She has barely called me during these days. Sometimes, if I don’t text her first, I don’t get any sign from her and I know she told me to expect this from her, and Mila also told me a few days after Moni and I got together that she’s not the one who takes the first step. She’s the one that also has in mind ‘I don’t want to be a bother’, that’s why I insisted so much that if she ever needed me she couldn’t doubt on calling me. I want her to know she’ll never be a bother for me. However, that can’t be easy to accomplish, right?

I don’t need her to call me twice a day and to talk over the phone an hour, I know that’s not necessary, but sometimes a text from her would be nice, just to remind me that she’s thinking of me as well, because I think of her a lot. I miss her silly antics, I miss her laugh, I miss her ability to learn how to use something faster than I can unwrap it, I miss her obsession to read all the manuals even though she knows how to use the gadget, I miss her excitement over books I haven’t heard before, I miss the way she looks at me when she’s happy, I miss her pleading eyes when she doesn’t want to go out or move for what it matters. I miss her. That’s why I’m so excited to see her walking across those doors to me, with her joyful smile and her untamed hair floating behind her as she walks.

She arrives in America today so we can spend New Year’s together and I know one of her dreams is to spend that night in New York, so I’m taking her there. But first I need her with me. I shouldn’t be here waiting for her at the airport, I should be doing some promo in a local radio station, but I managed to change the schedule and do the show beforehand so I could be here as a surprise. She doesn’t know I’m here.

I see her plane has landed already and I can’t wait to see her again. Not talking so much with her during these past few days makes this moment even more exciting and when I see her I have to contain myself from grinning like a complete idiot. “Ed?” she questions when our eyes meet and I can see surprise in her dark orbs. “But I thought you– and I– How is that–?” she mumbles ever so confused and I don’t let her say anything else, I wrap my arms tightly around her waist and bring her close until I crush my lips against hers.

She doesn’t react at the beginning, surprise freezing her muscles, but soon she recovers and kisses me back, her arms looping around my neck as she lets her purse fall to the floor. “I missed you,” I tell her still brushing my lips against hers. “Surprise,” I add and she giggles ruffling my hair with her little hands.

“I missed you, too,” she tells me and hearing that makes me feel more assured. I can’t help wondering if she misses me the way I do when we are apart because she never mentions it unless I say it first. Cue to her words, I feel her arms tightening around me as she buries her face in the crook of my neck. “Very much,” she whispers and I bring her even closer, not wanting to let her go.

She does miss me when we’re not together, she’s just not comfortable enough to say all that she feels.

“Let’s go. I want you to tell me everything you did this week,” I tell her finally letting her go and taking her hand to walk with her.

“That won’t take much longer. Basically I just read, ate, slept and went to the toilet. Yup, that sums pretty much everything,” she answers and I laugh. For some reason, that doesn’t surprise me.

* * *

“This wasn’t necessary, Ed!” she tells me reproachfully, but I know she’s happy. Her eyes betray her tone.

“But I wanted to do it, so it was necessary,” I tell her kissing her check and she gives in with a smile.

“You’re crazy, you know that?”

“And that’s why you like me,” I tell and she answers with another fit of giggles. “C’mon, we need to find a good place to see the drop,” I tell her taking her hand so we can leave the taxi and join the crowd in Time Square.

I lead her making our way among all the people gathered to see the fall right at midnight when a new year is going to start. Since Moni got here two days ago we’ve tried to visit as many places as possible as this was her first time in America and she was really excited. Though, for some reason, we always ended up in a bookshop and she left with, at least, two new books. She also bought me a couple of books and made me promise that by the time I’d come back from this little tour, I had to have, at least, three books read.

I didn’t mind, I was happy spending time with her and if we could have something else to talk about later, as some books, even better. I loved seeing her so passionate about fictional stories and taking care of those books more than she takes care of herself.

We find a good place to see the fall when the countdown starts and I immediately bring her close wrapping my arms around her body, my chin on her shoulder and cheek-to-cheek. It’s really cold but that’s only an excuse to hug her. Truth be told, I love cuddling with her.

