So, two days ago I changed my name from UltimateNerdess to InvisibleZebra. Why did I do this? Well, I have a saying, I suppose a mantra of sorts. (I'm not sure if it really counts as one, but sometimes it's comforting and motivating for me) 

"I am the invisible zebra." 

This saying pertains to one facet of my identity. If you're new to my account, you may not know this, but I have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome. It's a connective tissue disorder that stems from a genetic mutation, specifically for me it's the genetic mutation that causes double jointness and hyper mobility. Now this doesn't mean that every person who is hyper mobile has Ehlers Danlos. Ehlers Danlos has multiple types and not all of them include Hyper Mobility, but for me and people who have the same type (type III in case you're wondering) the collagen that is effected is the collagen that keeps joints connected, so i sublex super SUPER easily. Anyway, that's unimportant. What is important is that the awareness ribbon for EDS is zebra striped, hence the Zebra part of my new name. 

We use zebra stripes because of the saying (which i just found out is an American medical saying from the 50s') "When you hear hoofbeats, think horses not zebras." which means to think of the simple diagnosis first and not the rare one. This makes sense generally, but unfortunately the new norm is to only think of the 'horse' and not the 'zebra.' This combined with the fact that EDS is a rare diagnosis that is rarely diagnosed correctly the first time, has brought the EDS community to associate themselves with zebras. So, I call myself a zebra with pride! :D But that still leaves the 'Invisible' part of the name. 

Weirdly enough the 'Invisible' part has multiple meanings for me. The first is the most obvious, which is that I have many invisible illnesses (illnesses that do not have visible signs that it is exists within the person) EDS does count as one. What's less obvious is that for a long time, I was sort of an invisible human. I am incredibly introverted, anxious in social situations, and could often go unnoticed in school trips and the like. Now I let myself become invisible to the point of completely pulling myself out of social interactions, which proved incredibly unhealthy. But these days I have found a certain amount of invisibility is nice. I like being invisible, with my small group of friends who are practically a second family to me. I enjoy being alone every once and a while; being able to blare music through an empty house is one of my favorite feelings! That's why i chose 'invisible' to be a part of my name. 

Invisiblezebra

That is who I am!