A/N: After all the shit I put you through, this is a Jimin x Y/n focused chapter. Enjoy, there's a lot of character growth here.

┊ ˚➶ ｡˚𝓐𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓲𝓷 𝓶𝔂 𝓢𝓲𝓵𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓢𝓮𝓪 ˚｡➶˚┊

Jimin didn't know how to feel.

One week after Hoseok's death, Jimin found himself in Y/n's room. She had several breakdowns over Hoseok, all of which Jimin was present for. He didn't know how to comfort people. All he could do was hold her while her tears stained his tunics.

She had just had a breakdown an hour ago. They had been silent ever since. She laid on his bare chest, her finger tracing over his skin while he kept his arm wrapped around her back. Their legs were tangled together, refusing to part. He kissed the top of her head as he loved to do, moving his other arm so it could hold her too.

"Jimin?" she asked. For the first time, he didn't hate the sound of his name. It sounded heavenly when it fell from her lips.

"What's wrong?"

"Can you kiss me?"

Without hesitation, he tilted her chin up and kissed her. He didn't stop until she pulled away and rested her hands on his chest again. He wanted to peek into her mind and see what was wrong, but he couldn't. Not even her eyes gave away what she was thinking.

"I can't read your mind, princess," he whispered, stroking her hair. "Any chance you'll tell me what's going on if I ask nicely?"

Much to his surprise, she didn't have a witty remark. She'd normally say 'You know how to ask nicely?', or something along those lines. Instead, she sighed and curled up against him, closing her eyes.

"You were right."

As much as he loved hearing those words, he knew it wasn't the time to tease her. He chose to keep brushing her hair with his four-fingered hand, hoping she would continue.

"The guards working for the Emperor, they're innocent in all this. They're just doing their jobs, getting their paychecks, and going home to their families. Families I thought I was fighting for. Instead, I'm tearing them apart," Y/n whispered, her body trembling. "But I don't know what to do. If I stop, Hoseok's death means nothing. Our fight means nothing. How many people do we have to sacrifice for freedom? Why do we need to sacrifice them for freedom? I want it to stop. I want it all to stop."

"Shh," he murmured, rubbing her back with one hand while his other stayed tangled in her locks. "We're so close, honey. We're so close to winning this war. We've made them hurt. The Tower, the farm, the vault... there aren't many places the Emperor can hide. We're winning, Y/n. Our fight means something. It means something to the people struggling to stay alive. It means something to your friends. It means something to Jihyun." He paused to make sure she was as close to him as she could get. He kissed her forehead and dropped his voice to a whisper. "It means something to me."

She kept her head pressed against his chest. He adored the intimacy, but he knew he was wrong for thinking that during one of her vulnerable moments. All he wanted was to hold her. He wished there were better words to express how he felt.

"Jimin?" she asked, and he nodded in hopes it'd give her encouragement to speak. "Can you distract me?"

"From?"

"Everything."

He stroked her hair. "How? Should I tell you a story?"

"No. You know what I mean."

He did, but he didn't want to overstep, just in case he was reading the room wrong. When he got the verbal confirmation he needed, he kissed her and climbed on top of her. The few clothes they had left fell to the ground, Jimin making love to her. He stayed close to her and whispered sweet nothings against her lips.

"Hold onto me, princess," he whispered, panting as he kept going. He was gentle, which was odd for them. He didn't want to overwhelm her. All he wanted was to give her pleasure. Pleasure that would make her forget about the world for a few minutes.

Jimin made sure to pace himself so it could last as long as possible. They rolled around, tangling up with each other and kissing as often as they could. He skimmed his fingers down her figure. He left marks on her chest. She softly moaned and asked him to keep going.

By the time they were done, they were both sweating and refusing to part from one another. They kissed as much as they could. Finally, they calmed down and cuddled. He shut his eyes, holding her against his chest. He made sure her hand was on his heart, feeling how steady it was. Jimin was familiar with breakdowns and panic attacks. Thanks to that experience, he knew they could come suddenly. He hoped by having her feel his calm state, that'd prevent them. Or, at the very least, help.

Y/n broke their long silence by tapping on his skin. "Jimin?"

"Are you okay? Do you need water?"

"No, I'm okay. Thank you." She paused, keeping her head on his body. "Do you think you can still tell me a story?"

He tried to fight his grin, but he knew it was impossible. "My dad took me hunting when I was a kid. I didn't know it then, but my family was suffering just like everyone else. They were living in poverty and famine. My dad taught me to hunt, and I thought it was just a silly trip. He taught me how to survive in the woods, and my mom taught me how to cook whatever I caught."

