~ What is truly frightening is the betrayal you can not see. ~

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Important note: The chapter which was previously marked as Chapter 13 is a part of CHAPTER 8 now. The CURRENT CHAPTER 13 was previously marked as Chapter 19 ( part II). If you still have any confusion while reading, feel free to ask away:)

                            ***

I have lost track of the countless text messages I have sent Ricky since that day. He did not respond to any. We weren't officially dating yet but both of us did acknowledge our feelings for one another. We were planning to take it slow but Alexander had to ruin everything.

I turned up at his house last evening but he was already out by then. I look down at the last message I sent him exactly forty - three minutes ago.

To: Rickydy pie

Can you please calm down and listen to me just once? I swear you misunderstood the whole scenario. There is absolutely NOTHING going on between Alexander and I. Please talk to me. I really miss you.

I have never felt this lonely in my life before because no matter what problems I have gone through, Ricky has always been my rock. Someone I can turn to at any time of the day and be assured that he'll always be there.

Over the years, just like the way he dated other girls, I too have dated a few guys. None of them were serious relationships and the longest I have been together with someone is for not more than six months.

It was just exhausting to spend time with a person when you'd rather spend it with someone else. I did wait for him all these years and I am still waiting now. He would never know how my heart clenched and my insides burned whenever I saw him dating a different girl but the hardest part of it was sitting and spending time along with them and pretending to be happy like everything is perfectly fine.

I decide to retire for the night as I have got to go to school tomorrow morning. Plugging my phone to the adapter and turning off the lights, I pass out as soon as my body collapses on the bed.

The next day as I walked to the school entrance, I observe many students whispering and eyeing my way. Shrugging it off as nothing, I continued to walk ahead ignoring the uncomfortable feeling that settled down in the pit of my stomach.

I pause to read a text message when I hear the notification ping go off, hoping I have finally received a reply from Ricky. Unfortunately, it was a text message from Alexander.

From: Alexander

June if you haven't reached school yet then please don't come today. Call in sick or anything but please DO NOT COME.

I roll my eyes at his so-called warning and place the phone back in my pant pocket. Of course, he would start acting as he cares about me now that he has removed Ricky from the equation but I'll never forgive him.

In fact, I have come to a decision to have a talk with Professor Daigo today and get rid of the tutoring responsibility. Losing my grades or not, I want Alexander ten metres away from me at all times.

There is a crowd formed near our lockers and I mentally groan for having to deal with people at seven in the morning but to my surprise, the crowd parted like the Red Sea when I reached them. Students elbowed each other gesturing and pointing towards me while I could feel a few sophomores snickering as I passed.

Why is everybody behaving so weirdly today?

As my locker came into view, my eyes widened and a gasp left my mouth. Spray painted with red colour across my locker, four letters in bold stood glaring at me.

SLUT!

The meaning behind that word was as clear as the day.

"Who wrote this?" I asked as I frantically looked around the crowd. Not a single person standing there answered my question instead the sound of muffled voices in the hall rose.

"I asked who wrote this!" I yelled at everyone as my voice resonated through the hallway.

"I did it."

My eyes narrowed to slits as I look at Amber proudly admitting to her wrongdoing like she has just been awarded the Oscar but my breath falters when I see the person standing next to her.

Ricky.

Amber follows my line of sight and she sticks closer to Ricky deliberately.

"Stop eye-fucking him hoe," she says menacingly. "Desperate girls like you who put up an innocent front are the worse kind of toxic people and Ricky doesn't need you in his life."

My gaze lingers over Ricky for the longest time hoping he will intervene and tell everyone the show that Amber is putting up but to my disappointment, he doesn't. He just stands there eyes void of any emotion as his soul fewer eyes pierce my heart. I knew I did not have to prove myself in front of these people whom I am sure I'll never be seeing after graduation but Ricky doesn't need to question my loyalty.

It was a misunderstanding and I know he is upset but calling me out and slut-shaming me this way in front of everyone wasn't expected of him.

''Ricky say something," I plead him with my eyes. "Please."

He does not. He stands there stiff as a statue not moving a muscle while Amber takes this opportunity to link their arms together dragging him a few steps forward.

''You always liked Ricky!" Amber exclaims. "And you took him for granted. Greedy hoes like you will never be content with what you have. No wonder you couldn't keep your hands off Alexander in the name of tutoring," she spits with revulsion in her voice.

What?

"Why are you putting the blame on me?" I yell back at her. ''And since when did you start caring about other's feelings?"

''Stop playing the victim card, June. We all know how you almost managed to get yourself raped by your driver back in eighth grade." She lets out a maniacal laugh.

"Your loaded parents might have tried to bury the truth but we all know who was eager to spread her legs." She pauses to let her words sink in.

"Though now I wonder if you actually had sex with him but later pushed the blame on to him to avoid any inconvenience."

I could clearly hear the gasps and whisperings from the people around at the revelation of this piece of information. A part of my life that was long forgotten. The part of me that buried this nightmare years ago and shoved these secrets deep inside. A secret I only told Ricky about and he promised to take this secret along with him to his grave.

