Genre: Short Story/Paranormal

Title: Lucid
I already like your story, even from just reading the title. Lucid dreams are terrifyingly fascinating, and I'm already feeling that. However, I feel as though lucid dreams are a bit cliché, nowadays. For that, your point value will still be at a zero, so far. None given, none taken.

Cover
I do like your cover, I must say. I like the astronomical elements that we sometimes imagine dreams as, and I like that you put the main character in the center. There's a mystique about it that also associated with dreams and makes me curious. Well done with the image, for sure. +1 point for that.

That being said, I feel as though your title should be in the center/towards the top of the cover. My eyes are instantly drawn to the "blank space" between the two faces at the top. I understand that you don't want the title to take away from the background picture, but I think that putting the title at the bottom takes away from the title. It appears off-set with it at the bottom. Also, I would like to see your username on the cover. You're the author, and by seeing it on the cover, I can tell who it's by at a mere glance. It makes the story look more professional as a whole. However, no points lost! These are very minor issues that are only my thoughts. :)

Blurb
Your blurb could be better, in my opinion.

The content is actually good. I like how it's written in the view of Lucy (Lucille), something pretty unique around Wattpad. Well done. I like the cliffhanger at the end, as well. A good hook on the blurb makes or breaks whether or not a reader will open and read it. Yours definitely gets me interested.

The biggest issue I have with the blurb, however, is grammar—specifically commas (tip: two independent clauses must be separated by a comma and a coordinating conjunction, like 'and'). When you describe what lucid dreaming is, either separate that part and the clause before it into two different sentences, or add a conjunction (I would prefer the first option, but it's up to you if you decide to fix it). Also, when you use ellipses (the three dots, "..."), the next part should be connected. Like this...and this. There's another comma error just like the first one in the paragraph after the ellipse error, and an ellipse error after that. Four grammar errors isn't that much, but for a blurb that's four paragraphs long, it's a bit much.

For that, my friend, you lose one measly point. So sorry! You broke even, though, so you're not in the negatives! So far, so good. Onto the actual story.

Chapter 1: The Danger of Dreams
I do like the first line. Intriguing, indeed, considering the captivating title of the chapter. Cheers to that! The rest of the first paragraph, however (and the whole story, for that matter), is strewn with grammar errors. You won't lose any points for that on this part, but I'll give you some tips. Maybe you want to try reading your chapter before you publish it (unless you already do that, of course). Sometimes reading it aloud helps with errors like commas and semicolons. When there's a natural pause, you need punctuation. There are tons of resources online where you can learn about which punctuation to use, even if you have to look it up every time you think you might need one if you don't remember (I can never remember specific dialogue rules!). There are more grammar errors throughout the rest of the story, I'm assuming, so I won't mention them unless they need a lot of fixing.

The dream itself is very artistic, and I like the play of dark and light. I love the cliffhanger that every scary dream comes with, and the choking feeling. Very nice on your part. I do wish that you had italicized the dream instead of bolding it. In my experience, dreams are  usually italicized. +1 for the creative dream.

Waking up from the dream, the monologue that Lucy breaks into is a bit too sudden for me. I would have liked a more natural transition to the monologue. You already mentioned a lot of that information in the blurb, too. In the monologue, perhaps you should try not to use words like "anyway" when it's not appropriate. True, it gives voice to the narrator, but in this case, it appeared as if Lucy was talking to us extremely fast and trying to fit everything in before she ran out of time. Moving forward.

After the monologue, you use dialogue and revert back to the present narrative (perhaps you don't need this monologue at all, and could introduce the information gradually throughout the chapters). When using that dialogue, it's usually best to either put it at the front of a short paragraph, or separate it altogether. That'll go for the rest of your story.

The grammar issues did lessen throughout the chapter, so I congratulate you for that! There were only a few spelling errors that I'm sure were typing mistakes, too. I'm not sure we need to hear all of Katherine's appearance at that point, though. Descriptions are good in moderation and in good timing. You could gradually introduce her features within your dialogue, such as, "Her speckled brown gaze locked with mine as she frowned, adopting a disappointed stance." A feature of her appearance is there, but it flows along with the present narrative.