"Were you good at it?"

"No, I was pretty terrible. I was just a kid, y'know? Didn't have any sense of life and death. I remember when my mom was pregnant with Jihyun. My dad took me out hunting more, something about needing food for the baby. I didn't know it at the time, but I was already taking care of my little brother."

"Does he know that?"

Jimin sighed. "No. He was never taught about life. I was young when the Emperor killed my parents, but Jihyun was even younger. I doubt he remembers it. He probably thinks the Emperor is our dad, and maybe he's right. The Emperor is the only father-figure I've had. My dad is a distant memory I'll forget by the time I'm forty."

"The Emperor doesn't deserve you," she said, putting her chin on his chest so their eyes could lock. "I know you're a good man, Jimin."

"I'm not. I kill people. It doesn't matter the reason-"

"It does matter," she interrupted, softly. "It's easy to say killing isn't justified in any case, but you didn't have a choice. You were stolen from a healthy life where you would've stayed with your family and had a beautiful little brother to take care of. All those people you killed were actually killed by the Emperor. None of that death would have happened if the Emperor didn't steal you. If he didn't hurt you." She rubbed her thumb back and forth on his chest. "Jimin, I don't think you realize how much you've been through."

"I do."

"You don't. You think it's normal," she said. He hesitated, and that had her nodding. "When you told me about the Emperor selling you, I never felt so disgusted in my life. I didn't even particularly like you back then, but I couldn't imagine anyone going through that. He violated you. He took everything from you." She took his left hand, kissing the stub that replaced his ring finger. "Marriage, your body, your mind, even your brother. Do you even know what your favorite food is? Or your dream job?"

"I..."

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to bring up painful thoughts."

"No, it's good that you did," he said, twirling a strand of her hair. "I've never thought about it before. I don't really think about me. I've always thought about pleasing the Emperor and protecting Jihyun." He paused, hoping no tears would hit his eyes. "My whole life, I've wanted freedom. I've fought so much that I never stopped to think what I'd do when I get it."

"Can I help?" she asked, her tone gentle. Comforting.

She had such a sweet voice. It had him wanting nothing more than to keep her by his side for as long as he could. Maybe he didn't deserve it after all the pain he had caused. Or maybe he did deserve it due to all the pain he had endured. It was strange, really. He never thought that he'd deserve anything good. But now, staring into her eyes, he found himself smiling.

"I'd love nothing more."

┊ ˚➶ ｡˚˚｡➶˚┊

He laughed.

"And then Jihyun said he wouldn't let me go on my own, so he picked up a rock and begged me to let him come with," Jimin said, holding his bow as he stepped on a twig. There were no animals around except for Mimos, but he didn't feel like killing the poor birds. They went through enough. "I had to make him sit. Like, physically make him. He didn't talk to me for three days."

Y/n softly smiled, but it didn't meet her eyes. Jimin led her deeper into the forest, keeping an arrow loaded on the off chance they actually found prey. Winter was coming, which meant they could get snowfall. Could.

It had been almost two months since the vault heist. Y/n was on her feet but limping here and there. Jimin's theory was right: the Emperor didn't bother hurting Jihyun. He was too valuable to injure. If Emperor Donovan ever wanted Jimin to break, he'd need Jihyun. No one would look at the vault's camera footage and think Jimin would give his friends up. He killed every last guard in sight to save Y/n. He risked everything to save her. The Emperor could put two and two together.

Beyond that, Jimin was worried about Namjoon. Jimin broke his word, which meant Namjoon would be out for blood. Luckily, he didn't have any dirt on Jimin. But that was the end of the good news. If Namjoon found Jimin, there was no telling what wrath awaited him. The odds were, Namjoon wouldn't show mercy no matter what the Emperor said. Namjoon worked for his brothers, not the Emperor. And his brothers were killed by Park Jimin.

"Did I ever tell you about the time I hunted a rogue pack of Hellsirs by myself?" he asked, Y/n shrugging. He took it as a no. "Well, it was the day after my birthday. I just turned the legal drinking age, so you can imagine how shit-faced I was that night."

"Why do they even bother with a drinking age? Everyone drinks before eighteen anyway."

"I know I did," Jimin replied with a whistle. He gave up on finding prey. Instead, he grabbed a rock and threw it. It banged off a tree, Mimos flying out. Although he felt bad, he hit one through the eyes with an arrow. The rebellion needed whatever meat it could find. "But anyway, I went out to the outskirts to do a patrol. I thought it'd be uneventful cause, y'know, it's the outskirts. I needed an uneventful day after the night I had. But, of course, there were Hellsirs on the loose."

