FOURTEEN: Becoming Whelmed

For a moment, I didn't care that Artemis had taken me hostage. The only thing I wanted to do was hug her and never let her go.

She didn't give me the chance. Instead, she flung me against the wall and grabbed her bow, getting an arrow ready.

"Are you going to kill me, Artemis?" I asked softly. "Is that what it's come to?"

"Pretty much," she replied dryly.

"I won't fight you, Artemis. I refuse to hurt you."

"You can't hurt me, Robin. Nothing can." She sounded cold and detached, but there was something in her eyes that told me my friend was still in there.

"I know what happened, Artemis... I know about Wally."

"You don't know shit, Robin! You weren't there!"

"I know. I'm so sorry, Artemis. I should have been there. I would have done anything to save you guys."

She let her arrow fly. I barely moved out of the way in time to dodge it. I stared at Artemis and tried to figure out how to get through to her.

"M'Gann showed me what happened," I said.

"M'Gann is dead," Artemis replied sharply. She aimed another arrow at me, but she didn't release it.

"I know. It's a long story, but I connected to her, and she showed me a lot. I saw it all from her point of view. Her spirit saw what happened to Conner and Wally..." I paused. "Artemis, I know you don't want this. You just didn't want to hurt anymore, and I get that, but you need to hurt. It's the only thing that will save you. You have to feel the things the evil repressed."

"Why the hell would I do that?" She demanded. "I'm free, Robin. Nothing hurts anymore."

"I don't think that's true. I think you still feel it. In fact, I think it's so overwhelming that it's all you feel, but the poison makes your grief translate into rage. You've always been good at rage, Artemis. You embrace it because it makes you stronger, but this isn't strength. They turned you into a puppet and you can't see it."

"Shut up!" She shouted. "I am no one's puppet!"

"I know, which is why I know you want to fight this." I paused. "Wally's dead, Artemis. He's dead. He died to protect you, and that hurts."

She loosed her arrow. It hit me in my shoulder. I cried out in pain, but I knew it hadn't hit anything vital, so I tried to remain calm. I pulled it out, refusing to scream in pain no matter how tempted I was.

"Shut your fucking mouth, Robin, or the next one goes in your heart," Artemis said coldly.

"You didn't shoot to kill," I realized aloud.

"If I shot to kill, you'd already be dead," she replied.

"Artemis, you have to remember. You're still in there. I can help you."

"I don't need help, Robin!"

"Dick," I said softly. "My name is Dick."

She hesitated. "Grayson..." She mumbled, as if a distant dream was coming back to her. "Dick Grayson..."

"You know me, Artemis. Even without being superheroes together, you and I were friends. We went to school together."

"You were younger..." She looked like she was trying to touch the emotions attached to her memories but couldn't. "You took a goofy picture of us before you even introduced yourself..." She shook her head. "So what? Was that supposed to make me spare you?"

"No," I replied, "but I'm not Robin anymore, and I thought you should know."

"So what do I call you now?" She taunted me. "Wingman? I mean, that's what you were, right? Batman's wingman?"

I thought for a moment. Wing wasn't so bad. I wanted a name that honored my past but still showed I was no longer that boy. Robin was a bird, and birds had wings. So did bats... But Wingman was a sidekick's name, and I was no longer just some sidekick. I was all grown up, and just like Bruce, I had been touched by way too much darkness to ever be the same again. I wasn't the chipper little baby bird anymore... I was the night.

"Nightwing," I said. "I'm Nightwing."

Artemis smirked. "Well then, Nightwing, you're gonna need a new costume," she replied. "This one's a little bit colorful for the embodiment of night."

"You're not wrong. Assuming I live long enough, I'll work on that." I paused. "Will I live long enough, Artemis?"

"I'll have Overryde make you a more appropriate suit to wear in your coffin," she replied dryly.

"I appreciate that, but if it's all the same, I'd rather just bury this suit... Without me in it."

"Don't worry," a new voice said. "There won't be anything left to bury when I'm through with you."

I looked at the latest arrivals. Vic had spoken, but he wasn't alone. Clark was with him.

Crap, I thought. "So not feeling the Aster..." I mumbled. "Better get traught..."

Artemis tensed slightly. Her expression remained blank, but there was something in her eyes. My comment had sparked something inside of her.

Clark grabbed me and tilted my head at an odd angle, keeping it firmly in his hands. "Stop playing with your food, Artemis," he said. "This ends now."

