English double.
First two periods of the new school year - 2015.
The one I'd secretly dubbed:
The Year of Living Miserably.
So chatter-jittery.
So ludicrously nervy.
Come on, Joy, shake it up -
how many years have you been teaching?
Were this a panto,
the audience would bray out:
'Too many! Hehehe, haw, haw, haw'.
Oh dear, I am well prepared,
I have designed a scaffolding sheet
for task 1.
I know it's good, I know it's good, but........
I have stimulus examples, several websites
and I know I can pull a rabbit from a hat
if all turns to s... still......
Mental slap across the face:
Be firm, be calm, channel confidence,
It's not like they don't know you,
in any case.

Ah, but they only know me as the nice library lady who orders in any book they request, who can recommend any number of great reads because she has read them, the woman on the front desk who will drop everything to trouble shoot their laptop issues or hire out and explain ICT equipment or advise a worthwhile website or interpret a badly designed worksheet and point out helpful resources.

They don't know this new woman.
The English teacher - Mrs. Reid,
they have never encountered her,
for although the literacy programs are down to me
and they have in the past
worked wonderfully with me
in Literature Circles and Book in a Bag, Reading in Pairs
and the Premier's Reading Challenge,
they do not associate me with formal teaching
and it is formal teaching
they have been trained
to respect.
I'm a wreck. This won't do.
Mental slap across the face. Breeeeathe, silly woman, breeeeathe.
Repeat mantra:
It's not personal. They're just kids being kids. There is good in all of them.
Yes, yes and breathe. Don't forget to...
breathe.

Now get in there and teach.