title : i just wanna make things better
oc / pairing : stuart johnston and dahlia
cazarez-eubank
trigger warnings : none

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HE'S STARING AT THE HALF EMPTY COFFEE MUG that taunts him at the kitchen table. Stuart couldn't seem to snap out of his thoughts. His eyes were starting to gain bags under them, his curly hair slightly disheveled and it looked deflated.

He can't believe this. He, a thirty-five year old lawyer was sitting across from a fifteen year old girl in all black and pigtails. It was almost embarrassing. But she was the only one allowed to know about their relationship. Well, now broken up relationship. And ever since, he wasn't able to function.

His coffee was a lighter brown in contrast to Dahlia's. Black. That's how she liked it. That was also how Clarence liked it. It makes Stuart push his own mug back before leaning back in his chair, as if he is trying to avoid it.

"Señor Johnston."

He slowly looked up in response to his name, though he said nothing. He doesn't know what to say. He wasn't really used to this. He hadn't been seen this way. The last time he did this way was when Angelina passed away. He didn't get out of his bed for weeks, and now it was the same cycle.

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine."

That was all Stuart could say. That's what he's trained to say if anyone asked. But he couldn't even smile or make it look convincing.

Dahlia put the coffee mug down. She could see that Stuart wasn't in his normal mindset. Although her face stoic and her hands held together on the table, she looks into the normally happy brown eyes that she associated with Stuart.

"I asked simply because of social training, Señor Johnston," Dahlia replied with her usual straightforwardness, "Tell me what is bothering you."

Stuart didn't even have to tell. She knew. She just wanted to hear it from him. She already knew Clarence's side, now she needed to know his.

The lawyer is dead silent. Not a word comes from his lips, even when he opens his mouth to try and say something. He couldn't say a word without tears coming from his eyes.

"I don't hate him ..." Stuart whispered, "I shouldn't have said I don't hate him. I didn't mean to say it, it just came out──"

"That is enough," Dahlia said. It's soft, but firm, "We have a way of not spilling the truth before it is too late. And we have ways of saying things that we don't mean when we are upset."

Stuart wiped his eyes, a deep breath escaping his lips. "The last thing I want is Clarence to think I hate him, because I don't. I love Clarence, but I don't love──"

"Being kept a secret," Dahlia finished.

Stuart nodded. "Yeah."

Dahlia hummed. She pulled her mug back to her, grabbing the handle of it. "I understand your point of view, pero I also understand the point of view of Señor Stevens," she explained, "Señor Stevens, he is ... he never had a support system. His familia other than his children are very hateful people."

"I know that," Stuart replied back, "I do, I know, it's just ... The one thing that I've always hated was secrecy."

"Some people live in secrecy. Señor Stevens has to unlearn a mindset that he was given from a younger age," she said, "It does not mean he doesn't love you, it means that knowing the information that he knows now, he is trying to digest it."

Stuart listened to her words. He finally wiped the tears rolling down his face. He felt horrible. He knew all of this about Clarence and yet he still made the fuss. He was still angry about it, and it might've chased him away.

"You, Señor Johnston, have a loving family who supports you for your identity," Dahlia told him, "Señor Stevens grew up with Christian hatred. Anyone who was different was sinful, therefore he had to hide."

Stuart sniffled. "He doesn't wanna talk to me," he whispered.

It is now dead silent. It almost makes Stuart break down. It had been a month since they had talked.

"Why do you say that?" Dahlia asked.

"He doesn't talk to me at the meetings," Stuart explained, "he goes out the way to avoid me."

The lawyer looked back at Dahlia. "I just wanna make things better between us," he told her, "I just wanna talk. I want to apologize for everything I've said."

Dahlia took another small sip from her coffee mug. "It's Señor Stevens. He will come around when he's ready," she said, "Just give him time."

Stuart could only give a nod. He looked back at his coffee mug that he had slid away from him before. He took a sip, scrunching up his nose before he put it back down. It's cold.

"Shit ... " he murmured.

── ♡ ( AUTHOR'S NOTE ! )

a little vent - ish drabble that's been in the works for god knows how long. dahlia belongs to my dear friend, tatum!