thirty-four || the first rumors spark

ʚ♡ɞ

"My love, you can't be avoiding lunch anymore."

Yeonjun looked up from his desk and over at Soobin who stood in front of him, staring at him with a saddened smile. It irritated him so much. "Just leave me alone, don't call me that stupid ass nickname anymore."

"How could I not call you it when you are my love?" Soobin frowned softly, walking around the desk and sat next to the male who buried his face back into his arms. "You've ignored me long enough now, Jun, you can't keep avoiding everyone."

"Easy for you to say," Yeonjun mumbled, annoyed by Soobin's nonsense talking. "You're not the one who was hurt by your best friend, fucking embarrassing."

"...But I was hurt," Soobin said softly, causing the male next to him to stare at him with widened eyes. "Beomgyu's my best friend too you know? I'm really hurt he lied to me... to us, but I can't hold that against him. He had his reasons."

Yeonjun stared at his boyfriend for a few seconds, slightly reconsidering what he had just said. Yet he was still far too angry at Beomgyu to process anything, he was so pissed off.

For three months, his best friend, the one he trusted the most betrayed him.

He just couldn't believe that this entire time, he had lied to him. That he had truly liked Soobin from the start and he just had to ruin it all by opening his mouth to defend him from that bitch ass Seong-jin.

It made him feel so foolish, like he doesn't deserve Soobin now.

"Do you want to talk about it...?"

Yeonjun sat up straight and shook his head, if he were to talk about what had happened, he was certain he would explode at Soobin like he did with Beomgyu.

It really did frustrate him, a major part of him was so upset, betrayed. But the other half knew that the younger had his reasons as Soobin said, but he just couldn't bring himself to just accept it as that.

"I just..." Yeonjun started off slowly, his eyes stinging from how badly he wanted to break down. "I'm just hurt, I trusted him not to do something so stupid, I trusted him with my feelings. I just feel so taken advantage of."

"I just feel like after what happened, I'm not enough for you."

"Don't say that hyung." Soobin scooted his chair closer and awkwardly side hugged the male who immediately relaxed in his hold. "I understand how betrayed you feel, feelings are never worth to be taken advantage of, and all of it is valid."

"But think about Beomgyu," He continued on, causing Yeonjun to side eye him uncomfortably. "You know he never has bad intentions, he wanted to help you... in the worst way possible."

"It didn't help anything."

"It helped me realize I loved you more than him," Soobin countered the males words, but realized how rude that lowkey sounded. "In a romantic way, you know."

Yeonjun's ears were burning red when he had heard Soobin say that, it made some of the anger in his stomach fade away, but it wasn't enough.

No matter how much he didn't want to blame Beomgyu, he felt so hurt. He had trusted the male, he had believed every single word he said about him and Taehyun. It just hurt knowing that this entire time, he was fooled.

"You have to understand that it's not Beomgyu to fully blame," Soobin leaned forward so he could a better view of Yeonjun's face. "Taehyun also was in on it as well, they're both in the wrong, but that doesn't mean they deserve such harsh treatment."

Yeonjun scoffed loudly, he knew that both of those idiots were in on it together, he was mad at the both of them. He just honestly still couldn't believe that they were in a fake relationship that entire time, it looked so real... they acted so real.

Then it hit him, what Taehyun had told him a couple days before, that he had truly loved Beomgyu.

It made him sick, if he did like Beomgyu, then why would he admit to what had happened? Why not defend him? Why did he end everything?

So many unanswered questions he wished he had the answer to, but he didn't dare ask as he was too upset at both of them to talk.

"It doesn't matter," Yeonjun shook Soobin's hand off of him, crossing his arms as he looked away. "I'm too fucking mad at them to even face them."

"Are you really upset at them..." Soobin leaned back, frowning softly. "...or are you just upset at yourself?"

What Soobin said hit Yeonjun like a truck, all of the males anger suddenly turned into sickening guilt as he slowly looked over at his boyfriend who had seemed to figure him out before he could figure himself out.

The male opened his mouth to counter back at what Soobin had just said, but instead of a snarky annoyed remark, the male closed his mouth and silently gave up, knowing that what his boyfriend said was right.

"I was right, huh?" Soobin spoke up after allowing Yeonjun to relax for a bit. "You aren't fully angry at him?"

