The snow fell gracefully as my eyes followed them through the glass window of the cafe. I let out a sigh looking back at the entrance of the cafe waiting for him to be here.

Dragging my eyes back to the book in my hand, I read with my mind out of focus. I could hear the distant noise of people as I was sitting away from the crowded area. I reread the paragraph again and again as I failed to concentrate. My mind was continuously going back to the one thing that's been disturbing me for months now. Even my favorite book couldn't help me calm down and keep my mind off from it for the time being.

I finally gave up and closed the book. I adjusted myself in my seat, sitting straight gaining all the courage inside me. I need to tell him what I feel about us, about our relationship lately. Because I feel it's important for him to know everything is not fine anymore.

It's been months since I started to feel this, like he's drifting away from me. He has changed a lot, to an extent that I don't feel anything between us anymore. It all seems like a show, just for our parents to see we are together. I'm just tired of it and I don't want to be feeling this anymore.

I took a deep breath as I saw him making his way towards me. He was in his formal wear with perfectly gelled hair and polished shoes, it was obvious that he's  straight out from office. He stood out in the cafe and attracted quiet a few eyes. He looked handsome without a doubt but I didn't fall for looks, there was something about him which made my heart flutter every time I was around him but I didn't feel that anymore.

Ignoring the rapid beating of my heart, I forced a smile and waved at him. Vihaan gave me his sweetest smile which I adored the most about him. He took the seat across from mine when I was expecting him to walk up to me and kiss me on my forehead like he always do. I was disappointed, but not surprised. But, honestly I wanted him to be like the old times and give me a reason to hold on. It just hurt me a little more and made it more clear to me why I should do what I'm here to do. I don't want to live in disappointments and he needs to know that.

"So? What is it?" He asked by raising his eyebrows. I let out a sad smile.

"At least say 'hi' or anything else. Can't I just call you anymore?" I asked without hinting anything in my voice. Vihaan extended his hand and put it on mine.

"Hey, zee... I just asked as you called in the middle of work... That's all..." He said with concern, "I'm sorry if I hurt you."

I didn't look at him and fixed my gaze on the book resting on the table with a sad small smile playing on my lips. I refused to speak anything though there was so much I wanted to say to him right at the moment.

"Zee..." Vihaan said further as he shifted in his seat, "What's wrong? Just tell me?"

"Tell you? So that you can go running to my parents and tell them that something is going on with their daughter?" I asked giving him a sharp gaze. He was taken a back for a moment. I didn't regret what I said, because it's true. He has been more of a spy than a boyfriend these last few months.

"When have I..." He started but I cut him off. He doesn't remember? I felt some anger building in me.

"I thought you understand me, Vihaan. I thought you'll always support me in all of my decisions." I said being vulnerable which I hated the most. I wanted to be strong when I say this.

I stopped trying to contain myself and trying to put myself together. I heard Vihaan let out a sigh as he shifted back his hand from mine.

"Look if it's about career in writing then..." He said but I cut him off again by letting out a bitter laugh.

"Then my parents are right about thinking I shouldn't do it and instead focus on business, right?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him. I made sure that anger is visible in my voice and eyes. Vihaan looked at me with a blank face.

The face he puts to show his anger and irritation. I know him too well to know that.

"What's wrong about it?" He asked without giving away any of his emotions, "You are their only daughter. If they want you to handle their business after them then what is wrong in that?" I just kept looking at him. Stunned.

He is no longer the Vihaan I was so used to love. He changed over night in past few months. And before I can understand and control the change, he was long gone.

"You have changed...." I said calmly, "You supported me before. You encouraged me when I wrote the entire play in college and got prize for it..."

"Yes... That was in college. But this is real life, Zee!" He said again, "It's different. You don't always get what you want."

"Wrong..." I said stubbornly, "You will get everything you dreamt about. You just need to work hard towards achieving it." Vihaan let out a deep frustrated sigh and I knew I was getting on his nerves.

"I don't know what's wrong with you..." He said gritting his teeth.

"Right... Something is wrong with me!" I said looking away in frustration, closing my eyes for a brief moment. I looked at Vihaan again.

"Vihaan, I guess..." I said as I tried to hold back my tears, "I guess we should take a break." I finally said without looking at him.

"Zee..." I heard him say as he moved his hand to grab mine but I was quick enough to take it back.

"No... It's needed. For us to understand." I said trying hard to not break in front of him, "To know things. Because I'm not getting you anymore. I'm not feeling connected to you anymore. I just don't know you anymore." I finished blinking away the tear from falling.

"I'm just doing what is best for us. Where did I go wrong?" He asked, his voice shaking at the end. There was pain and guilt visible in them. It broke my heart but I didn't have any choice. I have to do this, I've to be selfish this time, for my dreams. All my life I've lived like a puppet in my parent's hands. I choose not to live like that... Not anymore...

"I guess in trying to please my parents, somewhere you lost me," I said with a small smile with tears in my eyes. He knew everything and yet he took their side. He knew he's the only one for me, he knew I didn't have anyone I can call my own in this big city except for him. He knew I loved him more than my existence and still, he choose them over me.  Vihaan just looked at me with sadness in his eyes.

"Zee..." He said looking vulnerable, "Don't do this. I love you, you know that. And I won't ever do anything that will hurt you." He said as he got up from his seat across me and sat beside me, looking right back at me.

"I have loved you too, Vihaan..." I said as a tear finally escaped from my eye, "A lot... than I could ever get to tell you." I stopped for a moment not able to speak further. Vihaan just kept looking at me with pleading eyes.

"I guess I still do and I don't think I will ever be able to love anyone else like that." I finished and wiped the tear from my cheek.