Then how did Amber find out about it?

My vision clouded with unshed tears as I felt the betrayal like a sharp knife, searing my flesh and cutting deep to the bone. Never in my wildest imagination would I have suspected Ricky of all people but the answer was right there in front of me. Loud and clear.

"I am so disgusted thinking we breathe the same air as you. I am not surprised you could stoop down that low just because no one wanted to fuck you!" One of Amber's minion, Gretchen spoke out aloud.

"You didn't get pregnant, did you?" another voice chimed in.

Then the accusations and slut-shaming flows in as various people start speaking and yelling at once. Few of the things they said pierced my eardrums and I blinked back the tears that threatened to fall out any second now.

"Filthy creature."

"Desperate hoe."

"Unwanted child."

"Lost her virginity to a driver."

"Cheated on Ricky with the new guy."

"Part-time prostitute."

I try to block out all the voices and focus on my breathing. The one person who was the closest to my heart and meant the world to me have turned his back on me today. Ricky did not utter a single word the entire time but his silence hit me the hardest. This was like a punch in the gut.

"Be grateful we only spray-painted on your locker. The next time we won't go this easy on you," Amber warns as she crosses both her arms in front of her chest and tries to look intimidating, the look of abhorring on her face well-defined.

Another one of Amber's minions, Karen, steps forward and before even I could comprehend her next action, I feel a stinging sensation on my left cheek. "I have wanted to do that for so long," she smirks maliciously.

"She deserves more than that Karen," Amber chuckles.

Addressing the crowd that has got quite bigger now due to the commotion, she says, "Anyone want a turn to get even with June? You guys can kick, punch, slap or even smash her pathetic face. I don't mind." When no one responds, she comes up with another scheme.

"Whoever hits her can sit and hang out once a month with the popular group during lunch."

I notice how so many of the eyes perk up at the sound of this idea. I could not understand how people could be so inhumane. You would go to the extent of raising your hand on another person just so you get to spend one day with the popular group during lunch.

"Amber this is too much. I think - '' I hear Ricky's voice talking but Amber cuts him off.

"You need to stop caring about her Ricky. If she really loved you what was she doing with Alexander. Did you ever try to think about that?" she asks planting the seed of doubt in his mind. "She took you for granted. Don't you see that? You were always her back and call, that's it."

Karen grabs a handful of my hair in her fist and pulls my head backwards as I try to free myself out of her grip. Gretchen grabs both my hands painfully and twists it holding it backwards trapping me in place. The tears are already streaming down my cheeks but the lump in my throat made it difficult to breathe. I whimpered as their hold tightened but what hurt the most was looking at my best friend standing three feet away and not doing anything about it.

Am I that despicable?

Just when I was losing all hope, a figure suddenly appeared from behind and shoved both Gretchen and Karen forcefully, making them fall on the cold tiled floor. "I don't hit women but if I see any of you doing this again, I will personally come and smash your face." Alexander deadpanned.

He walks up to Amber and utters a single word. "Apologize."

"What are you talking ab -" Amber starts but Alexander does not let her finish.

"Apologize to June right now," he screams at her so loud I swear I felt the building tremble for a second. Amber jumps up in surprise and mutters a ''sorry". I am sure she did it probably because she was scared out of her wits.

"YOU -" he points a finger directly at Amber and warns, "If I ever see you anywhere near June no matter whatsoever the reason is, be mentally prepared to deal with me the next day. You cannot even imagine what I am capable of." I don't miss the underlying meaning behind those words. The subtle hint in his warning spoke out too loud.

He turns around and grabs my wrist carefully treating it as if a little pressure and it might snap into two. "Let me get you out of here," he whispers and even though he was the last person I wanted to see since morning but at that moment, I complied and nodded my head at him. He pauses and says, "Ricky if you really love someone learn to trust their loyalty to you. People will always try to break you apart but you should know better."

Finally turning around to face him, he confesses. "The other day nothing happened between June and I. I faked the entire thing the other day just to make June realise how much you actually trust her. And I am sure she has got her answer today."

Ricky's eyes widen in surprise as he realizes his mistake and his face is masked with guilt and embarrassment.

"Let's go to June." Alexander takes my hand and guides me out of the school towards the parking lot.

If someone would have told me a month back that I would willingly go away with Alexander one day, I would have simply laughed it off on their face but life can surprise you in unimaginable ways and the person you least expect from, turns out to be your good wisher instead.

                             ***

Alexander drove us somewhere out of town and after almost an hour, the car came to a halt in front of a forest. It looked like the dead end. Under the different circumstance, I would have never sat down in a car with someone who is practically a stranger and let them drive me just anywhere but given today's events, I am seriously going to have some trust issues with people from now on. So, instead of being the usual me and bombarding him with questions, I let him guide me as we went deeper into the forest.

