Unplanned days off were a novelty in Muaz's life. He had gotten used to the strict routine but the joy of returning home was still as it had been all those years back.

But this time around, the familiar homecoming didn't have its usual outcome. His brows were scrunched in deep thoughts as he poured himself the tea. His eyes wandered outside the kitchen window.

Morning serenity was his favorite thing about his hometown. Murree's trademark chaos would take a breather with the emergence of the dawn. The Dak Bangla was cut off from the main road but that didn't mean they were completely immune to the tourist upsurge.

Muaz took the first sip of his morning fuel when his phone rang on the counter. His eyes immediately zeroed in on the caller ID. As expected. He smiled and wasted no time in picking up the call.

"Hey."

He greeted softly, making himself comfortable on the coffee table.

Unaiza stopped her quest for the matching Dupatta with her outfit and stood leaning against her cupboard.

"Hey! How's everything? I wanted to call last night but then I didn't. Thought you must be busy."

Muaz nodded, sipping the warm concoction. "Last night was happening for sure. Abu was livid and me and Ammi had to make him understand the gravity of the situation."

"And what about Sila? How's she?" Unaiza asked. The worry in her tone didn't surprise Muaz. Rameen's family had always treated Sila as one of their own, just as even he and Ammi knew of Rameen. Best friends things.

"She's getting the needed rest."

"She deserves that and more. Rameen was worried sick. Right now, she and the girls are on their way to Murree along with Mrs. Wadia."

"That's great, actually. Sila needs her friends more than anything even if she doesn't realize it herself. Her support system isn't around and honestly, Ammi and I are not doing the best job out there."

Unaiza tsked, her disagreement reaching him loud and clear. "Come on. You've been a good brother, Muaz. Give yourself that. You found her and took her home."

"But we weren't her first option when she left Karachi and that's going to sting for a while."

He hadn't voiced it to anyone but Sila not trusting them when she needed emotional and physical support had pained him immensely. He had scolded her for her carelessness but that rebuking was laced with his hurt. Yes, Abu was out of the question for obvious reasons but she could've called him or Ammi. They would've left everything and come for her, as they had done.

"We don't know under what circumstances she left, Muaz. Heartache is a vicious thing. I had only known Sila and Aahil through Reen but that alone was enough for me to think that they were solid. She always talked of them as if they were the missing pieces of each others' lives that fit together perfectly. Something must've happened. Something that made her leave everything and shut the whole world out."

And the prospect of that worried Muaz to no end. Unaiza had heard of them but Muaz had seen his sister accepting and being accepted in this relationship. Aahil and his family cherished Sila. Muaz and Ammi were pretty surprised yet immensely happy that a marriage that was nothing but a choice had become such a beautiful reality.

Then all this happened. Sila's disappearance. Faran's call to know if she'd come to Murree. Aahil's accident which Sila had got to know was a minor one. Sila's silence had a language of its own. Muaz had seen her this distraught only when she had lost her parents.

That terrified him.

How could all of this go so wrong?

More importantly, what had gone wrong?

That was the question Sila had yet to answer. Not that they had posed it. Not yet. Sila would get the time she needed to come to terms with her reality. She wouldn't be pushed for anything. That was for sure.

They had time and again called themselves her family, so it was time to act like one.

"Your silence is a sign that you're reevaluating your words."

The surety made Muaz smile. "Yeah, you got me."

"That's what I thought. Don't be too harsh on yourself. You need that energy to be the rock Sila needs to lean on."

"I will keep that in mind. By the way, aren't you getting late for your 8 AM lecture?"

Unaiza gave herself an appraising look into the mirror. "It's Thursday. I don't have 8 AM lectures on Thursdays."

"Yeah, you only have those on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Slipped my mind."

Unaiza's smile vanished. Muaz's stayed. Her heart skipped a beat. His continued its rhythm.

He waited for her to say something. It wasn't unheard of, to memorize the schedule of the person you talk to almost daily.

"I'm hanging up, now. I need to take my morning tea."

"I'm having mine." He made a point to tell her.

Unaiza chuckled. "Good for you. At least poor Luqman is spared from your constant complaints."

It was Muaz's turn this time around. His heart skipped a beat. It wasn't also unheard of, to know the quirks of the person you talk to almost daily. Those who knew him also knew he was no fan of his cook's cooking, pun intended.

"Bye, Muaz."

Unaiza mumbled.

"Bye, Unaiza. I'll talk to you later."

