Dabi wishes he could say he hates the little trips he makes every morning to the cafe. It would be better if the truth was he dreaded seeing his brother every single day. But of course, the fates and apparently his own mind hates him and he's finding it harder and harder to say he despises going there. It's... he doesn't know what it is he just knows it's not a negative feeling. 

He's never been good with emotions. Feeling aren't exactly something the high and mighty Endeavor thinks to be important when it comes to hero work. Maybe he was right, Dabi doesn't know. He's not a hero. Point is, no one taught him to know what he's feeling and he most definitely is paying for it now. 

As he walks into the cafe and hear the bell that's became familiar, he's uneasy about the weird pull in his chest. It's not exciting but it's not worrisome, it's simply there reminding him over and over again like a broken record just who exactly the white haired boy behind the counter used to be to him. If he'd known nostalgia he might have said that was what he was feeling but there was no reason for him to be nostalgic for a past life he hated; one that to this day leaves him scarred both mentally and physically. If anything he should feel happy that he doesn't live that life anymore.

Yet, as he approaches the counter where Natsuo waits, he can't help but wonder what it would be like if they were kids again and these few minutes of conversation between orders wasn't all the time they had together. He'd dismissed the thought quickly. It's fine the way things are. He doesn't wish for that family back. But he still asks himself deep down how Natsuo is. What happened to his little brother these past years? What's his life like outside these cafe walls? 

"Morning again," Natsuo says as Dabi reaches the counter to order. He wore the same smile every morning and every morning Dabi failed to decipher whether it was genuine or not. "The same order as usual?"

He shook his head, placing a some cash on the counter. "No. Add a scone."

Natsuo raised his eyebrows in question. "Skip breakfast or something?" 

"Yes but that's no different from normal," he found himself answering honestly. Dabi spoke again before Natsuo could ask the question he knew was coming. "It's for De- uh, for my brother. The one from before."

It isn't entirely a lie but at the same time it's not true. Deku may not be his brother but the scone is for him. Tonight they both have to go to that stupid meeting with Hawks. Dabi doesn't know why he's being dragged along. Deku can handle Hawks by himself. Brat should be thankful he agreed to come. If the brat complains even once about being hungry or some shit he will snap his neck, hence the scone. Besides, it's Deku's money buying these orders anyways. 

"That makes much more sense," Natsuo said, typing his order into the machine. He handed him back his change. "You don't seem like the scone type. Your brother seems like a cake pop kid though." 

 That took him aback. "A what?"

A light laugh left his brothers lungs. "A cake pop kid! Everyone who comes in here is a certain type of person and the staff likes to pair them with orders. Your brother is a cake pop kid because he's energetic and well, a little brother which makes him the kind of person to ask for a cake pop, either by nagging the person they're with or buying their own. He seems like someone who'd appear to always be running on sugar." 

He got that much from the five seconds they talked to each other, like, a week ago? 

"What kind of person am I?" He asked, taking his filled cup of coffee and scone from him. 

"Well..." Natsuo scratched at his chin and eyed him up and down. "Me and some of the other staff think you're a no cream no sugar kind of guy."

Crossing his arms he narrowed his eye's at Natsuo, not that he could see that with his sunglasses and mask on. "So black coffee?"

"Not exactly." What does he mean not exactly? Coffee without cream or sugar is just black coffee. "A black coffee person is sort of like- well I guess there's that person that has a super punk rock attitude and at first glance is really scary but is actually super nice. Or someone who looks like an insomniac who needs a wake up call." He handed him his receipt. "A no cream no sugar kind of guy is someone who gives off 'I'll-kill-you-in-you-sleep' vibes and tries really hard to maintain that appearance, hence ordering a black coffee but deep down they care for people and are a softy."

What. The. Fuck. 

Dabi blinked a few times. "That's utter bullshit." 

"Order personalities never lie!" He contradicted, chuckling. 

"I am not a softy."

"The fact that you're denying it kind of proves you are." 

"Do you want to be murdered?"

