“Oh, you have to wear this and put your hair like this. I’m so excited for you,” Mila keeps telling me as she moves my hair for like the billionth time already. I slap her hand so she can finally leave me the fuck alone and let me breathe.

“Mila, honestly, calm down! I’m just going to a gig, it’s not a big deal. In fact, I don’t know why you’re not coming with me,” I tell her and her smile is still as humongous as it has been the whole day. “Mila, stop!” I cry out because she’s freaking me out. She has tried to make me change my outfit too many times and I’m about to murder someone.

“You’re going on a date with Ed. I can’t calm down!” she replies and I roll my eyes.

“It’s not a date. I’ve told you that too many times already,” I repeat walking away.

I don’t see anything wrong with what I’m wearing: black leggings, a long grey t-shirt with my grey hoodie. Of course, along with my black combat boots that I just love. They are similar to Alex’s, mine are just shorter and older as I wear them all the time. Anyways, this is me. I’m not the kind of girl who wears a lot of makeup and enjoys getting ready before going out. I’m the kind who’d rather stay home and if she goes out, she wears the comfiest thing in her wardrobe.

My hair falls in its messy and untamed curls at my left as my right side of the head is buzzed. My hair is weird: it has its own personality, I think, and it has many colours. It’s not simply brown, it has some dark shades of blonde and even some reddish locks here and there. I don’t particularly like it, but it’s the only hair I have and I need to learn to live with it.

“It is a date and you know it, that’s why you’re so nervous,” she tells me walking towards me and I close my eyes so I can’t meet hers.

I know it. Harry told me the same thing and I guess that anyone else would say the same thing, but I feel calmer if I say that it’s not. If I accept out loud that Ed asked me out, I would freak out, lock myself in my room until the end of the world.

I don’t understand what possessed Ed to ask me out after his concert and I honestly don’t think it’s a bet. He’s not that type: he’s the honest, shy and awkward kind of guy, which, I think, allows him to write that authentic music I love so deeply. But if it’s not a bet, then I don’t know what it is. I just don’t see any other reason for a guy to accept to go on a date with me.

Maybe Harry convinced Ed to asked me out as a revenge for all the times I’ve pranked him. That would be fair.

“Have fun today and I’ll stay awake so you can tell me everything later,” she tells me hugging me from behind.

“I’ll tell you how amazing the gig was and how stupid you are for missing it,” I tell her and my best friend laughs.

“I love you, too,” she replies and hugs me tighter.

I’m afraid this is going to be a disaster.

* * *

I’m in first row. This is amazing, right in front of the middle of the stage and everyone around me is excited. Ed is about to come out and I can’t believe I’ll finally see him live. I’ve always wanted to come to one of his gigs, but every time something came up that didn’t allow me to do so. This is my first Ed Sheeran gig and I’m in the first row. My life has just been made.

My VIP pass is hanging from my neck under my hoodie and Ed told me that when the show is over, I have to show it to one of the guards and he will take me backstage. I’m really excited and I can’t wait for the show to start. I know it’s going to be amazing and I have my stomach filled with mutant radioactive butterflies! Hulk is nothing compared to my butterflies, Nick Fury had called me a few times to ask my butterflies to join the Avengers, but they are busy making me sick.

Mate, I have weird monologues in my mind.

The lights dim and I scream along with everyone else and my mutant butterflies go even crazier. In a matter of minutes, Ed appears on stage with James II, I can recognise his guitar and I feel like crying. I can’t believe I’m actually here. He stands up in front of the mic and looks around the crowd and I can see his happiness at seeing so many people there just for him. Then, his eyes find me and a different smile plays on his lips. I feel all giddy inside and I know it’s not only for all the pheromones in the air.

The gig is plain amazing. There’s no other word to describe it. Ed is just epic on stage: his energy, his talent, his connection with the audience, his jokes. Everything. While he was singing Give Me Love his eyes were on me –as he knows that Give Me Love is one of my favourite songs of his– and I swear I felt like I was alone in the middle of the crowd, just listening to him.

He leaves the stage and people start leaving but I stay there and try to call some guard’s attention. I can’t wait to see Ed and tell him how amazing the show was and how amazing he is. I’m so excited and my adrenaline is running so high it’s not even funny.

A guard finally sees me and I show him my VIP pass, so he helps me to pass the fence and leads me backstage, but when I see Ed with a towel talking to a man, I can’t control myself and I start running. I’m still so excited from the show.