Saying that, he ended the call. Not that he'd need her affirmation. They'd talk later. They had been doing that a lot for quite a while now.

Back in her room, Unaiza left the cupboard and opened its flap. Muaz's diary was tucked between her old books.

This was where it all had started. And the funny thing was, the diary was still with her.

But did she want to return it now?

Debatable.

𝄞

This was the first morning in so many years where she had nothing on her mind when she woke up. The sleep was a sorry excuse for rest. She had tossed and turned for the majority of the night.

She wanted to erase her memory but at the same time, she needed to remember everything. She had to evaluate her current predicament. But she felt inept to do that.

Never in her life had she felt so lost. And that broke her heart once again. Heart, that was already covered with cracks and gashes.

She sat on the edge of the bed, playing with her fingers when she heard the faint knocking at the door.

"Sila?"

Naheed appeared there with the tray of breakfast in her hand. Sila shook her head. "Ammi, not again. You don't have to coddle me this way."

Naheed dismissed her. "Taking care of my child isn't coddling."

She placed the tray on the table as she did last night and beckoned Sila to join her. Sila did so wordlessly.

"Dinbanu called me last night. According to their plan, they will be here in half an hour."

Sila nodded, already aware of it. Amal hadn't shared the details with her but Haleh did send her a text about their flight schedule.

"Achi baat hai. You need them close. Always a package deal, you girls." Naheed smiled fondly. "Hurry up, you. After breakfast, I have to make sure we are ready to host our guests. Billu is nowhere to be found. Typical."

Sila swallowed the morsel. She knew what Naheed was trying to do. A little bit of normalcy in a situation that was anything but normal.

"What do you think? Will they stay over? I hope they do. It's been a long time since I've met the girls and Dinbanu and—"

"Ammi."

Sila's curt tone made her silent immediately. She gave Naheed a knowing look. "Once everyone is here, I need to talk to you all."

Naheed's face fell. But she got over it instantly and nodded, patting Sila's hair. No matter what it was, she would be Sila's support. As she'd decided. As she was expected to.

Sila ate her breakfast half-heartedly. She had run away from her reality for too long. Putting up pretenses that everything was fine. Where had it brought her? To the absolute pit of nothing.

She wouldn't do that anymore.

She mustered up her courage when her phone lit up with the incoming call. She glanced at it.

Adan Calling.

Sila stilled, once again. This wasn't the first call she'd gotten. It wasn't going to be the last.

But she felt as unprepared for it as ever. What would she tell Adan? Or Nawar? Or Faran. All of whom had been trying to reach out to her.

Should she play the dutiful wife once again and lie to them about their brother's mess-up? Or should she tell them the tale of his stupidity and cruelty without missing any detail?

Once again, she was uncertain.

But for how long?

She'd have to make a choice.

When he certainly had. It was a choice to push her away. A deliberate one. To break her heart. To reduce their relationship to...this.

The responsibility wasn't hers alone to shoulder.

And she refused to be crushed by its burden anymore.

𝄞

The last time they'd visited Murree was for Ammi's birthday a few years back. Sila was reluctant to go but they had none of it and pulled her along.

One of the best weekends of their lives. They promised Ammi that they'd be back soon but in the chaos of life, they couldn't keep their word.

But now, here they were. Right outside Dak Bangla, and the one who had the most reservations regarding visiting this place, was going to be one of their hosts.

It was ironic at best.

They had just gotten out of the car when the front door opened. They immediately looked up.

Sila stood there, by the railing.

Rameen sighed with relief. Haleh smiled a teary smile. Amal glared at her.

That was about right.

Rameen was the first one to reach her side. She held her by her shoulder. "You do this again and I swear I will not be as forgiving as I am right now."

She'd be. There were no two ways about it. Without waiting for her reply, Rameen hugged her tightly.

She needed this more than she'd realized. Sila concluded as she held her best friend close.

"Reen! Move!"

Haleh hissed and when Rameen did no such thing, pushed her aside.

"Sila! This was not done! You idiot!"

Haleh exclaimed through the hug. Sila didn't do anything to contradict her.

It was Amal's turn. She lacked Rameen and Haleh's enthusiasm.

"I can't decide if I should kick you or shake the hell out of you."

Sila's nose stung with tears. "I think you should also hug me."

Amal looked away, mostly to hide her tears. Futile thing to do. "Yeah, that'll be better." Amal drawled but wasted no time in doing as she was told.