"There it is! The 'I'll-kill-you-in-your-sleep' threat!" Natsuo laughed and Dabi felt like hitting him in the face. He's was told once when he was younger that siblings are more than just a person you cry with when you both are too hurt to go to anyone else. People said siblings were someone you laughed with and teased, the person who's pigtails you tugged and bickered with. He guesses this counts as teasing. 

A frown pulled at his lips. No. He's not going down this rabbit hole. Natsuo is not is his brother anymore just like how he isn't Touya. Touya died and with him those bonds and labels of family. They may still be bound by blood but that is the only things that connects him to the second oldest Todoroki son. 

"Bye asshole," he snarled, turning away from the counter and heading for the door. Before he could make it even one step, cold fingers had wrapped around his wrist. He glanced back at Natsuo. He stared at him with furrowed eyebrows and concern filled eyes. 

"It was a joke," he clarified and Dabi snorted. He knew that which is exactly why he needs to get going. He may be trying to get closer to him for information but Dabi's not about to put at risk the walls he's been building around himself for years. "Sorry. I'm not good at coming across how I mean." 

Apparently no one in our family is. He glared, ripping his wrist out of Natsuo's hand. "Whatever. I'll see you tomorrow." 

"Uh, y-yeah. I'll have your coffee ready!" 

"Don't bother."

He muttered the last bit as he walked out of the cafe, not caring if he was heard or not.

-:-

Dabi threw the bag containing the scone at Deku's face when he came up to him not long after leaving the cafe. The brat fumbled with it in his hands, staring blankly at it before looking at him questioningly. "What's this?"

"Food," he answered, opening up the door to his flat. Deku strode in past him, suspicion still resting on his face.

"Is it poisoned?" 

Like I'd actually tell you if it was or not. He leveled him with a glare. "No. Do you really think I'd poison you?"

He sat down on the bean bag Dabi had successfully stolen the day before from someones dumpster. It's really a waste to throw away something in such good shape. It only has a few holes. Deku peered into the bag, an eyebrow raised. "Yes, it's on brand for you. Besides, why else call me over a whole nine hours before we have to meet Hawks other than to just kill me because I know it's not because you love me and can't wait to waste your 'precious' time hanging out."

At least the kid has that right. It's amusing that for once he has him stumped rather than the other way around. 

He moved to hang his coat on one of the many nails sticking oddly out of the wall. It may be weird, but it's the best he has to a coat hook. Feeling Deku's eye's following him, he said out loud, "Well I did promise to start training you." He turned back around in time to see the kids face light up. "What with your intern and going to that gross hero school, now's the perfect time."

Deku flew to his feet, scone forgotten. It was interesting how his hair bounced as he jumped around with excitement. "You mean it!? You're really going to train me?"

Okay, fuck him for finally acting his age and not like some thirty year old trapped in his body. The energy coming off of him screamed nerdy teenage boy as his eyes widened. Dabi felt like he could laugh at how silly he was. The kid's really that eager to learn to fight? No wonder he became a vigilante. He's got the soul for it with all that ridiculous urge to learn a few basic combat moves. 

"I don't say things I don't mean," he answered, kicking off his shoes. He raised his hands, beckoning Deku to come closer. The truth is he's never been all that good at hand to hand combat. He's dependent on his quirk, and who can blame him? That's how he was raised. He never thought there'd be a time when his quirk wouldn't save him. Until one day he burnt himself to a crisp and couldn't use his quirk without his skin falling off for a whole month and then he had to learn how to fight. Not that it's helped him much since then. His quirk works for nearly anything he needs these days. 

Deku grinned at him and dropped his own jacket on the bean bag, walking over to him happily. "What's the plan Sensei."

"First of all, don't call me sensei," he said, scrunching up his nose in disgust. "Second we'll start with basic movements. You can't do much in your pathetic form right now."

"Hey! It's not pathetic."

He eyed him up and down. His limbs could be mistaken for uncooked noodles at first glance. Revite is many things but he is not fit. "Pathetic is exactly what it is."

