"Starbucks isn't ungodly in any way, is it?"

"Man, Spain lost a lot in a very short amount of time. In like, 15 years they lost Venezuela, Mexico, and like, pretty much all of the Western part of the United States."

"*about the closeness of the French Revolution and the American Revolution* WE'RE ALL BREAKING UP WITH YOU AT THE SAME TIME"

"Goatfeather Seafood." "Sounds like a chupacabra. Or a chimera? No, definitely a chupacabra."