Her support system. This was what she was missing out on. She'd naively assumed she'd be better off alone. A grave miscalculation.

Sila found Mrs. Wadia at some distance, looking at them with a fond smile.

"Banu Auntie."

But the slight shake of Dinbanu's head and she swallowed whatever excuse or explanation was on her tongue.

She wanted to burst into tears right there.

Haleh was right. She was indeed an idiot. Who had looked for unflinching love in a place she couldn't find when it was with her all along. In the form of her family. Her people.

It was the one thing she couldn't blame Aahil for. It was on her.

𝄞

Amal traced the surface of the mantelpiece absentmindedly. The contours of the stone were oddly pleasant to touch. So was the interior of the room. It had been updated from what they had seen the last time they were here.

But these trivial things weren't important. That'd be Sila's silence she refused to break. Amal took a sharp intake of breath.

"My question wasn't so hard, Sila."

Rameen glared at her but Amal just shrugged. "Why Islamabad? When you don't even know anyone in that city! Your whole life is in Karachi! Us, your in-laws, your acquaintances, and even the resting place of your parents. Then why did you go to Islamabad without telling anyone?"

She deliberately hadn't mentioned her husband. Sila was too preoccupied to notice the omittance.

Amal waited patiently. So did Rameen and Haleh. Sila finally looked up.

"You are right. My whole life is in Karachi. You guys, my parents, my in-laws, university friends, coworkers, acquaintances. Him..."

She paused. Her glassy eyes fought a lost battle to push back her tears.

"But so are heartache and hurt. So much."

She gave them a waning smile. Or tried to. "I guess I wanted to go somewhere where both of these things didn't exist. Where I had never seen any pain. Never knew any heartache. Only Islamabad came to my mind and I just had to leave. I couldn't stay...not after..."

She took a shuddering breath. Rameen and Haleh shared an alarmed look.

Amal crouched down before her. "Sila—"

But Sila shook her head, not attempting to wipe her tears.

"He didn't do right by me, Amal. He didn't."

It all came back to her. His aloofness. His frustration. How done he was with their relationship. With her. His scathing words. Words that were burned into her soul.

She looked at her friends helplessly as if they'd know how to make it alright.

"Sila, talk to us." Rameen prompted her, holding her hand.

"Exactly! Tell us what happened. You're scaring me." Haleh exclaimed, all the while caressing her head.

Sila wiped her tears harshly.

"It's over, guys."

"Don't say that."

Rameen stopped her but Sila didn't let her. "It's over. Finished. Do you hear me? Everything between us is over!"

Tears ran down her cheeks profusely. Before her, the girl sat in perplexed silence. They knew Sila's side of the tale would be painful but they hadn't imagined her to be this hopeless about everything.

"Sila," Haleh began, only to be cut off by Sila with a shake of her head.

"Don't. Don't think it can't be that bad. I've already made that mistake."

That intensified Haleh's worry. She looked at Rameen and Amal helplessly. Sila saw the exchange and continued. Her voice shook with the extent of her heartache.

"I thought I had this figured. Naive. Foolish of me. It was salvageable, I'd say to myself. We'd work through everything. And then I'll tell him this was not done. He'll listen to me. He always has. And then we'll be over it. It'll be just a bump on the road that made us stronger. That's what I told myself. Repeatedly."

She chuckled humorlessly. "I never considered the possibility that it'll become the doom I never saw coming."

She fiddled with her fingers. Her countenance screamed exhaustion and defeat. Two things her friends had seldom seen her expressing. This wasn't how Sila dealt with her life ordeals.

"You know what? All I have toward myself is pity. And that's such a pathetic thing to feel for yourself."

She closed her eyes regretfully and gnawed on her lip to stifle her sobs.

"I'm still trying to figure out where I went wrong. I did everything in my power to prevent this. I didn't say a word to you all. Pretended that everything was fine in front of the family. When he was wallowing in his past, I was fighting for our relationship and what hurts me the most is the fight was with him."

Hurt, frustrated, and angry—she knew she made a pathetic picture, the one her friends must have a hard time believing was her but she couldn't put up with the pretenses anymore. She was not fine. And she refused to be silent about it.

"I know our past shapes our life but you have to take a step back when it's ruining your present. Was it wrong of me to expect him to do the same? I never asked for any reason. I just wanted him to let me in so I could help him and save our relationship. I was trying to prevent what he was hell-bent to destroy. And he had no fucking idea! So lost was he in his past that he didn't even realize he was smashing our present gloriously. Idiot!"