"What do you suggest I do then?" Deku asked, crossing his arms. "Want me to go get a gym membership then? Friendly reminder: I'm a child who still needs parental consent for everything." 

"Clean Dogabah beach." 

Staring at him, Deku seemed shocked. He could understand. The beach is a total wasteland with it's mountains of garbage that has washed up onto the shore over the years. It always disgusted him how people ruined such a lovely view with their junk all because they are too lazy to take it to a proper landfill. It'd be good for Deku to clean it up. There's plenty of weightlifting he can get out of it. Plus, it's somewhere he can train with him and not be seen. It's an unpopular place. Perfect for two vigilantes. Er, one vigilante and a villain. 

"You're serious?" He gaped at him. 

Nodding he replied, "Dead serious."

"Okay, I'll clean the beach," he said. "Now are we going to get training?"

Dabi smirked before diving forward and wrapping his arms around his legs. He hoisted him up in the air then dropped him down on the floor so he landed on his back. Placing his foot on his chest, he said, "We've already started. You really are a shrimp." 

"You're an asshole."

"I'll take that as a compliment. Now get up. Lets practice your defensive moves first."

-:-

"You're certain Hawks will be there?" Dabi asked as he tossed Deku a water bottle. After hours of training (more like hours of Dabi groaning at how stupid Deku is when it comes to physical combat with his spaghetti arms) the gremlin is still as chatty as usual. Even as they walk to the spot where Hawks had been told to meet them both, Deku ranted about all sorts of different heroes. It was interesting for him. The crowds he hangs around rarely speak of heroes and when they do it's always about how they suck. Revite talks about them with passion, listing all their flaws and weaknesses, making analyses as he speaks. He could see every idea that popped into his head with how his eyes lit up each time. He spoke of heroes like they were a video game and one or two of the codes were done wrong. Unlike most people, he didn't pick to either love all heroes or hate them, he treated them more like something that could be perfect but isn't because a few people messed up and now everyone falls fault to the system. Maybe Dabi could admire that, if not believe in that opinion himself. 

"He will," Deku said with such confidence it made Dabi almost erase his paranoia. "If he has anything to gain from this, he'll be there."

He glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. "Ever thought that maybe he doesn't  have something to gain from this ever cross your mind? That all of this is just some scheme for the commission." 

"The thought has more than crossed mind." Laughing a little at Dabi's still disproving gaze, he pointed around the alleys. "Relax. I put all the nearby camera's on a loop." He glanced at his watch (when did he start wearing that?). "Hawks will be here any minute. I have to go."

It took several moments for Dabi to process that Deku was leaving down the alley. He spun on his heal, grabbing him by the shoulder. "Where are you going? The whole point of this is so Hawks can meet with you." 

"I know," he said a little too cheerfully. "I need to go do something first. You warm him up with small talk or something. I'll be two minutes!" 

With that, he raced down the alley and out of sight. He sighed, rubbing at his face and wincing when he accidentally tugged on one of his staples. That blasted kid. Why doesn't he tell him anything ahead of time. He should know plans work better when everyone is informed about them. It feels like he's always in the dark when around Revite. Actually, come to think of it, that's a good strategy for Revite. Dammit. He's learning. 

A flash of red caught his eye and immediately his shoulders tensed, hands heating up as he prepared to ignite his flames at any given moment. From the sky, Hawks dropped to the ground, bright red wings tucking in as he landed. Dabi took a moment to take in the hero costume he was still wearing before his gaze landed on the bird mans eyes. 

A frown reached his lips. "Hero." 

"Vigilante," he replied, adjourning a smile. He wanted to punch that forced smile of his face. "I thought I was supposed to be meeting Revite?"

"You are. Don't worry." He lowered his hands, letting his body relax. He's not enough of an idiot to put his guard completely down but can at least save himself from tomorrows back pain by unwinding a bit if it's just Hawks. He won't attack until Revite's here. "He's on his way."

"So it's just you and me, huh?" 

Cue the death glare. "I can and will stab you." 

Hawks snorted and crossed with arms. "With what? Your nails?"

