Draco

            "God damn it, Eve, don't leave—fuck."

            She ducked out of my reach when I tried to grab her arm, slipping through the doorway and disappearing from my bedroom without another word. Swearing loudly, I ripped the nearest jacket off of the closet door and stormed out of the room after Eve.

            Why couldn't she just listen to me for once? I was trying to help her, for fuck's sake—

            She was just at the top of the staircase when I rounded the corner of the hallway, tugging the jacket on as quickly as I could so that my ripped shirt sleeve would be covered. "Eve," I whispered furiously, knowing that my parents would be able to hear us now if we raised our voices, "please don't do this."

            But Eve ignored me, continuing down the steps and leaving me to hurry after her. My feet tripped up against the rug that ran down the length of each stair, making me almost stumble down the staircase. I was completely infuriated, frantic at the fact that she wasn't listening to me—and absolutely devastated at the thought that she wasn't going to get away from this.

            I finally caught up to her when she was walking down the hallway, but the moment I reached for her arm, the hall opened into the parlor and my parents were looking up to see us walk in. Exhaling furiously but trying to hide it, I put my arm back down at my side and resisted the urge to grab Eve and drag her back out of the room. I stood beside her with my hands clenched into fists at my sides, glancing down at her to see that she was staring straight ahead as we stopped in front of my parents. She was looking my father dead in the eye.

            As angry as she was making me, it was clear that this was not the same Eve I had met nearly a year ago in Hogsmeade.

            Lucius stared down at the two of us, as though coldly calculating what we were thinking. I looked at my mother quickly to see that she was watching me with an even gaze, and it was like she knew exactly what I had been trying to do upstairs—I tried not to feel uneasy under her careful gaze.

            "I assume Draco has told you about the circumstances?" my father asked in a clipped tone, making the anger flare up hot in my belly.

            "Yes," Eve said, her voice coming out strong and clear. "He has."

            "Good," Lucius mused, turning his gaze to me and making me glare heatedly at him in return when the corner of his mouth turned up. "Then you understand that your cooperation is vital, Miss Hawkings?"

            I squeezed my fists so tightly that my fingernails dug into my palms, pressing my teeth together to keep from snapping at him. How dare he talk to her like that, as though she meant nothing to anyone, like he could care less about what happened to her—

            "Yes," Eve said again, her head held high. "It's over now anyway. I'm done running."

            "But then of course, you understand that it's not only your life at stake here," Lucius said, making me want to leap across the gap between us and strangle him. Before I could cut him off, he told Eve easily, "I'm sure Draco told you that our family will be in danger if you don't do as the Dark Lord wishes."

            Eve's head snapped left to look at me, but all I could do was glare furiously at my father and try not to explode. I had told them not to say anything about that to Eve, but it was clear Lucius had done it purposefully. I gritted my teeth together to keep from yelling as he glanced over at me with a cool expression, as though he was nearly smirking at me. Now Eve was never going to leave.

            "No, he didn't tell me that," Eve said, her voice only faltering slightly.

            "It didn't matter," I said in a tight voice, pretending not to notice the way my mother looked at me. Eve was watching me too, like she couldn't believe that I would put her before my own family—but she would never know that it had been one of the hardest decisions of my life, or that I hadn't slept for the past two nights trying to figure out a way to get Eve out of this. There was no way I could make her understand why I would put her life before mine in a second.

            "You should have..." Eve trailed off, clearing her throat to even her tone and looking away from me. "It doesn't matter. I'm staying anyway."

            My vision turned dark as Lucius smiled down at her, the anger boiling up hot again when he said, "Good."

            And then he said the words that made my stomach drop into my shoes.

            "The Dark Lord is ready for you now."

            "What?" I snapped, stepping forward and nearly putting myself between Eve and my father. "He's here? Tell me this is some sort of sick joke, he wasn't supposed to—"

            "We called him this morning," Lucius said coolly, looking down at me. "He arrived while you were upstairs. The Dark Lord wishes to speak with Evelyn."

