“Did you and Savannah clear the air yet?” Owen asked as we both stood in the center of the paddock, with a horse on a longe line trotting around the perimeter as he waited for instructions. Owen gave the line several short squeezes and the horse began to slow to a walk. “She’s in the house if you want to go and talk to her.”

Since last week, I’ve tried to avoid Savannah as much as possible. After speaking with my mom I’d spent days working out what my feelings towards Savannah were, but the more I thought about it, the more my mind clouded. For once, Savannah gave me space and hadn’t approached me.

I missed her.

“I don’t think I’m ready to talk to her,” I say. I turn my attention back onto the chestnut horse, Kellogg, we’re training and avoid talking more about Savannah, but even then she wasn’t far from my mind. “What would I say, anyway? She hates me.”

Owen laughs. “Savvy doesn’t hate anyone, Caleb, especially you. For some reason Savvy likes you and is willing to turn a blind eye to your many, many flaws. All you have to do is say you’re sorry. Girls love it when guys apologize.”

“She likes me?” It was the only bit of Owen’s speech that I remembered and the only bit that was important. “What do you mean, she likes me?”

With a roll of his eyes, Owen ignored my question and went back to training Kellogg. The horse’s owner was a wealthy kid that went to mine and Savannah’s school. His name was Parker Shaw and he was an obnoxious jerk that everyone seemed to love. He and Savannah were friends and having Kellogg at the stables was a favor to the Shaw family, but it also gave Parker a free pass to be up on the Estate.

A Range Rover pulled up the driveway and parked behind Savannah’s car, blocking her in. I stifled a laugh as I pictured the damage Savannah could do to his car if she needed to get out, but I didn’t warn Parker. Instead, I ignored his presence and continued training his horse.

Or at least, that’s what I was trying to do. Once I saw Savannah opening the door to Parker in her flowing floral dress, I couldn’t help but think about her. She never dressed up like that when I was around. In fact, around the Estate all I ever saw Savannah wear were riding breeches or jeans and flannel shirts plus her trusted boots. Her hair was never styled straight like it was right now for Parker. The Savannah that greeted Parker at the door wasn’t the one I know and lo-

Whoa, Caleb. The one you know and what?

“Talking to yourself again, Caleb?” Owen scoffs. I spun my head around to the sound of his voice and saw him smirking at me. “So, who’s the one you know and what?”

“Go to Hell, Owen,” I grumble as I walk away towards the stables.

“Living with you,” Owen yells after me, “I’m already there.”

I stayed in the stable barn for hours, tidying the hay storage. Ok, so it wasn’t really tidying, but more like moving all the bales from one side of the hay barn to the other, and then back again. Sherman came to check up on me a few times, but he just nodded his head in thought and then left me to my madness.

Whenever I needed to take my mind off things, I got obsessive about cleaning. After my father died in a DUI collision- he was the one under the influence- I cleaned our old house a hundred times over. By the end of that week, there wasn’t a single inch of that place that hadn’t seen a duster or polish. People thought it was weird, but it was my way of dealing and it was cheaper than the hours of therapy that I’d need to sort out my issues. So, yeah, when Caleb Townsend gets stressed, he cleans.

After rearranging and re-rearranging the hay barn, I set to work on polishing all the saddles that were in the tack room. I counted twenty-two saddles. The bridles came next. Then I organized all the spare tack that we had lying around in size order.

I should have been in my Zen zone by the time I was done in the tack room, but I wasn’t. I was so far away from being calm that I was starting to get angry again. Angry about mine and Savannah’s fight… Angry about Parker being in her house… Angry that she flat ironed her hair…

“Let’s think logically,” I tell myself. When I a rage began bubbling up inside me, I liked to rationalize out loud. I might look crazy to outsiders, but at least I was thinking with my head instead of my fists for once. “Savannah Mayfield. What are the pros and cons? Ok, there’s her annoying habit of being nice to everyone. Drives me insane because she’s just too frickin’ nice all the damned time.

“Then there’s her inability to drive. Seriously, she’d be dangerous on a pedal bike. Thank God she doesn’t drive a bus, or a stick shift. Could get really nasty. Maybe the only reasons she’s good on a horse is because the animal’s doing all the thinking. Oh, and she’s crazy if she thinks she can break Phantom.”

I pause to think more about Savannah’s bad qualities, but when none spring to mind, I decide to move on to her good point.

“She smells amazing, like vanilla. And her hair smells like coconut. She has amazing blue eyes that just shine when she’s happy. Plus, there’s her smile… all seven of them. The one she gives me is my favorite.

“She’s very polite. That can go under ‘pros’ too. The fact that she can’t drive is kinda funny because it’ll mean she’ll always rely on me to drive. And there’s nothing a guy likes more than being behind the wheel. She likes horses, thankfully, because at least then we’ll always have a fallback conversation filler.”

