we would always think of each other and eventually, we would have our sister time together and nothing can stop that from happening. She was different than all my friends I know. She's the first person that didn't betray me and left me unlike others who did. Some used me. Some tricked me. Some made a fool out of me. But Natalie was someone I'll never forget and abandon. She was precious to her family and she's precious to me. We both changed each others' lives after the day we first met. If I haven't met Natalie... I would've, I don't know. All I could say is that I would've been miserable and done horrible things to myself. She helped me with my heartbreak. She helped me with family problems. She helped me find love. She helped me change my style. Change my attitude. Change my life. She introduced me to her family and her friends, something that no one here with me does. Her family was wonderful, loving, caring, helpful and magnificent. Her friends were sweet, hilarious, thoughtful, and comforting. I was glad I met all the people that were close to her, because I created more friends that we're just like her, but not exactly like her. She trusted me with her life, unlike me who was hiding my family from her and making things complicated. I just don't want anyone to get to know me that much. My life is complicated and everyone makes fun of it. But Natalie understood and was patient. She's a part of me and if she's gone, then I'm gone. We made a promise and our bond will forever stay strong. I love Natalie, my greatest bestest friend, angel, sister and twin. And I hope she feels the exact same way."

"Thoughts & Feelings on Alex"

"Alexander Nathan Anthony Daniels wasn't just my best friend's boyfriend, the vice captain of the basketball team, a future lawyer in his family, but he was also a close friend of mine. There's not much to say about Alex because he's indescribable. He's many things and the one things that stands out about him is his love for his girlfriend, Natalie. Oh boy, don't get me started on him. He loves her so much, that he's willing to take her away from me when she and I are having our rare sister time. He's just lucky that I'm letting him get away with it. I heard many things about him, not just his feelings for his wonderful girlfriend, but he have this dedication that's so great that no one here in my high school have. He dedicates himself to the things he love like basketball and his education in law. A law degree isn't easy to receive, but with his dedication to his work, I know that he'll make it and earn it in no time. Back to the best friend stealer himself, I have never seen a boyfriend that close to their own girlfriend. Well maybe, like Natalie's older brothers, Will and Chace, but yeah. He's loves Natalie so much that he'll do anything for her. He loves to talk about her with me and I couldn't turn him down. I would always see his eyes sparkle with love and happiness just by the thought of Natalie. That's a perfect boyfriend feature right there. Alex isn't just my close friend, but I call him my brothers, along with Natalie's older brothers, besides Kyle... Kyle... He's a different story. Alex loves me too, as a sister that is and even though he doesn't have a biological sister, I was a sister to him by spirit due to God. No matter what, I hope Alex protects his girlfriend, who's my best friend. I have trust and faith in him. I trust him with my best friend's life, because she's now in his hands. I pray that he'll bring back Natalie and himself safe and sound. Come home my brother. I need to have some of your memories with Natalie when you were little or whatever. I don't care if he is on high or crazy... I just want him to come home."

"Thoughts & Feelings on Kyle"

"Kaoru Colin Paul Taylor, my best friend's third oldest brother, the youngest of the Taylor Brothers, the third heir in the Taylor business and the man that I love most. Yes, I know that I said that and some may think that I'm lying, but I'm telling the truth. No more hiding and being complicated. Here's the full out truth. I love Kyle, not Chris. Chris will forever have a special place in my heart like he did for me, but Kyle is forever my everything. He's the light that guides me and I follow. The darkness that traps me. The star that sparkles in the dark sky. The moon that shines the brightest. The sun that's hot and beautiful. The sound of my beating heart. The vision that makes me see. The warmth that I feel and touch. The aroma that I smell. The waves that I hear in the ocean. The fire that brings life. The trees that makes me breathe. The music I listen to all the time. The echoes in the wind at night. The water that meets the sky. The day after the next. The key to my heart. The gate to my soul. My friends always say that Chris still have feelings for me and that Chrisany should always be together, forever and ever, but that's false. Chris and I were once a thing and the best thing for just nine months then we moved on. Chris is with someone new and someone better and perfect. I was single till I met him... the man that has a crush on me. My secret admirer. My bad boy. My playboy. My love. My best friend's brother. My boyfriend. My fiancé. I wish I could change and erase the past. He was a true boyfriend. The perfect boyfriend. He would do anything to make me happy. He sacrifices everything just to make me happy and to make himself the perfect one for me. However... Sadly, a lot has broken the two of us apart, one is Jessica and the other is Chris, but that doesn't stop me from loving you. The feelings I have for Chris is slowly fading away as we were just now best friends, but my feelings for Kyle... They are indescribable. Maybe much more than Chris'. I don't know. All I know is that I love this man. I love him a lot. I love him from the sea and back. Everest and back. The moon and back. Pluto and back. The universe and galaxies. To the Olympus. To heaven and back. To infinity and beyond. I regret all that I have done to make him suffer. Make him cry. Angry. Distanced. Miserable. Heart-Broken. I'll do anything to get him back. He gave me away, when I didn't want to be, just so I could be happy. I remembered his words clearly. 'That's love. Sacrificing yourself for the happiness of your loved one.' I love him so much and I thought I was the one for him, but he gave me away...No matter how much Kyle would be distance and push me away, I'll always try to be close to him, because I love him. I promised to never leave him. Never let him go. And to love him forever and ever. And it will stay that way. I'll be waiting for him. My heart yearns for him. Everyone here may think that he's gone. That he's not coming back home now, but deep down, my heart and soul screams for his presence. He's out there somewhere, just like Natalie and Alex are together. I won't run away anymore. I won't leave him anymore. I won't make him suffer anymore. I won't do anything horrible to him anymore. I won't make his heart break anymore. I'll be waiting for him and for everyone else. Especially him... Because I love him. I will see him again, because this is not where it ends. I will carry him with me in my heart and soul 'til I see him again. I love him, no matter what. And nothing can change that."

Kyle wasn't just Natalie's third oldest brother, but he was also my ex-boyfriend/fiancé. Yes, I know it's not right, but a lot has happened between us that led up to that or at least this point. It wasn't totally true love at first sight, but it was something. The day were first met, I was already dating Chris, and to be honest, it wasn't the best day when I first met Kyle. It was rough and hard to get along with him, and in the end, I thought he hated me. However, time flew by, and I was single again. Sadly, the breakup didn't end very well and was worse since it was the day before my birthday.

Trying to get over my breaking heart, I locked myself in my room, listening to sad love songs and romantic songs. Many of my friends tried to take me out and hang out with them, but I refused the offers and stood in my place. The only person I would ever hang out with and talk to was my best friend, Natalie.

I remembered the day I told Natalie that I was listening to Best Friend's Brother by Victoria Justice and it made me think that her brother, Kyle would be the brother that would fall in love with me. At first, I was joking, but that was the day where everything changed... once again...

☆☪☆

"...There's no way that Kyle Taylor would freakin like/love/date a girl like me," I said.

"ABORT MISSION, I REPEAT, ABORT MISSION," my best friend exclaimed.

"SHE KNOWS," Alex slowly said. "SHE KNOWS OHMYGOD!"

"I know, I know what?" I asked.

"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE," Chace cried. "ABORT MISSION! ABORT MISSION!"

"Huh? I'm so lost," I said.

To be honest, I didn't know what was going on, when it was obvious in front of my face. Everyone was running away and the handsome devil himself made his entrance.

"Okay, who told her?!" Kyle yelled.

"I swear to God, I didn't," Natalie confessed.

"Uh, I knew myself?" I admitted. "I listened to a song, and yeah.

"Me neither," Alex admitted.

"Nor I!" Chace added.

"Calm down!" I said. "What's going on?"