"I just..." Yeonjun mumbled softly, trying to find the right words to say without making it seem so stupid. "I... feel like this is my fault, he sacrificed so much, I feel like he would've been so much more happier if I never said anything."

Soobin sighed softly and shook his head, Yeonjun was so stubborn, it was nearly impossible for the male to even understand anything from someone else's perspective, but he cared... he really did care a lot about those he loved.

"If I'm honest hyung," Soobin gently grabbed his shoulder and turned him around so he was facing him. "I think Beomgyu would've been more miserable than happier."

"Why do you say that...?"

"Well, from what I observed," Soobin paused as he tried to recollect his memories before smiling. "He looked so much more happier with Taehyun than me. Somehow, Taehyun managed to bring out a side of Beomgyu that nobody could do. He made him for confident, comfortable, and free. Think about it, if he were with me, would he even change for the better?"

Yeonjun took in every word the blonde said and let it soak in his mind for a few minutes, once he was done with that, the male groaned loudly and immediately slammed his face onto his desk, causing a loud thud to happen.

"Yeonjun?!" Soobin flinched from the sudden action and immediately grabbed onto his head gently, lifting it up so he could get a clear look. "Why did you—"

"I'm an idiot."

"I mean yeah but don't hurt yourself—"

Yeonjun rolled his eyes and stood up from his desk, looking over at Soobin who immediately stood up after him and stared at him curiously. "Are we getting lunch or not?"

"Oh!" The blondes eyes beamed happily, a fond smile growing on his lips as he nodded. "Yeah! Let's go eat, i'm starving."

The two of them began to walk out of the classroom in silence, neither of them bothered to say anything after what had just happened, which Yeonjun was honestly thankful for since he had time to recollect his thoughts.

"You know, you have to talk to him eventually."

I know.

He knew he had to face Beomgyu one way or another, no matter how upset he was at the male, he knew no amount of ignoring would drive the male away unless he said he genuinely wanted him gone. But all of those thoughts and memories of how harsh he was to Beomgyu stabbed at his heart so badly.

He felt bad, but he was so angry.

"By the way," Soobin spoke up once more. "We're eating with Taehyun and Huening Kai."

Man, what the fuck.

ʚ♡ɞ

For the past few days, Beomgyu has been spending time with Seong-jin and the others more, he hasn't recently talked to Yeonjun or Soobin lately... he figured it was better to just continue to give space until the elder was ready to talk.

"He was super cute!"

"Not really."

Beomgyu couldn't help but tune out the conversation and just focus on his own thoughts, it really was mentally exhausting having to just wait it out for his friends to talk to him again. He really wanted to fix things between him and Yeonjun, he really did.

But what he wanted most was to talk to Taehyun again, it's been nearly two weeks and neither of them have spoken to one another ever since what had happened, which was understandable.

But his desire to have Taehyun back and adore him properly grew every single day, he was certain that if it wasn't for Seong-jin and his kindness to distract him, he most definitely would've fallen down a deeper hole of insanity.

"Isn't that Choi Yeonjun?"

Beomgyu snapped out of his deep thoughts right away and looked up, looking over at Miyuki who pointed at a specific table in the lunch room. Slowly following the direction where she pointed, his heart dropped down to his stomach.

There was Yeonjun, sitting with Taehyun, Huening Kai, and Soobin at one table. All four of them looking slightly happy as one another talked to each other.

It made his stomach clench in pain and his heart throb with sadness.

They're all together without him.

Forcing himself to look away, the male bit on the bottom of his lip and tried his best not to be bothered by it, which was quite hard since it literally fucking pained him seeing his friends together without him.

"Hey, Beomgyu, are you okay?"

The male looked over at Seong-jin who stared at him curiously, it seemed like he really was observant by how much he had asked him if he was fine lately.

As badly as Beomgyu wanted to say he was fine, he knew it was better to be honest with his feelings.

"Just a little bit upset, that's all, but overall I'm fine!" He tried his best to put on an encouraging smile.

Seong-jin stared at the male for a few seconds before looking over his shoulder and saw what specifically made Beomgyu uncomfortable, once he realized, he couldn't help but smirk slightly knowing what he could do to take advantage of the situation.

"I cannot believe Choi Yeonjun did that to you! You guys cut contact for a little and now he's hanging around with your ex boyfriend? I guess Choi Soobin isn't enough for him."