"If it comes to that, yes." Dabi was delighted by the little flash of surprise in his eyes. He was glad he chose to respond with that answer rather than say he has a dozen knives inside his jacket, which isn't a lie. "I doubt it would take much to destroy you."

He raised one of his eyebrows. "You're aware I rank number three in the hero charts, right? Someone like you couldn't take me down."

Dabi wanted to laugh. Someone like him, huh? It's clear Hawks had no idea what he's getting into if that the statement he's choosing to go with. He's well aware he's not a well known person, as both a villain and just in general, but he likes it that way. Birdy over there might think he's unknown because he's low tier but really he could kick his ass any day... probably. Besides that, he works with Revite, likely the most well known vigilante since Crawler. If he was weak, he wouldn't have that position. 

"And who exactly are people like me?" He asked, tilting his head in mock innocence. "Tall, dark, handsome villains?" 

Amusingly, Hawks visibly cringed. He quickly recomposed himself though. "More like vigilantes who think they're a villain but are actually doing good, no matter how hard they try to keep up the appearance of the big bad guy." 

A no cream no sugar kind of guy is someone who gives off 'I'll-kill-you-in-you-sleep' vibes and tries really hard to maintain that appearance, hence ordering a black coffee but deep down they care for people and are a softy.

Snarling, he realized that was the second time he'd been told something like that today. He scowled. Did people really see him as fucking soft? He's not. He isn't. Not in any way shape or form. Maybe he had qualms about killing Revite when he found out he was a kid. Maybe he's a looks a little too forward to going to the cafe in the morning. Perhaps he even is warming up to Deku a bit but by no means is he soft. He'll kill anyone who says he is. Unless apparently those people are his little brother and an annoying bird man. 

"For the last time, I'm a villain, not a vigilante. Get it right." As he said that he saw Hawks open his mouth to argue only to pause as something caught his eye. Dabi turned to look and what he saw made his eye's widen by a fraction. 

Coming down the alley was Deku, or at least what he assumes is Deku. He couldn't tell with what he was wearing. Around his shoulders was a black windbreaker like jacket with green lines going down the sleeves. Underneath he wore a plain black shirt to match the tighter black cargo pants he wore. Dabi doesn't even want to know what could be in those pockets knowing Deku. It could be anything from mini pencils and mini notebooks for his analysis to actual grenades. Over his head was a black cap tucked under the hood of the jacket, his signature green hair barely visible but for a few strands poking out. A grey mask cover his mouth, hiding majority of his baby face features. The only thing recognizable were his green eyes filled with mischief. 

The gremlins smart about hiding his identity for once, he thought. 

Dabi watched him approach them and when he was within arms distance he jabbed his elbow into him. "How come you get a cool suit? Not even going to try hiding my identity?" 

"One, I'm sure everyone already knows you're identity, even the commission. And two, I have a life outside of this unlike you. People I need to protect and jobs I would like to keep." Dabi was surprised that when he talked his voice sounded different. It was lower and scratchier, almost like it was from old camera footage. Damn. Did the kid put a voice changer in that mask? 

"Uh..." Hawks drew attention to himself, waving his hand. "I'm going to assume you're Revite?"

"Oh!" Deku's eyes lit up and he quickly rushed up to Hawks, holding out a hand to shake. "Yeah, that's me."

Hesitantly, Hawks took the hand and shook it. "Pleased to meet you."

"The feelings not mutual," Dabi muttered which caused both Birdy and Deku to shoot him a glare. He rolled his eyes. He's just trying to bring down the mood, they can both chill out. "Whatever. Let's get this over with."

Deku turned his gazed from him back to Hawks. "Ignore him. He's an asshole." He clasped his hands together. "So, you want to make an alliance. I can work with that but first, why would you help us?"

"I want to fix the hero society," he answered. "You're making the change no one else has had the guts to and I want to help. I can be your eye on the inside. I work closely with the commission and a lot of high ranking heroes. I get to see the flaws most people can't. For too long the way of heroes has been messed, you're fixing that. I can't sit by and watch anymore."

