" Tanya, how is Auno? did you speak to him? when will he return?" Seema aunt, my mom in law's sister asked me.

It was Anurag's cousin's wedding today and the whole family is present, except.... my Auno sigh!

Anurag and I met at college, we had the usual kind of college love story.

We crossed each other's life in our final year, till then I was doing my own thing; hanging around with friends and studies and he with his sports and studies, he didn't have a lot of friends, he spoke little and kept to himself in spite of being in sports.

In our final year all the students were eager to watch the basket ball match which was happening in our college grounds with our college team in the final, I had no clue about any sport, but was dragged along with my friends to watch and cheer on.

As I watched the match, my eyes fell on Auno. When a good pass or shot was done by the teammates he would simply clap, his face devoid of any emotion and resume back to the game in seconds.

I found him erh, attitude types cause I thought he didn't like appreciating anyone and cares about himself alone, uh!.

I soon realised I was too quick to pass judgment, he shot a basket, and he just ran around taking his position,without bothering to get acknowledged, I narrowed my eyes at him and for the rest of the match my eyes didn't leave him, why? I don't know, I was very occupied watching him play, that I didn't realise my friends had bid bye and left.

We lost by one point, yet the whole college cheered on, I noticed the tired frame of Auno depart from the crazy crowd, I went after him, I called out to him "excuse me, excuse me " I didn't know his name back then, he turned around, an annoyed expression on his face, "hi, I'm Tanya, I'm doing my final year, you played well Congrats " I said cheerfully and extended my hand to him, he looked at my hand and then my face, he rolled his eyes, turned away and walked off haa!! I looked at him shocked, I went behind him and held his hand, he jerked it off violently, I lost my balance and was falling woo... I grabbed something as my eyes closed involuntarily, I still went down but stopped, my heart beats came back to me, I breathed heavily in and out, steadying myself, opened my eyes, I scanned the surrounding, I noticed Auno's face a few inches away from mine, his face was void of emotion but his eyebrows were narrow , his gaze burning me."what?" I said and raised my eyebrows, he rolled his eyeballs towards my body, I looked down, that's when I realised his arms around my hips, my eyes widened in shock, "move!" I said placing my palm on his broad chest, he stayed still, " this is what you girls want right? " he said with confidence in his voice.

"what nonsense? I didn't ask you any of this, who asked you to hold me?, let go, let go ." I said wriggling out, he looked to his side irritatedly and removed his hands, thud!! I fell on the ground haa?? this guy...

Soon we met again, I was in the infirmary, taking care of my friend who had caught the flu and had nausea, the nurse left the room for a few minutes, I was taking a look at the room, the door slowly opened I turned and saw that it was a badly bruised Auno, my heart felt heavy due to concern, being the softy I was I wanted to help him "ah! oh my God, come here " I said and led him to sit on a bed, I quickly took the cotton and rubbed antiseptic on it and dabbed it on his face, he flinched, I felt shaky seeing him like this.

As I was cleaning the wounds, the nurse arrived and took over, she needed help with tying the bandage on his hand and knee, I stayed and helped.

That was the first time we actually had a decent meet, we had coffee together that day,as per nurse's instruction, she told him to have something and according to Auno, coffee was good enough, weird guy! although he didn't tell a simple 'thank you', he didn't have the look of disgust, as if I was just like those spoilt girls, towards me.

In our final semester we had a common subject, during that hour, he always sat alone.

Slowly over time we sat together for that class, we started to text, and talk for a lot of hours, our friendship blossomed into love and over time, almost towards the end of college we were in a committed relationship.

After about two years we informed our parents of our love, my parents although unhappy about me falling in love and not waiting for them to choose a guy for me, accepted it. At first they assumed that I don't have trust on their choice. Once they met Auno, they were convinced that we had made the right choice.

On the other hand ...Auno's parents stopped talking to him and their relationship became strained, still Auno wanted us to stick together.

Against his parents' wish we married, they attended the wedding, but were totally distant.

Neither he nor his parents were willing to talk things out, we stayed at a seperate home, a few streets away from his parents' home.

Over a few months, I got a lot of opportunities to interact with Aunt and uncle(Auno's parents), their insecurity about me was slowly getting replaced with trust. They knew we were not going to let each other off any time soon or later. I started to feel the barriers breakthrough..I started to think of them as my own.

