I am genuinely worried about my English presentation Thursday

The last presentation I've done by myself was for last year's health class, and that caused so many things to go downhill, it scares me

I know I'm probably worrying for no reason, but I just can't help but think

Although other things are getting better, the flashbacks keep getting worse: gradually more frequent and intense, little by little

Today one of them happened at lunch, and I almost cried, but I couldn't, and I think I was successful at hiding it, but what if I can't hide it for Thursday?

If one of them happens during a period of higher stress, it just keeps on coming, and they come back shortly afterwards, and I don't know if I'll be able to pull back from it

I've been dealing with these flashbacks for a while now, but if it keeps up like this, I'll hafta talk to someone about it, and I'll be able to soon enough

I just need to get through it as it comes, I just hope I can make it until I'm able to talk to who I need to talk to

I don't know what I'll do if it happens; I'm hoping I can just take a deep breath and continue, but if it happens like last time, I'm either going to break down or take too much time

Maybe I'll give a few teachers in mind a heads up in case I really do break down and need to get out, just in case, but I'm not sure

I don't want to go back, so I want to be prepared in case it happens

Hopefully it wouldn't be too much of a problem as time goes on so that it wouldn't get worse as we do more speeches

It sucks that most of the time, they happen completely randomly. I was having a decent day today, but then when lunch happend, the flashback came, and I had to concentrate on keeping it together or else big things would happen. I don't want to go back

Most of the time they're not too much of a problem, I'm not going to go too much into depth since I need sleep, but I'm crossing my fingers for Thursday