" i just need you. "
" i know you do, and— its hard to...love another person when the other is already with another. "

...

" but do i really care about her? "
" ...raiden, please. don't dwell on it, i want to make you feel safe. as you should feel. "

— __ —

but should he really still think about it? that fucking night, when they were both in bed together after fighting raidens ex, that fucking senator, he couldn't stop thinking.

he didn't always think this way. it was just...samuel. there was something about him that made raiden think differently. the way his name rolled off of his tounge, the pet names. something about him calling him 'pretty boy' is so..weird. but it was so pleasant at the same time.

how much has changed? a lot. raiden doesn't know if he hates him, or not.

" why am i even thinking this way? "

he asks himself. he has a son. a wife. a family. hes known that for a long time. since big shell, and then...

the patriots.

he wasn't the same after that. they ruined his body so bad that he couldn't think of being human anymore.

where did jack go? gone.

where did snake go?..

who was raiden anymore?

so many questions that are yet to be answered, but couldn't be answered. he felt fucked up in the head from what all he has been through, but the thought of jetstream sam had those thoughts dissappear.

why did that name calm him so much? he wanted to cry.

he wanted to cry so bad it wasn't even funny.

just...why?