“Ed!” I cried out his name and he turns around just in the moment when I’m in front of him and throw my arms around him to give him a bear hug. “That was amazing! Best gig ever. You’re incredible! Thank you so much,” I tell him so fast I fear he won’t understand me.

He hugs me back, his arms tightly around me and I’m in my tiptoes. Ed is not really tall, as I prefer on men, but he’s taller than me for a few centimetres and that’s perfect. “I’m glad you like it but maybe you should wait a bit before hugging me. I’m all sweaty,” he says laughing and I shake my head.

“I don’t care,” I reply honestly. He may be all sweaty, but he doesn’t smell so I’m okay with this.

At my answer, he hugs me tighter and I must confess, it feels great to be in his arms and I kind of forget about everything else in that moment. I allow myself a moment of weakness but I put myself together when he says: “Come with me to the dressing room. I’ll be ready in ten and we can go out later.”

At the thought of us going somewhere else later, alone, I step back breaking the embrace and looking away. “Uh, sure,” I reply but my voice sounds uncertain and small. I really don’t know how to act in this kind of situation. I’m so out of my comfort zone, it’s impressive.

“Come,” he says motioning with his head to his left and starts walking. I follow him in complete silence and wanting to run away. Maybe I should tell him that Mila needs me and I have to go. Would he notice I’m lying? He doesn’t know me that well, maybe he won’t. “Wait here, I’ll be done in ten minutes. I promise,” he tells me when we are in the dressing room, his eyes on me and his cute smile.

I nod whilst looking my surroundings. There’s a comfy sofa, some of his guitars, food, water, mirrors with other asthenic stuff I don’t know the names of. It’s like any other dressing room, I guess. Not that I’ve been in too many, only in the lads’ ones and they are always bigger than this and with more people around.

Ed leaves me there alone and I entertain myself looking at his guitars. There are all so special and I love how they look so old and used. They feel alive to me. I’ve always wanted to learn to play the guitar but I guess I’m a hopeless case. Same goes with singing. I sing all the time but I never hit the right note, I’m always below and it’s pointless trying harder, my hearing is just terrible when it comes to singing.

As promised, Ed is back in less than ten minutes and he looks renewed. He’s wearing simple jeans, trainers, a black t-shirt under a blue hoodie that makes his hair looks even more ginger. He looks so good in blue. “Ready?” he asks and I’m shaking inside, so I nod because I don’t trust my voice to sound normal. I’m still trying to figure out why he wants to spend time alone with me, why he asked me out in the first place, but I don’t dare to ask.

The best option to deal with this is pretending that it’s not a date: we’re just hanging out like friends, like when I go out with Harry for a coffee or something like that, or like all the other times we have talked and spent some time alone. There’s no difference whatsoever. I just have to be myself and stop thinking about this. Whatever the reason for him to ask me out is, it’s irrelevant.

“But we need to sneak out. I’m sure Stuart wants me to do something else, I think he said something about that before the gig,” he confesses and I chuckle. Ed smiles sheepishly, his blue eyes looking brighter and his awkward smile adorning his features. “Shall we?”

I nod again and he offers me his hand before pulling up his hoodie. I take it nervously and together we walk outside the dressing room, careful not to bump into someone. We have to hide a couple of times when we are about to get caught, but we finally manage to leave the venue without someone noticing us. Before I can say something, Ed is running down the street, dragging me along the way, until he sees a double decker bus and we get on it in the next stop. I don’t know what’s in his mind, I just follow him. He never lets my hand go until we are in the bus.

“Are you safe here?” I ask him when we catch our breaths and he laughs.

“Yeah, my fans are chill. Just in case, I’ll keep the hoodie up,” he replies and I nod. I’m used to being scared of fans since I started hanging out with One Direction. I’m used to knowing there’s at least one bodyguard nearby.

“And what’s the plan?” I inquire, smiling. I just followed him, I don’t know where we are going.

“We’re going to a nice place I really like. It has the best pizzas in London,” he replies and I have to admit it: he got me the minute he said ‘the best pizzas in London’. Well, he got me when he said pizza, end of story.

“I like the sound of that,” I state, still smiling and my mutant butterflies come alive again at the way he’s looking at me.

-:-:-:-

That's everything for now. If you like it, please comment and vote. I love to hear what you think even if i can't reply your comments at the moment. Sorry about that.

At the sidebar, more or less how Moni looks.

Chapter dedicated to Sam because she was the first person I sent this chapter and who made me believe in Edni since the very beginning. It's thank to her that this story exists. 

Bel, xx