Chapter 12

Sola’s POV

“Let’s go… I don’t want to marry my family…” mahinang bulong ko kaya napatango siya sa akin. Nilagay niya lang ang helmet sa aking ulo bago niya ako nginitian. Mariin ko lang na kinagat ang aking labi bago ako sumakay sa kaiyang motor.

“Hold tight. You can cry your eyes out,” bulong niya pa.

Ganoon lang ang ginawa ko. The whole ride, I was just crying. Sobrang bagal lang din ng kaniyang pagpapatakbo. He didn’t need to say anything at all. I already feel comforted through this. I’m glad that I have someone right now.

Sakto ring kumalma na’y nakarating kami sa isang parke.

“Just wait here. I’ll buy you drink.”Ngumiti pa sa akin si Rough matapos niyang alisin ang aking helmet. Para akong batang sunod-sunod lang ang tango sa kaniya. He just smile at me before he went to the convenience store near here. Bahagyang kumurba ang ngiti mula sa aking mga labi habang pinagmamasdan na bawat tinatapakan niya’y nagkakaroon ng kulay. He really brighten everything. I hope he can remain a happy person like this.

Mayamaya lang ay bumalik na siya sa aking gawi. May dala-dala na siyang ice coffee at tubig naman sa kabila.

“Here’s your comfort drink.” Bahagya akong natawa nang tanggapin ‘yon. He really knows me now.

He was just looking at me when I drink. Naiiling na lang akong napangiti.

“I’m fine now. No need to feel worried. I already cry my ass out,” sambit ko. Napanguso naman ako nang guluhin niya ang buhok ko.

“You did well for crying whatever makes you feel bad.” Ngumiti pa siya sa akin. Natahimik na kaming dalawa habang inuuga ang duyan naming dalawa. Pareho lang ding nakatingin sa kawalan.

“Sola…” banggit ni Rough sa pangalan ko. Nagtataka ko siyang nilingon doon.

“Hmm?”

“If you ever need someone to be with. I’ll always lend myself to you…” aniya sa akin kaya napatingin ako sa kaniya. I can’t help but smile sadly at that.

“How I wish I have you in my life…” In my reality. In that hellish life I have…

“You have me, Sola. No matter what happened you have me. If you think that you don’t have anything at all, mayroon kang ako…” he said before smiling at me. Those genuine smile of him again. Kusang kumurba ang ngiti mula sa aking mga labi ko roon. He can really make me smile just by showing me those perfect set of teeth he have.

“I don’t think you’ll be able to say that when you realize that I stole something more than life,” mahina kong bulong, hindi rin gustong iparinig sa kaniya. I stole her identity, I stole everything around her and of course, I stole her meaningful life.

“If you ever feel wanting to be with someone, call me. Anytime,” he said again before giving me a paperbag. Agad napaawang ang labi ko roon.

“And this is?”

“Salad. Ang sabi mo’y ipagdekwat kita,” aniya kaya hindi ko na napigilan pa ang matawa.

“Nagbibiro lang ako! Nasisiraan ko na ba ng bait!” tanong ko subalit tumawa lang siya roon.

“Don’t tell me you really stole this from your house?” Pinaningkitan ko pa siya ng mata.

“No. Not really. Mama already know that your house is just near here, they said na ipagdala ko kayo. Hindi ko na naibigay pa ang para kina Tita dahil medyo nataranta na ako nang makita ang mukha mo. Mukha kang pinagsakluban ng langit at lupa,” natatawa niyang saad subalit napatitig lang din ako sa kaniya. Bago pa siya makapagsalita ulit ay niyakap ko na ‘to.

“Thank you…” mahina kong sambit kaya ginulo niya lang ang buhok ko.

“Ikaw pa ba? Malakas ka kaya sa akin,” aniya kaya napatawa na lang ako bago nailing.

Saka ko nga lang din napagtanto na ikunwento niya na naman ako sa kaniyang pamilya.

“Don’t worry, they like you. Especially my younger brother. They actually want to meet you sooner. You’ll go there before new year’s eve, right?” tanong niya pa sa akin. Tumango ako roon.