She scrunched her face as if it physically hurt her to talk about this.

"I knew what this marriage was from the very first day. If that clusterfuck hadn't happened, our life trajectories would have panned out very differently and who knows, we wouldn't even be in each others' lives. But that's not how it happened. We didn't have much of a choice."

She stared at her ring. For a long time.

"But we made the most of a situation both of us were unprepared for. Was it me who went ahead and said that the piece of paper we signed wasn't just a formality? That we were it for each other? Each other's family. No! It was him! And still, he had the gall to imply that our marriage was just a means to an end. He made me hope and then snatched it away in the cruelest way possible. And for that, I'll never forgive him."

There was unbreakable silence in the room for several minutes. They waited for Sila to say more without prompting her to. God knows how long it had been since she had the chance to let it all out. They weren't here to pass their judgment. They were here to give support to Sila and that's exactly what they were doing.

"All my fault." She whispered, her voice echoed in the silent room. "He said it was all my fault. The campaign on social media, Maya's character assassination, whatever Zarrar did."

"Zarrar?" Amal asked, confused.

"Zarrar Hassan?" Rameen confirmed. Sila nodded in affirmation.

"How is he related to all this? And who's this Maya, exactly?" Haleh posed the most important questions.

Sila shrugged. "He says he and Aahil were once best friends. Two people with a shared love for music."

They looked on stupefied. Sila continued. "And Maya is Aahil's ex-girlfriend. Zarrar's words. And he's not a reliable narrator. I don't believe him. But the irony is, the one I'll believe every word of has refused to give me a dot. So where do I go from here?"

There was a resignation to her stance that hurt them more than they'd ever let on. She had accepted her fate. She had accepted that Aahil would give her nothing. No expectations.

How badly her hopes were crushed that all the fight had left her?

"It looks bad, isn't it?"

Their silence was the most appropriate answer.

"I can't recognize myself. Does love do that to a person? What a glorified emotion. We shouldn't take it too seriously. The naysayers are right. We shouldn't bloody care. At least he didn't."

Rameen's eyes widened. A gasp left Haleh's lips. Amal's face flashed with anger.

Sila nodded slightly, without meeting their eye. It was embarrassing. "I don't bloody care, Sila. That's what he told me. When I was holding on to the scraps. When I said this to him in desperation. My life's beautiful truth, that I had tucked safely in the safest corner of my heart. I used it as a weapon to make him see sense. And guess what? He won. He broke it without breaking a sweat."

She couldn't do it anymore. She hated herself in that moment and that, in itself was a tragedy.

She'd never hated herself.

But love made her do it.

That was her breaking point. And she was glad there were arms to hold her when she broke into pieces right there.

She let the tears flow, and the sobs to break free as if she was mourning a death.

All the same.

𝄞

Amal, Rameen, and Haleh didn't stop her from crying her heart out. She hadn't expected them to. They didn't give her false affirmations either. What that would do?

But for her own sake, Sila gathered herself. The fog hadn't entirely shifted. The uncertainty still loomed overhead.

But at least, she had her support system close. That was a ray of hope in this gloomy and grey weather.

She looked around, tucking her hair behind her ears. "Coming here was never my decision. It's something that just happened. Surprisingly, it went better than I had expected. Small mercies in life, I guess."

She looked down in her lap. The question hung there in the air louder than her sobs were a while back.

What now?

"Sila..."

Rameen started but stopped, not knowing what to say. Sila took a deep breath.

"Don't ask me what now, Reen. I have no idea."

Rameen pursed her lips. Her reluctance was for some other reasons too but Sila didn't know that.

"I need time. A shit load of it, if I'm being honest. The pain is too new. Too raw. It will take me some time to recover and evaluate everything. But..."

She willed the courage to go through this.

"I don't want to go back to Karachi anytime soon. And I don't want to face...him even if my life depends on it. Not after what he did to me. Not after what became of us."

She bunched her fists. Yeah, it hurt. But it was still better than what he had dished out to her.

"I know sooner or later I'll have to make a decision. I will do that but for now, I want to keep my distance. I deserve better than a man who refuses to sort out his past. I don't deserve to be on the receiving end of his scathing words while trying to do both our parts to save this relationship. I'm done. I've given everything to our marriage. There's nothing more I can do. I'm tired and I need space."

The finality in her voice scared her. But it gave her the strength as well. This was not desired but it was needed.

