S t e l l a ✦

When morning came, I could feel that my face was puffy from all the crying last night so I quickly went and washed my face with very very cold water and drank a lot of water.

Thankfully, it was pretty early still and I suspect that my travel mates are still asleep.

I went ahead and took a shower and picked out my clothes for the day. Apparently today, we were going boating and we might go in the water so I picked out clothes where I could easily put on and off.

As I was just finishing with putting my shirt on, I jumped when I heard something ringing.

Scared that it might wake up the others, I quickly searched for it. I was surprised to find that it was this small compact powder looking thing. Whether it was some sort of new gadget, I don't really know, it's my first time seeing it.

I didn't know how to stop it from ringing and it seemed like it was getting louder and louder by the ring so I kept pressing it.

When I was just about to feel relieved that it had stopped, I was surprised when an image of Cassian lit up from the device.

His head was on the table and there was a bored look on his face, but when he saw me, he bolted up on his seat.

"S-Stella?!" he exclaimed, just as surprised as I was. I started feeling nervous, confused about what was currently happening.

"Uh... uhm... this thing was ringing and I-- I, wait, how are you here? Wh-what is this thing?" I asked, confused.

Have we finally succeeded in inventing holograms? I don't think I've ever heard of that.

Cassian seemed to have collected himself and he nodded.

"Uh, yeah you must be surprised.., sorry about that. Uh... well, this thing is a communication device we usually use. Phones and human technology causes harms to our hearing and senses so we have developed our own device." he shortly explained as he cleared his throat.

I nodded in understanding and simply accepted it although I had many questions about the device. I mean this thing could completely change the world and here it was casually used by mystical creatures.

There was a bit of silence, but I could see that Cassian too was just surprised.

"I... I didn't expect you to answer the call," he started and my mind seemed to swoon over the fact that he was the one that called me, "but uhm, I hope you don't mind, but I was just really curious on how you're doing. I haven't heard from you the whole day yesterday." he said, his tone sounding a bit disappointed.

So he's been worrying over me since yesterday?

I instantly felt bad, but then again I remembered that I had no duty to report to him.

"I'm sorry about that, I didn't know if we were at that stage of... informing each other." I couldn't help but say and looked down on my hands.

I just didn't understand him. I don't understand this whole mate thing, but I'm trying.

When I see how the others are with their mate, I can't help but think if that should be Cassian and me too, am I the only one hindering us from being something special to each other?

"Uh, ye-yeah totally, I understand," he said stammering and when I looked at him momentarily, he was also looking away to avoid the awkwardness.

Great, Stella, just great. Way to make someone feel uncomfortable.

"But I'm fine. I appreciate you worrying about me," I started, "I'm with the other girls and I can tell that they're strong so I know I'll be safe with them." I assured him.

Finally, he looked back up and looked me in the eyes.

"You're right, you're in good hands." he said simply. Cassian looked like he was about to say something more, but with the line that I previously drew, he was probably restraining himself.

I took a deep breath and collected my thoughts.

"I actually have something to ask from you, a favor, if that's alright with you."

I saw him raise an eyebrow, curious about which favour I was about to ask from him.

"Anything for you Stella," he answered which made me smile.

"Well, I was wondering if you could come with me to where I used to live. I left something important there and... I need it."

I could see his eyebrows furrowing for a bit, he must've known that the previous place I used to live in wasn't all that good. I thought he was going to say no, but to my surprise, he fixed how he sat and sighed.

"Of course I can, but I can't promise I won't do something reckless. If ever anyone tries to hurt you, I won't hesitate to--"

"Well, I don't think they'll try to do anything with you by my side, but if ever they do, just don't overdo it."

Cassian smiled again and nodded, looking all proud.

"Alright, I'll leave you have your fun there, I'm going to catch some sleep cause I ended up staying up the whole night." he recounted and I looked at him closely.

His face did seem very tired and he looked like he had bags under his beautiful grey eyes. His hair was disheveled in a manner that looked like he passed his hand through his hair one too many times.

"Weren't you able to sleep?" I asked, worried that he's putting his health at risk.

I knew he had a lot of work, but was it so much that he forgot even about his sleep. Maddie explained to me that being an Alpha, Cassian was constantly doing work to protect the pack and other packs.

Cassian yawned and answered, "I couldn't sleep because I wasn't able to make sure personally that you're really doing fine, but now that I got to talk to you, I can rest easy."

I was stunned again with his words. I mean, how does someone just say those kind of words so naturally and casually?!

I felt like my heart leaped and I was forced to look down again. Do I mean that much to him?

When I wasn't responding, I heard Cassian's low and amused laugh.

"Sorry, that was a bit too forward wasn't it." he apologized, but it didn't seem like he was sorry at all.

As for me, I mustered my courage to ask him.

"Am I that important to you? I mean, you haven't even known me for long." I asked.

Although he seemed surprised with the question, he smiled at me with the sweetest smile that made my heart leap again.

"You're that important to me Stella. You may not know it, but you've turned my whole life around," he said and paused for a bit, "and I keep asking myself why I haven't met you earlier."

There he was again with his words. Where did he learn to make someone's heart flutter like this?

Like how am I supposed to respond to that.

"Well, don't worry yourself of me, I can take care of myself, so get some sleep." I said simply and I felt lightly irked because I've never said these kind of words to anyone.