"Then why?" He asked again in a low voice.

"I told you. I need time to think. If this is what I want." I said sighing as I finally managed to look at him. Vihaan just stared at me for a few moments before shifting in his seat.

"If you think blackmailing me this way can help you to get what you want..." Vihaan said still refusing to believe what I said is true. I let out a sigh.

"It's not blackmailing. I seriously need time to think about us. Actually about everything." I said closing my eyes for a bit. Vihaan didn't speak anything for some time. He looked lost, in his own thoughts.

"You wanted my support, right?" He asked as he looked at me with a small smile, "Fine. So right from this moment, I'll let you have your way." I just looked at him. He knew it better, that I'm too stubborn to listen to him. And right at the moment, it's better to let me have my way.

"You need some time. Okay." He said more like speaking to himself then he looked at me again as he brushed off a tear from my cheek, "Take all the time you want. But make sure... Make sure to come back to me. Alright?" He finished with a sad smile and I saw him blinking away tears in his eyes. His hand rested on my cheek as his thumb caressed them. I closed my eyes feeling the warmth of his hand.

I know he loves me and I know I love him too but still, I'm not sure, not after how he has been acting these past few months. He is the only guy I have dated till now. We went to the same school and then to college. We used to be best of friends, unbreakable from each other. He was my confidant and knew everything about me and my messed up life and still chose to be with me and helped me through it. I found myself falling in love with him. And then one day I proposed to him. To my surprise, he was already in love with me.

Then there was no looking back. I was the happiest girl on the whole planet. Vihaan always supported me, respected my every decision and loved me more than anyone else. When college ended and we were clear that we wanted to spend our entire life with each other we thought of involving our parents.

I was afraid that my parents will oppose my decision to be with Vihaan but instead, they loved him. For once I was truly happy and felt grateful to them but I didn't know they were going to turn it into my worst nightmare.

And there it started. My parents manipulated him and made sure that the only person who used to be on my side will end up in their team. I started seeing a change in him. He opposed my decisions. He didn't support me when I told him I wanted to be a writer. Instead, he started forcing my parent's decisions on me. I started feeling suffocated in his presence.

Soon after he joined our business. He got engrossed in everything beside me. He started giving less time to me. And whenever we spoke we either ended up fighting or discussing some business deal with our client. I knew it was on the verge of ending. I don't know what I want at the moment. I don't know if I could ever imagine my life without him.

I've only dreamed of living my life with him, there was never another man in my life. It's always been him. But the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with was the old Vihaan, the Vihaan before meeting my parents. I never thought they could manipulate him, it seems like I underestimated their skills. They did take him away from me and now I've no choice but this.

We should be clear about our relationship if we want to go somewhere with it. And that's why I want to take this chance for myself. I can't live like this forever.

"I hope so..." I said as I moved my gaze away from him.

***********

I picked up my favorite diary and put it in my bag as I closed it. I smiled brightly for the first time for months. Cody barked at me wagging his tail as he sat beside me on the bed. I laughed a little at him and put my forehead on his. He covered my face with sloppy kisses as I laughed a little harder.

I will be going to Delhi to live with my grandparents for time being. I have to face Vihaan and my parents every single day if I live here and with their presence, I won't be able to come up to any decision.

My parents were taken aback when I broke the news about my and Vihaan's break to them. They refused to listen to me and sided Vihaan which was kinda obvious. After all, he is the perfect son-in-law they could get, who listens to everything they say and is ready to do anything for them.

But with some efforts from Vihaan, they finally agreed to give me at most two months to get my head clear and come back to Vihaan without any other thoughts. I just nodded at what they said like I always do. I really need this time to get my shit together. Besides, I wanted to distance myself from everyday drama.

But that's not the only thing. I want to write. Writing has always been my passion. I have been writing plays, speeches, articles for school and college magazines and grabbed every opportunity that came my way. My teachers and friends have always praised me. They used to call me a gifted writer. That made me proud and happy. That made me dream about my future as one of the most successful writers out there.

But sadly my parents never supported it. For them, it was like I'm wasting the precious time of my life, where I should be focusing on learning more and more about our business. I really love handling business and learning new things about technology but I want to explore myself as a writer as well.

Let's say if writing is my passion then the business is my love. I want to be known as the famous businesswoman Zivah Chandra who is a well-known writer. Sounds crazy right? Even I don't think I am making any sense. Well, that's me. Welcome to my world.

So now, I'm going to try my luck. Let's see if this small break could bring any luck to my passion. I want to prove mom, dad and Vihaan wrong. I want to scream at them that I can achieve whatever I'm dreaming about. I'm capable of reaching my goal. But saying these things to them won't be of any help so instead, I will prove it to them.

It might take me some time but I will definitely reach there. I was determined to change my future. I've spend enough time listening to others now I need to listen to my heart.

I fell on the bed facing the ceiling while Cody decided to use me as a pillow and placed his head on my chest, lying beside me. I let out a sigh as I ran my hand over his head, caressing him as I got lost in thoughts.

I hope Delhi will bring the much-needed change for me in my life which I need the most right at this moment. I just hope it will be a life-changing experience and it will give a correct direction to my life and take me to where I truly belong... I can't wait to get lost in the crowd and finally find the true myself, which I have lost somewhere in trying to keep everyone around me pleased... Delhi here I come...

-----------------------------

Dare to live the
life you have
dreamed for
yourself.
Go forward and
make your dreams
come true.

------------------------------

✨Authors Note✨

So here we come again. With new book and new characters.

Tell us in comments what you think about this.

VOTE by pressing the ⭐

Excited and nervous but let's just get into this journey.

We will be back super soon.
Till then, bye.

Love,
Kritika and Ammu ❤️