Y/n didn't answer when he broke off, picking up the dead Mimo. It had a beautiful, colorful coat. He tied it to his utility belt. Y/n had Shadow with her, but Jimin figured he'd tie all the game to the Leeka later. Shadow deserved a break.

"I ran after the four of them. Took them out by myself. Almost lost another finger though. I think that was the only time the Emperor was genuinely impressed by me. Or, at least, the only time he didn't hide it." He glanced back at her, noticing how her eyes were on the ground. "Hey princess?" She nodded. "Did you ever play any games growing up?"

She shook her head, pulling on Shadow to get her over a particularly large log. Jimin almost tripped over his feet since he was too busy staring at Y/n. He slowed his pace so he could be closer to her.

"Then I'll have to teach you. My brother and I made a bunch of games to pass the time. We made a rock game I think you'd like. It's about causing as much destruction as possible. Oh, and I'll never forget the time I snuck into Yoongi's cabin and stole his guitar. Learned how to play terrible notes. Yoongi ended up teaching me anyway. I'll get you a guitar and teach you to play, what do you think?" She didn't answer. "Y/n?" Still, nothing. "Y/n?"

She finally snapped up. "What?"

"Guitar. Want to learn to play?"

"Oh. Sure."

He grabbed Shadow's reins and pulled, forcing her to stop. Y/n stopped with her, meeting Jimin's gaze. She had such an innocent, curious look in her eyes. He almost didn't want to hurt it, but he knew he had to address it.

"You're quieter than usual today," he said.

"Just thinking. I promised I'd save your brother, so I need to plan."

"Take a break. Walk in the woods with me and pretend we're being productive." He paused, noticing she already averted her eyes and fell back into her thoughts. He wrapped his bow around himself, patting Shadow as he passed her. When he approached Y/n, she didn't peek up like she had in the past. Jimin gently lifted her chin, leaning down to kiss her.

She kissed back, although she was hesitant. He pulled back right away, knitting his brows together. Even though he expected something, anything, she didn't speak and went back to fiddling with her fingers.

There were more Mimos. Jimin sighed and moved away, shooting another and collecting it. They stayed there in silence for a few minutes, Jimin tying the game around Shadow's saddle. Then, he stepped away, keeping his eyes on his woman.

"Hey," he said, her peeping up at that. "Enough about me. What about you?"

"What?"

"What's your favorite memory?"

"I don't have one-"

"I hate to break it to you princess, but I'm not going to believe that," he interrupted, her taking a moment before giving in.

"The summer festival. The only good thing the Emperor ever did."

"Ah, I remember that. Seven years ago. I went as the lead guard."

"I don't remember seeing you there," she said, leaning against Shadow. Shadow neighed and licked Y/n with her large tongue. Y/n cracked a small smile at that. "Jungkook and I went together. We ran around the City and ate everything. To this day, that's still the best I've ever eaten. I've never had so much food in my life. Jungkook sang to the locals and got some money for it. He ended up giving it all to me." Y/n broke off to sniffle, Shadow rubbing her head against Y/n's. "I wish we could have another summer festival. Just one more. It was the only time I ever felt like I was free."

"You'll get another," Jimin whispered. "I promise."

"You think?"

"I'll make sure you do. When we free New Theon, I'll host one. What do you think?"

She smiled. "Will you take me to it?"

"I'd love to." He held her hand, rubbing his thumb across her skin. "Let's get a few more Mimos and get out of here." Jimin turned and took his bow, loading it up. "I'm ready. Throw a rock?"

Y/n did, Jimin firing and hitting another. They repeated the process several times. They ended up with eight corpses, Jimin tying them to Shadow and preparing to leave. Then, Y/n came over and tugged on the end of his tunic.

"What is it, princess?"

"Can we stay out here a little longer?" she asked in a mumble.

He kissed her forehead, grinning. "Where do you want to go?"

"Maybe we just sit and talk for a little while."

"Okay honey, this way."

Together, they went to a clearing not far from them. Shadow neighed and stayed with Y/n the entire time. Jimin had to admit he found it adorable. His two girls were bonding.

"Right here," he said, pointing to the logs. They sat, Shadow happily prancing around and pausing every once in a while to lick Y/n's face. "What do you want to talk about?"

She leaned her head against him, closing her eyes and cuddling with him. "You. Tell me another story."

He chuckled and wrapped an arm around her, resting his head on top of hers. "About what?"

"What did little Jimin want?"

"Little Jimin was an adventurer," Jimin whispered, slowly rocking her back and forth. "He wanted to travel the world with his family and see everything out there. Especially the Islands."