For what comfort, it seemed to have lit him up.

"Alright, just call me whenever. I'll always be here for you," he assured and I simply nodded.

"Yeah, good night..."

✦

I ended up going back to sleep myself after that because the others didn't seem to be waking up anytime soon. After all, it was six in the morning and I got ready way too early.

Hazel was the one who ended up waking me up at around ten and I was also surprised how long I had slept. By that time, breakfast was already ready and we went ahead to eat.

The day went by pretty eventfully. Our first stop was at the beach where Hazel made sure that we had our private area away from the crowd.

We first did jet skiing which terrified Hannah and me at first, but as time went by, Hannah and I got the hang of it and were even able to ride on our own by the end.

Next thing, we did was snorkelling and at first I had no idea what I was doing so I kept drinking in sea water, but again, I eventually got the hang of it. And since I didn't know how to swim, I had to use a life jacket all throughout.

The activities were full of laughter and just telling stories although I didn't have many to tell because it would sour the happy mood.

After the exhausting activities though, we were all just getting hungry and realized we skipped lunch just to keep playing on the water. And we were supposed to be important people, I know.

"Can you guys hold out the hunger, we'll just eat on the yacht, we have our best chef cooking for us." she said looking pretty stressed and worn out.

"Don't worry about it, Stella, we ate a big breakfast." Hannah answered for all of us.

We were talking about the snorkelling when the yacht came on the deck where we were all waiting and hopped on quickly.

There were three men who were already standing as we entered and they quickly introduced themselves to be the captain, the server and the chef, Rowell.

Hazel seemed to be well acquainted with the chef as she left us around the lounge area to catch up with him. As for the three of us, we were dead tired so as we waited for Hazel, we didn't realize that we all dozed off.

When I came into, the boat had already drifted far away from the shore and now the boat was slowly sailing around.

The sun was already hanging low on the sky, but it was still far from sunset.

Hazel was still nowhere to be seen and I decided to go look for her.

My steps wobbled and I had to grab onto the walls for balance and as I walked around, going towards the back of the boat, I couldn't help but be amazed at the view in front of me.

With the sea spread out before me with and looking like it had no end, with the sky looking so big and wide, I realized just how big the world is outside of that small town.

There were beautiful places like theses, there were kind people like the three Lunas I had just met, that I wasn't just born to be hated.

At this moment, all of my worries, my anxiety and my insecurities seemed to be washed away with the waves. I felt all warm inside although the wind that blew was quite chilly.

"Beautiful isn't it?" I heard a voice from behind say. Surprised, I turn to see Hazel.

Her long golden hair blew with the hair and her eyes that reflected the sea seemed to glisten as the sun hit them.

"Are you okay? Why are you crying?" she asked me and it had just dawned on me that tears were already flowing from my eyes.

I quickly wiped them and turned around back to the sea. "Oh nothing, I was just so amazed by the view that it made me think things."

Hazel was already beside me and I could see her smiling as if she understood exactly where I was coming from. As if she was already been in the same situation as me.

"It does that to me too," she said, "it makes me think that sometimes all we need is a little quiet and peace away from everything to really understand what you're going through. How about you? What does it make you think?"

I stayed silent for a while, finding my words and how to say them as they're all jumbled in my head.

"Well, I've just been thinking about how the world is so much bigger than our problems, our fears and all things that confuses us on the inside." I said trying my best to put my thoughts into words.

Hazel smiled at me and had a look that seemed like she was proud of me and it kind of made me feel shy.

I looked away and tucked my hair behind my ear as I spoke again, "And I guess I just wanted to thank you and Hannah and Maddie of course. For all of this, for now. You guys have been so caring and although I don't know how to repay you guys, I just want to let you know that I'm overflowing with gratitude."

I thought it was going to feel cheesy and awkward telling my honest feelings, but surprisingly, it felt more relieving. Like a part of the load I carried had been loaded off my chest.

Hazel shook her head as she smiled.

"You don't owe us anything, Stella. We're doing this because we want to, because you're one of us."

I felt somewhat assured, but the insecure thoughts can't help but surface again and this time, I couldn't hold them back.

"Hazel, you say that I'm a warrior right? But w-what if I don't become good enough? I mean I'm not even a werewolf, what if I hold you all back?" I ask, the flashback of the foresight I had appearing in my mind, "What if I don't do enough for you guys? Wh--what if I'm not good enough to help any of you? And what if I'm not a good enough mate for Cassian?"

Even I didn't expect the barrel of questions that poured out of my mouth and now it was too late to take them back.

This time, Hazel looked concerned.

I could feel the tears rising again so I looked up to prevent them from falling.

But Hazel grabbed my hand and held it tightly.

"Stella, look at me," she cooed and spoke gently as if I was a child and when I wouldn't, she repeated her words until I finally looked back at her, but now the tears were falling again.

"Just you being here is enough for all of us, Stella. Seeing you smile and laugh and doing well is more than what we can ever ask for. To us, your wellbeing comes first than you being a warrior and I'm sure Cassian thinks the same way too. You're enough for us Stella no matter what anyone says, no matter what your mind tells you, you're enough."

And just like that, just with those words, the fears and insecurities inside of me started to melt away.

For the rest of the night, I would never get the words off my mind.

'You're enough.'

✦ ✦ ✦✦

Reviewed: January 13th, 2022.
Please note that grammatical errors may still appear.