She had to choose herself because who else would?

Her friends would side with her. She was sure of it. She expected nothing less from them.

Their uncertainty said otherwise.

Sila's resolve faltered. But before it could shake anymore, Amal shifted closer and hugged her.

"You'll find us by your side, Sila. No questions asked."

Rameen and Haleh followed suit. Sila was grateful for this support. She had, once again realized how important it was to always have people you can rely on. People whose support came to you unconditionally.

She closed her eyes.

All her gratitude aside, a tiny part of her wished it hadn't come to this.

It shouldn't have come to this.

Damn you, Aahil Jahangir.

𝄞

Sila's footsteps faded as she descended the stairs. She had easily bought their excuse of getting freshened up. In the meanwhile, she went to spend some time with Mrs. Wadia.

Rameen left the doorknob. Her heart was already sinking. They had every intention of letting Sila know what had happened after she left but...

Haleh was in the same dilemma. She sat on the edge of the bed perplexed.

Amal paced the length of the room. Her body language lacked the anxiousness they felt. She was, as usual, filled with rage.

"Fucking Bastard."

She seethed. Haleh and Rameen weren't shocked by her outburst but they had to remind her she couldn't do that with Sila just downstairs.

"Amal! Keep it down!"

"The hell I will. Have you seen her? She's never been this distraught, Reen. She's literally losing herself. How many setbacks she's faced in life? But never had she ever looked this done with everything. He's broken her beyond repair."

That was the truth. More than a decade-long friendship, so many life changes, setbacks, and heartache but never did Sila lose it the way she had just a while back.

"We were gravely mistaken to think it was workable. The bastard and his friends knew he had been horrible to Sila. Obviously, his ability to be a messed-up fuck isn't new to them."

"What should we do now?" Haleh asked helplessly. She wasn't any less shocked by Sila's side of the events. But Aahil's unresponsive form on the hospital bed swirled before her eyes.

"You know what? He's survived, hasn't he? Zinda hai. So, let him do the hard work as his friends are so certain he would."

"For heaven's sake! It's about Sila too. Think of her. She has a right to know. We have no authority to take it away from her."

Rameen said, tired of Amal's angry outburst.

"Exactly, Amal. It's up to her if she wants to go or not."

Amal glared at her. "Don't be a fool on purpose, Haleh. Did you not see her just yet? She's madly in love with the man. The moment she comes to know, she'll fly to reach him. And sorry but I don't want that ease for him. Not after what I have just witnessed."

"He doesn't want that ease for himself, either." Rameen muttered more to herself.

"Good call." Amal drawled.

Haleh ran a hand through her hair. "I don't know, Amal. It's a huge risk we're taking. I don't want Sila to be cross with us."

"And I don't want her hurt yet again, Haleh." Amal said, pain lacing her voice. "Whatever I've got to know about Aahil's problems, it screams destruction. Mahad and Osama said the same. It's not the first time he's ruined himself. I wouldn't want Sila close to him unless he's sorted out his past for good. He's hurt her immensely once, he can do that again. I don't trust him with Sila anymore."

That stung. But it was the truth. Aahil had let them down. And more than anyone, he had let Sila down. Was it fair to her to go back to him without any effort from his side to win her over?

If he wasn't treating his accident as a boon, determined to right every wrong he'd caused, then who were they to get in between that?

It was, at the end of the day, for their Sila. She deserved this and more from the man she was irrevocably in love with but had gotten hurt by the most.

Rameen looked at Amal and Haleh. The silent conversation they were pretty well-versed in. Without a word, they left the room, clicking the door behind.

Leaving the burden of Aahil's truth there.

It was a leap of faith.

They hoped Aahil wouldn't let them and Sila down this time.

But most importantly, he wouldn't let himself down. Not again.

𝄞

Sila intertwined her fingers, out of cold but mostly out of nervousness. She bunched her fists with the ends of her cardigan sleeves and braced her shoulders. She found the faces of Naheed and Dinbanu, as kind as ever. Her girls were there for her. Muaz gave her an encouraging smile. Abu leaned into his seat, keeping his newspaper aside.

"I'm sorry for keeping you on your toes. It was foolish. Careless, I know. Won't happen again. I promise."

She could see Naheed ready to tell her off. She gently shook her head. "It was rather stupid of me, Ammi. You can sit this one out."

Naheed grumbled under her breath. Sila sighed. The easy part was done.

"I...I'm going to stay here for a while, Ammi...and Abu." She blurted out.

