Ch. 23 How do we move on?
Tony let out a long sigh,
"So, let me get this right. You want me to let you, a wanted murderer, to go outside to... see the stars? You want me to put everyone at risk so that you can stargaze?" Tony said, his tone dripping in sarcasm.
Rina winced at his wording. She knew what she was but he didn't have to say it like that,
"Um... yeah?" She said but it sounded more like a question. "It- it was Maxim's favorite thing to do... I just thought it would be a good way to honor him" she said softly.
Covering his face with his hand, he let out another dramatic sigh,
"Fine, chica. You win. I'll see if the Manchurian Candidate is around" he said finally before exiting the room.
Rina tilted her head in confusion, Tony always said funny words before nodding.
Like almost all things, she remembered Tony in bits and pieces. She remembered the ghosts in his eyes and the biting force of his words. Rina thought it was to cover up how he really felt, maybe he was scared like she was.
While he was gone, Rina tried to make a list of everyone she knew and what she remembered about them. She had been given a dry erase marker what she could use to write on the wall. She wasn't allowed a pencil or paper because they were considered weapons she could use. But Rina was grateful for the marker. The wall was covered in her jumbled handwriting which were mostly random words and doodles.
Uncapping the marker, she wrote all the names of everyone she could remember on a blank wall: Tony, Steve, Peter, Rhodes, Pepper, Sam, Vision, Wanda, Bucky and Natasha. She tapped the marker against her chin as she looked at the names she'd just wrote on the wall. She then began to write every detail and memory she could remember about them. Faces were fuzzy but the memories and feelings came and went.
(Hi! Renee here: below will be what Rina wrote on the wall *thumbs up*)
Tony:
- bossy
- haunted
- doesn't trust easily
- very smart
- kind (sometimes)
- man of iron?
Steve:
- likes to run
- old man
- very strong and tall
- doesn't understand technology
- is sad sometimes
- misses home
Peter:
- spider boy
- high fives
- bad at punching
- friend
Rhodes:
- don't remember much
- funny
- friend of Tony
Pepper:
- smart lady
- I like her
Sam:
- doesn't like to run
- good cook (likes chocolate?)
- friend of Steve
Vision:
- robot man
- Wanda likes him
- talks funny
Wanda:
- nail polish
- magic
- kind
- gives good hugs
- sad (I don't remember why)
Bucky:
- saved me
- quiet
- flowers
- blue eyes
- metal arm
- like me
Natasha:
- saved me
- red hair
- funny
- patient
- lullaby (pretty voice)
- protector
Ekaterina:
- ????
Rina was still writing when she heard the door from behind the glass open. Tony had returned with Bucky a few steps behind.
"Oh so I do you a favor and you vandalize my wall?" Tony asked her with a wave of his hand.
Rina began to apologize when she was interrupted,
"He's kidding" the other man assured her. He had a blanket tucked under his metal arm, "you ready?" He asked.
Rina nodded and extended her arms out in front of her, expecting handcuffs.
James shook his head, "you don't need those, not with me" he said
Tony looked like he wanted to object but surprisingly, he held his tongue and simply unlocked the door to Rina's cell.
Despite his earlier assurances, Ekaterina kept her hands pressed firmly to her sides, in plain view anyways as they made their way outside.
Rina didn't know what time it was but it was completely dark when the cool night air hit her skin for the first time in months.
She shuddered from the sudden chill.
Bucky noticed immediately, "you need a jacket, you must be freezing" he said, a frown on his face. He didn't have a jacket to give so he turned, wondering if they should go back.
Rina shook her head, "no, no I'm fine" she assured him. "I like the chill, makes me feel alive"
It was true, the girl hadn't had fresh air, seen the sun or felt the wind on her skin in what seemed like months.
The man didn't say a word, he knew that feeling all too well. Feeling so lost that you'd do anything to feel alive.
He simply led her to a secluded spot, still close enough for the cameras to keep an eye on them but far enough away to see the stars.
A blanket and a basket was waiting for them. Ekaterina sat on the corner of the blanket like she wanted to take up as little room as possible. As if she were afraid to be too close. But he didn't seem to mind, sitting down before laying on his back silently.
"Which one is that?" He asked after several moments of silence, pointing towards the sky.
Rina laid on her back so that she could see better, but did not move any closer. She smiled when she saw where he was pointing.
"Ah!" She exclaimed, "Andromeda!" Rina said excitedly. While Maxim loved the stars and the science behind them, Rina preferred the stories behind them.