Auno didn't want to believe that his parents had changed, he felt that they were acting to be kind.

We had a good life although not the happiest one, as Auno never was the same to his parents,they decided to give him some time till he trusts them like before. His cousins were good to us when we met them at a few family functions.

Within 8 months of marriage I became pregnant, Auno was very happy, for a few days he pampered me.

I will never forget the way in which Auno reacted to my pregnancy. His face was gleaming all the way we returned home from the hospital, every step I took he watched me, I could feel his stare on my flat belly, his arm securely held my waist as we walked to our home.

That night I didn't have to argue with him for preparing diner, he woke me up in the morning to the smell of mouth watering food.

I smiled at his gestures and decided to savor all of it, God knows, he might get tired and soon I'll have to get back to doing the usual stuff.

A couple of months passed, my mom in law would visit me twice a week and I went to their place too.

Things were starting to be on track.

One evening when Auno came home, he looked guilty, the first few times I asked him,what had happened, he didn't reply, I let it go and walked to the kitchen to give him tea and snack.

I poured the tea in a cup and inhaled deeply, I could get the smell of Auno in the kitchen, I knew he had taken his shower.

I put some snacks on a plate, I could feel Auno's stare on my back, I turned around and saw that his face was deep in thought and sad, "Auno, I think I'm going to get fat with this baby, and then I will never be pretty, what do I do? "I said worry etched in my voice, I turned to the plate so that he doesn't see me smirk, I had to say weird things in order to change his mood.

I could feel him near me, he wrapped one hand around my waist, held my small bump and pulled me against his body, I felt goose bumps, the hair on the back of my neck stood, I leaned into his touch, his other arm wrapped around my shoulder, his head rested on mine, I smiled at him and ran my fingers over his hand to calm him, as I could feel his tensed posture.

"will you be fine if I'm not here to tell you how beautiful you would look when our baby grows inside, hmm?" he asked his voice teary

Without understanding I turned around, and we chatted over tea and dinner about what was bothering him. I had mixed feelings about the news.

Auno had received his appointment letter to work abroad for two years, I know how much he wanted to go abroad, it was his long term dream, he had also promised me that he would be by my side all through my pregnancy, I didn't want to let him go!!.

Making the more practical judgment and keeping our sentiments aside, Auno left.

For the first four months we used to Skype everyday and message each other about things, I moved in with my in laws.

Those four months also..he didn't talk to his parents a lot... he used to just enquire about them and they about him...I played the messenger.

I was eight months pregnant and I had my baby shower function, the last few days I just sent him a couple of texts as I was involved in the preparation for the function, I wanted to show Auno the whole program so I made the necessary arrangements.

On that day I tried connecting to him, but it just didn't work, I tried his other social networking accounts, they were also deactivated. I couldn't ponder a lot on it as I was called for the rituals.

The next day I again tried to contact him,but I couldn't connect to him, is he alright??,the worst of worst thought ran through my head, I went to our old home for a couple of days, I cried my lungs out, tears staining my cheeks, praying that Auno should be fine.

That night I slept on our bed wearing his shirt, somewhere deep down, I could feel his presence and that he is fine , and I trusted on that instinct more.

The next morning I went back home, for breakfast, the food was laid on the table, just the sight of food made me hungry, I lunged forward to take a plate, as my head spun, and my body involuntarily moved back, my vision got blur.

When I woke up I noticed that I was still hungry, I looked around, the doctor was in the room, I raised my and saw the drips that ran into my hand, realization hit me, eyes wide with fear, I felt my bump, I sighed in relief when it was still full.

My Mum in law, sat beside me brushing the stray strands away from my face, tenderly she held my palm and looked into my eye, "Tanya, you need to realise that inspite of all the work you have you cannot skip your meals, it will harm you and the kid "

I nodded "sorry mum, I don't know had had happened to me, I'll not let it happen again "

"good,we don't want Auno accusing me of not taking care of you, do we? she asked, I remembered
that I hadn't contacted him the last few days, I was fed some food and made to rest, once everyone left, I checked my phone for any notification, still nothing.

