Waking up to the sweet smell of coffee and bacon sizzling on the skillet was definitely not an experience I was used to. Light music from the radio permeated my ears as well as some light tapping on wooden flooring. Pushing myself up from the made up floor bed, I glanced my sleepy eyes to the kitchen door taking in the view of a man I had not seen in a while, singing along to himself as he cooked. 

"(Y/N), you're finally awake! It's almost 1pm you know."

I stared at him in disbelief. I hadn't seen Suga since maybe just after his graduation last year. His long shaggy grey hair was tussled in it's usual style, he was still much taller than me and his etching smile was the one I had always known. Despite all that, he somehow looked older, more mature. More manly. I watched him place some dishes down on a table he had set up in front of my sleeping area. It was filled with breads and rice and some meat.

"What a nice surprise, I haven't seen you in a while, Suga," I said rubbing my eyes. 

"I know, graduation, right? It's been a long time. I just moved in with Daichi last month." He sat down with two pairs of chopsticks, handing me one across the table which I gladly accepted and began to dig in. I never knew anything about him moving in with Daichi. I really didn't know much about either of them these days. They could've changed names and got married for all I knew. I was so out of the loop I wasn't even sure I could fit in anymore. I was too different from the way I used to be. 

"Oh, yeah? Why's that?" I pondered. Why would he have moved in during the middle of the schooling year? 

"Ah, well, you see...I was seeing someone for a while but things didn't work out great. She stayed pretty close to my university so I was staying with her for the first part of the year but...yeah," he trailed off. Suga, actually dating someone? Why did the thought make my heart pound a little?

"Funnily enough, that's why (Y/N) is here also," Daichi stated, making his way into the living room, "How are you feeling, sis?" he asked, sitting down at the table with to eat lunch.

"Yeah...definitely better than last night, thanks."

"Are you going to be staying here too, (Y/N)?" Suga asked excitedly.

"I...don't know yet. It's all a bit hazy just now," I said whilst looking at the floor. 

"I told you last night, you don't have to worry about a thing anymore, okay? We've got your back now," smiled Daichi, placing a hand on my shoulder. I tried sending back the best smile I could muster through a mouthful of lunch, but I'm more than certain he saw right through it. 

"You best believe it, (Y/N)," added Suga, slurping on his juice. 

"Thanks guys, I appreciate that a lot. However, I will need to go back at some point, I don't have any of my things here."

"We'll take you, (Y/N), you don't have to worry about a thing. In fact, we should probably go now and get it out of the way."

It was true that that would've probably been the best course of action, but my anxieties began to grow, thinking of all the what if's. "What if he's in there, though?" my voice barely audible. 

"He won't be, trust me." I didn't really know what Daichi meant by that, but at the same time, I didn't want to either.

---

"You realise you're being ridiculous right?!" I screamed at him.

"Ridiculous? Is it ridiculous to think that you might actually be the slut that everyone thinks you are?"

"I'm so done with this right now."

"No, you fucking bitch. I'm the one that's done with you."

Crying, pushing, shoving. 

"Why do you insist on hurting me so badly? I've not done a thing to you."

"You drive me fucking INSANE! That's what you do to me. You fuck me around, piss me off and you're a stupid bitch ALL the time!"

Scratching, biting, hitting.

"Do you even hear yourself?! I've done nothing to you and you know it! You're always looking for an excuse to let out your anger on me!"

"And you deserve it! Who the fuck do you think you are, constantly texting guys behind my back, basically cheating on me!" He picked up the nearest object which happened to be my glass vase my mother had bought me and threw it directly above my head, the small glittering shards falling down like snow, etching a red streak across my cheek. I stared up at him, realising I was slowly backing down the wall in our kitchen. He looked so scary, all the time. I would only ever feel fear in the pit of my stomach whilst looking at him. 

"I haven't text any guys behind your back," I whispered

"I can't fucking hear you," he stomped closer to me, my knees hugged in tight to my chest.

"I emailed Tanaka. One time. I just wanted to know how the club was coming along, that's all. He was my best friend in school, you know...when you would actually LET me go to school."

"It's not like you miss that shit hole anyways. He was always sniffing around you like a fucking dog. I knew I never trusted you or him."

"Well, I don't know how that works considering nothing has ever happened," I said quietly, mostly to myself but it was loud enough for him to hear it. It was also loud enough for him to deem appropriate to respond with a punch right to the jaw. 

I whimpered in deep pain, like a kicked dog. I suddenly became completely aware of my surroundings, like my eyes were HD but also tunnel-vision. He's going to kill me if I don't leave right now. I looked to the left, where I saw our broomstick, and to the right was the locked front door. He was drunk enough that if I hit him hard enough, he would stumble back and I'd have the time to reach the door, unlock it and make a break for it. 

That's exactly what I tried to do. However, as soon as I swung the stick, he caught it easily with one hand and stared down deep into my soul.

"You'll fucking pay for that."

I didn't know what else to do, so I opted for pushing him as hard as I could. Luckily, he fell back hard and hit his head. It looked like he was knocked out, but I didn't stay for long enough to check. I sprinted for the front door and fumbled tremendously with the keys to unlock it. As soon as I did, I bolted. I didn't even know where I was going until I ended up at Daichi's apartment.

---

Daichi, Suga and I had begun making our way to my old apartment. Not much was said, Suga just quietly whistled along the pavement, the noise of a car engine passing by every few minutes was the only interruption. I wasn't really sure what to say as all I could think about was how nervous I felt. What if he's there? What if I have to talk to him? Would he still try and hurt me even if Daichi and Suga were here? Does he really hate me that much? They both seemed to sense the anguish I was in and tried to make the air a bit lighter for me. 

"(Y/N), did you hear that the volleyball club has made it to nationals again this year?!" Suga asked excitedly. 