Finally, after a couple of minutes, we came to a small clearing. Moving forward another hundred metres, I realise it's the end of a cliff overlooking a lake below. I stared ahead in awe as I was mesmerized by the picturesque view. The scenery of the sun rising over the water on an early October morning was simply breathtaking. The lake was bathed in a golden hue by the gentle sunlight and the water was as clear as crystal. I sat down on the grassy bed and Alexander settled next to me.

"Why did you help me?'' I find myself asking him as I pick up a pebble and throw it down to the lake and watch as it bounces on the surface and finally sinks in creating ripples as it got larger and larger which swam for a short distance into the lake.

"What do you think?" he questions me back. I do not understand his response but chose not to press it.

"You know -" I slowly start pausing for a fraction of a second breathing heavily. "No one ever tells you how much it hurts. It hurts being in love," I whimpered as a sob escaped my lips. ''They will all tell you the good parts of a relationship and how much joy it can bring to someone but they won't talk about the tears and efforts that goes behind a successful relationship."

Alexander very cautiously places his right hand over my left one squeezing it lightly as if to silently say that he is listening and he will be here.

I look upwards towards the high sunlit clouds that drifted across a clear blue sky. "I have always loved him. I would wait for him even when he would promise to show up for a hangout and then ditch me at the last moment because of some other girl. This has happened a lot over the years. I would go to parties third-wheeling along with Naomi and Nick or I would still keep waiting for him in the parking lot after his basketball games only to find out later that he has already left with his teammates when he was the one asking me to wait for him in the first place." I let out a small laugh.

Blinking back the tears, I bite the inside of my cheek hard drawing blood in the process and feeling the metallic taste in my mouth.

"I was almost raped four years back,'' my voice comes out hoarse. He squeezes my hand reassuringly.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

I shake my head letting him know I am fine. ''His name was John. His mother had an affair with my father long before I was born. My father only found out about him when he showed up at our house one evening and claimed that he was my father's son. My mother went mad with anger after finding out that he indeed was my father's biological son. I still remember that day quite clearly."

"We later got to know that his mom committed suicide because of the numerous debts that she was unable to pay and left her son a note telling about my father. He was three years older than me and because my father is a reputed figure in this town, they could not risk anyone ever finding out the truth behind his real identity. My mother agreed to let him stay in our house but only as a worker to avoid gossip from prying eyes."

I inhale sharply because remembering and telling it all out loud was the hardest which meant it was real. "John agreed with my parents' conditions quite readily as he was just glad to have a roof over his head. The first couple of months it was fine until... one night he sneaked inside my room while I was asleep."

''Where were your parents that night?" Alexander asks suddenly.

Shrugging my shoulders I say, ''They were on a business trip for the weekend. They flew to San Francisco three days earlier."

I almost missed the look of contempt on Alexander's face as I mentioned my parents.

"So imagine my surprise when I see my step brother's naked body hovering over mine and he pulls the comforter hard before tossing it to the floor."

By now I can slowly start feeling a lump form in my throat. Swallowing hard I continue, "He grabs my face forcefully and kisses me hard. He bit me on my neck and other various parts of my body.'' I would not have realized how hard I was squeezing Alexander's hand subconsciously had my gaze not fallen on our intertwined hands.

I apologize instantly to Alexander trying to free my hand from his grasp but he holds on to it tightly. ''He tore my nightdress off and tied a rope around my mouth when I continued to scream and resist."

As I kept saying the events of that particular night, the vivid memories flashed across my eyes and I trembled with fear. Alexander starts to slowly rub my back in circles trying to calm me down.

"He slapped me across my cheeks several times and forced his fingers in." I slowly whisper reliving my worst nightmare.

I feel arms instantly engulf me in a warm embrace. I sob on his shoulders for a long time before I gather up the courage to continue telling him the incident.

"Just when all- my hope was fading slowly like the flickering flame of a candle, someone- rang the doorbell from downstairs. I-I was never overjoyed to hear the doorbell ring in the middle of the night before."

"The next few parts I don't want to say but the person at the door was the one who rescued me that night. My parents flew back immediately the next day. I never found out how exactly my parents dealt with John but that night was the last time I ever saw him.'' I sigh releasing a breath. I try to get away, not wanting to cry in front of him but unable to prevent the tears that were starting to form.

"Was Ricky the one who found you?''

More sobs break out as I nod my head in response. "I wouldn't have been this hurt if he just slapped me or something. His betrayal hurts the most,'' I begin to cry harder as I am no longer able to deny what I knew deep down - that things will never be the same.

I kept crying until I was too tired to cry more and drifted into a vision, reliving the wonderful moments I spent with Ricky.

Alexander did not ask me anything after. He simply held me tightly as I continued to sob for a long time staining his white shirt with my tears. I slowly feel him kiss the top of my head reassuringly and I suddenly feel conscious for bawling my eyes out in front of a stranger.

Alexander loosens his hold on me and I feel my breath hitch just as I tilt my head upwards to meet his gaze. My eyes widen in recognition and my lips part in astonishment as I stare back at warm brown ones with specks of gold on them.

No, this can't be. It can't be him.

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~XOXO

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