(A/N Hey look! Lord of the Puppies!")

Ugh...
My head is killing me....

Jenrail's eyes flickered open and she was immediately blinded by sunlight. She quinted and shielded her eyes with her hand.

What happened?

She sat up and looked around. She was in a grassy clearing and suddenly Es appeared in front of her.

"AHHH!"
Both hobbits screamed and jumped away from each other.
"For the love of all things pizza Jenrail why are you going around giving people heart attacks?!"

Before Jenrail could explain herself another voice shouted, "Es?! Are you here too?!"
"Merry!"

Es scrambled to her feet and Jenrail followed. "Thank goodness! The Hobbit Squad is all here!"
Es exclaimed in relief.

"Almost everyone, Pippin isn't here."
Merry sighed dejectedly and Frodo gave him a sympathetic pat on the shoulder.

My inner reader: Wait- how did Frodo get here? He wasn't on the list.

Me: He got caught in the blast. Now are you going to be quiet and let me finish or what?

My inner reader: Yes...

"Pippin and I haven't hung out in weeks, it's weird not having my sidekick around."

"I know the feeling. When my sidekick wasn't around I got stung by a spider, carried off into an orc tower, and someone took my favorite t-shirt."
Frodo said staring forlornly into the distance.
"I loved that t-shirt."

"You mean the one that said, Unicorns are real and I am their king?"
Sam asked scratching the back of his head awkwardly.
"Because if it was I think those orcs did you a favor."

"THAT T-SHIRT WAS A GIFT FROM MY GRANDMA!!!!!!!"

"Um guys? Shouldn't we find out where ThunderPuff zapped us to?"
Jenrail suggested quietly.

"I agree."
Es said nodding.
"Let's go see if there's anyone else here besides us."

They didn't have to look far because as soon as they turned around every other person who had gotten zapped was standing together in a group.

"That was easy."
Frodo led the hobbits towards the others who all appeared to be crowded by something-wait-someone.

"What's going on guys?"
Sam asked.

The group consisted of Aragorn, Lindir, Elena, Ithilwen, Phoenix, and finally Piper, Pely, and Arvanlyn who got caught in the blast as well as Frodo.

"He's not breathing!"
Aragorn shouted.
"What?"
Frodo asked.
"Who?"
Jenrail added.

"Legolas!"
Elena and Ithilwen said at the same time and both proceeded to glare at each other.

"I've tried to everything to get him up but nothing's working!"
Aragorn explained beginning to panic.
"And I'm supposed to be the one with medical training!"

Es sighed and pushed her way to the middle of the group.
"I just knew that this would happen. Classic Legolas Angst, very common in LOTR fanfics."

"You lost me there Es."
Phoenix spoke for everyone in that moment.

"Nevermind. Obviously for some reason Legolas was affected by ThunderPuff's laser differently than we were."

Es inspected the unconcious elf for a moment.
"I should be able to revive him, but it has to be very suspenseful and show the true meaning of friendship between an elf and a mortal."

"Please stop doing Fifth Wall thing Es and help him."
Frodo groaned.

"Right. Hang tight everyone, I'm only going to get one shot at this. So here I go, CUE THE FEELZ!!!"

The mood got very serious, dark, and depressing. Suddenly it became overcast and everyone seemed to have tears in his or her eyes.

Es knelt down beside Legolas, gently, slowly, sadly, dramatically, something elsely.

All was a silent for a moment as everyone gazed sorrowfully at the nearly dead elf they all cared about so much.

Es took a deep breath, stood up again, and without warning slammed her foot against Legolas' chest.

"Es what are you doing?!"
Merry shouted.

"Don't worry I got this!"
She slammed her foot down again but there was no sign of Legolas waking.

"DON'T YOU DIE ON ME ELF!!!"

This time Es jumped completely onto Legolas' chest, over and over and over and over again.

Hobbit's may be light on their feet, but when it comes to them jumping as hard as they can onto something (in this case someone) it can hurt.

Alot.

"What on earth are you trying to accomplish with this?!"
Piper was now certain that Es had lost her mind.

"CPR!"
"THAT IS NOT CPR!"
Aragorn shouted.

"You're going to kill him!"
Phoenix added.
"And then my dad's going to kill me!"

"I'm not going to kill him! But I do agree that this is not the most affective thing!"

Es ceased her jumping to everyone else's relief before deciding on another tactic.

Two of those shocky things that people use to shock people back into awareness appeared in Es' hands.

She rubbed them togethe and yelled, "CLEAR!"
And slammed them both much harder than necessary onto Legolas' chest again.

Still nothing.

"Just face it he's gone!"
Arvanlyn snapped at everyone.
"No he's not! Don't say that."
Pely smacked her on the arm.

Es suddenly got a brilliant idea. She tossed the shockers aside and whispered into Legolas' ear, "THE FANGIRLS ARE COMING!!!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!"

Legolas gasped and shot right up and started screaming in terror.
"Wow. She actually did it."
Lindir commented.
"I personally didn't think that she would."