"Tell me about it" Bucky said softly, not looking away from the cluster of stars. Stargazing wasn't really his thing but he'd listen to anything she had to say.
Ekaterina grinned and flipped onto her stomach so that she could look at him,
"Andromeda was a princess in Greek Mythology. She was considered very beautiful but her mother was very vain. She boasted of the girl's beauty and upset the sea nymphs. In order to appease them, Poseidon sent a sea monster to her town to kill Andromeda" the girl said trailing off
Bucky was no longer looking at the sky, "did they?" He asked
Rina shook her head,
"The town thought sacrificing Andromeda was the only way to appease the gods. So she was chained to a rock and left to die" she said before taking a pause, "but the hero, Perseus was flying by and saw her. He freed her from the chains" she said.
They were both silent. In a way, they both knew what that felt like. To be chained with no hope of escape until help came.
Feeling awkward in the silence,
"That's my favorite one" Ekaterina said softly.
Bucky simply nodded and turned his head to continue to gaze at the sky. Rina set her lips in a thin line, she had forgotten how quiet he was. It was a comfortable silence, but silence nonetheless.
Ekaterina looked like she wanted to say more but couldn't. Like something was stopping her from saying what she wanted.
So she embraced the silence. Until he broke it.
"Katie" he said softly to get the girl's attention, "you know Maxim lived here for a few months after..." he trailed off,
"He was a good kid. A bit snarky but a good kid, he was a good friend to you. He fought for you until the end of the line. Getting you back was the one thing keeping him going" he said genuinely.
Bucky had really come to care for the dark haired boy. He was intelligent, cocky and arrogant but the kid had a passion in him that James had really began to admire.
"I know you too made a promise to find each other. He fulfilled his promise. He found you, Rina, he brought you home. And he won't ever be gone, so long as we remember him" he said.
"Remembering him won't take back what I've done. He was gonna do great things, he wanted to get out and stop fighting. And how did he die? He died fighting me... I just don't know how to let him go. He's just always been there, I don't know who I am without him" she said honestly, "even when I had nothing, I had Maxim"
The man's breath caught. He was at a loss for words. He didn't know what to say or how to comfort her. Even when he had nothing, he had Steve. He had someone to fight for him, to remember who he was before Hydra took everything. But Rina had lost the only friend she ever had, the only person who had seen her grow up.
"You have us, Katie" he said quietly, "and I know it doesn't feel like it, but you have yourself and that means a lot at the end of the day" he knew his words could only do so much, there was a lot she had to figure out on her own.
As much as he wanted to fight her battles for her, he couldn't. No one could.
Rina smiled softly, "I know, I know", she took a breath, "yeah, I'm still figuring out who that is"
Bucky nodded, "you will"
~~~
Bucky walked Ekaterina back to her holding cell. He hated that she had to spend all her time there in those four blank walls with nothing but a cot. It was so empty and bare but Tony said it was for the best. So he let it the subject drop, for now.
When he dropped her off, Rina had tried to give him a smile but it didn't reach her eyes. He knew that look all too well. He'd given it more times than he could count. Wanting to remember and go back to the way things were before but being unable to. Feeling like a piece of yourself was missing and you could never get it back. She was so young to be going through all of that. Children shouldn't have to carry that much on their shoulder.
He was feeling defeated as he made his way back to his and Natasha's shared room. He opened the door as silently as he could, he half expected the red head to be asleep. He should have know she wouldn't be.
The woman stood up when she heard the door open,
"How is she? How did it-?" She began to ask but quickly stopped.
Bucky had moved forward quickly and wrapped his arms around the small woman. He was so tense and so tired that all he needed was the soft touch of her and to know that she was there and that she wasn't going anywhere, he forgot that sometimes.
"Oh" Nat mumbled softly but held him all the tighter.
Soft touches and hugs were not something that Bucky and Natasha had a lot of growing up. Natasha was especially wary of unnecessary touch, she had hated it (much like Rina) growing up. In her experience, she was hit more than she was hugged so the concept had become strange to her. But it was a comfort that she had come to crave. And it seemed like he felt the same way.
"She's strong, she's so strong but she's just a child. She's just a kid, Nat, she's just a kid. I-" his voice broke off, muffled by Natasha's shoulder.
The red head's heart lurched. "I know, I know" she said as she comfortingly rubbed his back.
Natasha hated this. She hated feeling weak. She wanted to help them but couldn't. She couldn't because she didn't know what it was like. She didn't know what it was like to completely forget who she was. She knew the guilt of surviving but not of forgetting, that was something Rina and James shared.