Beomgyu's head snapped in the direction of where Seong-jin stood, his eyes widening in disbelief as to what he had just said. "Wh-What?"

"Look at him, he's clearly trying to do something strange." Seong-jin scoffed, frowning pitifully for Beomgyu. "I feel bad for you, he's such a terrible person."

Beomgyu remained silent but slowly looked over towards the table where his friends sat, an unknowing painful feeling bloomed in his stomach when he saw a small smile form on Yeonjun's lips.

He knew that he shouldn't overthink what Seong-jin said since the male had totally misunderstood what the situation was. He knew that Yeonjun loved Soobin a lot, it would've been odd if he had suddenly gained feelings for Taehyun.

Beomgyu shook his head softly. "Don't misunderstand, I'm certain there's no bad intentions behind his actions."

Seong-jin's face flushed a light shade of red in embarrassment, his eyes flickering over towards Yoshino who just snorted slightly before covering her face.

It really started to piss him off.

"You should tell us what happened between you and Choi Yeonjun." Seong-jin smiled sweetly after regaining his cool. "So you could feel better and we could make you feel better!"

Beomgyu pursed his lips tightly, he knew it was better to not announce the whole situation to others, so with a soft sigh he shook his head. "We just had a disagreement, that's all."

Seong-jin watched as Beomgyu walked away with Miyuki to go get food, leaving behind him and Yoshino once more.

"You know," Yoshino spoke up after noticing how angry the male was getting. "You can still use what he said to your advantage."

"How? Nobody will take it, it's so fucking annoying." Seong-jin groaned loudly, shaking his head as the two of them slowly walked behind.

"Don't worry," Yoshino smirked, looking over at a table with a few girls she was familiar with. "You can trust me."

Seong-jin breathed in softly and nodded his head, looking over at Beomgyu who was happily greeted by other classmates, it made him sick.

He was willing to do anything to ruin the males reputation.

ʚ♡ɞ

"...hey did you hear about Choi Yeonjun...?"

"No?"

"Well I heard he did this..."

"Are you serious?!"

Beomgyu was quite confused why there was so many people whispering to one another the moment he walked into the classroom, he was also confused why so many people stared at him with a pitiful expression.

It was really weird not gonna lie, everyone was suddenly whispering and staring at him, were they talking about him and Taehyun? He wouldn't be surprised.

But it was really uncomfortable, so the male walked over to two girls who were whispering between themselves, he knew them since they were very nice to him during a project.

"Hello Chaewon, Kazuha." Beomgyu greeted the two who instantly froze up when he came by. "Why is everyone whispering?"

Chaewon seemed uncomfortable for a few seconds, glancing over at Kazuha who just looked away to avoid anything.

"Well..." She spoke up softly, a pitiful smile formed on her lips. "We just heard something about... Choi Yeonjun."

Beomgyu's eyebrows furrowed down slightly when he heard that, tilting his head slightly he glanced over at his other classmates who had just looked away from him.

"What?"

"Well we just heard that you both got into a fight because he wanted Kang Taehyun..."

It was like an arrow was pierced through his heart when he had heard her say that, all of his thoughts began to bundle up as he tried to think about what to say.

"Who told you that...?" He managed to croak out when he finally regained his conscious. "That's not true."

"It was Yoshino and Seong-jin, they told us because they say you were treated wrong."

Beomgyu's mouth felt dry, his throat was closing up as he looked around the classroom as his classmates stared at him with a pitiful expression, it made him sick.

Shaking his head, the male immediately rushed out of the classroom and into the hallway where he saw Seong-jin and Yoshino walking down at a very slow pace, which made him relieved knowing that he didn't have to wait for them to arrive to class.

"Seong-jin, Yoshino," Beomgyu called out for them when he approached them with a slight frown. "Can we talk?"

Seong-jin glanced over at him with a confused expression, which lowkey looked like an irritated one but Beomgyu decided not to question that. "What is it?"

"Why are you spreading rumors that Yeonjun and I got into a fight because he wanted to take Taehyun from me?"

Both Seong-jin and Yoshino were quite taken aback by that question, one frowning as one shook their head immediately.

"We didn't mean it like that!" Seong-jin pouted, innocence drowning in his tone. "We just thought that was what happened! We didn't want you to be a victim!"