"Wait a minute," Artemis replied sharply. "This one's mine, Superman."

He grinned sadistically. "Very well. Take your shot, Artemis, but if you miss, I'll finish the job." He didn't release me, and I knew he could snap my neck at any second with little effort.

Artemis smirked and nocked an arrow. "This is a special arrow, just for you," she said.

She loosed the arrow and I prepared to meet my end. I was very confused when Clark released me and sank to his hands and knees. I looked down and saw the glowing green light coming from the tip of the arrowhead.

"Traitor!" Vic shouted. He tried to attack Artemis, but she loosed another arrow. All of the tech in the room short-circuited... Including Vic.

"Go," Artemis said to me.

"Come with me," I begged.

"We don't have time to argue! That was an EMP arrowhead. It only lasts for a couple of minutes, and then everything will come back online, including Cyborg."

"You saved me. I'm not leaving you."

"Don't be an idiot!"

"They'll kill you if you stay. You betrayed them."

She cursed. "I didn't really stop to think about the consequences of my actions," she admitted.

"Why did you save me?" I pushed gently.

"Because he was about to snap your neck!" She shouted. "I already watched him do that to Superboy. I wasn't going to watch him do that to someone else I loved."

"Artemis... You still care about me."

"I had a momentary lapse of judgment because you're a little dork who invents phrases like feeling the Aster and thinks traught is the opposite of distraught, and I guess I had a flashback or whatever when you said what you did." She shrugged, but I could tell she was trying to deny what she was feeling.

M'Gann... Artemis is so close... I think I can help her, I thought.

And suddenly, I could feel Artemis's mind. I knew this would be different. I didn't need to read her mind, I needed to send my memories of what M'Gann had shown me into her mind. I focused, forcing myself to feel the grief all over again as Wally's death replayed before my eyes.

"Stop!" Artemis screamed. She clutched her head in her hands and let out a cry of rage. I kept replaying the memory. Artemis began sobbing, finally sinking onto her hands and knees in grief.

"Wally!" She screamed.

I knelt down and wrapped my arms around her tightly. I let my own tears fall. "I'm sorry, Artemis," I said. "I should have been there. I'm so sorry."

She sobbed in my arms, her entire body trembling. "Don't," she said softly. "It's not your fault. I'm glad you weren't there... I could have lost you, too..." She shook her head, took a deep breath, and said, "Enough of this. We need to get out of here."

The electronics started coming back online. Vic was starting to stir. Clark was still weak because the Kryptonite-laced arrowhead was too close to him, but Vic was enough of a threat on his own.

Constantine, if you can hear me, I could really use a portal right about now, I thought.

I'm on it, Mate, he replied. Congrats on still being alive.

A portal opened. I stood up and offered Artemis my hand. She stubbornly ignored my hand to stand up on her own, but she took it as I began racing toward the portal.

We made it through, and Constantine closed the portal just before Vic could follow us.

"That useless drunk left Grayson behind?" Damian's voice demanded as his face glared at Kara from one of the screens in the Batcave.

"I'm right here, Damian," I said. "Constantine just opened a portal for me."

"Thank goodness!" Kara cried. She ran toward me and hugged me. I winced slightly.

"Dick, are you hurt?" Zatanna asked from the screen.

My shoulder was still bleeding from the arrow. "It's nothing serious," I replied.

"I shot him," Artemis said, stepping into view of the webcam.

"Artemis?" Zatanna asked in shock. "You're... You're there?"

"Hey, Zee," she replied calmly.

"Dick, how did you save her?"

"I didn't exactly save her," I replied. "I just got through to her enough to make her realize she didn't want to watch Superman kill me."

Kara looked horrified. "Are you okay?" She asked.

"I'll be fine," I promised.

Caitlin began examining my injury. "It didn't do much damage," she said. "I should be able to patch this up without an issue. Your shoulder will be sore for a while, though."

I nodded. "How's Harley?" I asked.

"She's stable... Well, physically stable. I'm pretty sure mental stability went out the window a long time ago for her."

"I took her upstairs to rest while she gets the blood transfusion. Ivy stayed with her," Kara added.

"Zee, did Billy and Gar make it to you guys?" I asked.

"They did," Zatanna replied. "I healed Gar as much as I could. He should be alright... Billy's with him."

