Elizabeths' POV

  I just cried in Eds' chest as Stuart and Matt walked around nervously.

  I don't know why Ed did that. But maybe I do. And it's painful just thinking of it. It's about Matt kissing me.

  Ed said he loved me a minute ago and we were kissing when Ed walked in on us. That means that Ed did this because...of me.

  Why? Why did he try suicide? Because I kissed Matt back and didn't back away.

  But I'm also not Eds' girlfriend so why does he even bother? And why am I making these kinda meen thoughts while Ed is here right in front of me, dead.

  It saddens me that it's my fault, but him being like that, saddens me a lot more.

  I love him and he's been there my whole life, he's been my idol, the one that was there through every one of my depresions since 18. I heard him for the first time and fell in love.

  The ginger boy. I used to call him that when every classmate asked me who's music I was obsessed with.     That was my answer.

FLASHBACK

I was going to school with my earphones on, listening to the most soothing voice on earth, the voice that made me feel protected and... good.
  I walked in my music class and wore my hat to hide my earphones so I could listen to Eds' voice.
  I know you think that I like music class but no. It's not like others classes. It's not like 'Hey kids, now with your instruments play shirtsleeves.'
  Yup, our teacher makes us listen to him talking about Bethoven and how music 'reaches' to our highest points. I know you think that talking about music goodness makes me feel good, I do, but this teacher is crazy.
  I listened to Ed sing in my ears and closed my eyes, enjoying the music until I heard a shout.
  I quickly opened my eyes and saw the teacher shouting at me so I quickly removed my earphones in fear. 
"What do you think you're doing young lady?"He asked me.
"Listening to music."I said and he huffed. "Which musician?"He asked me.
"The ginger boy."I answered.

END OF FLASHBACK

  "The ginger boy."I whispered into Eds' ear and kissed him.

  I could feel Stuart's and Matt's eyes on me, but I didn't care.

  I backed away and sighed, a tear of mine falling on Ed's lips.

  "I can taste salt water..."I whispered and kissed Ed once again.

  "That's beautiful."Stuart said, tears in his eyes as I looked at him.

  "Yeah, it is."Matt said angrily and left the room.

  Me and Stuart looked at each other in confusion and I just turned back to Ed.

'I love you'