"God, I can't imagine. I mean I can't help but thinking, what if I'd completed it? Steve was my mission. What if I'd killed him like I'd been instructed. I- I don't know if I could have come back from that" his breath was shallow and shaky
Natasha shook her head, "like you said, she's strong. All we can do is be there and try to help her through it. She's still not fully in control of her own mind, when she is, we'll face it... together" she said forcefully, pulling back slightly to meet his gaze.
He just nodded.
Sleep did not bring him peace. Instead it brought him back to Russia with a pain in his arm and a pain in his heart.
~~~
"Tony! Tony! Stop!" Wanda called after the retreating man.
"I don't wanna hear it, Mind Games, don't you use your little witchy tricks on me" he said in his usual tone
In a flash of red, the door Tony was trying to walk through shut. His mouth was open as he turned around.
Wanda's eyes were returning to normal.
"You might want to listen to her Tony" Steve called as he was turning the corner, Sam not far behind him.
"I'm starting to think this is a set up" Tony said, his dry humor not appeasing the crowd.
"Tony, she's just a kid and you've got her locked up like a prisoner. She's seen the sunlight once and only spoken to three people in months!" Wanda began to plead with him,
"I know what it's like to be afraid of your own mind, being isolated and locked away like that makes it worse" Wanda said sadly.
Everyone knew what Wanda had been through after the fight at the airport. Tony knew better than most, he'd been part of it. And he felt guilty for that, more guilty than he ever let on.
"Let me guess all of you are going to say the same thing?" Tony asked looking at the small crowd that had gathered.
Steve nodded while Sam scoffed,
"Well, she said it a hell of a lot nicer than we would have" Sam commented and Steve just shook his head at his friend.
"So what is it that you all want? You want visiting hours? Is that it? Fine. One at a time- but you stay behind the glass and keep it short, if she starts to act up, I'm putting this whole place on lockdown" the man said sternly, but deep down he knew it was time.
Wanda broke into a grin that she couldn't hide, she nodded a thank you to Tony before turning to walk away- probably to tell everyone else the good news.
"Thank you, Tony" Steve said genuinely before turning to leave as well.
"Yeah, man, you're not so bad sometimes" Sam said following after Steve.
"Sam" Steve's voice came from down the hall.
"What? We were all thinking it" the man shot back.
Tony groaned, what was he doing?
~~~
Wanda and Vision were the first to visit Rina.
The girl's back was to the glass as she was writing on the wall. Tapping the marker against her chin as she thought.
Not wanting to startle the girl, the two just stood there for a moment. Or until a certain bit of writing caught Wanda's eye, her own name and Vision's next to it.
The woman let out a small chuckle, "hello Ekaterina" she said.
The small girl turned and smiled, "hello there" she said kindly but she didn't seem to fully recognize who she was speaking to.
"Oh I'm sorry, dear, you probably don't remember us-" the woman began but the girl cut her off
"No, no do not be sorry. I can't remember everything from... before but I do remember you. Kind of. Wanda. It comes and goes but you were kind" she said to Wanda,
"And you talked funny but you were kind too" Rina said to Vision.
Wanda smiled softly at the girl, "that's right and I see you have a few more memories" she said pointing at the wall.
The girl simply nodded.
"Well, don't tell Tony. But we brought something for you" Wanda said nodding at Vision.
Vision nodded at Wanda in silent agreement, he then closed his eyes and phased through the glass separating them and Rina.
Rina took a surprised step back.
"It's alright, Miss, we just wanted to give you this" he said holding a small bottle in his hands.
Rina gave a crooked smile,
"Nail polish" she said happily, "I remember that day"
Wanda grinned at the girl's words, it was a memory the woman held dear.
Ekaterina gently took the small bottle from the man's outstretched hands.
"Thank you both" she said looking down at the small bottle of red polish. Red. Huh.
"Of course, моя любовь" the woman said sweetly (my love).
The woman took Vision's hand and began to turn to leave.
"ждать!" Ekaterina called to the woman. (Wait!)
Wanda turned and nodded, "hm?" She hummed
The girl took a moment, searching for the right words, "does it get better? The sadness? Does it ever stop hurting?" She asked quietly.
Wanda's heart broke a little, "after a while" she admitted, "loosing someone you love is the kind of pain that never really goes away. We just have to learn to live without them and remember them... until we see them again" Wanda said gently.
