H A R P E R

Ever since I was a kid, I loved to dress up. Not dressing up in costumes, although I liked that too, but I mean, put on my best clothes and put on makeup and fix up my hair and look good. And I loved to dress up for myself. I genuinely enjoyed looking at myself in the mirror and liking my reflection. I did bring enough suitcases worth of clothes with me to New York, so I have no reason not to dress up. Except for the fact that I simply do not want to.

It was Friday night, I was in my room by myself and I had just taken a shower and had dinner, so my pink pajamas would have to do.

Wyatt had sent a text letting me know he'd be here around nine, so that would give me forty five minutes, give or take, that I would spend reading. However, before I could pick up my book, Zoey called.

"Hi Zo." I greeted her after picking up the phone.

"Hey you." I could picture her smile from the other side of the line. "How was this week?"

"Pretty much the same as every other week here." I shrugged before laying down on the bed, my hand still holding the phone against my ear. "What about you?"

"Please!" Her tone gave off exasperated vibes. "Like anything new happens here."

Zoey did sound a bit more... alert. Maybe alert is not the right word, but she sounded like she had been given a new soul, like her body had been rebooted. She sounded like she had more energy, and I have been noticing this since she started the clinical trial, so that must mean it's going well.

"You're right." I chuckled. "How's Noah and Ben? Have they visited you?"

"They're coming here next weekend."

A wave of sadness washed over me. "I wish I could be there. I wanted to see them."

"I know. But we can always facetime you then."

"Thanks." I said. What else would I have said? "Hey look, I gotta go. Wyatt's supposed to come here soon."

"Due tell!"

"Stop it, Zo!" I giggled while I rolled around, my chest now against the mattress. "It's not like that. He's coming over to study."

"Is that code for-"

I had to stop her right there. "That's not code for anything. We're studying."

"If you say so."

I rolled my eyes before saying goodbye to her and then hanging up the phone.

I got to read a couple of chapters of the book I was currently reading before I heard a knock on my door. I put the book down and made my way out of bed to open the door to Wyatt.

"Hi!" He greeted me with a wide, bright smile. He was definitely looking too happy for someone who was going to spend their Friday night studying.

"Hey. Welcome to my palace."

I slid to the side while opening the door a bit wider, allowing him more space so he could walk inside my room. He had his hands full with a large pink, cardboard box of what I could only assume was the donuts we'd agreed to.

"Thanks." He showed me a crooked smile. "Where can I put this?"

"Over there on the desk." I instructed while I closed the front door.

My desk wasn't too big and in all fairness, I only had one chair, so we wouldn't be using that tonight.

"How many donuts did you bring?" I questioned out loud while I carefully inspected the box that laid on the desk and that smelled sweet.

"Twelve." He said it like he was proud of himself for getting that many. Wyatt removed the straps of his backpack from around his shoulders and put his bag on the floor by his feet.

"You didn't forget about tonight, did you?" I found Wyatt's eyes eying me up and down, noticing my clothes. It's not like Wyatt was wearing anything too fancy, he literally just had on some jeans and a t-shirt.

"Oh no." I smothered a chuckle. "I was expecting you."

"Okay, good." He put his hands on either side of his waist and showed me a small smile.

I could sense an awkward moment approaching and before it would happen, I made my way to bed, taking my laptop with me. Following my moves, he grabbed his own from inside the backpack and took a seat next to me.

"Alright... I was thinking that we could start with Contemporary Civilization." Wyatt started. "I am taking an advanced class, 'cause it's a part of the curriculum for Human Rights and Mr. Hendricks teaches both classes."

"Okay." I was gonna let him lead tonight's study session, since he clearly knew more about Contemporary Civilization than me. I opened the document I had from class and sat back, ready to start typing whatever he'd tell me.

A couple of pages of notes later, and after bringing the donuts box to bed, Wyatt and I were more like brainstorming about the themes instead of memorizing facts. Turns out, this subject is far more interesting than I'd given it credit for after the first class.

"You know, for a freshman, this class might actually seem very basic. It's part of the core curriculum so it's taught to everyone in their first year, and it only grazes the surface of a much larger subject."

I could tell he wasn't finished, but paused. His brown eyes lit up as they searched the computer screen for a document he then opened.

"But this was actually the class that changed something for me. Or in me."

"How so?"

"I've always been aware of the privilege that I was born with, you know that. But actually studying about communities and the pressing issues they're facing, whether it's politics, religion, social, moral or all of them, and learning in great detail about all the basic stuff we have and take for granted... It made me want to pursue it. Dig deeper."

"I can see that." I nodded my head while showing him a faint smile. "You're a good guy, Wyatt."

"Thanks." He replied, quickly, before proceeding to stare at me in silence. I could tell he wanted to say something, but wasn't sure how to. "But I can't take all the credit. Having grown up with a younger sister has opened my eyes to a lot of issues that I probably wouldn't have even bothered to think about."

"I don't believe that." I picked up a chocolate covered donut and took a bite. "You can't say Chloé's the one responsible for you being this person. You should give yourself more credit than that."

"I appreciate it, but I feel like there is a lot I wouldn't be aware of if I hadn't grown up with a sister. Women's rights in society, in healthcare, in the job market... It's such a bigger deal than what most people think."

He was absolutely right, and I nodded my head in agreement, but remained silent.

Tonight was reminding me a lot of our first night together. It took me right back to New Year's Eve, when I met Wyatt, and when he explained to me why he chose Human Rights as his major. When I learned his passion for changing the world and making it a better place.

We had an instant connection that night, but this beautiful, selfless, kind side of him, this was what made me love him and yet what stopped me from pursuing that feeling.

And part of me hated that after all this time, that was still who he was. And I hated myself for thinking like this.

* * *

author's note

oh my god! my heart is breaking for harper and for wyatt, and for the two of them altogether 💔 but don't you worry, because you'll start to put the pieces of this puzzle together very very soon with some special chapters!

question: do you prefer to study alone or with a partner?

if you're enjoying LEOYAM, please don't forget to vote, and consider leaving a comment with your thoughts! also follow me on ig - missmarswrites - for sneak peeks, edits, quizzes and so so much more!

xoxo, mars