"Who told her?!" Kyle growled.

Natalie was scared and curled up into a ball. "He's going to kill someone..."

"Kyle... Don't tell me..." I stood in front of my best friend and then I just realized something. "You..." I covered my mouth. "Are you..."

"Everybody run before he blows!" Alex shouted, covering his head.

"Fine. Run away," Kyle said, glaring at everyone.

Just then, another person made their wonderful appearance.

"What's happening in here?" Will asked.

"SHE KNOWS!" Natalie exclaimed.

"Uh oh," was all William said.

"I don't understand. I know what?" I asked, losing what my thought was previously.

Kyle clenched his fists and breathed deeply. "You know nothing. Ignore them."

"Stop being a baby Kyle, tell her already," Will implied, rolling his eyes.

"Kyle..." I looked at him in the eyes. "Do you... like me?"

"No! She... I... Can't..." Kyle uttered.

"Tell me the truth, please," I said.

"Maybe," he bluntly answered.

"Maybe? It's either yes or no. You can't be unsure with your feelings."

"Yes you can, it happens all the time."

"You might, but..." I sighed. "Never mind. Fine... You kinda like me."

"Kyle is such a baby," Will commented.

"Hey!" Kyle implied.

"Please... Just tell me what's going on," I said.

"She deserves the truth," Will stated. "Tiffy, Kyle has liked you since Natalie first introduced you to him. He never told you because he thought you hated him. He really likes you, and I know you think that he's a horrible person who will break your heart, but he's not. He's a great person inside and he really can care for you. I know that you're not ready for anything involving love right now, and probably for a long time, but all I'm saying is give him the change to get to know him better. He's a great person inside."

Kyle looked away from what his oldest brother said and quietly spoke. "I have to practice the cello." He then started to turn to leave, but...

"I..." I started, reaching out for him. "Wait!"

Kyle turned around and looked at me. "Yes?"

Just then, his sister, who is my best friend bursted with happiness. "THIS IS SO CUTEEEEEEE!I SHIP IT SO MUCH!"

"To tell the truth, I liked you a little when we had our first fight. But since I was with Chris, I had to push that aside. I'm still upset at Chris about our breakup. But..." I smiled softly and took a deep breath. "I'll give you a chance. I believed in you from the beginning that you'll change. I always had. After many things I heard about you from Natalie... I was really happy and proud of you. Because I never gave up on you to change. I believed in you and had hope. To hear you that you like me... It just surprised me and made my heart flutter for a second."

Kyle hugged me softly. "I'm not pushing you into anything... I would just like you to give me the chance to show you the real me. I promise I'll always understand and I'll always put your needs and thoughts before mine. I will never, ever, make you do anything you don't want to."

"This is sooooooooo cute!!!!!" Natalie squealed.

"I'll give you a chance. I'm not pushing myself. I just need someone to pick up the broken pieces. And that," I smiled and hugged Kyle, looking up in his eyes, "might be you."

Kyle smiled and whispered, "I hope it is."

"Okay, now shoo! Go practice the cello!" Natalie said, pushing Kyle out. She ten turned towards me and... "SQUEEEEEE! I SHIP IT SO HARD SIS! I SHIP IT WITH ALL MY HEART! I SHIP IT SO MUCH!"

"I know so," I smiled.

"I'M SO HAPPYYYY!"

"Hehe... Oh sis. It's nothing to be so worked up about."

"THIS IS SO CUTEEEEEEEEEE! OHMYGOSH I'M GOING TO CALL YOU.... Tiffale? Kyany!!! KYANY! KYANY! KYANY SO HARD! KYANY! KYANYYY! KYANYYYYY! KYANNYYYY!"

"Haha sure. Kyany, it is."

"Gimme a K! Gimme a Y! Gimme an A! Gimme a N! Gimme another Y! What does that spell?" Natalie cheered. "KYANY!"

"Natalie! Stop pushing her. There is no Kyany, not yet. We're just friends, until she's ready."

"Hehe. Stop sis... Stop embarrassing me," I laughed.

"Have I made myself clear, Natalie?" Kyle stated.

"Yes, Kyle," Natalie sighed.

"Aww... Don't be upset at your little sis, Kyle," I laughed softly.

"Good." Kyle turned and smiled at me. "Have a good day."

Just when he was about to leave...

"Yeah, Kaki! Don't be mean!" Natalie shouted behind his back.

"Don't call me Kaki, Natalie!" Kyle shouted, coming back in the room.

"Kaki, Kaki, Kaki!!!" Natalie cheered.

"Hehe cute nickname. I love it," I smiled.

Kyle inched forward to his sister. "I can see it now; 'Natalie Taylor, 1998-2015, died of tickling.'"

Natalie screamed and hid behind me. "HE'S GOING TO TICKLE ME TO DEATH! Save me sis!"

I protected her and looked at Kyle. "Come on Kaki. Don't hurt her."

Kyle pouted and hmph, crossing his arms.

Natalie laughed. "In your face KakI!"

"Are you ticklish, Tiffany?" Kyle asked.

I laughed softly and interlaced fingers with his. "Good boy, hehe. Um... No?" I immediately looked away in embarrassment.

"SQUEEEEEEEEE!" Natalie squealed. "KAKI AND TIFFY FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER!"

Kyle softly squeezed my hand. "Oh really?"

"KYANY!" Natalie squealed, jumping up and down.

"I'm ticklish in specific areas since I'm very sensitive," I admitted, blushing slightly and looking down in embarrassment.

"Interesting," was all my secret admirer said.

"Okay Kaki, go away!" Natalie said.

Kyle gently kissed my interlaced hand. "Have a good day, Tiffany."

I smiled softly and replied, "Thank you. Have a wonderful day, Kyle."

"SISSS! THIS IS MY NEW OTP!" Natalie squealed.

"Hehe stop sis. You're embarrassing me too much."

"OHMYGOSH! THIS IS THE SHIP OF THE CENTURY! THIS IS HOW YOUR HEART GETS FIXED AGAIN! I can just see it; Kyle cares for you and becomes your bestest guy friend and helps you feel better about yourself, but you guys are never together. Trust me, Kaki may seem mean and bad and all, but he's actually really sweet inside."

"Hehe, I know sis."

"Okay good."

"And maybe you're right. This might be a nice change and chance."

"Yeah, but remember, don't push yourself. He'll always be there waiting for you, and I know he won't ever pressure you into anything. Take it slow. Become really close friends first."

"I know. Hopefully."

☆☪☆

I thought about that day as I was walking through the city in Harrisburg. I could never forget that day along with the day Chris asked me to be his girlfriend too, but...

This is different.

All my friends told me that Chris still has feelings for me. All of them are trying to persuade me to run back into his arms, but... I couldn't. Yes, I may still have feelings for him, but just like him, it was slowly fading away.

'You'll always have a special place in my heart.'

I'm grateful for his beautiful words that kept reminding me, but knowing Chris, he's slowly moving on. And... I'm trying to too.

Suddenly, I felt something wet on my shoulder and I looked up. Droplets were falling from the heavens down to this earth and I was standing in the middle of it. It grew heavier and heavier and turned out to be a rainstorm, but no one was with me. I was alone this time.

I walked through the city and felt glances from others looking at me through store windows, restaurants, businesses, and schools. I was soaked. Wet. Miserable. Depressed. But mostly heartbroken.

♪Baby, why'd you leave me? Why did you have to go?♪

I started singing one of my favorite songs, Just A Dream and to be honest, I didn't know why. I guess I was trying to keep myself company, but...

Kyle...