Rina nodded, "thank you" she said gently.
"тётя" (aunty)
The word was so quiet, Wanda was scarcely sure she heard it. But when they closed the door, she looked at Vision who was smiling and she knew.
"Why didn't anyone tell me? I would have been here sooner, I-" Peter was arguing with Tony.
"You were at school, kid" the man said back tiredly.
"Peter, Peter it's alright. Sam is in there with her now, you can visit with her next, how's that, Queens?" Steve said kindly to the boy.
"Yeah... yeah, I'd like that thank you Mr. Steve" he said excitedly.
~~~
"Hey, girl, how are you doin'? They treating you well?" Sam asked
Rina nodded. This must be Sam, his presence and way of speaking was familiar to her.
"Not bad. I've got food, myself and my thoughts. What else could a girl need?" She asked trying to keep the mood light.
"Well, you deserve a lot more kiddo but this is all I can offer right now" he said.
Rina watched him move out of sight and heard a clang. Suddenly a small bag fell onto the floor out of a small chute.
Curious, the girl picked it up.
"Go ahead, try it" the man encouraged.
Rina opened the bag and put a single chip in her mouth, her eyes widened in memory.
Then,
The girl genuinely laughed,
"It's chocolate, thank you, Sam" she said earnestly.
"Don't sweat it. You'll be out here in no time and I'll make you all the chocolate chip pancakes you can eat" he promised.
"I look forward to it" the girl smiled.
Sam simply smiled before he also left.
"You're up, kid" Rina heard Sam say.
Peter walked into the room, his eyes immediately drawn to the words all over the wall.
"Wow, you've been busy" he joked.
Looking back at the wall she shrugged, "I guess I have"
"That's good, that's good" he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
"I brought books for you while you were gone, i know how you love the stars. I left them by your room but you haven't been there and Mr. Stark wouldn't let me visit you before today-" he babbled
"It's alright, I'm sure I would love them. Maybe you could visit again and read them to me?" She asked
The boy immediately brighten,
"Yeah! I could do that" he exclaimed
Rina smiled, "dope" she said using the word he taught her over a year ago.
Peter grinned at the word, it still sounded strange on her tongue but the effort was what made him smile.
"Yeah, it'll be dope" he agreed.
"So, have you gotten better at punching while I was away?" She asked curiously.
"Yes! I've been training with Nat, she's been teaching me how to control the spidey sense and use it"
Rina tilted her head, confused,
"Spidey sense?" She repeated, she didn't know that word.
"Oh yeah! It's kind of like a tingle I get before something bad happens" he tried to explain
"Oh, strange" she said.
~~~
They talked for a bit longer, laughing and carrying on until a knock came at the door,
"Come on kid, it's late and you know what Aunt May will do to us both if you aren't home on time" Tony said from the doorway.
Peter frowned but nodded, "it was really good to see you Rina, I'll be back as soon as I can" he promised.
"See you, spider boy" she called.
Tony placed a hand on Peter's back to guide him out of the room.
Once the door was closed Tony looked at the boy, "so, how is she? Anything fo wrong?" He asked genuinely.
Peter shook his head, "no, no, I mean she is different but is that really her fault?"
Tony just nodded,
"Alright, I'm gonna walk the kid out. You're up next, Cap" the man said.
~~~
Rina had her back to the glass, the marker was in her left hand as she wrote. Speaking to them brought more memories to the surface.
She wrote "Pietro" under Wanda's name as the girl had remembered the stories the woman told her of her twin.
And "pancakes" under Sam's name for the promise he'd made.
She was still writing when she heard the door open.
Smiling, she turned around. She was having such a good time seeing and speaking to everyone.
That joy was short lived when a searing pain laced through her head. She let out a short scream, dropping to her knees.
"Rina! What's wrong?" Steve called
"No, no" she shouted, "stay there"
Steve stopped moving. He didn't understand.
The Little Ballerina was fighting for control of her body. She could feel Rina slipping away and the Little Ballerina slowly taking her place.
When the pain finally stopped, the girl stood up eerily straight. Her face void of any emotion,
"You are my mission"
Ahhh! Heyyyy!!! How are you all doing? Been a crazy few months, huh? A new chapter, fun! I've been OBSESSED with WandaVision, it is my favorite thing ever. If they hurt my babies Wanda, Vision and Darcy we are gonna have issues. This was a really fun chapter to write!! What did you all think of the plot twist? Sorry, not sorry lol. I love you all, take care of yourselves!
Xoxo,
Renee
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