Author: _sagigirl_

Reviewed By: neha-pani
~~~~

Amplify(Cover):

The cover is quite vibrant it gives a feel of first love where there are butterflies and happiness. The picture of Manik singing depicts the story of a rockstar but there is just one thing which you can ask your designer to change is the images. Manik's both pics are a bit too small and gets hidden in the silhouette of the girl at the top who is highlighted a bit more. Whereas Manik should be highlighted. Also, your book name is 'Mera Pehla Phela Pyaar' but on your cover, it looks like 'Pyaar Mera Pehla Phela'. So just change it. A picture of Nandini can also be added other than the girl's shadow.

Accent (Title):

The title is sweet and simple. Mera Pehla Phela Pyaar goes exactly with what the story is about. The rockstar who doesn't believe in love falls in love for the very first time. This title itself gives a romantic feel.

Crescendo (Blurb):

A good blurb for any story is very important as it grabs the attention of the reader and makes them read the story further. It's like an advertisement for your story. If the advertising is attractive then people do buy the product and in the case of the story, the work is done by the blurb.
The blurb you have given for your story is very interesting. It is giving a clear picture of what the story is about. The small poetic line used in the end is what makes it more interesting.

Hook (Prologue):

The prologue or Sneek peek of your story has given the inside view of both the protagonists. Two different worlds of two opposite people. I really loved the blend of both. Just there was one thing you could make the change there is the bold font which you have used for dialogues, as well as description, can be changed. Like 'bold font' for dialogues and 'normal font' for description. So it will give a clear view to the readers. The rest all is fine.

Ballad (Plot):

Your story is simple and common of a rockstar and a girl next door, but what has made it more interesting is the way you have presented it with some twists which are yet to get unfolded. The story is going at a very smooth pace with the introduction of fab5, their manager Abhi, Navya's entry, and now Nandini's too. I am sure you will keep this pace and the story will be taking a very interesting turn in the upcoming chapters.

Ensemble (Characters):

The characters are the same as it was in KYY, though you have made some changes here and there which is giving a new look to the characters. I would prefer you to give a complete character sketch of these people. As this will make the readers know about them more. I saw you have given the description of characters as n when they entered the story, but you are dear it hinders the flow in which a reader is reading the story. So if you give a basic character sketch prior then it will be easy for people to know who is there in it and the changes will be more prominent.

Avant Grad (Storyline):

The story is lovely and the way you have shown the bond of each character with one another has made it very clear to the readers. The aura and attitude of Manik Malhotra can be seen from the very start of the story whether it is in the press conference or with friends. He has many shades that can be seen. I really loved the first meet of Manik and Nandini. It was funny, interesting and at the same time gave the 'Tashan feel' to the readers which they will be seeing in the story ahead. The main twist comes where you have introduced Nandini's character as a divorcee and a single mother which comes as a shock for most of the readers as no one thought this coming. This is where you have got brownie points for grabbing the attention of your readers more. As now they will be interested in knowing the backstory of this and also what comes next. You have also given equal screen space to every character which is The overall story is engrossing which is really important.

Cantabile (Grammar):

Your grammar is simple and pretty good. You have very well described the happenings of the story and the scenes in a simple and complete way. There were some errors in capitalization. When you start the next line of dialogue then you need to use capital letters. So you need to go through your book once and make those changes. And as I said earlier it would be better if you keep the dialogues in 'italics' / bold' and the rest of the description in 'normal font'. Nonetheless, you have nice control over your vocabulary.

Dolce (Reviewer's opinion):

I read the entire 8 parts of the story in a day so this may give away that I loved the story a lot. It has everything which a reader would want. Simplicity, fun element, friendship bond and twist. Overall this story has the power to keep the interest of readers intact which is commendable and makes them read ahead. You are doing a great job. And I hope that this story remains this intriguing in near future too.

Thank you,
Neha
(Reviewer,
FMC)

*****

Hope we have helped you.

Kindly complete the due payment of the reviewer.

See you again 😊

#Musicophilias
FMC 💙🎶