"John?"

I didn't turn around, only continued sobbing into my hands.

There was a sense of betrayal in my heart that I had never felt before. Why, why had they said those things about me, where I could plainly see them?

"John, please, what's wrong?"

"Nu uh," I said tearfully. I didn't want to talk about it.

"John--"

"NO!" I yelled, never facing him. I knew it was Alex. I knew his voice.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, and a large quilt fall around my body. "John, please, what's wrong?"

How could I answer him?

"Come on, let's go lay down." I nodded. That sounded nice.

He wheeled me over to my bed and laid me down and covered me up with the quilt, then laid down next to me and snuggled up against my side. I looked at him questioningly. He noticed my expression.

"Studies say that guys who have really good friendships with other guys and cuddle with them like girls do with each other have longer lifespans," he explained gently. "I don't know about you, but I intend to live past 30."

I laughed. "Uh huh."

We laid there, cuddling for awhile, soaking in the other's presence.

He was so warm and soft. He smelled like coffee and paper, along with the most subtle scent of sea salt.

Then it began raining.

I felt my eyes begin to grow heavy. I had always loved to sleep while it was raining. The sound of the gentle pitter-patter on the roof was rhythmic and soft and painted the sky outside a gentle gray. The large window was splattered with rain drops that trailed down the glass, leaving streaks of water.

I sighed and buried myself further into Alex's side.

But then I noticed how tense he was.

He was visibly shaking, the whites of his eyes showing. His breathing grew heavier with every passing moment.

"J-John?" he said shakily after a moment. "C-Can I sleep with you tonight?"

I was gonna make a joke, but I decided against it. "Uh huh."

He instantly curled up to my side and buried his head in the crook of my arm. Tears began to flow down his face like the raindrops on the window glass.

"Alec?" I whispered. "Whas wrong?"

"I hate storms," he whispered, his voice strained. "I survived a hurricane when I was 13. I take medication for my PTSD, but the Washington's haven't gotten my file yet because of a mistake in the foster system. I'm 16, soon to be 17 in January. I graduated early from high school. How old are you?"

"Seventeen," I forced out, making sure to articulate the t sound.

He grinned at me, still obviously a little scared. "You've gotten a lot better in the last week."

I gave a half-hearted smile. I felt him reach up to play with my hair, running his fingers through the strands gently.

After a few minutes, I felt him fall asleep next to me, still cuddled up to my side. I closed my eyes and fell asleep, too.

~.~

"Oh. Well, then."

My eyes shot open, and I turned to see Martha at the door, eyes wide.

"Um, what's happening there?"

I shrugged.

Alex yawned and turned over so that he faced me, then buried his face in my chest. Martha and I shared a glance.

"I never saw anything," Martha said, then turned around, where she made sure I saw her fingers (very visibly) crossed behind her back.

I choked back a laugh as she walked out of the room.

Alex wrapped his arm around my chest and held me close. I didn't mind at all, but at the same time, the blush was creeping into my cheeks.

I had a raging crush on this boy and I might never be able to tell him.

"Don't..." Alex muttered, shifting against me. "Don't touch him... S-stop.... P-p-please.... I love him...."

He hugged me tighter.

"J-John..." he whispered, tears falling down his face. "I-I'm sorry.... Please.... I love...."

His eyes flew open, and his breath came in heaving gasps. His eyes met mine, and he relaxed somewhat.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly. "I-I'm sorry, I just had a bad dream."

"I okay," I said, being careful to pronounce every syllable.

Alex didn't move but instead laid his head back down in the crook of my neck. He hugged me again and whispered very softly, "I won't let him touch you anymore."