* MMXVII * 

I conquered my own world,

With a few pieces of titanium,

Straightening up my life. 

I endured the worst pain,

Yet learnt the best lesson...

Perseverance. 

I threw fear away,

Pushing it clumsily to the side,

With trembling fingers. 

Sentenced to the bed,

Lying in scratchy white sheets,

Eight pillows. 

I listened to stories,

An auburn haired girl,

With two plaits. 

I fell alseep,

With friends by my side,

Staring at the pictures and cards. 

A new day brought a few extra steps,

And a paler face,

But more heart. 

My mothers hair a mess,

Her worried expression,

The softness of her hand. 

My fathers arms,

Resembling Jesus',

As prayer left his lips. 

My sisters' smiles,

A damp flannel being pressed,

To my sweating forehead. 

Water dripping my back,

Naked yet clothed,

Nurse saw past my pain.

Tears and tears and tears,

"Don't want to call the nurse." 

"Don't want to see you hurting." 

Couldn't cough,

The world momentarily stopped,

Every time I sneezed. 

They read aloud to me. 

Words filling my brain,

But I wanted to hold the book. 

Sitting in pain,

Watching the others swim. 

I think, "Why?" 

Ordered to bed,

For three straight days,

Surgeon said, "You've been over-doing it." 

Weeks pass,

Best friends call me,

Tell me what's happening at school. 

I'm home. 

Overwhelmed. 

"Just want to be normal." 

I go to school, 

Everyone stops,

Everyone looks at me a second longer. 

I get by,

Cushions, friends, stairs,

Catching up with work. 

Stare in the mirror,

Craning my neck. 

30cm scar. 

Half days at school,

Melt into full. 

Melt into a whole week. 

"It's like she never left." 

Back to school properly. 

No one knows what I've really done. 

Finally back to normality,

Sick of the comments,

"She needs to put on weight." 

Friends and family. 

They are what matters. 

They never let go of my hand. 

Stared in the mirror again. 

The rest of my life it'll be there. 

My battle scar. 

"How is she going?" 

"Good." 

Nothing to say. 

Healed completely.

No more x-rays,

Too much radiation. 

No one understands but me. 

What would they do if they did?

I'm too scared. 

"Can you do it?"

"No, I can't even touch my toes."

"Oh." 

Some people threw it aside,

Like it was nothing...

It made me wonder...

"Scoliosis?" 

"Yes."

A blank stare. 

How much people cared varied. 

"You poor thing, you're so young." 

"Usain Bolt has scoliosis," a shrug. 

Most importantly,

I'm proud of myself. 

It was my battle, and I won. 

"We are more than conquerors..." 

No one shall rain,

On my parade. 

I can die accomplished,

Because I killed pain.

Pierced, straight through the heart.

Goodbye,

I'll talk to you later,

Maybe next year.

Come to me,

Give me everything you got...

MMXVIII.... 

Once I wanted to wake up... as if it never happened. And here I am, glad that it did. 

"I can do all things through him who gives me strength." 

- Phillipians 4:13

("I am Titanium" is being delayed... wanted to publish on 12 month anniversary but no can do. Maybe 13 months? ) 

... that was a very unstructured, messy poem I just made up on the spot. Sorry.