Beomgyu felt at ease knowing Seong-jin didn't mean it in a bad way, but he still felt uncomfortable by how the male handled it. It was his place to talk about what had happened between him and Yeonjun, especially when he was spreading misinformation about what truly happened.

"I appreciate you trying to stick up for me," He breathed out softly, trying to ease down his panic. "But next time, please don't spread false information, especially when it's about my friends."

Seong-jin smiled and nodded as he watched Beomgyu turn around and walk away, once the male was far enough he immediately let his smile drop and turn into an irritated scowl as he scoffed loudly.

"He's so fucking annoying." He mumbled under his breath, which was loud enough for Yoshino to hear. "His kindness is so fake."

"Please, what's he going to do about it?"

"I don't know," Seong-jin sighed, shaking his head as he looked over at Beomgyu who was happily talking to Soobin, anger sparking in his heart when he saw that. "But all I know is that I'm not done trying to ruin his reputation."

Yoshino stared at Seong-jin for a few seconds and nodded, looking away from the male as he walked over to another group of guys who were obviously talking about the rumor with Beomgyu and Yeonjun.

If anything, she knew Seong-jin wasn't going to stop until he got what he wanted.

ʚ♡ɞ

Beomgyu had hoped that after talking to Seong-jin about the rumor with Yeonjun, everything would calm down. Yet he was so so wrong.

Instead of the heat with the rumors dying down, there were more rumors happening even more.

He wasn't sure if it was because of Seong-jin's doing or not but for the past two weeks there has been constant circulation between him, Yeonjun, and Taehyun.

It was really starting to piss him off.

Sighing softly, the male looked out the window and tried to regain his focus, his eyes stinging with tears as he tried to clear his mind from everything.

It really did hurt though, he knew Yeonjun would never pull that type of bullshit, but he also couldn't help but be so jealous that he was hanging out with Taehyun and Huening Kai as if there weren't any issues.

It really did hurt.

He wanted nothing more than to fix anything.

What bothered him the most though, that throughout everything, he was in a mess full of emotions.

He was so angry at Taehyun at first, then he became ashamed and guilty. Guilty that in reality this was all his doings.

Then he became ashamed, ashamed that he couldn't do anything to mend what they had.

But what really bothered him so much was that he was certain after everything he would just be angry at Taehyun, but instead he continued to run into the male everywhere and saw him in places he hadn't expected to see him in.

Just seeing Taehyun made him want to break down and cry...

The male didn't even realize that his vision began to become blurry, his breathing uneasy, and his heart pounding against his chest the more he thought about his friends.

Why did they have to be together...?

They looked so happy without me.

It's not fair...

But I did this to myself.

In that split second, the male began to break down as he covered his mouth immediately to silence his sobs. Letting those warm tears fall down his cheeks as he closed his eyes to try and stop himself from crying.

"Beomgyu...?"

The males eyes widened when he had heard someone behind him, he was so certain that the hallway he was in didn't have anyone near him.

His heart was thumping against his chest, a part of him hoped and wish that it was Taehyun who had stumbled upon him.

But when he turned around, his hopes were shattered when he saw Huening Kai standing there in shock.

"Hyung are you okay?"

Beomgyu couldn't help but burst into tears harder, the younger immediately walking towards him and pulling him into a tight hug as he began to sob loudly into his chest.

He couldn't help but he so blinded by his guilt.

No matter how hard he wanted to hate Taehyun, how he wanted to blame him for everything.

He couldn't.

Instead, he was always thinking about him, wishing that everything would go back to the way it was, wishing he could turn back time and end this whole situation.

He was grateful Huening Kai didn't bother asking anything further, he would've been so ashamed to admit that the reason he was sobbing was because of Taehyun and Yeonjun.

But he couldn't help but be so jealous.

it wasn't fair... that he didn't get the chance to talk to them.

Closing his eyes, the male couldn't help but breath heavily as he tried to ignore the pain in his heart, all of the rumors that he knew weren't true got to him as they stabbed at his heart multiple times, creating a sickening feeling in his heart and mind.

No matter how badly I want to hate you, to get rid of all these feelings...

... i can't help but always think of you when you're gone...

I wish you were here... Taehyun.

ʚ♡ɞ