Meanwhile Es was trying to assure Legolas that there were no fangirls and that she had only said it to save his life.

"Wait a minute- I almost died?! That never happens to me."
Legolas' comment made a few people cough awkwardly.

"Yeah, and I saved your life."
Es stood up and dusted her hands off on her pants.
"You did?"
Legolas asked in amazement.

"Um yeah? You're lucky that I became a level seven Fourth Wall Breaker or you would have been a goner."

Everyone was ready to forget about what had just happened when the most horrifying thing of all happened.

That is if you happened to be Esmerelda, because if this happened to two certain elleths or any Legolas fangirl, they would be absolutely ecstatic.

But when Legolas hugged Es to show his gratitude she went completely crazy.

"You saved my life! I almost died and you saved me! How could I ever thank you?"

"BY GETTING OUT OF MY PERSONAL SPACE!!!!"
Es shouted still being held captive by (in her opinion) a crazed elf.

"Oh sorry Es."
Legolas released her and she smacked him on the shoulder as she stood up.
"Fistbumps. I've told you a million times I only accept fistbumps."

"Right right I'm sorry, it's just that I almost died, and you saved my life, I've always liked hanging out with you, you're really sweet, you make me laugh, everyone is staring at me, and I'm just going to stop talking now."

Everyone's eyes were practically popping out of their sockets. Phoenix faked coughed really loud, Ithilwen and Elena's faces were completely red and their hands were clenched into fists, Merry's left eye was twitching, and Es' face was completely expressionless.

"Um..."
Legolas stood shakily onto his feet and nervously backed away.
"I'm uh, just going to, stand
over-"

Legolas broke into a frantic run but didn't notice Arvanlyn stick her foot out until he tripped and face planted.

"Legolas Thranduilion what exactly are you trying to imply here?"
Aragorn demanded.
"Uh..."

That was when three lightbulbs flickered on over the heads of Frodo, Sam, and Merry.

They all gasped in shock.

"It all makes sense now!"
Frodo exclaimed ignoring Legolas frantically signaling for him to be quiet.

"The secret crush, not telling anyone who it was, being suddenly nervous around Es-"

"FRODO DON'T YOU DARE!"
Legolas lunged towards him but Aragorn and Phoenix held him back.

"This is the best moment of my life."
Phoenix sighed in contentment as Legolas thrashed and struggled like crazy to get to Frodo and stop him from saying-

"OH MY GANDALF! LEGOLAS HAS A CRUSH ON ESMERELDA!!!"

It became so quiet you could hear a cotton ball drop onto a field of grass.

No one moved, no one blinked, and a certain fanfic author began banging her head on her phone and wondering why she even considered this idea.

(A/N I mean it when I say this wasn't my idea!)

Everyone was completely shocked, and very uncomfortable with the situation.

Es however, showed absolutely no emotion whatsoever as she stared blankly in front of her.

"Hey Es? You alright in there?"
Merry asked snapping his fingers in front of her face a couple of times.

No response.

Finally she closed her eyes, took in a deep breath, reopened her eyes, and turned to Legolas.

"Is it true?"
She asked calmly.
Legolas hesitated for a moment.
"Bro, you're in too deep to back out now."
Phoenix said still enjoying the moment immensely.

Es was still waiting for an answer when Legolas sucked it up and nodded his head.

"Yes, it's true. I've like you for about a month now, but I was too scared to tell you how I felt. I was afraid about how you would react, instead I told you that I had crush on someone and I'd hoped that I'd eventually have the courage to tell you."

More silence.

Es blinked once, twice, and then quietly she asked him.
"So basically you were you asking me to help you win my own heart?"

Legolas nodded, unsure of where this was going.

"Well Leggy, do you know what I think?"

Another pause.....

"I THINK THAT I'M GOING TO CLOBBER YOU!!!!"

Now Es had to be held back by Merry and Frodo while Aragorn and Phoenix hid behind Legolas.

"Really Legolas, a hobbit? And Esmerelda of all hobbits? What were you thinking?!"
Aragorn smacked him on the back of the head.

"I honestly don't know. It just happened Aragorn, it was completely out of my control."

While Es continued to rage monster Jenrail began to really inspect the clearing they were in.

"Hey guys? You might want to look at this."

Es stopped raging and everyone followed Jenrai's gaze.

"What is this?"
Arvanlyn asked staring dumbfounded at Jenrail's discovery.

Surrounding the flat grassy area and towering over them were huge, gigantic walls that formed a perfect square around them.

There were four massive doors that led into what could only be described as a massive maze.

The time has come for the last and final crossover.

LOTR has just met The Maze Runner.

****

THE THING WITH LEGOLAS AND ESMERELDA WAS NOT MY IDEA!

I was given the suggestion by stringslady and I decided to use it just to see what happened.

Obviously it didn't work out so well for Legolas.

And yes, ThunderPuff sent them to the Maze.

And another yes, this story is reaching its end soon.

Alright I'm Out.