"Would it be weird if I took you there?"

He laughed, kissing her head. He lingered there. "Of course not. You're my family now."

She picked her head up and grinned. "I am?"

"You are." He paused, huffing. "Only you though. Not Jungkook."

"Why did you specifically say Jungkook-"

"Anyway," Jimin interrupted, whistling as if that'd distract her. 

She laughed, her eyes crinkling. He couldn't resist: he kissed her. She ended up on his lap, the two making out while the wind brushed by. They stayed like that for a few minutes. He didn't keep count until his lungs begged him to pull away.

She placed both her hands on his cheeks. "I'd love to make out with you, but I want to know more about baby Jimin."

"I don't remember baby Jimin-"

"You know what I mean."

He snickered. "Baby Jimin had dreams. You may not believe me, but little Jimin was selfless."

"You're right, I don't believe you."

"Oh shush. Little Jimin wanted to help his parents and give them a vacation. He didn't know anything about New Theon yet. All he wanted was to help his parents and give them happiness."

"Little Jimin sounds adorable," she said, Jimin smiling.

"You think?"

"Little Jimin didn't decapitate people with a smile, so yeah. I wonder what little you looked like."

"Me but a little smaller. I didn't grow much, princess."

She laughed, snuggling up with him. "That means our kids will be cursed with shortness."

He rubbed her arm, cherishing their proximity. "We're having kids?"

"I was kidding. I don't care how attractive you are, I'm not pushing anything out of me. Shadow is our kid." As if on cue, she licked Y/n's face. "She doesn't whine or cry. Much better."

Jimin snorted. "I'm fine with that. Not sure New Theon would even be free while we're young enough to have kids."

"We'll free it soon. I know we will. I have our next plan in mind."

"Do I get to know it?"

"You're my right hand," she said, Jimin tilting his head at that. "Why are you surprised? Who else would be my right hand?"

"Literally anyone else-"

"Jungkook is intelligence, he has no place in command. Jin is our promo guy, Kastor is old, and Taehyung's Taehyung. You're a fighter and someone I trust. I wouldn't trust other rebels with this, though we will need to start recruiting to get more higher-ups."

"I see what you mean," he said. He paused, Shadow coming in front of them and laying down. He took out his flask, but Y/n snatched it out of his hands. "Damn, feisty."

"Shush. You're distracting me." She took a swig from his flask without asking. "The plan I came up with. You want to tell me how dumb it is?"

"Proving you wrong? Oh I'd love to," he said, taking his flask back and tossing some alcohol on the ground for Shadow. She lapped it up without complaint.

"I want to attack the Emperor's Flagship."

Jimin almost reverted back to Park for a moment. "You want to do what?!"

"It's near Mount Moros. It's the only thing stopping them from attacking New Theon consistently. If we take it out, Mount Moros will be in our debt. The thing is, it'd be nice if they were on our side now. If we could use Mount Moros as a base, we can flank the ship. They'll never see it coming."

"That is the dumbest idea I've ever heard-"

"I won't be going."

"That's the smartest plan ever. How can I help?"

"You're going to lead the charge and infiltrate the ship. Destroy it. Burn it. Do whatever you have to do," she said. Jimin opened his mouth, but she answered before he could ask the question. "I'm scared of the ocean, not to mention I can't swim. If anything goes wrong..."

"I'll teach you to swim."

"I really don't want to learn. I can barely tolerate the lake. Water terrifies me, so let's keep me away from it."

"But don't we need you there?" he asked. "You're the leader of the rebellion. You're one of our best fighters and it's your plan. Without you, we won't have direction."

"You'll be there."

"I'm a fighter, not a leader. I need you there."

"Didn't you just call it a smart plan because I said I wasn't going?"

"That was before I thought about it. Come on, you know me, I'm not the smartest in the rebellion," Jimin replied, keeping his head pressed against hers. Shadow finished her drink and got up, nudging Jimin. That meant she wanted to go home. "Shadow's getting antsy. Let's get back. We can talk more in my room, how about that?"

She stayed quiet for a beat. "Okay."

He helped her onto Shadow, getting on after she was secure. Together, they went home. They went straight to his room, plopping down together. She grabbed at his clothes, and they ended up having sex before they even bothered with talking. He didn't know if she needed an escape or if she genuinely couldn't keep her hands off him. Either way, he was happy to oblige.

Y/n didn't want to stay in his room, much to his dismay. They ended up getting changed and going outside to meet with Taehyung and Jin. Kastor and Jungkook were nowhere to be found, but Jimin was sure they were sleeping like the grumpy men they were.

