A month and a half later...

Apparently, a set way to approach my conflicted feelings about graduating did not exist. I knew that because I had spent long hours after my high-school graduation searching all over the Internet for a walk-through.

My search history was now flooded with questions Google refused to answer in any satisfying way, such as "Graduated high school, now what?", "What on earth do you even do after graduating?", "Is it normal that my body still wakes up at 6 a.m. even without my alarm?", "What am I doing with my life?", "What's the meaning of life?"

And while it was always fun to have an emotional crisis right after graduation, Google proved to be an ineffective source for all my venting. Perhaps I should have known better by now. There were no walk-throughs when I needed them. No shortcuts. And maybe it was better that way; I had to grow up all by myself.

"Thanks for breakfast," Dad said, popping his head through the door of the living room. "I'm leaving now. See you later. Oh, and don't forget we're meeting your mom and Roy tomorrow evening."

I gave him a thumbs-up without moving. With my eyes closed and my arms open, I lay on the couch as comfortably as it would allow me to and compelled my mind to focus on the implications of graduation. Only one thing came to mind: I had no idea what I was doing.

Some had tried to prevent the storm before it had started. Henry and Jayce—who spent most of our conversations arguing that they weren't a couple—had offered to help me with college applications since they had both been admitted to Duke. Bradley suggested that I join the military with him. Jacob invited me to sign up with him for a clothing design internship at a company where he hoped to introduce his cultural designs.

Mr. Andrews's advice was, however, what kept me sane as I stressed about the future. I had told him about my growing interest in studying psychology, and though he looked pleased with the news, he had said, "That's great. Don't feel pressured, though, to have it all figured out today... or even this year. Take your time."

He had given me the email of the admission office of a university he recommended. I had applied without thinking they would even consider me but a representative had emailed me back and scheduled an interview for next week.

I was stressing about the interview when the sound of footsteps startled me.

Sitting up, I saw Arson's form walk into the living room. I blinked to adjust my vision to the lights in the room.

"You're going to have to stop popping in unannounced," I told him.

He shrugged. "It's not my fault your dad keeps letting me in."

"What are you doing here?" I rubbed my fingers over my eyes, trying to scare the sleepiness away.

"Well, you know, the usual. It's not like this is our last day together and I'm moving away tomorrow or anything... oh, wait! Yeah, that's exactly what's happening today."

What sucked about Ohio State was that it cared way too much about sports. The newly-recruited players were required to move in early for extra practice and to start getting to know the rest of the team or whatever.

"Okay, but what does that have to do with me?" I stood up and stretched my arms.

"So, you don't want to do anything before I leave? I thought..." He trailed off, leaving his sentence unfinished.

"Did you want to do something special today?" I asked without looking up.

From the corner of my eyes, I saw his face fall, but he shrugged it off.

"No, I guess not," he mumbled and shoved his hands in his pockets. "I'll leave now," he said, walking away, visibly trying his best not to look affected.

I knew he would be back, especially since I heard the front door open again shortly after he closed it. But it had given me just enough time to text Brooklyn and update her on our plan.

"I declare this mission officially launched" was her reply, along with a string of unnecessary exclamation points.

I had never organized a surprise party before, so Brooklyn gave me what she claimed was the most straightforward job—keeping Arson away from the house.

"Okay, fine," Arson said when he walked into the living room for the second time. "I'll admit it. I wanted to hang out with you before I left since I may not get the chance for a while. So, let's do something together."

I smiled at how predictable he was. "Okay, let's do it."

I followed him outside, and we climbed into his car. I tried to keep myself from glancing at the backseat because of the suitcases I knew I would find there.

"Do you have any place in mind?" he asked as he pulled out of the driveway.

"I don't know. Wherever you want." Before he could say anything, I added, "It's your day, Arson, and possibly the last time we get to hang out like this in a long time. So, we'll do whatever you want."

"I didn't think you cared," he said. "It didn't sound like you did, earlier."

"It's you. Of course, I care."