            "She can't," I said in a hard voice. "She can't see him now, it's too soon—"

            "It's okay," Eve interrupted quietly, and I turned to see her looking up at me. Her voice sounded firm but incredibly small as she told me, "It's okay. I'll go."

            I was opening my mouth to tell them all that this wasn't right, that Eve couldn't see the Dark Lord after she had only just found out what he knew—but my mother cut me off, saying in a thin voice, "She doesn't have a choice, Draco. He wants to see her."

            After a moment, I bit out angrily, "Fine. Let's go, then."

            "Draco," Lucius said coldly, reaching out one arm to stop me. His tone was unbelievably condescending as he reminded me, "He wants to see her alone."

            I heard Eve inhale softly behind me at his words, and that was all it took.

            "Are you mad?" I snapped loudly, not even caring when my mother flinched behind Lucius. "There's no way in hell I'm letting her go in there alone. Why the fuck would I ever leave her alone with him? No, she's not going in there by herself—"

            "Be quiet," Lucius hissed, grabbing my shirt collar in his fist and glaring down at me lividly. "The Dark Lord is here."

            I hadn't realized how loud my voice had gotten—but at the moment, I didn't care. Fuming, I reached up and ripped my father's hand away from the shirt collar, repeating furiously, "She is not going in there alone—"

            "Draco," Eve said quietly, and that finally made me turn away from Lucius. She was looking up at me with a carefully blank expression, as though she was too afraid to betray any kind of emotion. Her voice was soft as she told me, "It's okay. Really."

            I looked down at her and saw that she was panicking on the inside, even though she was doing everything she could to appear completely calm. It was enough to make me want to grab onto her and Disapparate—but I couldn't do that, not matter how badly I wanted to.

            When I didn't say anything for a moment, Eve repeated even more quietly, "Draco. I'll be okay."

            I was staring down at her seriously, ready to open my mouth and whisper that nothing was okay anymore, but Lucius cut me off. "We can't keep him waiting. Let's go, Evelyn."

            My back was still to my parents as Eve took a deep breath and squared her shoulders, so I looked her straight in the eye and mouthed, 'I love you.'

            As she finally had to break eye contact and move past me, I hoped she knew that I meant it with everything I had—even after everything I had done.

            I was completely livid as Eve started away from me, my hands shaking as I turned around to watch her go. Eve was making her way past Lucius when he reached up to hold her arm—almost as though he was going to lead her out of the room—but I launched myself forward and grabbed his wrist before he could. Eve kept on walking as Lucius twisted his head to look down at me, and I whispered furiously, "Don't touch her."

            He gave me the coldest glare possible as Eve followed my mother towards the hallway, but the last thing I wanted was for him to touch her when he was giving her over to the Dark Lord. Ignoring the voice in the back of my mind that whispered, 'You're the one who brought her here in the first place', I finally let go of my father's arm. I looked over his shoulder to see that Eve was almost to the door that led out of the parlor, the door that opened into the hallway— the hallway that would lead to the Dark Lord's room.

            And then all of a sudden, I realized I couldn't let her do this.

            I tried to push past my father so I could run to her, so I could grab her and Disapparate—but Lucius immediately stepped in my path and I ran into his chest instead. I pushed against him, trying to shove past him, but he grabbed my arms and hissed, "Stay here."

            But I was almost frantic now, realizing that Eve was leaving me to meet with the Dark Lord completely alone. I tried to hit Lucius's chest but he was holding my arms too tightly, and I looked over his shoulder again to see that my mother was holding open the door for Eve, telling her which room to go to. Eve glanced over her shoulder at me as my mother guided her out of the door, her eyes full of fear, and I watched helplessly as she disappeared out the doorway. My mother shut the door behind her, and my chest filled with self-loathing as I realized what I had done.

            Lucius was still gripping my shoulders to keep me from running after her, but I pushed myself away from him angrily. He stumbled back only slightly, and I spat furiously, "I'll never forgive you for this."

            My parents looked at me carefully, as though they were expecting me to completely flip out and run out after Eve. But I just stood there furiously, my hands balled into fists and my chest heaving.