Anything else I haven’t covered?

“Right, there’s that too,” I click my fingers when a new idea comes to mind. “She’s constantly on my mind. She’s there in the morning, all through the day, and she’s there at night too. She’s always there.”

Ah, shit.

“What’s the verdict, then, kid?” Sherman asks from the tack room doorway. “Do you like her, or not?”

I ignore Sherman and push passed him as I made my way to the staff room. It was midafternoon and I hadn’t eaten all day. I could feel my stomach growling as I worked my way around the kitchenette, creating a tuna melt sandwich that I would devour in less than three seconds. I was still building the sandwich when I heard Savannah’s voice bidding Parker farewell. She stood in the doorway and waved at him as he drove away. Then she stole a glance at the stables and frowned.

I’m not sure why I ducked, but I did. It wasn’t as if Savannah could have seen me in the window, right?

I chowed down the tuna melt and decided that I was cool enough to face Owen again. He was still out in the training paddock, but instead of putting Kellogg through his paces, Owen had moved on to Ascot, a dun gelding that needed training for a client’s granddaughter. Ascot was well trained in ignoring people and never listened to anything anyone said, so Owen had been wasting his time for the last month. I was tempted to tell him, but I liked seeing Owen short circuiting over a challenge like Ascot.

I watched Owen shout at the horse, only for Ascot to trot around without a care in the world. I was still laughing when a loud alarm began screeching. Owen stopped what he was doing and shot me a concerned look, but I just shrugged the noise off.

Until it suddenly went quiet and the only sound was Savannah screaming from inside the house.

I rushed from the yard, took the porch steps in one quick leap and ran through the house until I found Savannah battling a fire in the kitchen. The room was filled with smoke and the detector started to sound again. Savannah just groaned and continued to beat the fire with a dish towel as she coughed and spluttered from smoke inhalation.

I ran forward, took the dish towels from her and carried the burning concoction to the sink. I turned on the cold water faucet and watched as the fire died down before heading for the French door and opening them to allow fresh air into the room. I walked back to Savannah and saw her eyes well up with unshed tears.

“Why are you crying?” I ask, shaking Savannah by the shoulders to get her to see clearer. She blinked and pointed at the smoking pan in the sink. I walked over to the offensive item and held it up now that it wasn’t on fire. “You’re crying over… what was this?”

Savannah wiped away the tear that was streaking down her wan face. “It was a cake.”

“A cake?” I double check and watch as Savannah blushes. “For who?”

“For you,” she almost whispers after a beat. “It’s your birthday tomorrow and I wanted to make you a cake. I lost track of time and kinda burnt it. Sorry.”

I look down at the burnt mixture and try to stifle a laugh. Taking another glance at Savannah, I see more tears snaking from her eyes and her lips quiver as she battles away her emotions. I throw the pan back into the sink and get to Savannah’s side in three long strides. I pull her into my arms and hug her to my body tightly.

It wasn’t hard to notice how comfortably she fitted against me, how her body molded against mine, or how my arms held her tightly against me. Savannah was tall, a good five-eight, but I was taller and she nestled perfectly into the crook of my armpit. Her head rested above my heart and I wondered if she could feel it thumping under her cheek.

God, I hope she couldn’t feel my heartbeat racing.

“Caleb?” She mumbles into my chest before beating a feeble fist against my chest. I mumble something like ‘huh’ into her hair as she beats me again. “I… can’t… breathe.”

I loosen my grip on her and let her get away from me, but strangely she doesn’t move. She nuzzles her nose against me and makes a contented sound, like she’s happy to be here, held in my embrace.

I suddenly become uncomfortable and take a step back from Savannah until she’s an arm’s length away from me. I smile weakly at her to show her that we’re still ok, but I can’t ignore the hurt that’s in her eyes.

“I’m not exactly a touchy-feely kinda guy,” I try for an explanation. Savannah nods grimly and turns to start clearing up. I take a hold of her wrist to stop her and sigh. “It’s not just with you, but with everyone. I mean, it Savannah, this is all on me. I’m not an emotional person and hugging is a little too… personal.”

She nods. “If you say so.”

She starts moving around the kitchen and starts putting away the ingredients that she’d used to make the burnt birthday cake. In swift movements, the counter clears and Savannah starts cleaning the pan, frantically scrubbing until every last charred crumb of batter is gone. She dries the pan quickly, stows it back in the cupboard and wipes down the counter one last time with a weary sigh.

“Now that you’re done,” I break the silence. “We need to talk.”

“If we were in a relationship,” she laughs bitterly, “that would mean we’re breaking up.”

“Then, I guess it’s a good thing we’re not in a relationship,” I say playfully, hoping that by keeping the conversation friendly, we might be able to resolve our- my- issues. “Why were you making me a birthday cake? My birthday isn’t until tomorrow.”