Tears fell from my eyes, mixing with the rain, making me more wet and depressing. I hugged myself, wishing there would be someone right there, pulling me in a warm embrace, but it never did. I hugged myself as I continued to walk through the city. My black clothes were now sticking to my skin and my skin was getting wrinkly. As I continued walking, I saw right across the street where I was from, the Harrisburg Symphony Orchestra.

☆☪☆

"Do you know why I decided to start learning instruments?" Kyle asked, smiling while stroking my hair.

I smiled and snuggled in his warm arms. "I would love to."

☆☪☆

I recalled that memory as I crossed the street, not paying attention where I was in.

"Hey!" I heard someone shouted.

"Are you fucking crazy?!" another person cursed.

"Get the fuck out of the road, you bitch!" a man yelled.

All the cars halted to a stop, just inches from me from being hit, but I didn't care. It was an act of suicide, but I felt like I didn't have a reason to live here. However, luck was on my side that time and prevented me from getting hit.

I finally finished crossing the street and looked up.

The Harrisburg Symphony Orchestra...

I remembered the multiple times I came here when I was just a little girl in elementary. I was the only girl that stood awake the whole time during the performance. Ever since those multiple times of classical music, I fell in love with music, all kinds of music, especially classical music.

Every classical music I listen to, there's definitely a story that's there.

I entered in the building and it was empty, like I expected it to be. I went into the auditorium where the performances would usually play and the first thing that caught my eye was the stage.

Right on the stage was a single piano. No other instruments were there, but the classical instrument itself. I walked towards the stage as if it was calling to me.

☆☪☆

"I started learning instruments because of you. I heard you liked singing and often sang and listened to music, so I thought that maybe if I learnt all these songs on different instruments you might be impressed," Kyle stated, laughing softly.

I blushed and buried my face in his chest. "You did that all because of me?"

He wrapped his arms around me and smiled. "Of course."

"That's so sweet of you. If only I could see you perform next month, I would be so happy," I implied, resting my head on his shoulder.

"I would be happy too," he smiled back.

☆☪☆

I softly touched the piano itself, then its keys as I sat in front of Kyle's favorite instrument. I was wet and eventually soaked up the seat I was sitting on, but like before, I was all alone. The whole area was dark, and only light from above shined through from the stained windows above. My fingers went over the piano keys and started to play the last music piece I heard from my loved musician, Kyle, himself.

It was a song I think he composed to go with a proposal he wrote for me due to a dare.

Hehe, he went a bit too far on that dare.

The dare only requested all the guys to write a proposal to their girlfriends or future wife, and during that time, I was Kyle's girlfriend. The dare was requested by Alex, as he was with his girlfriend Natalie and was told to Wes, who was the boyfriend of Jessica ('so-called friend'/betrayer). I started off with the first ten notes and already I started to cry. My sobs rang out through the place, echoing back my sorrows and regret.

When playing the song, I felt a connection, a connection that he felt more deeply than I did and now when I felt it, I regretted everything I did that had ended our relationship.

I'm so sorry... Sorry... Sorry...

He put a lot of thought and love in the music that it described who I was to him. Like every classical music, there's a story that's there and there was. A story about us being together, forever.

I grabbed a fistful of my hair from the depressing stress and collapsed at my seat. I banged my head on the hard wooden floor and felt something wet underneath, but I didn't care. I just laid there, looking up at the sunlight shone through above, crying with sorrow.

♪I was counting on forever, now I'll never know. I... can't even... breathe ♪

I closed my eyes with tears stinging on my face as I remembered a memory of Kyany.

☆☪☆

I smiled and interlaced my fingers with his. "I'm just surprised that you like me out of all girls. I thought you hate me."

"I thought you hated me! You always said I was a horrible person who slept around too much," he laughed, squeezing my hand.

"Well...! You did ask me if you should use a strawberry condom or a cinnamon condom, when I was at school," I laughed.

Kyle blushed. This is going to sound stupid, but I was trying to get your attention."

"Hehe sure you were."

☾♡☽

"You're mad at me," he muffled, burying his face in my neck.

"Oh Kaki..." I smiled, running my fingers through his hair. "I'm not. Trust me. It's okay."
He pouted. "Now you'll be calling me Kaki for the rest of my life."

"Hehe what can I say? It's cute and adorable! Also... It tickles a little." I tried to push Kyle's big head away from my neck. "Get your head out of my neck, silly."

"But you smell nice," he laughed as he slowly pulled away.

I blushed. "Do not!"

"What? Why? You do. Like vanilla."

☾♡☽

"Yeah, I heard your collarbone is super sensitive," he implied.

I blushed. "A-And how do you know?"

He laughed and wrapped his arms around me. "Because I just do."

"Meanie," I said, playfully slapping him on the chest.

Kyle gasped. "You're the mean one!"

☾♡☽

"Hehe..." I laughed and rested my forehead on his. "Well I think it's adorable."

"I think you're adorable," Kyle smiled.

"You and your words..." I blushed.

Kyle, then kissed my forehead and I smiled happily and looked in his eyes.

"I'm so lucky to have someone like you in my life," he softly said, stroking my hair.

☆☪☆

I opened my eyes and sat up. I rested my hand on my heart and felt it banging in pain.

"I'm so lucky to have someone like you in my life."

I recalled that moment and I felt another tear leaving my eyes.

I betrayed him...

I felt so lucky too. So lucky. He sacrificed so much for me and yet, 'I' turned him away. Why quotation marks around "I"? Well, Jessica pretended to be me when I was busy and pushed Kyle away for "me" to be with Chris. Ever since, Kyle was more distanced from me and I never knew why till I found out the truth.

Jessica wanted Chris. She likes Chris. Ever since seeing a picture of him, she's been wanting her claws to dig into him and shut the living daylight out of her. I shook my head with apologizes and regret as I stood up and looking up at the ceiling from the stage.

There was zodiac star signs above and constellations painted on the ceilings and I spotted mine from the distance. I was a Leo and Kyle was a Libra, so I looked over and I saw his sign too, however, I saw a sign in between us. A Virgo, which sadly was Jessica who torn us apart for the guy she'll never get a chance with. It was a coincidence how it was all laid out in front of me.

She did ruined my chance with Kyle just for her to be with Chris and the fact that she wanted no guy to be with me. She broke me and Kyle up... And I will never, ever forgive her.

Shaking my head, I took a step down and out of the stage into the open.

I left the building and called my friend, Kristen to pick me up and drive me back home. So, she did and when she saw me, she was on the verge of tears.

"Tiffany..." she slowly said.

But that was all she said as I went inside the car and sat there, not saying anything. As she drove me back home, the ride of dead silent. None of us said a word or made a sound and when she dropped me at my home, she tucked a wet strand of hair behind my ear and looked at me.

I did nothing and when she was done, I opened the door and entered in my place, not caring about all the shouting  from my family, especially my parents are giving me. I just went straight into my room, as tiredness took over me since I didn't sleep for so long ever since the day of the Paris attacks. I tired to force myself to stay awake, since I'm afraid to get some nightmares, but I was in a coma-like state and was out of the light.

☆☪☆

"Where is he?" I tried to find Kyle. "Kaki! Where are you?!"

"Woah, woah! Tiffy, what's wrong? Are you alright?" Kyle said, holding my arm. "It's okay. I'm here. I'm here for you."

"KAKI'S GONNA DIEEEEEE!" Natalie shouted, clearly on high.

"Oh my god! Kaki!" I looked at him with tears and hugged him tight. "You're here! You're alright!" I cupped his face. "I was so worried!"

He hugged me back. "Um... What's wrong?"

"Sis said that you were going to die. The doctors, you... I know that she's lying, but I can't get over the fact of you leaving me and dying," I answered, looking into his deep brown eyes.