"I...did not. I've been really out of the loop lately," I laughed, trying to cover up my sadness about not even being able to congratulate my friends. "That's so amazing for them. I'm so proud of those boys."

"Me too," smiled Daichi, "I'm just sad we can't play officially with them anymore. I'd love to be able to go back to nationals."

"I know, right? I'd love a chance to play with the guys again, even if it was just for fun."

"I'd love to come and watch," I smiled. Being with the boys made me feel really happy as they were all so carefree and fun to be around. "Can we go watch them at nationals this year?"

"Absolutely, (Y/N), I'll be booking front row seats for us," laughed Suga. His smile is so endearing.

Before I knew it, we had arrived at the door of my old home. I took my keys out of my pocket and jangled them in the door, the lock was always pretty broken. Before opening up though, I took a deep, long breath in. I felt a hand on my shoulder and eyes begging to meet my own.

"We've got your back, remember?" said Suga.

"Yeah, of course," I opened the door and hesitantly made my way inside. 

The shattered glass and blood stains still remained on the floor from last night. I thought I might cry at the sight, but I didn't want to make things awkward for Daichi and Suga. Navigating my way to the bedroom, I passed by empty beer bottles, ciggarette butts and food wrappers scattered across the floor. 

"Sorry, it's pretty messy in here," I said sheepishly to the boys.

"You really don't have to be sorry," said Suga, "We understand." His face was full of empathy but his voice was completely dark. It was a little scary. I could see him eyeing the broken glass but thankfully, he never said a word. Daichi looked mad the whole time and also remained silent.

"I'm just gonna pack up some clothes and my computer things and I'll be done." I rushed to the task, desperately wanting to be out of the suffocating environment. 

"You good?" asked Daichi after a while of me moving around and sloppily throwing things into my rucksack.

"Yeah, I should be now. Let's get going." 

The walk home wasn't silent this time. It wasn't nerve-wracking either. It kind of felt like the boulder I had been carrying on my back was being lifted up. The sky looked a little brighter, the roads a little quieter  and the air was crisper. Maybe things wouldn't be so bad after all. 

We arrived back at Daichi's place within about 10 minutes, he plopped down on the sofa and began to flick through the channels. He looked annoyed but I really didn't want to question it, as I was certain it was because I was getting in his way. Suga stood behind me in the doorway. 

"I'm just going to organise this stuff in the spare room, if that's okay?" I truly felt like I was completely invading my brother's private space. 

"Yeah no problem, make sure you make yourself comfortable, kay?" I couldn't detect any contempt in his voice, but at the same time I still knew something was up with him. I guess it wasn't easy to see me like this. 

I nodded and walked down the hall to the room, noticing Suga was following me. I turned round to face him, "What's up?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were okay, and to check if you needed any help with anything."

"I think I'm good, thanks for asking though. Your help really meant a lot to me today, Suga."

"I'll always be here. You know that."

I smiled at him, nodding in agreement, "Same for you."

"I know you've been through a lot these past few days, so I was wondering if you wanted to chill with Daichi and I in the living room with a take out and some movies?"

I couldn't help but feel like I was going to cry. The overwhelming amount of support I'd received had nearly knocked me on my back approximately eight times in the one day. Every time Suga looked at me, smiled at me or was even in my presence I felt nervous, but not in the same way he made me feel nervous. It was like I felt...excitement.

"I'd love to."

"Great, I'll go set everything up whilst you get settled, m'kay?"

I nodded and watched him leave my doorway. I began unpacking my things that I had grabbed earlier and placed them neatly inside the half empty wardrobe in the spare room, the only other things cluttering inside being a Christmas tree box and what looked like a broken vacuum. Daichi's apartment was pretty spacious for the most part, but this room was like a little box. Not that I wasn't appreciative, it just made me think back to the way things used to be; when we still both lived with our parents, studying together on the kitchen table, going into each others rooms and annoying each other for no reason. Things were definitely different now, but I was glad that he was still a constant in my life. 

I had mostly finished unpacking my things and made my way to the living room where Suga and Daichi sat, with an abundance of snacks and blankets at their disposal, the Star Wars theme playing sombrely in the background. 

"A Star Wars marathon, (Y/N), since I know it's your favourite!" said Daichi.

"You know me too well," I plopped down in the middle of the two boys on the couch. 

We had only made it halfway through The Attack of The Clones before Daichi was snoozing on the couch. Suga had a good laugh at him and made sure to snap some pictures of us with him lying in the back passed out. We still continued watching to the end of the film. 

"You wanna watch Revenge of The Sith or is this getting a bit too much now?" Suga asked, smirking at me. 

"Yeah, I think I'll pass. There's only so much Anakin I can handle for one night before I overheat," I joked

"I knew you'd have a crush on him," Suga said teasingly.

"How's that?"

"Cause you always go for the bad boy."

I blushed furiously, "That's not true, Suga! I go for the underdog! I don't even like him in Revenge of the Sith anyways!" I was practically shouting at this point whilst he laughed like a maniac. 

"Shut up!" said Daichi, half sleeping, half ready to kill us. He quickly shot his head back down to his pillow. Suga and I both looked at each other and giggled. 

"I should really get to bed now," I said, "It's been a super rough day."

"Yeah, I know. I'm always here you know, if you wanna talk about anything that happened with him," he sounded kind of concerned, an emotion he hadn't really elicited since seeing him. Concern wasn't usually one of Suga's fronts, he would always try and lighten a situation, afraid to ever say the wrong thing. But this seemed different. 

"I don't ever wanna think about him again," I said quietly. 

"Well, I'm gonna do everything I can in my power to make you forget about him. I swear."

In that moment, he looked so sincere that it almost made me want to cry. 

"If anyone can do that, I think it'd be you, Suga."