“I know when your birthday is, Caleb,” Savannah rolls her eyes at me. “I wanted to do something nice for you, that’s all. After last week… are we in a fight, Caleb? If we are, can we just call it quits already?”

I look at her expectant face and see the sadness that lies behind her eyes. Savannah used to be vibrant and every inch of her shone but now she looked like the light had gone out. I wondered just how much of that was my doing.

“We’re not in a fight, Savannah-

“Well, you could have fooled me,” Savannah cuts me off. There was a sharpness to her voice that was new and unexpected. “You’ve been ignoring me for a week now and it’s starting to annoy me. Like, really annoy me. I don’t know what I did wrong- Hell, I never know what I’ve done wrong when it comes to you- but whatever it was this time, can you just forgive me.”

“You think I’m angry with you?” I say slowly, just to see if I’m following her correctly. When she nods, I shake my head in disbelief. “Savannah, I am not angry with you.”

“Then why have you been ignoring me?” She shouts in frustration and the tears begin to flow again. “Just tell me what I did wrong.”

“Savannah-

“Tell me, damn it!”

“I like you!” I blurt out without thinking. My words take me by surprise, and they take Savannah by surprise too. I drop my head into my hands and groan. When I look up, I see Savannah sitting on the counter, watching me closely, as if she’s expecting more to the revelation. “Look, Savannah… what do you want me to say?”

“The truth would be good,” she answers.

“Fine,” I sigh and lean against the counter opposite her. I run my fingers through my overgrown dark hair to earn me some more thinking time, but I know that I’d have to speak sooner or later. “I like you but it’s really confusing me. I never used to think about you, but recently you’re all that’s been on my mind. Trust me, I don’t want to be thinking about you, because you hate me, but I do. I think about you a lot.”

Silence.

“Aren’t you going to say something?” I practically beg her after five minutes of no one speaking. “Come on, Savannah. I know you and I know that you’ve got something to say.”

She nods. “I do have something to say, but it’s not very lady like.” I laugh and motion for her to say it anyway. It’s not like it could surpass the cursing from the truck incident. “Holy fucking shitbags on fire.”

Or maybe it could beat the truck incident.

“Excuse me?” I laugh so hard it feels like I might die. “Savannah, that was… what was that?”

She shrugs. “Sorry,” a blush creeps onto her cheeks. “I didn’t know what else to say. Caleb Townsend, did you just tell me that you like me?”

I nod.

“Why? How? Since when?” All the questions come tumbling out in one long sentence and I’m not sure which one to answer first. I was just about to open my mouth when I heard Savannah’s voice again. “You hate me, Caleb. You don’t talk to me, you’re always making fun of me and how nice I am, and you can hardly stand to be in the same room as me. Are you being cruel?”

I blink up at her. “Cruel? You think this is a joke?” She nods warily. “I wish it were a joke because at least if it was a prank I wouldn’t be feeling like this.”

“Like what?” She wonders. “What does it feel like?”

I pause to think of my answer. I know how to explain it in my mind, but articulating it was going to be difficult. Like I told her, I wasn’t one of these touchy feely, emotional types and laying bare my feeling towards Savannah was probably the hardest thing I would ever have to do, but when she was looking at me all hopeful like she was right now, I knew I had to suck it up.

“It’s… you know when you’re asleep and suddenly you have this feeling like you’re falling?” I start, but I think I’ve already lost her. “It’s like that. Falling and you have no control over it and you can’t stop it. It’s terrifying because you know there’s this force acting on your body but you don’t know what it is, so you just keep falling and your heart is racing and your breathing becomes erratic… That’s what this is like, in a way, except about ten times worse.”

Savannah nods thoughtfully. “That must suck.”

I laugh. “Not really,” I find myself saying. “I actually like the sensation of falling.”

“Why?” Savannah snorts. She scrunches up her nose at the thought and my heart does that thing again where it misses a beat. “Like you said, the falling is terrifying.”

I step closer to her and place my hands down on the counter on either side of Savannah so that she can’t escape. My face meets hers and our eyes lock. I smirk at her, but she doesn’t move… she just stares. And stops breathing.

“It’s terrifying when you don’t know why you’re falling,” I whisper and watch as her skin reacts to my breath. “But I know why I’m falling. It’s because of you, Savannah, and for some reason that I’m still trying to understand, my heart and my head are telling me that this is ok. Better than ok, maybe. It’s pretty damn incredible, actually.”

“That was a heck of a speech,” Savannah smiles. “So, just for me to be clear- you don’t hate me?”

I shake my head. “I don’t hate you.”

“You like me?” She asks.

“Yes, ma’am,” I nod, before a smirk works its way to my lips. “I like you, Savannah.”