"Waaaaaahhhhhtttttttttttt? I'm not lying!" Natalie lied.

"Oh, Tiffy... Of course I'm not going to die." Kyle smiled and cupped my cheek. "I'll never leave you."

I smiled and hugged him tight. "Thank goodness! If you ever leave me, I'll..." I shook my head. "I just don't want you to let me go."

"Hey... I'm not leaving you. I'll always be right here," he hugged me tightly back.

☆☪☆

I sat up, breathing heavily. I touched my face and felt wetness on my cheeks. I was crying in my sleep. I just remembered a promise Kyle made to me, where he'll never leave me, but...

I went to the edge of my bed and my feet touched the soft carpet underneath me. I walked over to my window and looked out. It was still dark over here, but over in Paris, it was bright daylight. I looked up at the moon in front of me in the sky, which was the sun in Paris, and thought about what Kyle said.

"I'll never leave you.... I'll always be right here."

I started to cry.

♪Oh... Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go? I was counting on forever, now I'll never know. Oh, I'll never know.♪

I rested my hand over my heart as I thought of Kyle. Looking at the window, I saw an image of Kyle, resting his hand on the glass as I responded by placing my hand with his. A perfect match...

♪It's like I'm looking from a distance. Standing in the background. Everybody's saying, "He's not coming home now." This can't be happening to me. This is just a dream.♪

The image slowly disappeared at that last song lyric and I drew back my hand.

My family and friends kept telling me that Kyle's not coming back. That he's dead, along with Natalie and Alex. But I knew that somewhere, out there, they're alive and he's waiting there... For me...

☆☪☆

Kyle pulled me into his bed and buried his face in my neck. "I love you," he murmured.

I gasped. "You... Love me?" I gently stroked his hair. "Is that true?"

"Yes. And I don't care if you don't love me back, because I'll always, always love you. No matter what. And just remember, I'm not pushing you into anything. You're still free. But I love you." He sleepily buried his face in my hair. "You smell nice, by the way."

I smiled and kissed his temple. "I love you too Kaki. And thank you."

Kyle smiled and wrapped his arms around me.

"I can't believe you actually love me. Hehe I can't believe I fell in love with my best friend's brother." I wrapped my arms around his neck.

He tangled his legs with mines and fell asleep in my arms.

I smiled and whispered, "Good night Kaki. Sweet dreams." I kissed his forehead. "I love you."

Natalie squealed happily. "THE KYANY SHIP HAS OFFICIALLY SAILED!"

I blushed and looked at my now boyfriend's sleeping face. "Yeah, it just did," I smiled happily, thinking about what the future would be holding for us.

☾♡☽

"Hehe," I laughed, stroking Kyle's hair. "I heard that you're taking cooking classes."

"Yeah," he replied.

"How is it? Sis told me that you did it for me or something."

"It's good. I did."

I blushed and buried my face in his chest. "Again? Oh Kaki... That's wonderful.

Kyle smiled and stroked my hair.

"You're so sweet." I looked into his eyes. "Everything you do is based on me. You're doing so much..." I started to tear up with joy.

Then, Kyle kissed my nose. "So what would you like your future husband to be? A doctor? A lawyer? An engineer?"

'Dear future husband...'

I laughed softly at my thought of Meghan Trainer's song and stroked his hair again. "Hehe, anything you want... sweetie."

He buried his head in my neck and said, "No... Tell me."

I moved around a bit since he was nuzzling his head in one of my sensitive areas. "Kaki... It tickles. But I want you to fulfill your dream career."

"I'll keep tickling you if you don't tell me."

"No." I squirmed in his arms. "Please don't."

"Tell me then."

"I don't know. A doctor is great since we might work together and my parents would be happy. A lawyer is great too since my grandparents would be happy and my grandpa is one."

"So who do you want to please most? Your parents or grandparents?"

"That's the hard part..." I implied. "I guess my parents, but don't you want to be a professional musician? You don't have to be a doctor or lawyer. I want you to fulfill and achieve your dream."

"Well, I'd love to be a professional musician, but I'd rather be something that pleases you. So I'll be a doctor," he stated.

I leaned my forehead against Kyle's. "Kaki... I want you to do something you love."

"Well I want to do something you would like."

"But I want you to do something you love. Your dreams are more important than me. Put yourself first."

"You're the most important thing in my life."

I smiled. "So are you, but please... Fulfill your dream. I'll be very happy. I want to see you smile with the career you love, not that one I want you to do."

He nuzzled my neck. "Too late. I'm becoming a doctor, whether you like it or not."

"Just promise me you'll continued to play music." I squirmed in his arms. "Stop Kaki! It tickles!"

"I promise I'll continue to play music," he laughed and stopped nuzzling his head in my neck.

"Thank you." I laughed softly and kissed him softly. "You're such a tease."

Kyle kissed me back softly. "You're welcome."

I smiled and blushed. "My first kiss from you..."

"With many more to come," Kyle added, kissing my nose.

"I can't wait," I smiled.

Kyle and I laughed together.

"It's so late over there," Kyle implied, kissing my forehead.

"Don't worry about it," I said, kissing his cheek. "Even if I did sleep, I'll be dreaming about us, but you're here with me." Then it just hit me and I immediately blushed. "Did I just said that to you... Oh gosh." I covered my face.

Kyle chuckled. "That's so cute. But you still need to sleep. Human bodies can't function without sleep."

"But I did... This morning. I slept in for a long time," I pouted.

"That's not the point. You need more sleep."

"Hmph... Stupid time zone. This is so unfair. But I want to be with you." I interlaced fingers with his. "Please Kaki..."

He squeezed my hand softly. "Let's sleep together then. I'm tired too."

I snuggled in his arms, still holding his big, warm hand. "Okay... But now I feel bad since I woke you up when you were tired. You could've told me before. I would've let you sleep."

Kyle kissed my forehead and wrapped his arms around me. "I probably would've stayed awake anyway."

I tangled my legs with his and wrapped my arms around him. "Hehe well now you're tired mister," I smiled.

"Now I am," he smiled back, resting his chin on my forehead. "Goodnight Tiffany. Sweet dreams." Kyle kissed my head and whispered, "I love you."

I smiled and kissed him back. "Sweet dream Kaki." I snuggled into his unbearable, warm embrace. "I love you too."

☾♡☽

"Please, it's so obvious Kyle's just acting. He's trying to take advantage of Tiffany," Chace stated.

"What? Of course not!" Kyle implied.

"What?!" I said.

"Hi Tiffany," Chace greeted.

"You bloody dic-" Kyle started to say.

"Tsk, tsk, don't wanna swear in front of your girlfriend, do you? Or is she actually your girlfriend?" Chace interrupted.

"Chace! Stop it!" Kyle exclaimed.

"Hey bro... Why?" I started. "I'm his girlfriend, right?" I was his girlfriend, but I want to hear what the second heir of the Taylor business has to say.

"Did he ever ask you if you wanted to be his girlfriend?" Chace asked.

"Woah! What's going on here?" Alex entered, asking.

"Chace is being a dick!" Kyle yelled.

"Woah, woah... Nobody is being a dick," Alex implied.

I looked at Kyle then back to Chace. "It was more like I blurted out my feelings, Tay told Kyle, Kyle told me his feelings, and we kissed. But I never heard him mention girlfriend." I was telling the truth. I never heard Kyle implying to me as his girlfriend yet, even though he said "I love you" and "sweetheart". "I didn't think he has to since he told me that he loves me and everything." And to tell the truth, it was just like how Chris and I confessed our feelings. It wasn't until the week or two after that he implied me as his girlfriend, however...

"So it's not official," Chace stated.