Dabi's first instinct was that it was all total bull crap. Then he saw the look in Deku's eyes. 

Since reading Revite's first article, Dabi decided he was a good judge of character. He could see the flaws in someone other people idolized. He didn't go with what everyone else thought, he went with his instinct. Lucky for him, his instincts are usually correct as Dabi has been seeing these past few weeks. He pushed Alloy for information on Endeavor because of instinct, he became Endeavors intern off instinct, he trusts Dabi (like an idiot) off of instinct. Yet, all of his choices turn out for him. 

While working with him, Dabi promised himself that when stuck between a rock and a hard place, he'd go with Deku's instinct. Now, he could see those instincts kicking in and he could see which way they were leading. The boy stared at Hawks with this wide eyed wonder and curiosity that couldn't be mistaken for anything else. There was a glint of determination Dabi could see, almost like he'd just made a promise to himself regarding Hawks. That look both scared and comforted Dabi. 

"Okay," Deku said, pulling a phone out of one of his pockets. He handed the phone to Hawks. "You can help. You'll be a little more useful than our current inside source. I'll contact you on that phone if I need anything. If you want to reach either Dabi or myself, our numbers are on there. The pass code is the same as the one to your apartment."

"How do you-" 

"I did a background check on you. It wasn't hard to find out most of your codes. You should change them to something harder to guess."

Hawks gaped at him for several seconds before glancing at Dabi. "Is he always like this?"

"Sadly, yes." He sighed and scratched at him ear where he had a dozen piercings. "You get used to it."

"Right..." He nodded a little dazed as he turned over the phone in his hands. "Are we done here or is there more I should know."

Deku shook his head. "Nope just remember all of this is confidential and if you tell anyone about what we do, I'm sure Dabi will be happy to burn you." 

Fuck yeah, he thought. For once I wouldn't mind burnt chicken. 

Birdy put on a grin. "Great. I'll keep and touch. Thank you. I'm really glad I can help with all of this." He flashed a smile at Dabi. "See you around Vigilante." 

Before he could do anything to retaliate, he took of into the sky. Asshole and his fucking bright red wings. He knows he can fly but he doesn't mean he needs to shove it in his face all the time. Dabi lifted his middle finger up and pointed it at the sky where Hawks was already disappearing into the distance. 

Deku came up beside him, knocking his shoulder. "You two get along well." 

"Haha. Die." He sarcastically retorted. The gremlin snickered. "So, what's the plan with him?"

"Meh, don't tell him much," he said. "He'll give us information, we'll tell him some of our smaller plans that we need help with but nothing more than that. I want to work him up to trusting us and then perhaps we'll be able to trust him. He doesn't seem so bad."

Solid plan. Though, he can't agree with the last bit. "Trust me, he is worse than he seems."

"You mean he's annoying for you? Or he's actually a bad guy, not a hero?"

"Guess." He gave him a pointed look to which he stuck his tongue out at him. In truth, he's surprised by how short that meet was. He suspected it would be a little longer, require some more negotiating but Hawks seemed happy to get an inch from them. It only made him more suspicious. Then again, to him heroes are always suspicious. The problem is Hawks acts like a good hero and he benefits from the current system. Why would he try to change it. It made him think back to their first time meeting, when he'd caught him from falling to his death.

"He's met me before this you know. At Endeavors fight I watched. I may have burned a few of his feathers," he accidentally blurted.

"Yeah same. For the meeting, not the burning his feathers part."

Glancing at Deku, he furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. He's met him before? "When?"

"First at Endeavors fight. Then at Endeavors party yesterday."

The party. Right. He completely forgot about that which is for the best he guesses. He doesn't like thinking about when he was younger and those parties were more frequent. Too many nights he'd be trapped in his room. Too many nights when he was also forced to leave his room and socialize. 

He crossed his arms, feeling a weird gap in his chest and desperately trying to close it up again. Choking on his words, he forced out, "Did you get any information from the party?" 

Deku shrugged. "Not much. I planted a listening device for if we need any evidence of... things later. I did get to speak to Shouto Todoroki though."

