14 January 1928 

This was the day he found another reason not to celebrate his birthday. Just 19 years ago he had taken an oath not to celebrate this day. But 10 years ago she came into his sorrow laden life lightning it up with the candles of happiness. But he killed her soul today.         

He killed her soul with a single word, a word that echoed in his mind like a gunshot. A word that shattered their dreams and hopes, a word that broke her heart and spirit. A word that he wished he could take back, but it was too late. He had said it, and he couldn't unsay it. He had said "divorce". His intentions were noble but he wanted her to relieve her out of this traumatizing relationship but only now he knew that has been unconsciously abusing her body for the past few months. The  way he came to know the grappling truth is a groping story that you would like to hear another day.

He didn't mean it, of course. He loved her more than anything in the world. He loved her more than himself. He loved her more than life. But he was angry, and hurt, and scared. He was angry at the world for taking away his father.  He was scared of losing her, of being alone, of facing his demons. He was a mess, and he needed help. But he didn't ask for it, he didn't accept it, he didn't want it. He pushed her away, he pushed everyone away. He isolated himself, he drowned himself in work, he numbed himself with alcohol. He was a ticking time bomb, and he exploded.

He exploded on the day of  his birthday, the day that was supposed to be a celebration of their love, their bond, their commitment. The day that was supposed to be a reminder of their vows, their promises, their future. The day that was supposed to be a happy day, a special day, a beautiful day. But it wasn't. It was a horrible day, a terrible day, a dreadful day. It was the day that he ruined everything, the day that he lost everything, the day that he regretted everything.

He regretted the way he treated her, the way he ignored her, the way he hurt her. He regretted the things he said, the things he did, the things he didn't do. He regretted the way he wasted their time, their energy, their love. He regretted the way he let his past, his pain, his fear control him. He regretted the way he let his pride, his ego, his anger blind him. He regretted the way he let his weakness, his cowardice, his selfishness destroy him.

He destroyed himself, and he destroyed her. He destroyed the one person who loved him unconditionally, who supported him endlessly, who understood him completely. He destroyed the one person who gave him hope, who gave him joy, who gave him life. He destroyed the one person who was his soulmate, his partner, his best friend. He destroyed the one person who was his everything.

He destroyed her with a single word, a word that he would never forget, a word that he would never forgive, a word that he would never live down. 

This  was also the day  his younger brother Batuknath was born and also the day he lost his mother to post partum Hemorrhage. Once Just hours after this day clicked in that day he saw his mother lie lifelessly with blood covering her up. Today he saw his wife lying lifelessly in the same condition.

The events of the dawn haunted him merrily and he could not take it anymore. He took a glass of the crimson red fluid which he slowly gulped into his mouth. As the strong gusty winds of Kal Baisakhi was blowing with all their might. They took down a letter from late Shubhra's diary which fled into the tear laden Anirudh's face. He quickly picked it up and started reading it up

It was not just any letter, the last letter of a mother to her son. It was a letter of love and regret, of hope and despair, of forgiveness and farewell. She wrote it with trembling hands and tearful eyes, knowing that she would never see him again. She wrote it to tell him how proud she was of him, how much she missed him, how sorry she was for the mistakes she made by taking up her third pregnancy even though she knew she might also have to bid her two elder sons a good bye. She wrote it to ask him to take care of his brother, to be strong and brave, to live a good and happy life. She wrote it to say goodbye.

 13 January 1909

11:45 pm

My dearest Kopal ,

This is the hardest letter I have ever written in my life. I wish I could tear it up and forget it, but I can't. I have to face the truth and tell you how I feel. I don't think I might be alive when you read this.

Reading this Anirudh's eyes tear up and he feels immense sorrow engulfing him. Only now he knew that his mother always knew that she might die at 21 giving birth to her son, that was the power of motherhood. He continued reading the letter.

Never abuse your wife, who  will also be the mother of your children. Knowingly or Unknowingly never hurt the woman who gave you her heart and soul and betray the woman who stood by your side through thick and thin. Never inflict pain and suffering on the woman who bore you  children. Never stain your soul, son and  darken it with your wicked and hateful deeds and corrupt it with your lies and deceit and endanger your family, who is also your flesh and blood.

 Always remember my Kopal hate never yields love, only love can flourish love. Hate breaks bonds and love repairs bonds. Always remember when you get married always pay attention to your wife, compliment her and you should always stand up for her even its me your mother who is against her . I hope you will never disappoint me.

 Remember I might die tomorrow but You were born on the auspicious day of Bhogi, when people burn old and conservative mindset making new way for morals. Fill everyone with more good morals like I taught you. Abusing your future wife is letting me down in the worst possible way. Never ignore the values and morals that I taught you. Keep in your mind to never reject the love and respect that I showed you and she is going to show you . By any means if you hurt her mentally or physical remember meri Kopal, you did not fail yourself as a Husband , You failed me as a Mother.

This might be the last letter that I will ever write to you, son or the last time that I have the opportunity to call you my son, meri Kopal and last time that I might speak to you. But always move on with life and never cry if I die. I can't see you crying meri heera jaise beta.

Goodbye

Shubhra

Your mother.

Anirudh could not take it anymore.He took the letter and started crying. But he could not He did not just fail himself as husband but he failed his late mother.Even she would hate him now.But reading his mother 's  letter gave him an insight about how much he has to change. He quickly took the divorce papers he had gotten and quickly destroyed it before Bondita agrees to sign them.He closed his eyes and took an oath to restore things back to their place. Well the new dawn had something new, Ani would be able to call his own kith and kin.