Sighing I left my phone and conversed with my kid; about its dad and how he was, I didn't know that I would remember the minute details, but I did and reminiscing memories each day, brought a certain calm to my heart, even though my anxiety grew by the fold as there was no way to find him.

To everyone, Auno was safe and talking to me, only I knew that I couldn't reach him, I tried contacting through his office but still it wasn't any use, with each passing day my efforts to search minimized, not that I gave up, it was just that I was always
surrounded by people.

soon days passed, I was rushed to the labour ward , cried, one for the pain in my stomach and for the pain that filled my heart, Auno wasn't there. The pain which hurt more was Auno's absence, how I wished I could talk to him, tell him the good news.

When I carried my baby girl in my arms tears welled my eyes, I kissed her forehead and whispered, "papa loves you" .

Our angel had Auno's hair, dark and silky. Each time our relatives stepped in to see our kid, they would comment on how similar she is to her dad, she had small lips and a birthmark on her neck just like me.

The very mention of Auno's name constricted my heart, I felt guilty and lonely, after all this while I can't tell anyone now that I have no clue about Auno, they might help, but I'm sure their anxiety would only make more chaos. I don't know if I was scared that I would get scoldings or the fact that I might have to face the hard and brutal truth, I was not prepared to think of negative stuff happening to him.

I tried my best to keep a straight face and reply to each one with excitement about an imaginary conversation we shared.

Days passed on, I cried every night, I felt relief in the tears, it simply meant that he is real and that I still have emotions for him, I felt relieved that his memories were still alive with me.

Our daughter became the center of the world for me. I named our angel,Ananya [an-anurag anya-tanya].She was the best thing that happened to me, in the midst of all the confusion, of what I'm doing, keeping her in mind I could take sane decisions.

Many a time, I did wonder, how is it that my life has taken this path, I don't know if my husband is alive or not, if he's not, what am I doing enjoying my life?

My Ananya's smile was the reason I wanted to stay strong, give her a secure and happy life, the kind of life which Auno wanted to give her.

Now Ananya is two years, she is happily toddling around the wedding hall, till today I have no clue as to where Auno is, yet I replied, "he's fine aunty,except that he's put on weight after going there " I laugh along with her, she leaves and I march to find Ananya, she's a sweetheart but when no one is around her she tends to get into trouble, I spot her playing with the flower petals at the entrance, I go up to her "baby,come see uncle is calling"

"uncle?mamma see" she stretched her hands out smiling, her hand was a mess. It was sticky as she played with rock candy and squished the petals " baby!! I've told you na...look at you, dirty girl " I said and patted her cheek, to which she smiled wide and made gurgling noise.

I took her to the room to wash her hand first, inside the room a few kids were chatting, each one telling how great their dad is.

I noticed Ananya's eyes look at them, she stood in front of me pointed towards herself " Ananya pappa " and she shook her hands as if asking me 'where'.

My heart beats raised, I was going to tell her a lie and it wasn't easy to lie to an innocent soul. "pappa,i-is abroad, he is busy, he has bought lots of gifts for you" I said stuttering, and widening my eyes so that she believed, hopefully it worked, she smiled happily and skipped away to her uncle who is newly married.

Later in the night, Ananya once again asked me if she could talk to pappa, I some how distracted her to sleep.

It was times like these that I got angry with Auno, why couldn't he call? I felt dead, why should I go through this, I miss him everyday in everything I do, I miss his arm around me, I miss listening to his slow breathing, the spark which runs through me by his mere look, I miss irritating him, yelling at him, I miss his smell, I need him to be here soon, I don't know how long I can go on with these lies, I really hope it finishes soon.

In a few months it was time for Ananya to start her schooling, every day with her was a learning experience for me, the energy and questions she has keeps me going, when she falls ill its hard to pass the day.

I moved back to the home Auno and I stayed, the memories we made in there could not be felt anywhere else.

Ananya didn't ask me further questions about her dad, one night I heard her pray, tears fell as I listened to her "God, I thank you for giving me mamma, mamma feel sad without pappa, bring pappa home, please, I want to see pappa ...."

I don't know if something happened in her school because of which she misses him so much.

I went to the other room, "God I really hope Auno is safe, please help him to return to us, we all miss him a lot,if not for me at least for Ananya, please don't deprive her of being with her father, please God."