Naheed's smile dimmed. Not at the prospect of her having her around. The implications were loud and clear.

"Aahil and I...we're having some problems. I don't know how long will it take me to evaluate everything. I can't say if I'm even ready for that. I'm all over the place. I don't want to talk about what happened. Not yet. I just need—"

"No need to talk about it."

Ikram's voice boomed in the living room. He hadn't raised his voice. His commanding tone was enough to convey that no further discussion was needed.

Naheed ignored it, as usual, ready to bombard Sila with questions. She was worried. It didn't take a genius to figure it out.

"But—"

"I think Abu's right, Ammi." Muaz held her by her shoulders. Mrs. Wadia got up from her seat and placed her hand on Sila's head.

"Take your time, child. You'll find us there for you. But please, it was the first and last disappearance act."

Sila nodded. "It was, Banu Auntie."

"It better be."

Amal said from her place. She wasn't glaring at her. Rameen and Haleh reached her side, their support as unflinching as ever. Muaz had calmed Naheed down to a great extent. Her brows were scrunched in an expression of worry but that didn't stop her from engulfing Sila in her motherly embrace. Muaz stood to the side, making sure she knew he was there for her, whenever she needed him to. Ikram hadn't said a word after but he hadn't gone back to his newspaper either.

She had all her people right there for her.

Still, the void in her seemed to eat her from within.

𝄞

Like every close-knit family, the Jahangirs had taken it upon themselves to make up for their carelessness. Sila hadn't been picking up their calls. That obviously showed her hurt. This needed prompt action from them.

It was decided that Faseeh, Sabah, and Faran would go to Murree and bring her home. Mrs. Irshad was bound by her weak health. Adan and Nawar had to stay back to take care of her and the kids.

The plan was in motion. They were hopeful that Sila would forgive them for the lapse. They were sure when she got to know their reasoning, she'd be more than willing to put it behind them.

But its opposition had come from somewhere they hadn't expected to.

Aahil had been shifted to his room. The precarity of his health had subsided. He had dodged the worst. No matter whether the road to recovery was long, the journey had begun and it would only get easier with time.

His speech was yet to get its normal fluency back and so did his other physical capabilities but one thing that he didn't need to voice out for his family to understand was his yearning for his wife.

Sabah, out of her motherly love, who couldn't see him distressing over this, had mentioned to him that they were going to bring Sila back home and soon she'd be where she belonged.

Instead of calming him, it had the opposite effect. It made him restless. Sabah hadn't expected this reaction out of him.

She called the doctor wondering all the while what had possibly gone wrong.

Turned out, everything had.

Faseeh ran a hand on his face agitatedly as he stared at Mahad and Osama. Beside him, Sabah sat silently, processing what they had told them. So were the rest of the Jahangirs.

"We should've seen this coming."

Mrs. Irshad sighed heavily. "It was not at all like Sila to leave the way she did."

Faseeh pinched the bridge of his nose. His family knew if Aahil wasn't bedridden, the scolding of his life awaited him this instant.

"And now he doesn't want us to bring her back or for her to know about his accident."

Mahad nodded. "Precisely."

Sabah placed her hand on his shoulder. "Faseeh, we don't know what exactly happened."

He raised an eyebrow at him. "Do we really not, Sabah? It's not our first time seeing this film."

His words were unkind but what else was expected out of him? His son had, once again, gone ahead and ruined his life. This time, both emotionally and physically. He had narrowly dodged death, for crying out loud. If that didn't scream disaster of the worst kind then what else did?

"How can he expect us to sit idle and do nothing?"

Mrs. Irshad was livid. "What else we elders are for then?"

Mahad got up and sat before her, taking her hands into his. "Dado, he will make it all right. Have some faith in him."

"And how does he plan to do that? Right now he's in no position to move even his body at his will."

Faseeh said to no one in particular. Sabah wiped her tears. Faran closed his eyes in regret. His father's anger made sense but the brother in him didn't want Aahil to be subjected to his crassness. Not like this.

Mrs. Irshad cupped Mahad's cheek. "My child, this isn't how it works. As your elders, we have a responsibility toward you. Aahil is bedridden and Sila is so far from home, from his and from us. We can't sit and watch it crashing down. We are already late. Let us sort this out for them. That's what families are for."

Mahad shared a worried look with Osama. Their sentiments were right but Aahil's family was going about it the same way they had dealt with Aahil's every mess-up. What they were unable to realize, this was different from all those times. The repercussions weren't for Aahil alone. They involved Sila as well.