It is official! Just in a different way! But I started to tear up since I knew that he would not ever accept my relationship with his brother he calls a dick and a player.

"See, my man agrees," Alex implied.

"Judge for yourself. Chace is a dick," Kyle corrected.

"So it's not?" I cried.

"Ask your 'boyfriend'," Chace said.

"Why are you being so mean all of the sudden, Chace?" Alex asked.

I was so furious that I turned on my heel and ran away, crying.

"Tiffany!" Kyle shouted right after me.

"Now you've done it, Chace!" Alex exclaimed. "Natalie is gonna kill you."

"I just want to tell her the truth. You don't know Kyle like I do," Chace commented.

"You've done it, Chace. You officially ruined Kyany before it even started," Alex said, being upset.

"Well, Tiffany would've been through much more heartbreak if I hadn't said anything now," Chace implied.

"I feel like I'm going to be charged for Chace's murder within the next few hours," Kyle glared at his brother, saying this.

"Slow down, bro, no one's dying tonight," Alex said.

"He's such a fucking dickhead." Kyle glared daggers at his brother.

"Aw, my poor baby. Can't handle it?" Chace smirked.

"You little...!" Kyle started to snap.

"Woah! Calm down!" Alex yelled.

"STOP!" I cried. "You guys need to fucking stop fighting and murdering each other!"

"Whoop, there it is," Alex added.

"Chace, I thought you were happy for me. And yet, you told me out of the blue that Kaki wants to take an advantage of me?!" I sobbed. "You were ABORTING THE MISSION when I found out he freakin has a crush on me!"

"Well you never know!" Chace implied.

"Here's something that you need to know..." I cried, and pointed at his chest. "I love him and I don't care a shit about what's going on, because I know Kaki! You freakin have this hatred towards him! And I-I-I hate it! Kyle was never cared and loved as he wanted to be... And I could see why."

"You don't know why! You told Stephanie to leave your relationship with Jonah alone, well I'm telling you to leave mine alone too! Your family is weird and abusive that way, and everyone else chose to leave it alone and trust you! Well trust me, you won't understand so stop trying!" Chace snapped.

I was furious in tears on how he was talking about my... MY family! MINE! I couldn't believe him... He was the nicest one out of them all, but I think I regret what I told myself before. He insulted my family and I will never, EVER forgive him!

"You know what?!" I snapped and raised my hands in surrender. Tears were streaming down with anger and depression. "Fine! Be happy to hear this!" I grabbed my bedroom door handle and slammed the door in front of his face. "I'm single!"

I turned my back against the door and slid down till I hit the floor. I buried my face in my arms, bring my knees close to my body.

"CHACE, YOU MOTHERFUCKING LITTLE PIECE OF SHI-" I heard Kyle snapped.

"Calm down!" Alex exclaimed, trying to hold Kyle back, but failed.

Kyle grabbed his brother's collar. "Are you happy?! You've ruined two people's lives and you've ended love for us! You're a low piece of bloody shit and I will never, ever call you a brother again. You are nothing to me. Once Natalie gets wind of this, you'll be nothing to her as well." He pushed Chace to the ground. "And to think I once looked up to you," he sneered. "People think you're the nice one of the Taylor Brothers, but you've got some dirty secrets and once they're out, you'll be an outcast." Kyle then started to leave the room. "Go die in hell."

☾♡☽

"I never seen Kyle cried before. He's in the other room, crying his heart out. I think he thinks he lost you," Alex said, pointed towards the door, trying to comfort his girlfriend.

I slowly shook my head and slowly entered into his bedroom. "Kyle?"

"Here," he replied.

"Kyle!" I ran into the room and hugged him. "Oh my god..." I looked at him. "Are you okay?"

Kyle sighed. "Not really... But you're more important. Are you okay?"

I looked into his eyes. "I'm fine. I'm more worried about you."

He softly stroked my hair. "Don't lie... How's your hand?"

I hurt myself by breaking a vase in my room after the fight I had with Chace on my relationship and purposely cut my hand.

I cupped his cheek with my bandaged hand. "It's fine. I'm okay, trust me."

He looked down. "I... I'm sorry."

I smiled softly. "Look at me..."

Kyle teared up and shook his head. "It's all my fault. I'm sorry..." He started to cry. "I'm sorry I ruined everything for you..."

I wiped his tears gently and kissed his eyelids softly. "Kaki... I forgive you. Don't be sorry... You didn't ruin anything for me."

"I'm so sorry... I was trying to help. I was trying to love you. I love you so much, I'm sorry..." he cried.

I hugged him tight. "Shh... Don't be sorry. I know you were. I love you much more... To the heavens and back, universe and back, infinity and beyond."

Kyle shook his head and cried on my shoulder. "I... I'm sorry."

I wiped his tears. "Kaki... Don't think I'm gone for good." I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I'm still yours. And always will be."

"Really?" he sniffed, looking into my eyes.

I smiled and interlaces our hands together. "Really. I really do love you Kaoru Colin Paul Taylor."

"Don't call me Kaoru," he softy chuckled with tears in his eyes. "I love you." Kyle squeezed my hand softly.

I squeezed back and kissed Kyle. "I love you, and I always will."

"I love you too," he kissed back.

"I love you much more," I whispered between our kisses.

"I love you most," he smiled against my lips.

☾♡☽

Kyle held me back. "Stay here. You belong here. With me. With us."

☾♡☽

Kyle kissed me softly. "I need you. I love you."

☾♡☽

"Don't worry. I'll go shopping once this Chace drama is over," Kyle smiled at me, referring to buying a promise ring.

☾♡☽

"Hmm..." Kyle scribbled some words down on paper. "Should I say the sea is my love for her or the stars in the sky at night are? Damn writing a proposal is hard... White roses for purity... As pure and beautiful as her soul."

☾♡☽

Kyle pulled me into his arms protectingly. "Mine."

☾♡☽

"Tiffany? Are you okay?" Kyle asked, entering in my room.

"Just leave me alone," I replied, covering my face with a pillow.

I felt the bed going down on my side. "Nope."

I turned my back on him in my bed, trying to pretend to be asleep.

Just then, I felt a presence laying right next to me and a pair of arms wrapping around me.

"You smell nice," Kyle commented.

I tensed up a bit from his touch. I was upset after my secret was exposed and I wish it never happened. "T-Thanks."

"Oh... Right," he said. "Um... Don't take that the wrong way..." Then, Kyle started to play with my hair. "So..."

"It's okay. I didn't," I answered, turning to face him. "Aren't you mad at me?" I looked down. "Maybe hate me."

"Of course not," Kyle denied. "Everyone goes through this. It's a part of life."

"I know, but... I don't want this to happen to me. I don't want to be like those girls you did with the one night stands." I shook my head. "When I realized I was going through it, I was afraid you would break up with me."

Kyle buried his face in my neck. "I would never ever treat you like a one night stand. You're a rare gem and should never ever be treated like that. I love you and I'll never let you go.

☆☪☆

So many beautiful memories... And yet they all had to be thrown into the burning flames since it was all 'my' fault. I fell to the floor in my room that night, crying till morning and passed out, not responding to the voices that were calling to me.

A week after that, all my closest friends pointed out that I was losing weight and was skinny. I didn't care. I wasn't myself anymore after that day that I started to give up on eating, sleeping, and others.

Later, I was talking to Chris about my feelings for him, even thought they were also slowly fading away like his was before. He was right... Even if I still had feelings for him, nothing will change. I finally knew that he found someone new and someone better.

After our chat, I wanted to cool my head and go out for a drive. I finally got my permit, but I need someone to be with me and watch me since I don't have my license yet. Not wanting to call any of my friends, I called my close cousin, Mila.