Shouto. 

Dabi was surprised by how long ago he'd last heard that name. He's more surprised by how long it's been since he's let himself sit down and even think the name. That name now was ringing in his ears and suddenly he remembers why he doesn't let himself think it. 

There's so many things, so many emotions he can't begin to understand tied to his youngest brother. Emotions so powerful they come like waved that continuously knock him down. Memories of his father tossing him aside for another son with dual colored eye's and days when he'd watch them train for hours, his own arms aching from burns, came flooding back to him. Years ago he'd been his fathers favorite, he'd been his prize and champion. Then Shouto came along and changed that. To this day, he wonders if that was a blessing or a curse. 

Clenching his fists at his sides, he grit his teeth. He'd frozen and Deku was looking at him weirdly but he barely noticed. Again, something griped at his chest and his throat felt dry. 

He isn't weak. He is not weak. This doesn't affect him. The rage and anger will only fuel his fires.

Repeating the mantra in his head does little to ease his thoughts. Deku takes notice and starts speaking again, saying all the wrong things. 

"I got some information from him. Not much. It'll be good though if I can get to know him. He likes soba, like you. Actually we got in an argument about that when I told him you liked hot soba more than cold.  We ended up going to the kitchens and-" 

Shut up. 

"-we had this contest about who could cook the best soba. It was nice to have something to do. I was really scared I was going to make a fool of myself and then I wouldn't be able to get close enough to him for when the time comes to save him. That would be bad. I was hoping Sutorimu would help but she didn't. I'm getting off topic, sorry. Shouto is really interesting-"

Shut up. Shut up. I don't want to hear about him. 

"-and has a weird sense of humor but I liked him, surprisingly. I think you'd like him, maybe. It's nice to know the person I'm saving isn't a total jerk even if he is a little monotone. I can't wait to see him use his quirk. It's so-"

"Shut up..." he managed to get out barely a whisper. 

Deku's eye's snapped up to meet his, panic visible in them. Worry etched across his features and he reached out a hand towards him. "Dabi... I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

He swatted the hand away. He almost wished Hawks were back here so he could redirect Deku's pitiful gaze to him. Shoving his hands in his pockets, he stormed back the way they came from. "Just- I have some things to do. Go home kid. I'll..." He paused, trying to pick out his words. As much as he hates to admit it, it's not Deku's fault and he can't be mad at him. He doesn't know. He's just a kid, even if sometimes he seems more mature than his age. He sighed. "I'll see you tomorrow."

With that he stormed off, feeling Revite's eyes follow him till he was out of sight. He swears he heard him mumble a goodbye under his breath. Dabi wasn't paying attention though. He was shoving down everything that came bubbling up in his mind. He doesn't know where he went, he let his subconscious guide him till he reached an empty area far enough away that no one would see what he was about to do. 

All the hate, the pain. All of it resurfaced in him. He hated that home, he hated that goddamn family and all fucked up things they did to each other, to him. Every burn, every hit, every fucking hour spent doing the same move over and over again, never once perfecting it. His father... Enji wasn't all of it. Shouto, he ruined so much. They weren't fine but they were better before he came along. Mom was still there, even if only in part. He was able to protect everyone before Shouto showed up. He was the champion. He was supposed to be the one Enji chose first for everything. 

Flashes of fire, red and blue, filled his head and he sunk to his knees. If he had not dried up his tear ducts years ago he would have cried, he thinks. Now only dry sobs ripped at him at his chest clenched. Anger tugged at his heart, at his ribs, his lungs, his throat. It clung to everything that helped him breath the oxygen that keep shim alive. 

His arms were the first to light on fire, the skin there long since dead and painless. The flames worked their way over all of his body, eating away at skin. He didn't care. All he could think of was Shouto and his father. He could see them like it was yesterday. Both standing before him, looking down on him even as he reached for their hands. 

And then he did something he hadn't done in a while but all those years ago he'd discovered worked best. Something he did every time the emotions got to much. The same thing that took the pain away while giving so much of it.

He let everything burn.