Mrs. Elizabeth and Mr. Daniel looks like they really like spoiling their child. Pumayag din agad ang mga ‘to ng magpaalam ako nang mag-aya si Rough. Isa pa, kilala na nila ito sa ilang beses ba naman nilang nakikita si Rough. Kapag hindi rin ako matawagan, it’s either kay Rough or Hugh tumatawag ang mga ‘to.

“By the way, Hugh is planning to visit here too. Sayang lang at abala pa si Tito kaya baka hindi sila matuloy,” ani Rough.

“Oh. He should just stay there. Neela and him are always together for the past days, right?” Isang malapad na ngisi pa ang pinakawalan ko. Neela and Hugh had gotten close matapos ang intrams at foundation sa school. Well, dami rin kasing kilalang estudyante ni Neela roon.

Madalas na nakikita silang magkasama but when I’m asking about it to Hugh o ‘di kaya’y inaasar ko siya sa kaniya, lagi itong nagagalit sa akin. I don’t know with that guy, masiyado lang din talagang bugnutin. But I think the two of them are slowly leveling up, kalat sa dalawang school na nakikita silang magkasama. Pero ganoon din kay Justin kaya tingin ko’y patas pa ang labanan. Around next school year ay sasagutin na ni Neela si Justin but it looks like Hugh still have the chance.

Bahagyang napataas ang kilay ko nang makitang nakatitig sa akin si Rough.

“What?” Nagtataka ko pa siyang tinignan.

“Hmm, it’s nothing.” Ngumiti pa siya bago napakibit ng balikat.

Habang nag-uusap ay hindi ko na rin namamalayan na sinasabi ko na ang kung ano nga ba talagang problema sa kaniya.

“I feel sorry for them. I feel like this girl is slowly drifting away from her parents,” ani ko. Agad kumunot ang noo niya dahil sa sinabi ko.

“I mean, I feel like I’m drifting away from my parents. It was so awkward for me to even have a conversation with them. I heard my mom saying that she wants the old me back. It’s funny that I don’t even know what’s the old me.” Para na lang din akong nasisiraan ng bait dahil hindi rin talaga alam kung paano ko ba uumpisahang ayusin ang relasiyon ng may-ari ng katawan na ito.

“You know what, I don’t really think that they want the old you. They just want you back. They actually know that you’re not growing if you won’t change. Maybe they just want to hear you calling them Mom and Dad… You feeling home whenever going at your house… Small things like that. And you’re right too. Maybe they will always miss the old you but at the end of the day they will still embrace the person you are today,” he said with a wide smile while looking at me.

Bahagya akong napangiti roon. He can really convince me with his words. Those celebration we have ended up becoming a advising session.

Kalaunan ay umuwi na rin kami. Rough didn’t go immediately. Hinintay rin naming lumabas sina Mrs. and Mr. Mandirigma dahil gusto ring makapagpaalam nang maayos ni Rough.

“Hmm, did you enjoy your date?” tanong ni Mrs. Elizabeth. Nasamid ako sa sarili kong laway at agad ding nanlaki ang mga mata.

“It’s not a date po. It’s just a friendly light snack outside po, Tita.” Napatawa pa nang mahina si Rough bago napahawak sa kaniyang batok.

“Pinabibigay po pala ni Mama, pasensiya na po at hindi na matigas.” Iniabot niya ang graham na bigay ng kaniyang ina.

“Nako, salamat, Hijo. Nag-abala ka pa,” ani Mrs. Elizabeth.

“Masiyado ka atang na-excite nang makita ang anak ko at hindi mo na nagawang iabot sa amin ito,” ani Mr. Daniel kaya napaubo ulit ako. Ramdam ko na rin ang pamumula ng mukha dahil sa hiya.

“Ganoon na nga po,” pagbibiro naman ni Rough kaya nagtawanan pa sila.

Napatingin naman ako kay Mrs. and Mr. Daniel. Tila ba ang laki rin kasi talaga ng tiwala nila sa Sola ng mundong ‘to. Ang dali lang nilang payagan sa kahit ano at talagang suportado sa kung ano ang gusto.