She agreed and drove to my place in her brand new car she got for her birthday last year as an earlier birthday present for her permit. She arrived and switched places with me, with me in the driver's seat and her in the passenger seat.

I didn't want to say anything and Mila knew me well and didn't try to get anything out of me. Just then, as I stopped in front of a stoplight, I heard Just A Dream from another car's radio. I started to sing along with it and Mila jumped a bit from her seat just by the sound of my voice. It wasn't a surprise since the ride was totally silent and I suddenly interrupted it just by singing.

♪And she held on to all she had left of him.♪

☆☪☆

"No..." I tried to stand up and hugged him from behind. "I do care... But do you?" Then I passed out from exhaustion and medication due to my condition in the hospital.

I felt Kyle catching me and calling out to me. "Tiffy?"

I felt my body being lifted and felt something soft right underneath me. Then I felt something warm over me and something soft and wet laid on my forehead.

"Of course I care... I've always cared about you," I heard him say.

I heard footsteps and I knew that he was leaving. I slowly opened my eyes and saw a blurry figure with tears.

Kyle turned around with a soft smile, only he would show to me. "I want you to know, before I go... You really did mean something to me. You always will. So I'm saying goodbye... Forever."

☆☪☆

I gripped the steering wheel tightly remembering that memory.

♪Oh, and what could have been. And then the guns rang one last shot. And it felt like a bullet in her heart.♪

☆☪☆

"At the mistress' command," the Alpha Squad stated.

"Kyle's in hostage... You know what to do," I commanded. "I'll go in from behind."

The Alpha crepes in the room and I followed right after them.

'This is all my fault. I should've stayed behind and be with Kyle instead.'

A man with a smirk turned around. "Well, well, well, look at what we have here."

I stood up and faced him. "I'm presuming you were hired by my ex boyfriend." He was the gunman that threatened Natalie about her brother.

"Of course I was darling," he smirked.

"You're outnumbered," the Alpha stated.

The gunman pressed the gun into Kyle's head. "One bullet, my dears... One bullet and you lose everything."

"Stop! The message from my ex... He wants to light my heart in flames. Shoot me instead!" I demanded.

"Nice try, sweetheart, but I'm not killing you. This guy is going down," the gunman implied.

Kyle sighed. "Why are you waiting? Shoot already."

"Don't order me, smartass." The gunman tightened his finger on the gun.

"Shoot and you'll die!" The Alpha warned.

"Your boss told me in the cell that he rather have me dead than him. I talked with him," I implied.

"I've heard that before. Of course you did," the gunman scoffed.

"Then shoot me," I said.

"Shoot! Coward! Kill me already!" Kyle yelled.

"Shoot me!" I shouted.

"As you wish." The gunman tightened his finger on the trigger. "Say bye bye, Taylor."

"No!" I tried to push Kyle out of the way and tried to take the bullet, but...

The gunman simply aimed the gun at Kyle. "Darling, you have a nice play on words. I haven't' shot you yet."

I started to surrender. "I just want to be killed by you. Kill me instead."

'I didn't want Kyle to die. It was all my fault... Everything was all me... I'm so sorry.'

"White roses for purity. The sea is my endless love. I promise to love you forever. You are always in my heart..." Kyle looked at me, then closed his eyes with a tear rolling down his cheek. "Will you marry me?"

Just then, a shot rang out and the gunman had fulfill his deal.

"NO!" Natalie cried.

My heart stopped as I saw the man I love on the floor with blood on his head. "NO!" I ran to Kyle.

While the Alpha Squad was calling the ambulance, I held my beloved in my arms and cried. "Kyle... Please stay with me."

Kyle struggled to breathe. "Will you? Will you marry me?"

"I do!" I smiled with tears and kissed him softly. "Please... You'll be okay."

He smiled weakly, taking one last breath. "I love you." He closed his eyes and laid there in my arms.

☆☪☆

I hadn't realized it then, but I was crying uncontrollably after that.

I love you too...

♪Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go? I was counting on forever, now I'll never know. I can't even breathe. It's like I'm looking from a distance. Standing in the background. Everybody's saying, "He's not coming home now." This can't be happening to me. This is just a dream.♪

I had a very tight hold on the steering wheel as my knuckles turned white and concentrated on driving, trying to fight back the tears, but as I was driving, the last thing I saw was a black car speeding towards me.

Light.

Screams.

Crash.

Blood.

Figure.

Sirens.

Voices...

My eyes slowly opened, weak from whatever and all I could see was light and hear voices.

"Tiffany!"

"Tiffany!"

"Tiffany!"

"Take her to emergency NOW!"

"We need you to stay behind!"

"Tiffany..."

"Ky-" I barely whispered.

My eyes grew tired as consciousness was taking over me as the last thought was him...

ღ☁ღ

I was in Kyle's car with him. The hood was gone, and we were looking at the beautiful midnight, starry night together. We snuggle next to each other, sharing each others' warmth. I rest my hand on his chest, my head on his broad shoulder and he put an arm around my shoulders, resting his head with mine.

Kyle called me to see him and I responded yes and here we are now. A beautiful, calm night, looking at stars above, and below. Snuggling in each others' arms, what could've been better than a simple, casual, yet romantic date like this?

"So I'm thinking about tomorrow," Kyle said.

I turned to face Kyle.

"It's against the rules."

"What rules?" I smiled.

"Well I decided that tonight we'll just be together and think about stuff." He put his arms around me shoulders. "Just you and me, that's all that matters."

☆

♪It was two weeks after the day she turned eighteen. All dressed in white. Going to the church that night.♪

I was dressed in white. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw myself in a beautiful wedding dress. The one that Natalie help me choose out. It was beautiful with an air of sweet delight, misty tulle full A-line gown. This Sophia Tolli wedding dress was called Ida and it delivers romance with pewter lace accents and crystal hand-beading. Delicately scalloped lace decorated the strapless sweetheart bodice while a draped sash with a side of crystal brooch emphasizes the waist. A chapel length train and a back corset finishes off this regal gown. I spun in this dress and was ready to go to church tonight.

Today is the day!

It was the day where Kyle and I will get married!

♪She had his box of letters in the passenger seat. Sixpence in a shoe, something borrowed, something blue. And when the church doors opened up wide. She put her veil down. Trying to hide the tears.♪

I was driving in my car and I had a box of his letters in my passenger seat. The letters he wrote to me from our long-distance relationship.

I arrive at the church and when the church doors opens up wide, I put my veil down, trying to hide the tears.

♪Oh she couldn't believe it. She heard the trumpets from the military band. And the flowers fell out of her hand.♪

I imagine what should've happen right in front of me. All our families and friends together clapping and up in front of the alter was a priest and my beloved fiancé, Kyle, in suit and all, giving me his signature smile from afar. But I just couldn't believe it. I hear the trumpets from the military band, Alpha, Beta, and Third... And the flowers fell out of my hands.

♪Baby, why'd you leave me. Why'd you have to go? I was counting on forever, now I'll never know. I can't even breathe. It's like I'm looking from a distance. Standing in the background. Everybody's saying, "He's not coming home now." This can't be happening to me. This is just a dream.♪

☆

"I guess I'm just nervous about tomorrow," I admitted.

"Tomorrow is just another day," Kyle stated.

☆

♪The preacher man said, "Let us bow our heads and pray. Lord please lift his soul, and heal this hurt." Then the congregation all stood up and sang the saddest song she heard. Then they handed her a folded up flag. And she held on to all she had left of him. Oh, and what could have been. And then the guns ran one last. And it felt like a bullet in her heart.♪

I imagine I was standing at the alter with Kyle. In each others' arms, looking into each others' eyes. He pulls my veil back and strokes my cheek and we kissed to seal our beautiful vows. We pull away and smile at each other, happy for what the future would hold for us now.

