Ichimatsu sat down in front of the toilet and began to puke insanely. He hadn't noticed how nauseated he was until he was in the bathroom.

He was vomiting nothing but stomach acid. He hadn't eaten in forever, but he didn't care. He loved the constant pain over his entire body each day. Ichimatsu was to the point now where he couldn't remember a single day in his life without pain.

After several minutes of throwing up, Ichimatsu choked loudly as he stood up, looking at himself in the mirror.

"What am I even..." he spat, "Disgusting filth. Trash that doesn't deserve to be alive."

Ichimatsu rolled up the sleeves to his purple hoodie, staring at the scars on his arms. There wasn't a single spot that didn't have a cut mark.

He reached for a razor blade, looking back at himself in the mirror, then back down at his arms. And without a second thought, Ichimatsu dragged the blade across his arm, digging it into his skin. He didn't care how deep or long the cut would be in a few moments. It felt so good. All the pain that he was keeping inside began to pour down his left arm in gushes of blood.

"Oh crap..." Ichimatsu said, trying not to sound like he was hurting. "I didn't hit a vein...did I?"

Quickly grabbing a washcloth, he put the cloth on top of his arm and ran it under water at the bathroom sink.

The bleeding wouldn't stop. Ichimatsu's entire arm began to throb in pain. He hadn't felt this bad in a very long time. "Screw it..." he spat, desperately trying to stop the bleeding.

And all of the sudden, out of nowhere, Ichimatsu heard the last voice in the entire world that he wanted to hear.

"Muscle muscle! Hustle hustle!" Jyushimatsu yelled, running into the house. "Ichimatsu niisan! Where are you!"

Ichimatsu held his breath and locked the bathroom door as quickly as he could.

"Get away!" Ichimatsu wanted to scream at his brother.

"Ichimatsu?" Jyushimatsu called loudly once again in his cheerful voice. "I want to talk to you!"

"Like heck I care..." Ichimatsu said accidentally. Jyushimatsu suddenly grew very quiet.

"Are you in here, Ichimatsu?" he asked, knocking obnoxiously on the bathroom door.

"GO AWAY!" Ichimatsu yelled. He hadn't meant to yell at the one brother who cared to talk to him...but it just happened. The bleeding still wouldn't stop. He knew he couldn't stay in the bathroom forever, but he wasn't going to let Jyushimatsu, of all people, see his arms.