She deserves this effort for him, not for his family to do his work, as they had already done so many times. That would give her a wrong idea about Aahil's intentions and his integrity.

Instead of solving this, it would complicate everything some more.

And if they mentioned his accident, as they definitely would, Sila would be back to him before they knew it.

Aahil would have it easy both ways. And he'd hate it anyway.

And wouldn't that be an injustice to Sila? His family or the accident, either way, the effort wouldn't be from the one person she deserved the effort from to win her back.

Such a mess.

But they couldn't convince the Jahangirs as they had done so with Sila's girl gang.

The Jahangirs' default setting was damage control whenever Aahil was involved but what they didn't realize, this was bigger than them.

Only Aahil could put back together what he had broken with his bare hands.

𝄞

"They are what?"

Sila asked incredulously. Naheed nodded, affirming what she had already relayed to her.

"Your in-laws are coming to take you back home. Mr. Faseeh called your Abu just a while back."

She saw Sila's face losing its color. Then her expression hardened. It scared Naheed.

"Sila, mera bacha, mera puttar, they're your family too. We can't stop them from coming over. And when children make mistakes, we have to guide them. Maybe, you both need this intervention."

Sila wanted to cry at her Ammi's naivety. She didn't blame her for having such a simple-minded solution to her and Aahil's situation. Not when she didn't know what had actually happened.

She might be deluded but Sila knew better than anyone what was happening here.

"I'll be right back, Ammi."

She came to the backyard and opened her phone to dial the number that was constantly appearing on the screen for many hours.

"Sila?"

Adan's relief-filled voice reached her after the first ring. "Thank God, you picked up. Do you have any idea how worried we all are? How are you? You were alone there in Islamabad for two days! Who does that? That idiot said something to you and you just took the next flight? You should've come straight to us. We all would've given him hell!"

Sila scrunched her face in regret. Did that man have any idea where he had brought her to?

"Adan! Slow down, please."

She pleaded. Adan stopped immediately.

"I'm fine. Listen, ...I'm not in the headspace to answer the rest of your questions but I just got to know from Ammi that you all are coming over... to take me with you. Is that right?"

"Of course, we are! We can't see it crashing down before our eyes. We will do what we must. It's our duty."

Sila chuckled. It was devoid of any hilarity. "And what about his?"

Adan's heavy silence told her everything. Of course. The heavy lifting was once again his family's responsibility.

"For how long and how many times will you all clear up his mess for him, Adan?"

"Sila, listen to me."

She shook her head. "I won't. Do you even know what happened between us? What did he say to me that made me leave?"

Adan took a long pause. "No."

"Then how will you convince me to come back? How will you make promises on someone else's behalf?"

"Sila, his circumstances—"

"Circumstances that are his own doing, Adan. Having a traumatic past is not the problem. Not doing anything about it is. And why would he make any effort, when he knows that his family will be there to save the day."

She didn't want to cry yet again but it was the only thing that came easy to her these days. "He has hurt me beyond measure, Adan. He broke me for something I had nothing to do with. And now to add insult to injury, he's sending you all for the damage control."

"He hasn't asked any of us to do that, Sila."

"Hard to believe with his track record. Adan, I've always considered you an older sister. I have nothing against you all. I'm not even mad that no one looked for me when I was gone. I know your priority was Aahil then. But you people always said I was part of the family."

"You're Sila. Please, don't hurt me by doubting it." Adan pleaded.

"Then don't come to take me back. I don't want to come back. Not yet. Not anytime soon. I'm not sure about anything. About this marriage. I need time. And space. Aahil...he's snatched the clarity I had about this relationship and I've never felt...so lost."

When the phone call came through, Adan was sure she'd tell Sila all about the accident.

But right there, she felt if the mention of it slipped through her lips, she'd be the cruelest person alive.

"No one will come, Sila. Not unless you want us to."

Sila sniffled. "Thank you."

She cut the call after that. But Adan couldn't move for a long while.

When she entered the living room, she found her whole family there. Faseeh, Sabah, and Faran wanted to leave today itself.

Her features became taut. Determined and resolute.

"Adan,"

Sabah called her. "Osma and Mahad are already at the hospital. Don't forget to send the dinner."

"I will. But Mama, I think there's no need for you to hand me your duties. You're not going anywhere."

Sabah was confused and so was everyone else. Adan pointed at her phone.