I remembered the day after our starry night date, it was time for Kyle to go back home to his family for business. He put his suitcase in his car and turned to look at me. He was so handsome in a business suit. So formal and business-like. I looked back at him and step forward and hugged him tight with him embracing me back tight. I teared up in his shoulders as he rubbed my back soothingly. We always do this since he's always busy with the family business with his brothers and sister. Then, he pulled away from me and went back to his car and entered in the driver's seat. I turned to look at him leave and there he was again... Leaving me alone back at our home for business again.

Continuing to walk up to the alter, I see Kyle running up to me in his suit, but he was slowly fading with every step. I close my eyes and let out a sob for my beloved.

♪Baby, why'd you leave me. Why'd you have to go? I was counting on forever, now I'll never know. I can't even breathe. It's like I'm looking from a distance. Standing in the background. Everybody's saying, "He's not coming home now." This can't be happening to me. This is just a dream.♪

Tears ran down my face, trying to not believe what was happening. My white wedding dress was turned into a long sleeve, lace black funeral dress. My pure white long veil was now a black laced veil covering my face. My flowers in my hand turned into black ashes as black rose petals were flying through and scatters in the grave.

The priest said, "Let us bow our heads and pray. Lord please lift his soul, and heal this hurt." Then the congregation all stand up and sings the saddest song I ever heard. A song I wish I would never hear my entire life. All our families and friends were sitting down, bowing their heads as I entered through the doors, slowly walking up and stumbling to the alter. My tears smudge my makeup as my mascara was running down my face.

♪Oh, Baby, why'd you leave me. Why'd you have to go? I was counting on forever, now I'll never know. Oh, I'll never know.♪

☆

Earlier, before going to the wedding, Max, from the Alpha Squad came to my house and handed me an envelope. I took the envelope and opened it.

"Dear Mrs. Taylor,
The Taylor Family and the Department of the French Army (Alpha, Beta, and Third) deeply regrets to inform you that your husband, Kaoru Colin Paul Taylor was killed in active in the performance of the terrorist attacks in Paris.
The family and the department extends you to its sincerest sympathy in your great loss.
Sincerely..."

I put a hand on my forehead and cried my heart out, leaning against the doorframe.

☆

♪It's like I'm looking from a distance. Standing in the background. Everybody's saying, "He's not coming home now." This can't be happening to me. This is just a dream.♪

Then the guns boom out one last shot and it felt like a bullet in my heart. Everyone around me was frozen as I slowly walk up to the casket in front of me. I cry, covering my mouth as I arrIve in front of my beloved's coffin. I rest both of my hands on top of the casket and curl my hands together. I cry in my arms on top of the casket and slowly lift myself up, sobbing as I cover my face with sorrow.

"Kyle!" I cried.

♪Oh, This is just a dream♪

I dream that it was beautiful and bright. The sun was shining from the stained windows into the church as Kyle and I sealed our vows with a kiss.

☆

"A whole new life planned for us... It's perfect," Kyle said, looking into my eyes.

I looked into his eyes, "Promise?"

Kyle smiled softly, but just looked away and didn't say anything back.

☆

♪Just a dream♪

ღ☁ღ

My eyes bolted up as I was blinded by bright lights.

Where am I? Was that just a dream?

I felt a mask on my face and realized it was an oxygen mask. I slowly turned my head and saw machines and people in uniforms outside the room window. I was in the hospital...

What happened?

Just then, a nurse came in with a clipboard in her hand, but just as she was about to examine me, she screamed and ran out of the room to get some doctors. I didn't know what was happening, but all I know is that darkness took over me again.

☆☪☆

"Who's this? Your friend?" Kyle asked, when hugging his sister.

"Yep. This is Tiffany..." Natalie muttered. "Your fiancé."

Kyle smiled. "Nice to meet you, Tiffany. I'm Kyle."

I smiled back. "It's very nice to meet you too, Kyle."

Kyle offered his hand and I glanced at Natalie who smirked to herself. I took his hand and shake it. It was an odd feeling, but it's best to start out slow.

"This sounds so stupid, but you look just so familiar. Silly right?" Kyle chuckled.

I laughed softly. "Yeah. I get that a lot." Not...

"Really?" Kyle shrugged. "That's weird." He stared at me. "Why do I think of white roses whenever I look at you? Gosh, this is weird." He smiled as he picked up Sapphire, the family cat.

☾♡☽

"...I, um... I found a letter hidden behind my bookcase starting like this;

'Dear Tiffany,
Before I met you, I was in such a dark place. My decisions were based on the high I wanted to at that point. I didn't care about my future or how it would affect me and everyone around me. And then you came, as my sister said, hurtling through my gravity like an uncontrolled meteor flying through space. You crashed into my world and even now, I still can't figure whether it's a good thing or a bad thing.'

There's more... The letter goes on to say about how much I 'care and love you,' but 'for the better of both of us' 'I must leave you be.' On the back, written in cursive;

'White roses represent your purity. The sea is my endless love. You aren't just the stars to me, you're the whole damn sky. Will you marry me?"

☆☪☆

The day I woke up, my friends, Kristen and Brittany told me all that has happened. Luckily for me, I didn't have amnesia. Apparently, I was in a car accident. I asked where my family was and she told me they were at Maryland for the Vietnamese Eucharistic Youth Movement Ceremony, so the twins stood in their place and took care of me.

While taking care of me, they told me about Chris. Just Chris... About how he said 'I love you' and that he told one of the doctors that he was my boyfriend. No matter how I see it, I knew it wasn't right. But I pushed that aside and looked at the two girls faces in front of me, smiling as they talked about my future with Chris.

What they don't know is that there won't be one... And what Chris doesn't know is that when Caleb, a friend of ours said "She passed the test. Keep her Chris," that was from his twin brother, Rider. He wanted Chris and I to be back together too. Thinking I'll make him happy and change his ways again, but... It's too late... There won't be an us between him and I anymore.

There won't ever be one again...

The second day, my least favorite person came to visit me... Jessica.

I guess she came to celebrate Thanksgiving with her relatives and family.

She moved a month or two ago to California for college and now she's back, still having the will to get Chris to have whatever with her.

"Oh Tiffy. It's so nice to see you," Jessica smiled, clearly faking.

"Hey," I simply said.

"Don't be like that in front of your friend."

"Sure..."

She took off her sunglasses and looked at me. "I just want you to know that Chris is my boyfriend, so you better not try to do anything funny." She glared at me.

I guess she thinks I have amnesia. Well, okay then...

"Why?"

"You don't want to be a whore and a slut like your best friend, right?"

I clenched my fist under the bed sheets.

What did you just said about Natalie?!

"No..."

"Then I recommend you stay away from my Chrissypoo and move on. Oh wait... You can't cuz you don't deserve anyone," she crackled. "It's sad that someone would purposely want to kill you like that. Luckily it wasn't me." She then left my room, alone.

Chris will never, ever... Be with you. He deserves someone much better than you! You ruined my life! I did deserve someone, but now...

I slammed my fist hand down on the table right next to me and I could've swore I broke my hand, but I didn't care...

She's going to pay for what she did.

The third day, my broken hand was now bandaged and Chris was forced to talk with me and I talked with him. I lied to him at first by pretending to have amnesia, but when he asked me about a girl and for my advice, I revealed myself and learned that this special girl was one of Natalie's closest friends, Brittany.

