As I was about to touch my lips to his, I realised what I was doing. 

I would wreck our whole friendship. 

I froze and leant back, seeing confusion light up Alec's face. 

I closed my eyes, enjoying his hands on my waist for one last moment, and turned to swim away. 

Alec's hands slowly released my waist, as I swam toward the pier. 

The best thing about the pier, was that there were beams underneath that you could sit on, without anyone seeing you. 

I looked out toward to horizon and the slowly setting sun.

What was I thinking?

I had nearly kissed Alec. Again! I didn’t know what to make of it! Could he like me? Or was he just being sympathetic toward me?

But he loved someone else, and he knew that I knew that he loved someone else. 

I was so confused. 

The thoughts kept spinning around in my head, and they needed to stop. 

I did one of the only things that calm me down when I was over thinking, I sang. 

I was halfway through 'Feels Good At First' when I heard someone swimming toward the pier. 

I knew who it would be, as she was the only other person that knew about my spot. 

Bronte.

"Tam! I know you're here!" She called from the opposite end to where I was sitting. 

"Over here," I called back, and she ran toward me on the beam, almost slipping into the water. 

"What the hell?" She asked when she had reached me, sitting down to face me while I was still facing the ocean. 

"What do you mean 'what the hell'?" I asked, still not looking at her. 

"I mean why did you swim off? Alec came back to the beach and wouldn't talk to anyone but Mase. Then you swim off and no one can find you, except for me, the genius that I am. What the hell happened Tam???" Bronte ranted, and I sighed. 

"I nearly kissed him. I was sick of pretending that I don't love him, and I didn't want to pretend anymore. But as soon as I was about to kiss him, I realized how stupid I was and swam away..." I explained, my voice just above a whisper. 

"HOLY SHIT! YOU NEARLY KISSED HIM? WHY DIDN'T YOU, YOU MORON???" Bronte shouted, shoving my shoulder with her hand.

"I didn't because it would screw up our whole friendship, and our friendship isn't strong enough for him to know that I love him without not being friends. I don't know. I'm not making sense..." I trailed, sighing. 

"Oh my god, Tam. Are you freaking blind?! How can you not see that he loves you? He basically stares at you all lunch when you aren't looking, and in English. But he's too scared to tell you," Bronte ranted again, and I so badly wanted to believe what she was saying. 

"Bronte, I don't want to get my hopes up. If I really did believe that he liked me, and he didn't... It would be so painful," I whispered the last words, trying to keeps the tears from spilling. 

"Tamsin Royce!" She shouted at me, hitting my arm. 

"What the hell was that for??" I exclaimed, rubbing my arm where she hit me. 

"What else do you want me to do?! You won't believe me when I tell you that I am 99.9% sure that he is in love with you. You won't believe for a second that he could actually geniunely like you. What else am I supposed to do? I don't understand how you can figure out everyone else's problems but your own! You are so observant when it comes to other people, but completely blind when it comes to you!" Bronte sighed and looked away. 

"False hope Bronte. That is all I have to say." I replied, a tear escaping my eye. 

"What the hell has screwed you up so much that you can't believe that someone could actually love you?" She questioned, staring at me with an expression on her face mixed with anger and concern. 

"My mom..." I trailed, letting the tears flow freely now. 

"Tam..." Bronte whispered, putting her arm over my shoulder. 

"It doesn't matter. Nothing matters! It's all freaking pointless!" I almost screamed, shrugging her arm off, getting to my feet and diving into the water.

I swam back to shore, my arms pumping, tears mixing with the salt water. 

When I could touch the bottom, I walked out slowly. 

I avoided the picnic area and went straight to Dahlia's car. I got my towel and my clothes, and went to sit on the hill that looked over the picnic area. 

The best thing about this spot was that you could see everything and no one could see you. 

I wrapped my towel around myself and put my head in my hands, that were on my knees. 

I sat on the hill, looking over my friends until the sun had almost completely dissapeared behind the horizon. 

"Hey," a voice behind me said, making me jump. 

I turned to face Alec, standing a few feet behind me wearing shorts and a tight fitting black t-shirt which perfectly emphasized his muscles. 

"Hey," I replied, still looking at him. 

He walked over to sit beside me, but hesitated. 

"Do you mind?" He asked, looking concerned. 

I laughed. 

"No, I don't," I replied, smiling as he sat down. 

We sat in silence for a minute, looking out over our friends. 

"I'm sorry about before..." Alec trailed, his gaze going from his feet, to the ocean, to our friends; anywhere but me. 

"No, don't be. I should be the one saying sorry..." I trailed, looking at the side of his face. 

He just laughed, finally looking at me, into my eyes. 

I felt like I was floating on clouds as he looked at me. It was the best feeling in the world. 

We sat like that until everyone started packing up below us. 

Alec got up reluctantly and put his hand out to help me up. 

He didn't let go of my hand as we walked down the hill toward the cars, and I was not complaining. 

Everyone was getting into their cars, pretending to not notice us. 

I turned to look at Alec, who had a strange expression on his face. 

"Well, I guess I'll see you later..." I  trailed, looking into his eyes one last time. 

"Yeah, goodnight Tamsin," he whispered softly, then hugged me. 

I was so greatful for that hug, it felt so right to be in his arms that I never wanted him to let go. 

But he did, and we went out separate ways, to our separate homes, to our separate beds, to our separate dreams.