"I just got off a call with Sila. She doesn't want anyone to come get her and I've promised her that we won't."

Mrs. Irshad was the first one to object to her words. Unsurprisingly so.

"Why? Why would you promise her any such thing, Adan? Everyone in this house has lost their minds!"

Adan smiled dejectedly. "Maybe, I have. But that's the least I could do for her. Especially what is dished out to her by us and most importantly by Aahil."

She took in the horror on their faces. Yeah, saw it coming. All of them did.

"I always said to you all that our handling of Aahil's mess-ups isn't healthy. We never held him accountable. Instead of calling him out on his bullshit, we facilitated his escape routes and provided him luxury when he needed a reality check. We have done such a bad job, Mama. The result is before us. He's in the hospital bed and he's pushed Sila so far away that she's not sure if she'll ever come back or not."

She dropped herself on the couch, her head in her palms. "He's turned that happy, ambitious, and full-of-life girl to ...this. And it's not like he's been kinder to himself either.

"And she was still not angry at us. When she has every right to be. We chose the easy way out once again."

She faced her family once again. "Instead of being realistic about Aahil's trauma, we expected things to get better the moment Sila came into his life. How selfish of us it was! We should've told her about his patterns. That the moment it got tougher, he'd take the coward's way out, breaking everything in his wake. We are selfish still. Part of the reason we want her to come back is to lessen Aahil's pain. It's always about Aahil for us and never about Sila. And we dare to say to her face that she's part of the family."

Sabah looked away. She couldn't see Adan in the eye.

"I'm no better than you, Mama." Adan lamented. "When I saw her name on my phone, I had every intention to tell her what became of him after she left. He's in so much pain and deserves her close. But does Sila deserve this?"

Adan shook her head." No, she doesn't. It's high time we look past our myopic view. Aahil's accident, Sila's disappearance. What came before that? What he said to her to set everything in motion. That hurt her beyond measure."

She got up and reached Faseeh's side. "Sila deserves the world, Baba and it's only fitting that Aahil is the one who gives her that. Let him have this. Whenever he's ready. Whenever he has the mental and physical normalcy back. This is the one battle of his we should sit out. We can't salvage this for him. And for the first time, he doesn't want us to."

The finality in her voice was punctuated by Faseeh's nod.

It was time to do what they should've done long back.

Let Aahil right what he had wronged.

Music then.

Sila now.

Both times, he had barely survived.

𝄞

Tracing the outline of fingers, Adan held his hand in hers and gave him a long stare.

He was wide awake.

"What have you done to your life, Aahil?"

He blinked. His eyes slowly found hers.

"No one's going to Murree. If anyone from our family does, it'll be you."

He pursed his lips, the movement taking the strength it had never required before. But all that herculean effort couldn't stop the tears.

"She's hurt beyond measure. You haven't done right by her. But only you will put everything back. That's the most you can do. That's the least she deserves from you."

She gave his hand a gentle squeeze and got up. She had barely taken a step when a broken whisper reached her.

"Th..ank you."

Adan turned around. "Don't thank me just yet. It's not going to be easy."

"I ..know. I...don't want it to..."

She wanted to laugh at his declaration. But at the same time, she wanted to bawl her eyes out.

Oh, Aahil.

𝄞

It was hours after Adan left. Osama and Mahad thought he was asleep. He didn't prove them wrong. He himself wasn't sure if there was anything to prove. It was almost the same.

He blinked at the ceiling. The dim lighting was a relief.

And then he felt it. The head on his shoulder. The hand in his.

His fingers fiddled with the ring.

"Sila..."

He whispered into the darkness.

"Can't...be you...."

The head on his shoulder stayed. The hand in his did too.

His fingers fiddled with the ring.

"Why...it can't be you..."

Slowly, with a heavy heart, he drifted off to sleep.

𝄞

Another night of tossing and turning was upon her. Tired of this useless exercise, she lay on her back, staring at the ceiling.

And then she felt it. The shoulder beneath her head. The hand in hers.

The fingers fiddled with her ring.

"I hate you."

She whispered into the darkness.

The shoulder beneath her head stayed. The hand in hers did too.

The fingers fiddled with her ring.

She brought her other hand close and took off her ring before she changed her mind. Opening the side drawer, she threw it inside and closed it. Her heart stubbornly remained there with it.

"It should've never been you."

Slowly, with a heavy sigh, she drifted off to sleep.

𝄞