In truth, I was really happy for him. I really was. He finally found someone new. Someone special. And... someone better than me. She was perfect, smart, and very beautiful. Same age. Same school. Same city. Same love. I knew that Brittany liked him too when I talked with her and I was so happy for her and Chris. I wished them 'good luck' on their first dinner date at Chris' house and just before I left them alone, Brittany told me that Kyle's eyes lights up when he talks about me. I was really happy to hear that as well and the fact that she also said that Kyle likes me.

My heart fluttered a bit from that, but realization hit me about what he said before. I started to tell Brittany what I thought of and she told me to have faith and 'only time will tell'.

I trusted her and I believed and have faith that Kyle is out there somewhere, along with Natalie and Alex, still alive and waiting to come home.

The fourth day, my family came home from Maryland and came to visit me. At first, I was grateful they took their time off to see me, but I was wrong.

"I wish I can beat you up," Jonah said, glaring at me.

"You're a disappointment to the family," Monica stated.

"Retard!" Dominic commented. "She's dating a robber! (robber meaning Chris)"

I tried to ignore the harsh, lying and hurtful words I kept hearing throughout my life again and looked at my parents.

My mother walked up to me and smacked me in the head.

"You're so stupid!" she yelled. "You go to school and you turn out like this. And I born and raised you! This is what I receive?!"

I started to cry. The pain in my head from the impact of the smack and the hurtful words my mother spoke.

My dad just looked at me. His face was emotionless and I knew that he was disappointed in me.

"Cha (priest/father) was right! You only care about your friends! Not your family! That was the only part that was true!" my mom continued. "Smart? Smart you little idiot. I trusted in you and yet this," she pointed at me, "this is what I get. You disappoint me."

My siblings all smirked at me while I sat there, crying from the words.

"Why are you crying?!" my dad yelled. "They[words] don't hurt you. They're[words] not hitting or killing you! That's pathetic!"

Words do hurt! You just don't understand!

"Why can't I be respected?!" I cried.

My mom slapped me in the cheek. "Cuz you never do anything to benefit the family you lazy girl! You listen to the people outside, not here in the family! You're stupid right there!"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Monica said.

"You're so lucky you're not getting whipped," Jonah implied. "And that we're not blackmailing you."

Why blackmail? My family thinks Natalie and the rest of my family in Paris are fakers and liars just wanting my money. My siblings call them criminals or robbers. My parents call them fake and 'non real', just like my friends that betrayed and lied to me said to me... All the time.

"Retard!" Dominic commented. "I hate you! We don't like you no more!"

I covered my now red cheek and continued to cry. Their words were so painful that it kills me inside.

"Let's go home," my dad simply said. "We're done here."

My whole family, one by one exited the door, my mother being the last one.

"When you get home, you're going to read that Loi Nguyen (Vietnamese intercessions: church) for me and if you fail, I'll hit you deadly (in other words, painfully) in your damn, stupid head of yours till you get it right. You must be perfect and not like those people who read Vietnamese up there (alter). You do, you're a disappointment."

My mom then left my room, saying her warning as I cried all day from what I received from my beloved family. I tried to forget all that happened and think about Kyle or Natalie, but it just made things worse.

"No one wants you! You're stupid! No one wants a stupid girl!"

"They're trying to steal your money. They're liars! They're criminals!"

"You don't deserve anything or anyone!"

"You're a disappointment."

"No friend shall love you. No man shall love you. No one shall love you."

Lies, lies, lies! I covered my face in my arms, bring my knees to my chest causing my stomach to be in major pain, but I didn't care.

I just want someone to understand me, comfort me in their arm, make me smile, giving sisterly advice and help me, but that person is missing.

I just want someone to make me laugh and make me roll my eyes at, but that person is missing.

I just want someone to comfort me in their arms, calmly stroke my hair, comfort me, whisper sweet, confident words in my ear, and kiss me, but that person is missing.

The day after, a friend of mine walks in. I would mention her name, but I'll just be calling people out and that's not nice. Anyways, I saw her come in with a guy, I presume was her boyfriend and she was walking towards me and then slap me.

"You don't understand anything!" she said.

I covered my cheek, red and stinging in pain.

I didn't understand what?

"You shouldn't have told him that. It wasn't your concern!"

"Well I was concerned about you and he was too!" I yelled, understanding what she meant.

"Sometimes people don't want others to know and be concern about. So, just don't let that happen again."

"Okay."

She slaps me one more time. "Also, don't you dare steal my boyfriend."

"What?"

I just then remembered that her boyfriend's name was Chris. Just like my ex-boyfriend's, who's now my best guy friend. Someone must have told her about the rumor and must have gotten confused with her Chris and the other Chris.

But it was too late for me to clear things up as she opens the door to reveal more of my friends. Most, which I did not want to see.

"I heard about Natalie being missing," one said.

"And your 'boyfriend' too," another added.

I just sat there, looking at the people in front of me in my room.

What are they getting at?

"Tiffany... They're dead."

"Get over it."

"It's been too long and they haven't shown up."

"Not many survived."

"You don't deserve them."

"You can't be friends with them."

"It's impossible."

"They're FAKE!"

"They're GONE!"

"They're DEAD!"

I was on the verge of tears, hearing this from the people that were betraying me and hurting me. The girl that slap me walks over to me and looks over to the other side of my bed. Looking over, I see Jessica in my eye of vision.

"What do you two want?" I asked.

"He's not coming home now," the both said in unison in my ears.

Kyle... My weakness...

I start to cry, knowing they refer to Kyle and everyone laughs as they left the room, thinking that I was lying about Natalie and the others this whole time... But I wasn't.

A few hours have pass, and I told myself to not speak or obey to anyone until Natalie, Alex or Kyle shows up. The doctors and nurses looks at me with worries and concern, my family called once or twice, but never came back for a visit. My closest friends begged me to speak telling them what's wrong and for me to eat, but nothing... I just sat or laid there, doing nothing physically and verbally.

I'm stupid, stubborn and a disappointment.

That's the person I am now that everyone keeps saying. Let it be. I'll be that kind of person. I deserve to be call like that. After all, most of my family (closest friends in Paris) are dead.

I just want to bang my head on the wall's corner and die already...

I didn't eat, sleep, talk, watch, anything... I just was there, looking out the window doing nothing, but thinking.

All I could think about is Natalie, Alex, and Kyle.

I will only speak once they appear.

My thoughts always drift back to Kyle and the memories we both shared. Usually it would be Natalie, but I feel like there was something missing and new. And with those thoughts, I close my eyes, singing my heart out in my head.

♪Said goodbye, turned around. And you were gone, gone, gone. Faded into the setting sun. Slipped away. But I won't cry. Cause I know I'll never be lonely. For you are the stars to me. You are the light I follow.♪

I felt tears running down my face at just the thought of the man the stole my heart and the man I now love and regret to 'push away'.

♪I will see you again, whoa. This is not where it ends. I will carry you with me, oh. 'Til I see you again.♪

I love Kyle so much... He's still out there, keeping his promise, to never leave me. I'll be waiting here, waiting to run back into his arms and kiss him from the times we were together and distanced.

♪I can hear those echoes in the wind at night. Calling me back in time. Back to you. In a place far away. Where the water meets the sky. The thought of it makes me smile. You are my tomorrow.♪

I love you...

♪I will see you again, whoa. This is not where it ends. I will carry you with me, oh. 'Til I see you again. Sometimes I feel my heart is breaking. But I stay strong and I hold on cause I know. I will see you again, whoa. This is not where it ends. I will carry you with me, yeah, yeah.♪

Please come home Natalie, Alex... Kyle.

♪I will see you again, whoa. This is not where it ends. I will carry you with me, oh. 'Til I see you again. 'Til I see you again. Said goodbye turned around. And you were gone, gone, gone."

This was just a dream...