For me, you mention too many outfits. Like I said with Katherine's appearance, you should try and make these features gradual, as to not take away from the actual plot. What I, as a reader, want to hear of is Lucy's dreams, not her clothing! You mention outfits with extremely minor characters, too. This goes for the rest of your story, and makes me lose interest very quickly. -1 point for that, my friend. Breaking even once more. Onward.

Your dialogue needs a bit of work. Aside from grammar issues, it doesn't seem realistic to me.

Also, why is Lucy so willing to share her dreams with Katherine? I know that I wouldn't want to share a repeating, scary dream with someone I don't trust with my life. Especially in a lucid dream. It could just be part of her character, though.

The second dream totally caught me by surprise! It was a pleasant surprise, I must say, although a bit of a horror image. It seems as though your dreams are written more poetically than the rest of your writing, and I have to say that I like this better. There are less errors, better flow, appropriate descriptions, and it's more interesting. Consider it!

Chapter 2: The Depth of Dreams
Chapter 2 is a lot better than Chapter 1, in my opinion. There are less errors (there are comma and run-on sentence issues, but in numbers, they're less-occurring). Aside from making the option list into one paragraph instead of separated, there's not a ton to fix. That makes me excited!

In terms of plot, you mention "pills" a little too much at the beginning and the timeline of this chapter is unclear. I can't tell when in her life particular parts are. When Lucy is explaining Sigmund Freud, she says that she doesn't remember much about it, yet she rattled off a ton of information about him! That seems to contradict each other. Nice dream, though! The broken leg totally caught me off guard, and so did the appearance of the shadow. Strange! It makes me curious. However, after the dream, Lucy reaches for the purple pills to ease her pain and so that she wouldn't remember the dream. I'm a bit confused, because I thought that the pills were for before she went to sleep to insure that she wouldn't dream. These seem to contradict, too. Also, in the second dream, there's too much description about the house (in my opinion). I would try and show more of her emotions than anything. Whenever I dream, I remember bits and pieces of what I see, and what I feel is really what I remember. Especially in a nightmare like Lucy's. Good twist at the end with her family home! I'm glad that you're bringing out more of her shrouded past.

However, for two inconsistencies, you lose one point and break even again. So sorry! I hate to keep doing that to you!

Also, when you use the Latin "in somnis veratis," it should be in italics whenever you use it because it's a different language (especially one that the readers may not understand, like cryptic Latin!). I like how you put Latin in there, though! The title of this review book is in Latin, after all!

Chapter 3: The Dark Truth About Dreams
The third chapter completely redeemed your story! Good job on the end! It's by far the best chapter.

Aside from the usual punctuation errors (and that the father's reaction part should be connected), there's not anything drastic. However, when you use words like "infatuation" and "monotonous," I get a suspicious feeling that you might be meaning a different word with the definition that you meant. For instance, I think you mean "ominous" instead of "monotonous." Of course, I could be wrong and could have interpreted it differently. No points given or taken for that.

I like that the readers get a real look into Lucy's past. And wow! I did not see that croissant part coming. I wondered why you included it, until later in the chapter. Good job for answering my question. When they arrive at her house, the description isn't necessary. You used these same words in the previous dream. My brain totally skipped over it!For the very last dream, I love the reflection that Lucy had with herself when meeting dream-Hal. It made me a little emotional! +1 point for that!

I loved the last line! I actually whispered "woah" to myself. I love how you tied in the dreams and Lucy's past in the end, how everything came full circle. +1 point.

So, in total, "Lucid" by Grimwall received two points! Overall, it was a fairly good read, especially the end! There are many areas for improvement, but I do like your style. Keep reading and writing all the time and you'll get better!

Cheers to my first book review on "Librum de Periculum!"