“I’ve always wanted to see this,” she tells me resting her weight carefully on me.

“I know, that’s why I brought you here.” She turns her head until she’s looking at me, her nose almost brushing mine, and she smiles. “I’m so glad you’re here,” I add and her smile grows wider.

“And I’m so happy to be here with you,” is her answer. “Thank you for bringing me here,” she says after that, her eyes are intense on me and I can see how sincere her words are.

“I wish you could stay longer.” It really sucks that the day after tomorrow she’s leaving again and I won’t see her again until I come back to London.

Her winter break will end soon and she’ll start with her last term in Uni and I know she’s going to be really busy, studying her arse off to get good grades and then a good job with Mila’s publishing house. I know she wants to be an editor and I’m sure she’ll be a good one, no, an excellent editor because I trust her and this is what she really wants. When Moni really tries, she can do amazing things.

“You’ll call me, right?” I ask her not being able to hide my insecurities. I try to remind myself all the time that she told me about this, the first day, but still, it’s hard.

“Of course I will, when you’re not busy,” she answers smiling, oblivious to how important this is for me.

“Forget about that. If you miss me, if you want to talk to me, just call me. Don’t mind the time or anything else. If I really can’t answer, I won’t, but at least I wanna know you tried to reach me. Please, Moni, promise me you won’t hold it back, that if you wanna call, text, tweet, whatever, you will do it,” I request looking intently into her eyes.

She doesn’t say anything for a while, she just looks me in the eyes and I know she’s having an inner argument with herself. I know she doesn’t want to bother, but I need her to accept that she will never be a bother.

“If I’m asking you this it’s because it’s important,” I explain so she can understand better how essential this whole situation is.

“Would you do it?” she asks instead of answering. “Would you call me anytime, not caring about what I might be doing?”

I stop and breathe slowly, pondering her answer before giving a reply. “If you tell me you want me to, I would. If you tell me you don’t mind me calling you even if you’re busy, I’d totally do it, because I believe you when you say you don’t care, that you want me to call you.”

She catches her breath but her eyes never leave me.

“Would you mind?” I ask her because maybe that’s what she needs, that’s the first step I need to take with her.

“You can call me whenever you want,” she answers in a whisper I barely hear. “I’ll always have time for you.”

“See? It’s the same for me. You can believe me when I say all these things to you, Moni. I want you to have that confidence with me, I want you to feel that comfortable being with me.” She looks at me and I can see the inner fight in her eyes and I also see the moment she takes a decision.

“I’ll try, Ed, but this is a habit really hard for me to break.” I nod because I know it’s not easy, that this problem in our relationship is not something we can overcome in a day, but at least I got her to promise she is going to try.

Suddenly and before I can say something else, people start shouting with the countdown and we both turn our heads to the big sphere ready to fall. I hug her tighter as we join the mass shouting the numbers.

“Five… Four… Three… Two… One! Happy New Year!” everyone scream at the top of their lungs and Moni turns in my arms to face me, a big smile and oh so many emotions in her dark eyes.

“Happy New Year,” she tells me and I don’t reply immediately, I wrap my arms even tighter around her and lean in until my lips are over hers, kissing her deeply.

Her arms are around my neck and I know she’s on her tiptoes and I’m helping her get higher, pulling her towards me and picking her feet up off of the floor as I deepen the kiss, not caring all the people around us. After all, they are doing the same.

We pull apart just to look into each other’s eyes, and just then I reply, “Happy New Year, Moni. Good luck in everything and may this year be better than the previous one.”

She smiles, her hand running through my hair, her eyes sparkling with deep emotions as she wears a lovely smile. “I have a good feeling that this will be a good year, Ed.”

I lean in to kiss her one more time. “I have the same feeling,” I say with my lips still brushing against hers. I really do believe this will be a great year. It’s starting as an excellent one already.

-:-:-:-

I hope you all liked it! It was nice to write. Dedication to Aimy for being my beta reader for this story!

Bel, xx