            "It's for the best," my mother said quietly, but I was so angry that I barely heard her.

            I shoved past my father, and this time, he didn't try to stop me. I stormed towards the door Eve had left through, snapping over my shoulder, "I'm waiting in the hallway."

            I left my parents behind in the parlor, slamming the door behind me so forcefully that the walls practically shook. With my chest burning, I slammed my fist into the wall just beside the doorframe, not even caring when my knuckles smashed against the hard plaster. I slid down to the floor just a few feet from the doorway to the parlor, my back pressed against the wall. I kept my eyes on the door just down the hallway, not being able to hear anything but knowing that Eve was just inside—alone with the Dark Lord.

            I tilted my head back so forcefully that it banged against the wall, but it didn't make me feel any better. I kept my gaze focused on that door, my stomach lurking with self-hatred.

            I had told Lucius that I would never forgive him for this, but deep down, I knew that I really couldn't forgive myself.

~*~

            I waited well over two hours out in that hallway for Eve to come back.

            My back was aching badly from sitting against the wall for so long, but I could barely feel it—I refused to move, anyway. My mother had opened the parlor door twice to see if I was still there, but I didn't even glance up to acknowledge her. I was worried I would say something terrible if I turned to look at her.

            I had heard nothing from the room Eve was in this entire time, but I wasn't sure if the Dark Lord had used a spell to soundproof it or not—either way, I was getting more uneasy by the second. She'd been in there alone with him for two hours, and he had just found out that her parents had been loyal Death Eaters and she'd been hiding from him all this time...if I thought for too long about what he might be doing, I felt sick to my stomach.

            The silence of the hallway pressed against my ears, so I busied myself by looking down at my hands and running my fingers over the already bruised knuckles from where I had hit the wall. My chest now felt so tight that it was becoming difficult to breathe, as though there wasn't enough air.

            I was still staring down at my hands when there was the unmistakable crack of a Disapparation coming from the room just down the hallway. I was on my feet in an instant, not even caring when I got up so quickly that my back protested. There was complete silence again, and I stared at the closed door, unsure if I should burst in or not—what if Eve had been the one to Disapparate?

            Before I could panic at the thought of this, the door opened slowly from the inside. I was already starting forward when I saw that it was Eve, quietly coming out of the room with her head down. Her hair was hiding her face as I reached her, but I didn't hesitate to pull her tight against my chest. I held her flush against me, both my arms wrapped around her so closely that I was worried I might be hurting her a little. Neither of us said anything for a long time, but I didn't think I would be able to say anything around the lump in my throat anyway.

            I pulled back finally and put my hands on either side of her face, ready to wipe away her tears—but she wasn't crying. Eve clearly hadn't cried at all; her eyes were clear and her cheeks dry as she looked up at me with a dull expression.

            "Did he hurt you?" I blurted, my voice coming out so quiet that I wasn't sure if she could hear me.

            Eve's eyes flicked to the ground and didn't say anything, and that was when I realized she was clutching her left forearm.

            My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach as I reached down and gently turned over her arm, the black ink tattoo revealing itself sharply against the pale skin of her forearm. The breath was trapped in my throat as I looked down at it, seeing the Dark Mark that was imprinted into her skin—forever.

            I think I had known this was going to happen, but seeing the mark on Eve was making me hate myself even more than before.

            "I..." I trailed off, my voice hitching and dying inside my throat before I could finish the sentence. Eve looked back up at me silently, and then my entire body was shaking and I was whispering, "I'm so sorry. I—I'm sorry—"

            And then I was hugging her again, pulling her impossibly close to my chest as though I couldn't have any space between us. I kept repeating to her quietly how sorry I was, but it didn't matter how sorry I was, because I had dragged her into something terrible—something that neither of us could get out of.

            The door to the parlor opened behind us, making me finally quit apologizing uselessly and turn around. Lucius was standing in the doorway looking down the short length of the hallway at us, making the anger flare up hot again. I took Eve's hand in my own automatically and started for the door, wanting nothing more than to go back upstairs before I could lose it.