A few weeks passed by, Ananya was napping after she came home, I was in the kitchen laying some evening snacks for her. The door bell rang, I washed my hands and wiped it on a napkin and opened the door.

I froze, I just stared, warmth grew in my heart and tears filled my eyes, a smile formed on my lips, Auno was there, in front of my eyes, he looked pale and weak, dark circles were around his eyes, he didn't look that healthy, he took two slow steps forward and reached out for me, I went forward and nuzzled my face in his shoulder, once again my heart fluttered, I smiled as he held me tight, I could feel him breathe heavily, I broke off from the hug and led him inside, he gulped down some water hastily and pulled my waist, I was wearing a sari as Ananya and I had planned to go to the temple .

His fingers slowly, as if this was the first time moved on my waist, and pulled me to him, my breathing became heavy, and goose bumps filled my hands, even after so many years, I still felt the same and I felt it only for this man,I realised I missed feeling like this, I went close to him, and wrapped my hands around his neck, I stood on my toes and kissed his forehead "how are you? " he asked in his husky voice, tears began to fall.

" I missed you so much ...I had no clue what happened to you and I didn't tell anyone that I can't contact you, it was too difficult " I sobbed

"shh..its okay...I've got you" he lay my head on his shoulder and let my tears stain his shirt, he rubbed,soothing circles on my back

"I was falsely accused for an illegal crime my boss committed and sent to jail, I wasn't allowed to contact anyone. Yesterday, my boss was finally caught and I was proved innocent, I took the next available flight and reached here."he said as we sat on the sofa.

Go have a bath first, we'll all go to the temple and meet your parents,they've been really sweet to me even though you weren't here. I took his bag and went inside the room, he followed me, I opened the hot water tap so that he could have a warm bath, I stepped out, I saw Auno kneeling beside the bed, looking at our angel's face, he moved the hair away from her face and kissed her forehead.

"Auno, she is just like you in a lot of ways, she was waiting to see you, she will be really happy when she sees you and I am sure that you both will get along really well" I said and he smiled
"you think so? " he said and I nodded negatively
"I know so, get ready and come,by then I'll get her ready, okay? " I said
"wait, what did you name her?" he asked stopping me
"Ananya, so that she knows that her parents love each other a lot and she is their angel, and will always have our love " I said, Auno kissed me on my cheek and went to the bathroom.

I woke up Ananya, in her half sleepy state I managed to get her ready, she drank milk, placed the glass down and asked "mamma, did something happen,you are smiling from that time "

"yes, I have a surprise for you, wait a little longer, go play for sometime, till we leave, okay?" I said she smiled happily and went off to our neighbour's home.

I poured tea in two cups and placed it on a tray, I felt Auno's fragrance hit my nostrils, how I missed his smell, this brought me memories from the past, I inhaled deeply, I felt strong hands wrap around my waist, once again his fingers lingered on my bare waist, liking his presence I leaned into him, I could feel his breath on my shoulder, till his lips touched my sensitive spot and nibbled it. His finger drew circles around my belly button, my stomach felt knotted, he turned me around, that's when I realised that I was on my toes, I rested my hands on his shoulder while he pulled me more into him, his eyes not escaping mine, he ducked his head a little, I stretched my neck and our lips touched, he sucked hungrily on my lips while I tried to move with the same passion, we broke the kiss when we needed air, Auno rested his forehead on mine " I love you" " love you too" I replied and Auno pecked my lips quickly.

There was a knock on the door, I opened it, it was Ananya "mamma, shall we go" her eyes twinkled with expectation as we would be going to Auno's parents's home and there was Ananya's new born cousin, she was very eager to see her.

" wait anya" I said smiling " surprise! " I said opening the door wider so that she could see Auno.

She stared blankly at Auno, narrowing her eyes, when she realised who it was her eyes widened in surprise, a wide smile on her face "pappaaa..." she said running to him, Auno bent down and caught her in his arms,soon she started blabbing something about her school.

I just stood loving the way my family is complete. This moment I've imagined it in so many different ways, but reality was so much better, this is a perfect moment, I'll cherish it forever. This guy who didn't talk to anyone fell in love and my God what a different person he is once you get to know him, I'm glad to have fallen for him and happier that he is back.