"Constantine, once Caitlin's done with me, can you send me and Artemis to the House of Mystery?"

"Sure. Why the rush?" He asked.

"I think Artemis needs the mirror."

"I don't really care if my hair's a mess, Nightwing," Artemis said.

"Nightwing?" Kara repeated.

"It's my new secret identity," I explained, "but you guys can still call me Dick." I looked at Artemis. "It's not that kind of mirror, Artemis. Do you trust me?"

"I don't trust anyone," Artemis replied, "but what's the deal with the mirror?"

"It's how I saw M'Gann. It's a doorway."

Artemis hesitated. "Alright," she said after a minute. "Whatever. I'll go with you."

"You're stable," Caitlin said, "but don't go alone. You don't know if you can trust this girl right now. Take Supergirl, and leave the rest of us misfits here."

"Don't worry, Mate," Constantine said. "Misfits are my people. I can handle anything they can throw my way. We'll follow behind you once Harley's good to go."

"Alright," I agreed, although leaving three possible bad guys and a drunk Brit in Wayne Manor unsupervised wouldn't have been my first choice. I knew helping Artemis was the most important thing at the moment.

The portal opened, and we stepped through it together. Instead of it leaving us in the living room, it opened into the room with the mirror. I positioned Artemis in front of it. She was about to protest when she froze.

To be fair, so did I. Wally stood in the mirror, which was what I'd hoped would happen, but nothing could have mentally prepared me to see my dead best friend.

"Hey, Babe," he said to Artemis. "Looking good."

"This is some sort of trick," Artemis said. "You're not real."

"Oh, I'm real. I swear... I'm sorry I died, Beautiful, but I never left you... And I never will," Wally promised.

"You asshole!" Artemis shouted. She hit her fists against the mirror. I was kind of impressed that the glass didn't break. "You did leave me! You died in my arms, Wally! You fucking died!"

Her rage shifted into sorrow as she began to cry. "You died..." She whispered. "You died, Wally..."

Her reflection reappeared, and I nearly started crying as I saw Wally's arms wrap around Artemis. "Hold onto me, Artemis... When the darkness flares up, just know I'm right here, holding onto you," Wally said. "That will keep you from losing control until they can cure the poison. You are the toughest person I know. Fight, Artemis. Fight."

She looked at me before nodding. "There's still more to lose," she said. "I'll fight, Wally. I promise I'll keep fighting until we win."

"That's my girl!" He grinned, and he seemed so alive that, for just a second, I forgot he was dead.

When reality sank back in, I suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe. I was having a massive panic attack and I couldn't stop it.

"Dick..." Artemis said gently. She seemed much more like herself. The light had even returned to her eyes.

"I'm sorry," I said, still gasping for breath.

"Come on, Buddy," Wally said. "You need to be whelmed... Feel the aster... Get traught!"

"You're dead, Wall... I'm allowed to be distraught for a little while," I replied sadly.

"No you're not," Artemis said. "It's not fair, and it sucks, but we're stuck in a war we can't lose, so get traught, Dick. Get traught right freaking now."

I had once given her that same advice. I sighed. "Okay," I said, forcing myself to take a deep breath. "I'm traught. I'm whelmed. And eventually, I'll be feeling the aster."

"So... Nightwing, huh?" Wally asked with a smirk. "I like it. Totally mysterious. You'll definitely have ladies lining up to win your affection with a name like that."

"Shut up, Wally," I said. I started laughing after a minute, and it felt so good, so natural...

"I miss you," I said sadly.

"I know. I miss you, too," Wally replied. "I love you, buddy... Take care of my girl, okay?"

"She can take care of herself," I said before Artemis could, "but I've got her back anyway."

He smiled as if he didn't have a care in the Universe. "And Babe?" He began. "You take care of my boy, okay?"

"Someone has to," Artemis replied. "I've got him, Wally... We've got each other."

"Good. I love you, Artemis."

"I love you, too," she replied. Her grief was clear, but so was her strength. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that Artemis would survive this.

Wally faded away, and suddenly, we were just staring at our own reflections.

"Are you whelmed?" I asked softly.

"Feeling the aster," Artemis replied. She sighed before hugging me. "Thanks for this, Dick. It helped me more than you'll ever know."

I returned the hug. "It actually helped me, too," I admitted.

"Are you feeling the aster?" She teased me.

"Not yet," I replied. "But I'm ready to fake it until I do."