            Lucius was opening his mouth to say something to us, but I brushed past him with Eve close behind me before he could get anything out. My mother was still standing in the parlor, and as I stormed past her, she began carefully, "Wait, Draco—"

            "Leave us alone," I snapped in a tight voice, staring straight ahead instead of glancing her way.

            My parents didn't try to stop us as we disappeared from the parlor and hurried upstairs.

            When I finally reached my room, I shut the door behind us and pulled out my wand to lock it—because seeing one of my parents again was the last thing I wanted. I turned around to see that Eve was looking blankly out my window at the moon, the sky now completely blackened by the night time. The moonlight reflected off her face, but when I took a step towards her, she looked away from the window to face me.

            I closed the distance between us and put my hands on both of her cheeks again, looking at her straight on. I searched her eyes carefully to try to read what she was really feeling—but for the first time in a long while, I found that I couldn't. I asked seriously, "Tell me the truth. Are you okay?"

            When she finally spoke, her voice sounded scratchy and I had to strain to hear her even though my bedroom was completely quiet. "Yeah. I'm okay."

            "It's alright," I said, "if you need to cry. Let it out."

            "I'm fine," Eve told me, her voice cracking slightly. "Really."

            But then her knees buckled and I had to grab her quickly, holding her up off the ground. We stumbled to the bed and I helped her to sit down, holding her shoulders with shaky hands. Eve couldn't seem to hold herself upright even sitting down, so I laid her down on the bed, tugging off her sneakers gently. I kicked off my own shoes and lay down opposite her, holding both her hands in mine between us.

            Eve was looking at the pillow instead of at me as she said blankly, "I don't feel well. Is that normal?"

            My heart twisted inside me as I looked at her, and I choked out, "I threw up after it happened to me. You're doing good."

            I was opening my mouth to apologize for what must have been the thousandth time when Eve whispered, "He...he told me he had to do it so I wouldn't go into hiding again. So he'd always be able to find me."

            "Oh," I breathed, my voice tight with emotion. I didn't think I could say much more, because the giant lump in my throat had returned and I was having trouble just breathing again.

            "It hurt," Eve said quietly. "A lot."

            I could feel my eyes starting to water, so I blinked hard to try and clear it before Eve could notice. My voice sounded thick when I said, "I'm—I'm so sorry. So, so sorry Eve, I—"

            She reached over then and touched my cheek with a cool palm, finally looking me in the eye and whispering, "You don't have to be sorry."

            "I do," I said. "This is my fault. It's all my fault, I never should have sent you that letter—not when I knew what would happen. I should have told you what was going to happen to me at the start of the summer, I should have told you to stay away from me, I—"

            I broke off, because my words were starting to jumble together and I wasn't even sure what I was saying anymore. I started again after taking in a shaky breath, hoping that Eve couldn't see how blurry my eyes had become. "I should've—I should've told you to stay away from me the moment I found out I was going to be a Death Eater. That wasn't fair to you, I'm sorry, I'm sorry—"

            I looked down at her arm and the guilt crashed over me again, making my head spin and my chest ache. Pulling her arm closer to me, I bent my head forward and kissed the inked skin as gently as I could—as though I could make the mark disappear. When Eve took my hand in hers and ran her fingers through my hair with the other, I choked out, "I'm so sorry—I never wanted you to be involved. I never wanted any of this."

            My cheeks were wet, despite how hard I had been trying to hold it in. And then Eve was kissing me, pressing her lips against my cheeks to kiss away the tears—kissing my face and whispering against my skin that it wasn't my fault. But I couldn't speak around the lump in my throat again to tell her that no, it was my fault.

            And I had never hated myself more.

            We lay there together for the rest of the night without saying anything, our breath mingling and our inked arms entangled between us. I started to fall asleep no matter how hard I tried to stay awake, and my eyes slowly drifted shut; the last thing I heard was Eve telling me softly that she loved me.

            But I remembered thinking that she shouldn't have loved me anymore.

            Not after what I had put her through.