He laughed at my response, though I had been very serious. We soon pulled up on the side of the road next to a small park just outside my neighborhood. The only thing it contained was a basketball hoop, and that was likely all that Arson cared about.

He turned around and leaned back to reach the backseat to grab a ball.

"You're kidding," I said as he climbed out of the car.

"You said we'd do anything I wanted." He waved for me to get out of the car too, and follow him. "You know—" we walked past the metal gate onto the court— "it was only after I couldn't play anymore that I realized just how much I love this sport."

He dribbled the ball, focusing on the ball as it hit the marked pavement and his palm alternatively. "It's crazy. I feel it all now, and I realize that I used to take it for granted. It's like this with just about everything, isn't it? We never, you know, realize what something means to us until it's out of reach."

I couldn't help but think that this also applied to him right now, unfortunately. I had gotten so used to our friendship that it had been easy to consider it a given. Now that he was leaving, I seemed to notice all the features of his face. His teasing smile, his laugh that revealed his natural vampire teeth, his pale eyebrows that seemed to disappear completely at times. As if I was trying to etch in my mind a detailed image of him.

"Don't worry, you're never getting rid of me, Ava," he said as if he read my thoughts. "Now, come on, get the ball from me."

I knew I stood no chance against him, but I humored him and played along.

"Now, here's a cool trick," he said after kindly pretending that I had managed to get the ball from him.

"Do you really expect me to get this right?" I asked, watching him swiftly dribble the ball behind his back and spin around with it, as though the basketball court was a ballroom.

"Well, something for you to practice until I come back. This trick always works on Matthew." Then he winked, and my eyes narrowed at him.

"Okay, stop it with the winks. You know we're only friends."

"For now," he said, whistling to himself as he tossed the ball right into the hoop.

I managed to tear Arson away from the court when Brooklyn finally texted me that everything was ready. It had been no small feat since he clearly could play for hours.

"What's with all the cars?" Arson asked when we reached my house, parking on the side of the road since there was not one spot left in the driveway.

"I don't know." I shrugged, trying to come up with a good lie on command as we weaved between the cars to reach the door. "Must be Dad's board-game buddies."

Arson nodded without giving it a second thought and opened the door. Bright green and silver decorations greeted us inside, and I watched Arson's eyes widen when he recognized the smiling faces that welcomed him.

Nothing screamed nostalgia louder than school-spirit colors.

"Board game buddies? Really?" He laughed and shook his head. "Guys, you didn't have to do this," he said as he walked towards the cluster of people standing under a banner with his name written on it in calligraphy.

"We're going to miss you, buddy," I heard Matthew say to Arson, and they fist-bumped.

Matthew's green hoodie covered him like a cloak. Even as he spoke with animation to the other guys, I knew he was anxious. He had agreed to meet his dad after he had spent a month at the detox center.

Brooklyn passed by us, briefly turning to say, "I'll be in the kitchen eating if anybody needs me. This whole planning thing has stressed me out."

➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷

"Thank you," Arson said, much later that day, leaning beside me against the wall after everyone else had left. "It means a lot to me that you would take the time to plan all this."

"I had some help," I told him. "Especially from your girlfriend." I gave him a mocking grin, and he shook his head though I caught the hint of a smile on his lips.

"She's not my girlfriend. We're dating," he emphasized the word. "And what with me leaving tomorrow, I'm not sure what we are."

"It'll be under eight hours away. If anyone can make it work, it's you. Your dedication—" I pointed toward his right wrist—"is something else."

He smiled. "You're right. It would be silly not to try. I know we'll see each other again soon, but I'll miss you, Ava."

Without a word, I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him. He froze for a second before he realized what was happening and hugged me back.

"Is that an actual hug, Avery Taylor?" He nearly lifted me off the floor in his embrace. "You must really love me," he joked.

"You know I do."

"Stop it. You're going soft on me," he said as I pulled away.

"How's that?" I lightly punched his chest.

He grunted and brought his hands to his heart. "You're killing me. That strength! Have you been working out?" he asked, playfully examining my arms.

