Is this the end?

Beomgyu and Soobin don't read for almost two weeks. It's almost August, and Soobin knows life for Beomgyu is likely becoming more hectic as he prepares for school, so Soobin tries not to bother him. However, those two weeks, not texting or calling or going to the beach, are some of the most painful days Soobin has ever experienced. Part of him wants to go over to Beomgyu's house, just knock on the door or throw rocks at his window, just to remind him Soobin was thinking about him; but his pride got the better of him, and he kept his distance.

Until one weekend, things bubble over, curiosity eating him alive, and he knocks on Beomgyu's door just to make sure everything is okay.

"Hi," Soobin says, holding on tight to the towels beneath his arm. Beomgyu slowly blinks, likely awaiting an explanation as to why Soobin was knocking on his door after all this time. He looks tired; his hair is unbrushed, there's a little stubble on his face, and he's still in his pajamas. He coughs before wiping his eyes. "I'm going to your beach. If you want to join me."

Before Soobin knows it, they're in his car, Beomgyu in the passenger seat. They're both quiet, and Soobin tries to focus on the music playing from the radio, humming some lines. Beomgyu stares out the window. Soobin reaches over for Beomgyu's hand, and he lets Soobin hold it, but he doesn't reciprocate much.

"I'm sorry for kind of ghosting," Beomgyu says softly after clearing his throat. "Life hasn't been easy lately. I just couldn't see you."

Soobin nods, even though it's hard to understand Beomgyu, as he's being so vague.

"It's okay," Soobin answers with a small smile. Beomgyu smiles, too.

"Let's go. I need a distraction."

So Soobin drives away. They're driving down the busy streets and then the quiet, empty streets. Soobin feels happiness and relief grow inside of him, knowing Beomgyu is no longer isolating or shutting Soobin out. He squeezes Beomgyu's hand.

They reach the shore after several minutes, the familiar sound of waves crashing and wind blowing through the trees filling his ears. It brings immediate comfort, carrying the various memories of quotes Soobin loved so dearly being read by Beomgyu as Soobin rested his head in his lap.

"Can we swim?" Beomgyu asks, and for some reason, his voice sounds sad. Soobin says yes, because it's Beomgyu asking, and he always wants the boy to be happy.

Soon enough they're in the water, and it's rather warm, despite the overcast skies. While Soobin walks out deeper, dressed in nothing but his shorts, Beomgyu lags behind in the shallow. Soobin smiles and walks back, hooking his arm around Beomgyu's, dragging him further into the water.

The waves grow bigger once the wind picks up occasionally, sometimes swallowing Soobin's body under the water; meanwhile, Beomgyu tries to stay above. Soobin swims back towards him, since he apparently likes being in the shallow, and jumps on his back. Beomgyu laughs as Soobin wraps his arms around Beomgyu.

"Don't let me drown," Soobin scolds. Beomgyu grabs onto his legs, walking further out into the water. When the waves roll over, Beomgyu turns around so their backs crash against them. Eventually, Soobin jumps off his torso, and Beomgyu turns around so he's facing Soobin. Beomgyu gazes at Soobin for a moment, then looks down at the water. He looks so calm, so peaceful, just standing in front of Soobin. Soobin wants to kiss him, kiss his full, soft lips. He just knows Beomgyu's a good kisser; Soobin can tell just by the way he carries himself, how he speaks, the habit he has of licking his lips every so often.

Time passes, and Soobin tries to relax out in the water, even though the waves seem to be stronger as each minute passes. Beomgyu starts drifting further away from Soobin. Soobin keeps an eye on him, especially as the waves become stronger, and Beomgyu gets farther. Soobin gets a little worried, and then starts swimming out towards him, but his body in Soobin's sight just gets smaller and smaller until it eventually disappears. Soobin shouts for him, and in the distance, he sees Beomgyu struggling to stay above the water.

"Beomgyu?" Soobin shouts. Beomgyu makes it out of the deep end, but once Soobin finally reaches him, he's limp and weak, coughing up a storm. Soobin drags his body back to shore as he lets out short coughs, water coming up each time. Beomgyu sits on the sand, hunched over, struggling to catch his breath, until he eventually stops breathing altogether. Soobin's eyes widen as Beomgyu falls backwards, head hitting the sand, eyes wide as he struggles to breathe.

"Beomgyu," Soobin panics. "Beomgyu, look at me." Soobin's eyes are welling up with tears as he panics. He remembers what he learned ten years before in his CPR course; CAB; compression, airway, breath. Soobin straddles his torso, putting all his weight into his palms as he pumps his chest. His tears fall right onto the sand, and Soobin doesn't bother wiping them away from his cheeks. He then tilts back Beomgyu's head, opening his mouth just slightly, pausing before leaning down to put his lips on Beomgyu's. Soobin breathes hard, trying to get any and all life back into him. Soobin was right; his lips are soft, but he doesn't want to have them on his at that moment; he wanted to kiss him, really kiss him, not try to save him from dying.

Soobin waits a moment for Beomgyu to come back, those seconds feeling like hours. He starts to pump Beomgyu's chest again, until finally, water spurts up from his mouth as he starts coughing again.

"Beomgyu, hey it's okay. I'm here," Soobin comforts him as he coughs harder and harder. Soobin gives him space as he turns onto his stomach, holding himself up by his forearms. Soobin grabs his shoulders for extra support as he tries to catch his breath.

"I can't," he heaves between coughs. He starts breathing heavily and quickly, and when he barks up another hearty cough, there's blood covering his forearm. Soobin panics again. Beomgyu starts breathing heavily again, his eyes shut, head hanging loose towards the ground.

"Beomgyu, we have to go to a hospital. Can you make it to the car?" Soobin asks, and Beomgyu nods slowly. Soobin helps him stand up by wrapping Beomgyu's arm around his shoulders. Soobin looks over to him, and Beomgyu's face shows no emotion, but his eyelids are heavy and blood is dripping from his lip. As Soobin looks at him, he brushes a loose strand of hair from his face.

Once they're settled in the car, Soobin scrambles to find a water bottle, but there's nothing.

"Just hang in there, okay?" Soobin tells Beomgyu. He looks at Soobin slowly, and SOobin can tell he needs to say something. Soobin grabs his hand, squeezing tight. "What is it, Beomgyu?"

"Severance hospital, go there," he says, his voice gritty and dry. Soobin nods, squeezing his hand again. He doesn't squeeze back.

A/n:

hey y'all i know you must be mad, but stop okay not my fault!!

don't forget to read my other books yeonbin and taegyu i will be publishing soon.

don't forget to follow Yeonjunnify