“Let’s go inside now, Hon. Hayaan muna natin silang mag-usap,” ani Mrs. Elizabeth dahil napansin na nakatingin pa rin kami ni Rough sa isa’t isa.

“See? Your parents really love you so much. Don’t worry about things you’re thinking about, they will surely listen if you talk too…” Ginulo niya pa ang buhok ko kaya napangiti na lang ako bago napatango.

“I’ll get going now. Thank you for today and I’m sorry that I ruin it.” Kumunot ang noo niya roon.

“What are you saying again? You didn’t. I’m glad that you tell me what you feel. Always remember that I’m just three town away or 10 step from your house.” Napatawa na lang ako nang mahina roon bago nagpaalam sa kaniya.

“Good night, Rough.” Kumaway lang ako bago pumasok sa loob. Agad naman akong natigilan nang makita ko si Mr. and Mrs. Mandirigma na nakadungaw na sa bintana ng kanilang kwarto. Nang makita nila ako’y agad silang lumayo roon.

I can’t help but smile while looking at them. The owner of this life is really lucky to have them as her parent. How I wish I also have someone like them in my life.

Sa kanilang kwarto ako dumeretso instead of going on my room.

Nakadalawang katok pa lang ako nang binuksan ni Mrs. Elizabeth ang kwarto.

“Hmm, what’s the problem, Baby?” malambing niyang tanong sa akin.

“I’m sorry po… For acting so out of character these past few months…” mahinang sambit ko habang pinaglalaruan ang aking daliri. Pakiramdam ko nga’y kahit ngayon ay out of character pa rin ako.

Unti-unti akong napatingin kay Mrs. Elizabeth nang hindi siya nagsalita, mayamaya lang ay napayakap na ito sa akin bago siya umiyak. Bahagyang napaawag ang labi ko roon.

“I thought you don’t like talking with us anymore,” aniya sa akin. I don’t really know what to say to her at all. But starting that day, I tried to become a good daughter too. Sinubukan ko pa ngang mag-search ng kung paano maging mabuting anak dahil kailanman ay hindi ko naranasan.

And each hours I’m here, I can’t help but be happy.

“Is it really fine po?” Napatawa pa ako nang mahina dahil narito kami sa garden ni Mrs. Elizabeth or should I say Mommy. It was still awkward calling them that but slowly I’m trying to get use with it.

“No. She would probably kill me once she saw me but still, this will look good in your outfit.” Ngumisi pa siya nang mapatingin sa akin kaya hindi ko maiwasan ang mapatawa nang mahina bago napailing na lang.

Natatawa na lang ako nang kinuhanan niya pa ako ng litrato. Paniguradong lagot nga siya kay Mrs. Elizabeth kung sakali.

Ilang picture pa ang naganap bago niya ako kinausap nang masinsinan.

“How are you in your school, Baby? I know that you’re easy to talk with but I hope you’re not stressing yourself…” aniya sa akin kaya napatitig lang ako bago napangiti bago umiling.

“I’m good po… It was fun in my school…” Maybe because of friends? Atmosphere? Or maybe because it’s my dream school? I don’t know. I just know that I’m always thankf for every little seconds I’m staying there.

“What about your lovelife? I like Rough better. Hugh rejected you how many times. Malabo ata ang mata ng batang ‘yon, dapat sila ang nagpapalit ni Rough,” aniya pa kaya napatawa ako nang mahina bago napailing.

“There’s nothing going on with my lovelife po. I’m just focusing on my self for now. Hugh and Rough are just my friends.” Ngumiti pa ako sa kaniya.

“But I don’t think Rough thinks the same,” aniya na malapad pa na ngumisi sa akin. Napatikhim naman ako roon bago napailing.

Mang-aasar pa sana siya subalit dumating na si Mrs. Elizabeth na naniningkit ang mga mata or should I say nanlilisik na habang nakatingin kay Mr. Daniel.

“Daniel Agustin Mandirigma!”