I knew it had to be a joke because I knew I looked my worst. One month of intense studying, overseen by Henry and Jayce, had reduced me to a skeleton of myself, but I couldn't complain. It was my fault for having to learn a year-worth of material in a month.

"I hope being away from home will help you grow up."

"What's the rush? You love me like I am." He wrapped his arm around my neck in a headlock, and I tried to wiggle out of his hold.

"Let go of me," I said. "I take it back, I don't love you. Go find Brooklyn and maybe you'll still be alive to take your flight."

He grinned. "Fine, I'm leaving, but you better call me every day," he said, retreating backward, still facing me.

"Hard pass." I laughed when he knocked his head against the front door, and he scowled as he walked away.

I knew we wouldn't talk every day, maybe not even every week. But we were friends. And it wasn't the kind of friendship distance could hurt.

As I thought of friendship, I thought of Avan, who had left Arson's party early to pack. He had wrestled with his parents' offer the weeks before graduation, and I hadn't been able to find any argument to help.

But now, I knew what I had to do, and Riley's portrait, staring back at me from above the fireplace, seemed to agree.

➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷➷

Elena seemed particularly glad to see me when she opened the door. She didn't ask me any questions. She stepped away from the door and gestured towards the staircase.

When I reached Avan's ajar door and knocked, I didn't think twice before entering. I found him sitting on his bed with his suitcase next to him and clothes in his hand.

"Listen," I instantly began, not bothering to wait for a response. "I know you think you need to leave, but I don't think you should. I understand why you— I know you feel like you don't know yourself, who you are without her."

Running up the stairs had caused me to run out of breath, and talking didn't help, but I had a case to debate, so I continued. "But I don't think you need to go anywhere to find you. This is your home, and that's the only place you'll find anyone who knows you. We can help you figure it out... I can, you know, as friends, of course."

Only then did I notice he had held a hand up to interrupt my rant.

"Avery," he said with an amused smile that confused me. "I'm unpacking," he explained and I finally noticed that he had been taking clothes out of his suitcase. "I changed my mind. I'm not going anywhere any time soon."

"Oh." A laugh slipped past my lips. As usual, I had spoken too fast, and maybe that should have taught me something, but I knew it wouldn't be the last time that I would make a fool of myself.

Avan laughed too, and a glimmer settled in his dark eyes, lighting up the rest of his face the way Riley used to describe it.

"Friends?" he asked, and I smiled.

"I like the sound of that."

"Do you need a ride home?" he asked, standing up and polishing the clothes he was wearing.

"No, actually. I brought my car."

He didn't reply, but a proud smile appeared on his face that made me grin in return.

When I returned to my car and sat behind the driver's seat, I felt the same rush I felt earlier when I had first climbed in it. The rush that I wasn't stuck on the passenger's seat. I knew I couldn't control everything. In fact, most things were completely out of my control.

Confronting the truth that my control was limited had felt like I was losing grip of the single thread of sanity I was holding on to. But there were a few things that still were, and I would hold on to them.

My phone vibrated next to me, and I reached over to the passenger's seat to grab it. I glanced at the screen, and the name Prince Humperdinck brought a smile to my lips.

"I didn't expect you to answer," Matthew said as soon as I picked up.

"I got to admit that I didn't want to," I joked. "But I wanted to ask how everything went with you and your dad."

"I'll tell you everything. Maybe tomorrow? How would you feel about babysitting with me? You know, because Marveen's been dying to see you again."

"No jackets?" I asked, and I heard a smile in his tone when he replied.

I knew we were done hiding.

"No jackets."

As I glanced at the backseat through the rearview mirror, I pictured Riley winking at me, a wistful smile on her lips. "All grown up."

➷THE END➷

A/N: Thank you so much for reading!

Thankful for all of you who stuck with this book until the end.

I've wanted to bang my head on my desk so many times while writing this book, but I just realized that I'm actually sort of proud of it.

Now I'll go and re-watch The Princess Bride and you all should too! It's a pleasant rollercoaster.

-D.T. ➷