"Hey," Jin said, his voice directed at Y/n. "How you feeling? You're walking better."

"The specialists from Topside gave me exercises to help. They're living near the end of Flerry, by the lake. You should join them. You're the best doctor we have. You might even beat Topside at this point."

"Not sure about that, I never really went to school. Everything I know is thanks to Taehyung getting injured all the time."

"Hey!" Tae whined, whacking Jin's shoulder. "That's not true, you did training at Topside. What, that was ten years ago now?"

"I didn't know you guys traveled to Topside so much," Jimin said.

"We've been traveling more recently," Y/n replied. "With Seulgi... even after all these months, we still don't know what they did to her. She won't talk about it. It's like she's completely shut down."

"Have you told her about Hoseok?"

"We had to, that's not something we could hide from her. She hasn't spoken to anyone in two weeks," Tae said, picking at the scabs on his arm. "I don't think she's going to make it."

"She's rejected most advances. Even the best at Topside can't reverse her mental conditioning," Jin said, slumping his shoulders. "The Emperor knows what he's doing. He's using psychological warfare. Destroying our minds instead of our bodies."

"In most cases, he likes to do both," Jimin said with a tight smile. "But let's stop talking about it, we've already been through enough depressing shit. Let's talk about the plan."

"We still have a while until it happens," Tae said. "We're training soldiers now. As many as we can."

"You're training soldiers and haven't gotten me involved yet?"

"We will, we're doing basic training first, then you can teach them whatever fucked up shit the Emperor put you up to."

Jimin grinned. "Decapitation and mutilation."

"I hate you," Jin said. "Is it too late to put him back in the castle?"

"Don't joke about that," Y/n snapped, Jin falling quiet. "Jimin's right, we need to talk about the plan. We still have a few months before the siege, but I want to see if we can get Moros involved before that. We'll need their help. We only have a handful of higher-ups. Let's change that."

"It's not like we're the only ones doing anything," Jin said, pulling out a hologram. It was the only one they had, and it was what they used to film promos. He played a video of rebels protesting in the streets of the City. It ended with the protestors getting killed by Kim Namjoon. "We're growing stronger every day. After we take out the Emperor's Flagship, we can take out the castle. He'll have no navy to come support him."

"Beyond that, the City will turn more in our favor. The City is full of hypocrites who just want to win. If they see the rebellion is winning, they'll choose our side," Tae threw in. Jimin just noticed the man had a half-full cup of hot chocolate. "The City is the last obstacle. When we tackle it..."

"Nothing can stop us from taking over New Theon," Y/n finished.

"Except the giant army in the castle. Oh, and the guards in training behind the castle. There's only hundreds of guards we'd have to go through. Other than that, no biggie," Jimin said, the others glaring. "What?"

"He needs to work on his people skills," Jin said.

Jimin scoffed. "You need to work on your cooking skills."

"What the fuck did you just say about my cooking you piece of shit-"

"Jin!" Tae shouted, but the man was already going for Jimin's throat. Y/n held him back, not that it mattered. Everyone knew who'd win that fight.

While Jin writhed in Y/n's grasp, Kastor and Jungkook came out. They didn't bother with glancing in Jin's direction. Jungkook sat next to Taehyung as Kastor stood off to the side. Soon enough, Jin calmed down, and they discussed dinner. They cooked together. Thanks to how many Mimos Jimin killed, they all had a decent-sized portion. That meant they didn't have to lie to Jungkook this time. That also meant they could eat together.

Jimin sat by Y/n and ate his dinner, occasionally peeking around at the others. Jin and Taehyung were the most talkative. Jin told a story about how he stole meat from his local butcher when he was a kid. Taehyung laughed the loudest and never left Jin alone. Jungkook joined in here and there, sprinkling in details about how Jin and him met. Y/n and Jimin stayed quiet. Kastor, to no one's surprise, only watched with a half-smile he tried to hide.

Jimin kept his eyes on the scene. Jungkook, Taehyung, and Jin were laughing and smiling. As soon as Y/n was done eating, she pressed her head on Jimin's shoulder, and he wrapped an arm around her to keep her close. Kastor ended up chuckling at something Jin said. Jimin found himself doing the same. And as he looked around, he realized he had never had a night like this before. A night where he enjoyed himself with people he liked. Some more than others, but all of them were people he considered his friends.

Maybe this was what family felt like.

┊ ˚➶ ｡˚𝓐𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓲𝓷 𝓶𝔂 𝓢𝓲𝓵𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓢𝓮𝓪 ˚｡➶˚┊

A/N: The first chapter where Jimin refers to himself as Jimin 🥹🥹🥹