why the frikk did I decide to make Echoing Falls before the og GilVier story??

and why does this make more sense to me??

one would think that doing the writings in chronological order would make more sense, but my brain likes to work backward better ig

maybe past me thought it would make the readers more interested in Gilbert's past life and want to know more about his relationship with Xavier, who was definitely mentioned quite a few times in Echoing Falls, but idk some would say that chronological order world make sense, but I say no

whatever it is I'm blaming it on the emotional intensity is less intense (or less focused upon) in Echoing Falls than the other yet to be named GilVier story, despite EF having more death and crap compared to the other, which will probably have no death tbh

tbh the only reason I wanted to complain was because I can't really write cute GilVier scenes when they're in completely different territories

B U T  I kinda wanted to keep this as a secret until later on but I'm weak sO

so of course there are chapters labeled numerically, like 1, 2, 3, yadda yadda

but every couple chapters, there would be a chapter labled "Dear Gilbert" or "Dear Xavier," which are essentially letters from one to another

not only does it include the deep connection between the two, but it also shares Gilbert's emotional frustrations, Xavier's emotional frustrations, what's going on in his everyday life, and what's going on in the kingdom's economy to fund the war

plus, Xavier complaining about how the Prerissian government sUccs

Xavier likes to complain

also spoiler alert but while Gilbert was away Xavier picked up embroidery and made a cute lil thing for his boi

the lil thing is essential for a particular scene that I already have planned towards the end of the book that has a lot of meaning to me but other people may not find all too significant

idk how people will take it if they pay any attention to it at all but I LOVE adding little things like that to stories

it makes me LIVE it's my favorite thing ever I love it <33

so before I told myself I was gonna get a move on with my writing by writing at least 1,000 words a day

and yeah, that worked for a little while, but then eventually I wasn't able to fulfill that and it started stressing me out, so I kinda stopped doing it all together for a while and just stuck with overall world building

but now I'm just gonna stick to writing SOME of it every day, whether it be a little or a lot, cause that's better than nothing

I tend to overshoot my skills a lot tbh

like when I first tried to teach myself guitar, I wanted to learn how to play Wanted Dead or Alive in like a week with no previous experience, and that didn't work and left me to drop it for probably months lmao

I still need to learn how to slow my roll for several things, but I'm working on it, my pacing is slowly getting better

I'm nOt ready for school tho, and actually I think I'm gonna spend tomorrow working on a good amount of summer hw if my brain chemicals cooperate with me

brain chemicals have been pretty out of wack lately since Band Camp and school comming soon, which all includes more social interaction, which I'm not complaining about Band Camp cause it's fun as heck, but still social interactions are tiring whether it's enjoyable or not

introversion whOOP

also this upcoming school year is stressing me out cause I know for a fact I need to make some big changes if I'm gonna go through this year without negatively hurting my mental health or intellecutal pursuit, whether it be scholarly or personally 

power school isn't up either, and ik it'll take either this upcomming week or next week for it to come out with our new schedules, and I don't even know if I'll finish the Anatomy and Physiology hw in time since I only planned for it to be a backup, but after thinking it through, the class would be VERY helpful when it comes to animal designs for my personal project and making sure everything makes sense when creating new species for their intended purposes

fictional creatures that make sense gives me life

but yee probably one of my favorite things is how Mylea (idk if I mentioned her before but she's one of Gilbert's buddies) makes fun of Gilbert's homosexuality, and she makes fun of relationships in general cause she's an Asexual Aromantic, but it's never gonna be explicitly shared in the story

people can probably guess tho, but I want it to be obvious but not in the reader's face

lmao Gilbert has the big gay